Do you give money to panhandlers?

[cally]

I admit, my automatic response is no. I know I'm wrong and I should offer money.

I went to college in a town with many panhandlers. Litereally, I would be asked for money 10 times a day as I went to and from class. I just said no so I didn't have to decide who deserved it and who didn't. I couldn't afford to contibute to all who asked.

Yesterday, a man approached and wanted money for food. I said no and I feel guilty. I should have offered money. I looked for him after a few minutes but couldn't find him.

What do you do?

[Squatch]

1. Why do they call them panhandlers?

I've been known to handle a pan pretty well in my day.

[Dervill Crow]

70. I wondered that too.

From Merriam-Webster online:

Etymology: back-formation from panhandler, probably from panhandle, n.; from the extended forearm
intransitive senses : to stop people on the street and ask for food or money : BEG
transitive senses
1 : to accost on the street and beg from
2 : to get by panhandling
- pan·han·dler /-"han(d)-l&r, -"han-d&l-&r/ noun

Not a very satisfactory explanation, but between onelook.com and Google, it's the best I could come up with.

[Walt Starr]

2. Nope

I pass the same panhandlers giving the same line day after day. I don't buy it and I don't give to them. One guy always has crutches and makes a bogus attempt to look disabled, yet one day I spotted the same guy walking along with no crutches at all. It's the oldest scam in the book.

Give to homeless shelters where the money will actually be used to help people.

[keith the dem]

11. Nope

I give thousands of dollars and donate hours of time to the homeless shelter at my church and homeless organization to which it is a part. I would encourage everyone to give to the organizations that help the homeless. I find it shocking that most of the homeless I see seem very normal and intelligent but have mental problems that keep them from living a more "normal" life. The best programs will help these guys get a room, a job and the medical attention they need to function in our society. Giving to "panhandlers" will only extend the time before they get real help.

[ultraist]

30. I disagree, there is a real shortage of resources where they can get help

Particularly for women. And funding is being cut once again, thanks to the evil selfish Bush agenda.

My grandmother used to feed people that came to her door during the depression and I think we are going to be seeing some of that again. It's tragic.

[EFerrari]

101. I disagree as well.

And, the average time for people with mental illness to get proper care is EIGHT YEARS. Even I might want a cup of coffee or a burger between now and then.

[sugargoose]

3. I have given food

After living with family memebers who accept funds and use them for something other than they asked them for, my general policy when helping people is to provide them WHAT they need rather than money for it.

[havocmom]

4. Offer fresh fruit

and be generous if they say they'll take it. Maybe they have some pals who could use some too.

I won't give $$ as I worry about it going to buy things which are destructive.

[seabeyond]

7. i dont do this because havocmom

that is putting on a condition to the gift. i stay away from that. if i am willing to hand cash, give as they ask, i have to be willing it is for whatever even a bottle of booze. their right, and i wont judge them in it. destructive not their choice. and that is what i am teaching boys. will not try to make them something they are not, because i want it for the. respectfully it is their to do

[havocmom]

26. My reasons are personal

Dad was an alcoholic and abused children. There was often no food or heat in the home, but there was beer.

I don't judge, but neither will I be a party to putting other kids through the fun of substance abuse as the driving force of parents.

I will stick with fruit and you can judge my actions however you please.

[seabeyond]

38. i hear it havocmom and totally respect it too

interesting. moms side of the family all alcoholics, they all died of alcoholism. we dont know what that side naturally goes from. though appears tis alcoholism. also have a brother living that life. this is what i have had to learn to do, in order to embrace brother, and not judge, cause that does none of us any good. i just have to allow him to be. i guess that is why i do that exercise

this is an amazing disease that hits everyone different. we do what we need to do individually

[seabeyond]

5. i do for a reason

and i do it for my children. adn we talk about an aray of things when i do. it is not feeling sorry for this person. they have made choices,.......imo. yet we have the money, and is nice. and i willingly do it whether the person is deserving or not. not my call. is a gift. and not sitting in judgement, and not creating victim, we do not know. just embace the spirit. a kiss on the cheek, on our way

so bigger for me than just do i

[imenja]

6. I do

Here in South Florida, I don't see many. When I do, they are usually disabled, missing limbs (I'm assuming they are Vietnam vets, but I don't really know) standing at an intersection near the interstate. No one does that if they have any other options in life. Florida does virtually nothing to help provide for the poor. So I do the little bit I can. I notice that people with their new, expensive cars speed by, while I, with my very old compact full of dents, am the only one who stops to give money.

When I was in college, I faced an environment similar to what you describe. Many of those asking for money were young kids. They had lots of opportunities to do other things. I didn't give to them. And in an area with lots of panhandlers, you can't give to everyone. My sense is that the sheer volume of tends to harden people.

[Just Me]

8. I give them a bag of food. n/t

[HEyHEY]

96. SO always have a bag of food at the ready?

[gollygee]

9. If I have some change in my pocket, I give it to them

but I don't give large amounts of money to them.

[Merlot]

10. No, I don't give to money to strangers.

To me it's a little scary being accosted by someone who expects me to open my wallet. Being female, I feel threatened by these guys, sometimes they can be aggressive. Once one came up and knocked on the window of my car in a parking lot.

If I were to give money to people, I wouldn't worry about what they spent it on. Once you give something to someone, it should be no strings attached.

I make donations to charity. And I will feed any stray animal that comes along. My heart goes out to stray dogs and skinny cats.

[SemiCharmedQuark]

12. I sure do whenever I possibly can.

I'm willing to give the benefit of the doubt. There are a lot of poor people in this world and I don't want to let some jerks ruin the concept of giving for all of them.

Asking for money is one of the worst and hardest things someone has to do. They have to deal with people giving them dirty looks and automatically assuming they are lowlifes.

I've worked at homeless shelters. Resources are limited. We would offer one meal and no seconds. People were so desperate they would bring in containers to try and smuggle food out of people or children that had left extras on their plate. Most of the food is disgusting anyway. It's always something that is cheap, long lasting and comes in big quantities. A good deal of it is donated. We would get old bakery delivered in a garbage bag that people would beg to eat.

So if I can give a few dollars so that someone can eat a good meal, if only just to feel normal, like a regular human being for a moment, it's worth it. There by the grace of God go I, right?

[loritooker]

13. Yes, in San Francisco there's still a homeless crisis, not every one can

be sheltered here. If I have food, that's my first donation choice, but I give dollars, because there are a lot of people here in need. I don't think most homeless people here are scamming--there are many very messed up homeless people here. If you are a student you probably can't afford it, but if you have an apple or a banana or a bagel that's a good gift, too.

[ScreamingMeemie]

14. No I give them food, or whatever it is they say they need. Many times

they turn me down when it isn't $$$. Once a man wanted money for gas...I offered to pay for a half tank (he and his wife had a nice truck) and he took off.

[Padraig18]

15. Some times.

Sometimes I buy them a meal, if they say they need money for food.

[pie]

16. always

if i got it i spend it

[Monkie]

17. i do, it makes ME feel good

sometimes i give my lose change,
sometimes food, or something warm to drink on a cold day.
sometimes when someone asks,other times just cause i feel like it.
i dont care what the money gets used for.
it makes me feel good.
i also dont care why they are in the situation they are in or if its their own fault.

[jayctravis]

18. My friend would buy them food.

If we were approached outside a fast food place, he'd say "I'll buy you a sandwich if you're hungry." Sometimes they would accept, sometimes they wouldn't.

My worst run in was with a guy who certainly didn't look to be starving. I was going into the post office when he said he needed something like ten dollars for a cab, was stuck there in an unfamiliar city and couldn't get hold of his friends. I had about that much money on me and had to mail a package. I said, "Let me run this errand and I'll see what I have left."

When I came out I gave him six dollars. His attitude was like, "What am I supposed to do with this?" He said he needed TEN dollars, not six dollars, and berated me because I didn't have more.

I've been told the people you see regularly get a lot more money than you would imagine. In Miami I frequently gave my loose change from my car to an amputee who worked an offramp with a stoplight and he was always grateful.

[barb162]

51. check my post 45. I hate it when they start arguing I didn't give

enough. I ran into these type people too; this one said his wallet was stolen and he needed to get somewhere and he wasn't dressed as a homeless person. A dollar or two wasn't enough; he wanted way more.

[Liberty Belle]

19. Sometimes, especially if they are disabled or have children.

I've also given food. I just read an article saying homeless shelters and even food lines are turning people away across America because there are more homeless and hungry folks than ever before, and not enough resources to go around.

So...dig a little deeper, folks, and give some of these people the benefit of the doubt.

That said, I avoid those who reek or alcohol or look drugged out, since they clearly need a different sort of help.

[SemiCharmedQuark]

23. Yes, at the shelters I worked at we would have 2 servings per day

There would still be people lined up outside who had not had any food. Those that did get seated would show up hours early.

There's absolutely nothing worse than seeing people get turned away because the place is full.

[Liberty Belle]

92. It's a disgrace that shouldn't happen in America.

[ultraist]

20. Sometimes I do

It's not always safe to pull out your wallet but I have given people cash on the street.

I also used to leave things out for them in my old neighborhood: shoes, clothes, blankets, food, etc and I had a few regulars that would pick stuff up from my front sidewalk. Our shelters are overcrowded and they cannot always get in. We have very few women's shelters.

BUT, you do have to be careful. I had a neighbor who told a guy who looked to be homeless to wait on her porch while she fixed him a sandwich. He pushed through the door and raped and beat her. She was 80! It was really sad. We think he was from the shelter for mentally ill men and was a schizophrenic that had not taken his meds.

Schizophrenics can be very violent if not treated and many homeless people are mentally ill. I would say though, that the large majority are harmless. EXCEPT for the crackheads, they are very violent. Crack does a lot of brain damage.

[Snap]

27. Old Dogs and Bums

I have an old friend and teacher who says that the gods often are in the form of old mangy dogs and bums, this allows them better to see into our hearts.

[bush_is_wacko]

35. Funny you should mention this...I posted about this exact scenario.n/t

[ClayZ]

39. You have a Wise friend and Teacher! eom

[BikeWriter]

110. I resemble... er, resent that. j/k :-)

[judy]

21. I don't think there is any right or wrong,

but I always do when I can.

There was a time in my life where I had no money. I feel so fortunate to have what I have now. I am not rich by any means, but I don't live as I used to, where a simple illness, a traffic ticket or a car breakdown would have me over a barrel, on the edge of homelessness.

For some weird reason, I feel that giving money to people who panhandle, is a way to express my gratitude to "whomever is sitting upstairs" for being able to do so.

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

22. For a long time

I ignored or looked through people such as you describe. Can't say why or when I changed my outlook or attitude but now, if I have a dollar or two, I'll give it to them.
On a metaphysical level, many of the people asking for money have created a reality where they are dependent on the genorosity of others. Maybe by giving someone a dollar, it will be my action that causes them to believe in their own ability to take care of themselves.
Of course I realize there are many people who do not care to work and this is an easier way for them to get along in life. But so why should I care about what they believe? It's only a dollar and it is a small act of kindness. In my reality, it's the least I can do.........
..
edited for terrible spelling. Can you spare some change so I can buy a dictionary? :)

[cally]

34. You are right that I did

not want to connect on a personal level. I can't help all who approach but I can offer a few dollars. Just in my defense, I do donate to food banks and homeless shelters. I'm not totally in denial. I posted this because I justified my refusal by saying I donate elsewhere. I do but I still think I should offer help when asked.

[proud2BlibKansan]

50. Here this one is free

http://www.m-w.com/dictionary.htm

[K-W]

24. Periodically. Perhaps once a month.

Its a little change I would have spent on myself that someone who doesnt have much can spend on themselves. But I cant make a habit of it, where I live I'd quickly run out of money.

[Karenina]

25. I save klein Geld

throughout the year, pack as many coins as possible into the tubes my vitamin fizzies come in, decorate the tubes and give them to the "colorful" punks and their dogs in the 'hood. I don't concern myself with any other issue than they asked for klein Geld, I had some and they are more than welcome to it.

[MuseRider]

28. We do not have too many here

but there seem to be more now than before. Usually they are on the busy streets, in the median. I always swing by somewhere to get some food for them. I am always happy when their sign says something like, "Will work for food" because then you know what they need. I gave some money to a handsome young man who came to our door (we are kinda rural so there are never people at my door) then found out it was a big scam, his dad was working the other side of the road. Still, it feels good to help people, you might get scammed now and then but if you have the money or what they need it always feels good. I do always feel a bit guilty if I pull into a fast food place. They seem greatful but still, McDonalds? Better than nothing I suppose.

[bush_is_wacko]

29. No, but I bought some dog food and a sandwich for one once when

I drove past and noticed his dog looked like it could use some food and he was looking a little frail himself. It turns out he was a really nice guy! he thanked me profusely and offered to do some work for me or something. I told him that wasn't necessary and I would look for him again when I was driving by. He did have a little alcohol on his breath but he didn't ask me for any money. I never saw him or his dog ever again, but I still look for him from time to time. He was old and so was his dog so I imagine he isn't around anymore, but I hope he found a job, and a warm place to stay. He seemed to be one of those lost veterans you always read about.

My dad used to give a homeless man money every day for a paper, but the paper stopped giving them jobs due to the fact a couple of the guys got hit by cars selling papers. My dad says he hasn't seen the guy since then.

Where do they go though? I hate to think they all die off because they aren't getting food and money.

[ultraist]

40. That reminds me of a story of a homeless woman I met

I was living in FL and saw this woman one night, who was in her 70s, on the side of the road with a sign. It happened to be unusually cold, so I told her she could stay the night at my house. My husband (boyfriend at the time) took her, Sarah, to our place and the next morning she wanted to us to drop her at her corner and we did.

THREE YEARS LATER, we are living in NC and my mother calls me and says, "I saw your Sarah on the side of the highway!" ( had described her to my mother as this woman was particularly beatiful and had perfect teeth, I thought that odd for a homeless person). I drove out and sure enough it was her but she did not remember me. I gave her 20 bucks and drove off. (She didn't want to go anywhere).

This woman spends her life hitchhiking from one state to another. She has no desire to go into a shelter or apply for food stamps. She claims to have once been very wealthy but her husband had her committed and she spent 30 years in an upscale mental institution. After he died and no one was left to pay her health insurance, they put her out on the streets. Of course, this may be all fictional, but I more than half believed her when she told me this.

[bush_is_wacko]

57. I would believe her too. My grandmother came from a VERY wealthy and

prominent family. Her wealthy, prominent, father died when she was very young and her mother sold the diamond out of her wedding ring to buy a restaurant in the forties. Yes, she paid in full, with cash, so that gives you some idea of how much wealth I'm am talking about.

For some reason, and I don't know why, my great grandmother flat out refused to ask my great grandfather's family for help. I tend to think my great-grandmother was a step down from society and HIS family may have disowned him for the marriage, but that is only speculation.

Anyway, my grandmother (their daughter) was really quite beautiful in her day, she was a pinup girl during WWII. She was diagnosed as an obsessive compulsive, schizophrenic in her thirties. She had help and was institutionalized for a while, but I am told she once left during her treatment, and lived on the streets for a while. My grandfather did find her and he ended up having to quit his job to care for her. We all worried that he would die before she did, because, honestly, I don't know how he was able to care for her in her less lucid moments, and none of us were willing to live WITH her. She could be dangerous to herself mostly, but she was afraid of my children, so I always worried she might be dangerous to them. She passed away about six months before he did, but we ALWAYS worried he would die and she would take off before one of us could get to her. During their last years of life we all took turns doing daily visits to make sure they were safe and sound.

If it hadn't been for my grandfather my grandmother would have lived out her life on the streets for sure. Her sisters mostly didn't even acknowledge the fact she was mentally ill and BELIEVE me that was very difficult to ignore at times. She remained a beautiful woman really until the day she died and always had that air about her of "aristocracy" even though she died practically penniless. Mental illness isn't exclusive to the poor for sure.

[ultraist]

67. That is so interesting, it sounds like it's right out of a novel!

It's wonderful that your grandfather cared for your grandmother the way he did. Interesting, he lived just long enough to see her through.

Sarah also had a certain heir about her, that's why I tended to believe her. She didn't seem dangerous although she did seem to drift out of reality. She was likely an "embarrassment" more than anything to her family.

[bush_is_wacko]

83. Unfortunately, my grandmother was an embarrassment to her sisters

as well. We all loved her though. She was great in her more lucid moments and she really was like a child most of the time. When she sunk into her schizophrenia though she was a handful. We're not talking just dementia here she got scary! It wasn't really very fairy tale-ish though. I know my grandfather loved her dearly but he did hold some resentment and as a result was a little hard on her at times. I didn't get that as a child but now that they are both gone and I have been married for such a long time I somewhat understand my grandfathers resentment. My grandmother used to call him at his job and harass him on a regular basis and he lost several jobs over it. He easily could have abandoned her and MOST people would have understood, but he remained committed to her until she died. He was truly devastated when she died and I think he did die of a broken heart. I have to clearly state though my grandfather was a VERY hard man. He would be considered abusive by any standard applied today, at least toward his kids. He wasn't physically abusive to my grandmother ever, but he was to all his children. It may have been his frustration with my grandmother, I don't know. I guess he was a hero for my grandmother and my uncles and dad EVENTUALLY saw this too, but they didn't like him much when they were kids at all.

[AgadorSparticus]

115. i always buy my newspapers from this homeless guy on the corner

and i'd give him a few bucks a week for the couple papers i'd buy. sometimes, i'd buy a newspaper even if i already had one. i like that they are actively working. i don't give to panhandlers unless they are old. if they are young, they can work like me. i just can't see why a young person in their 30's or 40's could not work. so i give in other ways.

one way is i buy them food. one time, i was going through the drive through at mcdonalds when a guy approached my car and asked for money for food. i told him to meet me on the other side and i'll buy him some mickey d's. he didn't meet me on the other side. but i found him anyways, and gave him the burgers. he was very thankful.

[idiosyncratic]

31. No, I don't, but would you give this guy what he is asking for?

His sign says: "Homely, Why lie I need a beer."

[SmokingJacket]

32. I give buskers money.

I always give money to someone playing music -- even if I'm not crazy about the music.

And I'll give money to anyone who looks at all old or disabled or sick -- like the woman I saw in NYC a couple years ago: she was wearing nothing but a TRASHBAG in the SNOW. That was *not* a scam. A dollar to buy a cup of coffee so she could get warm for twenty minutes is worth it -- though if she didn't get help that day, she is probably dead now.

If a young, healthy person approaches me I usually say no.

[Window]

33. Usually always.

Occasionally, I'll get a smart mouth... "You know you can afford it", or they'll come with some drawn out story, which you just know is a lie, or they are healthier and younger than me and appear to be just trifling. Most times though, the person is handicapped and really needy, then I don't mind.

[Warpy]

36. Depends on the panhandler.

If they try to sell me some sort of sob story about gas money or needing a bus ticket, they're out of luck.

Guys selling Street News generally do really well from me, and I return the copy of the paper after I've read it so they can sell it again.

Two panhandlers approached me when I first moved to Boston in the 60s. One started to launch into a sob story, the other saw I wasn't buying it and said, "Don't listen to him. We're bums and we need a bottle." They got all the money I had on me.

An old guy was panhandling in a subway station. It was bitterly cold, late at night, and all I had was small change. I apologized for not having enough to keep him warm that night. A yuppie started to lecture me on enabling his drinking. I cut him off and pointed out it was cold, all the shelters were closed, and if he could find comfort that night in a bottle, so be it. Wasn't my decision.

That bum got on the train with me. When anybody'd look at me, he'd jump up and say "Hey, leave her alone. She's all right!" You find knights in shining armor in some really odd places sometimes.

I reward honesty and gumption, and I don't infantilize people by trying to tell them how to spend what I give them. Untreated DTs are 50% fatal, and if they spend it on booze, they need the booze.

There's always a chance they'll spend it on food, you know.

[ultraist]

49. That's true, they can DIE from withdrawals.

You cannot expect a chronic alcoholic to cold turkey. They need to professionally detox in many instances. Same deal for some types of drug addicts.

[ClayZ]

37. My friend bought and collected Panhandler Signs

He had the most amazing collection. They are always most willing to sell. The funniest one said, "Hungry, Please Help, I have Change for Big Bills".

One day I bought a big bag of groceries for a man with a sign that said he had 4 kids and no food. I gave it to him and walked by a short time latter. He had 8 bags of groceries lined up against the bldg. around the corner from where he was standing. That reminded me of a day my husband and I braved a several day long snow/ice storm, to go a couple blocks from our house to the beach to feed the seagulls and pigeons. They were starved, or so the acted, screaching and hollering like they had not had a bite in a month. They took bread right out of our hands. We were VERY popular! When we went to put the empty bread wrappers and cereal boxes in the trash can, it was full to the brim, of bread wrappers and cereal boxes. Ha, those birds were LIARS!

[XemaSab]

72. The birds were probably

crashing from all the sugar and carbs. "We want white bread NOW!"

Gulls are flying rats. If you don't believe this, go to the dump in Corpus Christi. Horrifying.

[oldlady]

41. As an act of civil disobedience

I give to all-- in my city, cops go undercover in the main downtown area, asking for handouts, and give out tickets to those who give them money. It's meant to discourage begging in our best tourist and arts area, so,I give with attitude.

[ClayZ]

47. That is sick! What a horrible thing! That sure does not sound like

Mayberry RFD. What have we come to? I work at the Pike Place Market in Seattle. We have lots of homeless people go through. The restaurants leave food in special places for them. The veggie, fruit, and food vendors give out samples. A hungry person who passes through could be quite full by the time they made their way from one end to the other. We take care of the people!

I can imagine the KARMA for the writers of your law. If a cop gave me a ticket for giving to a panhandler they would WISH they had NOT! I am getting quite vocal about disagreeing with GOVERNMENT lately!

ARGH!

What city does this?

[oldlady]

60. Madison, Wisconsin - State Street

yep, liberal Madison

[Senior citizen]

48. So let me get this straight.......

It is okay for the government to TAKE our money in the form of taxes,

but it is illegal for us to GIVE IT AWAY to the needy?

The mind boggles.

[Abies]

42. Not anymore

You don't always know where the $ goes, or if they are posing just to make $ off of generous people.

When I was in high school I was asked for $ from a woman at a gas station so she could "buy a burger." I gave her a few bucks, even though I didn't have much at the time, either. So I went in to pay for my gas and she was in line behind me -- she proceeded to buy some cigarettes with my money. I haven't given anyone $ since.

In college I lived in a downtown area where I would be asked for money all of the time and I didn't give anyone anything. In the span of two weeks I was approached by the same person twice. The first time he had some sob story about needing $ for a bus ticket home, the next time it was some other story told to me a week later with some twist I don't recall. I just told him that the second story was less convincing than his first one.

Because of these dishonest individuals I will not give $ to people asking for it. I have no way of knowing what they will spend it on, or if they even need it. I will give them food, though and I try to support homeless shelters and make food donations as often as I can. I just don't want my "donation" to buy booze or drugs.

[GardeningGal]

43. That happened to my mom once, she had a great response

She was approached in the middle of the winter (Colorado) by a woman asking for money for food. This was outside of a grocery store, so my mom said no she wouldn't give her any money but she would take her inside to the deli and get her what she wanted. They went in and mom bought her a several pieces of chicken and a big cup of hot coffee and the woman was very thankful.

I thought that was pretty smart of my mom. As for me, I sometimes give them money.

[KG]

44. yes. and usually a substantial sum, if i got it.

there, but for grace, go i.

[barb162]

45. Sometimes. There are times when I do give and they start arguing

with me to give them more! Like a dollar is not enough and they say what can I do with a dollar? As if I OWE THEM more.

Do any of you have this happen?

[proud2BlibKansan]

46. Absolutely not

If I were to give them anything, it would be a card with the name and adddress of the nearest homeless shelter.

The intersection where I see the majority of people begging for money is right across from a liquor store. You can drive around the block and watch the same ones who get money walking out of the liquor store with one of those little brown sacks within 5 minutes of receiving money from a generous soul driving by.

[murielm99]

52. We don't have any homeless people here in our small

rural community. But when we go to Chicago, we always see them. My husband keeps some money in his pocket just to hand out to people.

When we were younger, we really struggled financially. We always had a home, but we have seen some tough times.

Maybe the handout goes to booze and drugs, but maybe it goes to a warm meal and a bed for a night.

[knitter4democracy]

122. The homeless in rural communities are harder to find.

I grew up in the country. I had classmates I knew who were literally living in dirt floored shacks with no running water. They had one or two outfits to wear to school and washed them after school in the locker room or one of the lesser used bathrooms. I only knew about it because my mom was the art teacher and befriended hundreds of kids, many of the poor ones, and then helped them out as best she could with clothes, laundry soap kept in her room for them to use in the washers and dryers in the home ec room (after she talked that teacher into it), stuff like that. It wasn't unusual for us to take a kid out to eat after school.

The rural poor are worse off in many ways--bad busing system, can't afford taxis at all, walk miles to anything and everything, no soup kitchens close by, and worst of all--they're invisible.

[DisgustedTX]

53. Rarely - approached at least 5-7 times/day

I'm often approached multiple times/day by the same individuals with different stories each time.

It becomes easy to pick out the needy from the lazy after a while.

[Stirk]

54. I used to. Then my own brother became a panhandler.

And I don't give money out anymore. I give to charities, but not panhandlers. The way my brother would talk about people who gave him money- it just blew me away. He called them suckers.

He had a drug problem at the time, and has since begun cleaning himself up. I tried to help for a long time before I finally realized that I was only making his determined trip to the bottom all the more comfortable.

Anyway- I'm sure that all panhandlers aren't like my brother was. But what can I say? I guess I'm jaded, because every time someone asks me for money, all I see is my brother.

[autorank]

55. When I lived in Manhattan, all the time. Glad to do it.

[Yupster]

56. I almost always do

The reason is kind of selfish.

Jesus told the story of how some people would be let into heaven because hey fed him when he was hungry and clothed him when he was naked. They asked him when he was ever hungry or naked, and he told them that what you do for the least of my brothers, you do for me.

That's a haunting verse of the bible to me.

When I see the least of my brothers, I give.

[grasswire]

62. exactly

...and thanks for raising the model of Jesus for how we are to live in this world. I'm not a "Christian" in the traditional sense any more, but I am an admirer of his teachings and believe them to describe a fruitful and rewarding way to interact.

The key to Jesus example is the concept of "grace" -- unmerited favor. The extension of unmerited favor is simply the hallmark of goodness in the world. The human soul is enriched by giving without any expectation of "merit" in the recipient.

Any professing "Christian" would understand that the ultimate "gift" of Jesus' life was given with NO regard to merit in the recipient. That is the key to Christianity. That is why Christians are instructed to give without any expectation of repayment, to give more than is asked, to give SACRIFICIALLY, and to give without any expectation that the recipient is going to behave as we want them to behave.

I do FULLY believe that needy people are put into our paths to see what kind of nature and character we possess. Several have been sent my way, I believe. I dared NOT ignore them.

And I have been the recipient of generosity from strangers as well.

[phaseolus]

58. probably not anymore. someone took advantage of my good nature

...and that really pissed me off.

Far North side of Chicago. Eastbound Peterson exit off the Edens. Desperate sounding woman with her husband, I pulled over when she flagged me down. Dead battery *and* out of gas, ten bucks wasn't enough, could I give her another ten so she wouldn't have to ask anyone else?? And she'll send me the money in a few days. Sure, for a change I had a bunch of spending money on me (mostly leftover christmas money,) and there but for the Grace of God go I, ya know. Drove away and thought to myself "dead battery *and* out of gas???!?!??"

Drove back and they were gone. I've had revenge fantasies ever since of trapping her arm in my car window, pulling my $20 out of her pocket, and scattering the rest at the side of the road before letting her go...

I think what pissed me off the most was she was intent on talking me out of every last possible nickel *after* I'd given her ten bucks. I'm not rich -- I'm probably two paychecks away from disaster, and 20 bucks is still a lot of money for me...

[tinonedown]

59. coming and going

Twice a day, once on the walk to work and once on the way back. It's expected and a budgeted part of my yearly charitable giving.

[Blue Wally]

61. I prefer to help the working poor

If I go to a fancy restaurant (Good evening,I am Bernard and I will be assisting you with your dining choices this evening), I just give the standard tip.

If I go to a place like Denny's and there is a very harried looking middle aged waitress and I can see the stress in her eyes, I am likely to leave a $20 tip just for pie and coffee.

[otohara]

63. Yes, Unless Their Sign Says "God Bless You"

I hate that!

[Runcible Spoon]

64. I do, and I don't care if they spend it on booze.

I usually get accosted on the street in front of a bar, so I figure that's what I was going to spend it on anyway. I don't make moral judgments. If someone wants to use the money for something productive or something destructive, so be it. There will always be people who abuse whatever aid is given them and those who will try to change their situation. I'm not going to morally lord over them, I just realize I was more fortunate than they in life and many fortunate people also squander their own gifts.

[ultraist]

65. Causes of Homelessness

http://www.nationalhomeless.org/causes.html

Two trends are largely responsible for the rise in homelessness over the past 20-25 years: a growing shortage of affordable rental housing and a simultaneous increase in poverty.

Urban Institute study which states that about 3.5 million people, 1.35 million of them children, are likely to experience homelessness in a given year (Urban Institute 2000).



POVERTY
Eroding Work Opportunities
Declining wages
Decline in Public Assistance
People with disabilities
Lack of affordable HOUSING
Domestic Violence
Mental Illness
Addiction Disorders
Veterans: Approximately 33% of homeless men are veterans, although veterans comprise only 23% of the general adult male population. The National Coalition for Homeless Veterans estimates that on any given night, 299,321 veterans are homeless (National Coalition for Homeless Veterans, 2003).

For families, the numbers are even worse: 52% of emergency shelter requests from families were denied, a 22% increase from last year (U.S. Conference of Mayors, 2001). In addition, a review of homelessness in 50 cities found that in virtually every city, the city's official estimated number of homeless people greatly exceeded the number of emergency shelter and transitional housing spaces (National Law Center on Homelessness and Poverty, 1999). Moreover, there are few or no shelters in rural areas of the United States, despite significant levels of homelessness (Aron and Fitchen, 1996).

[Autumn]

66. Yes

I do. I have been blessed and I see no reason not to be a blessing to others.

[bigtree]

68. my dad did

At the end of his life, when I had him under my wing, he would do this when we were out and it frankly embarrassed me into giving myself. Now I never hesitate to.

[Dervill Crow]

69. If I have cash on me, I do.

Like the other poster, I think of the bible verse where Jesus said "when you give to the least of these, you give to me." Or something like that. It's been a while since I've read the Bible.

I'm no longer a Christian per se, but Jesus said a lot of good things.

[Piperay]

71. Mostly no but sometimes

depending on the person. I may give money if they are older or have an animal with them or are in a wheelchair but most of the time I don't unless there is just something about them that tugs on my heart.

[grasswire]

73. let me provide an illustration

Some years ago I was in living in the D.C. area and was on the Mall with my daughter taking in the museum life. It was dusk as we left, and a chilly evening. As we walked down Pennsylvania Avenue heading for the car, a big man stepped in my path.

"Do you have anything to drink? Some water?"

I saw that he was part of an extended family group. Grandmothers, babies, children. English was not their first language. I fished out a couple of leftover juice boxes from my bag, and handed over with a smile.

We kept walking to the car. Daughter (a young woman) said "Mom, we have to go back." Something was more wrong than a need for a drink. I knew it, too.

We went back, and the family was still on the sidewalk, outside the Museum of Art. There was a little murmur from them when they saw us return. Smiles and heads nodding. Josef explained that they were visiting from out of town and had parked their van in a garage that (unknown to them) closed at 6 p.m. They had nothing to protect themselves and nowhere to go. No access to their belongings until morning. They had locked their remaining cash in the car for protection.

Immediate problem: hungry people, exhausted grandmas. We were a dozen blocks from Union Station, and I ferried the old and the young in my little car while the others walked. Eighty dollars of Big Macs and milk filled their stomachs. (A lot of money from my single-mom budget.) Restrooms provided comfort. Plenty of chairs, and safety.

Then I tried to find some shelter for them overnight. I phoned some church people I knew. The church in the suburban area that considers itself the most socially conscious would do nothing to help. (Ken Starr's church, incidentally.) I could find no place for them to overnight. Going to my apartment wouldn't have helped, as it was ninety minutes away and would have been impossible to get them back and forth in the little car. And yet I had to get home for daughter's medicine dose.

Staying at the train station seemed to be their safest option. And so we said our goodbyes. But I had one question for Josef. "Why did you stop me? Out of the people walking down the street, why did you stop ME?"

"I kept telling my family that God would send us an angel to help. I knew it was you."

Stunning, humbling words. I dare not ever refuse a request again.

[UdoKier]

74. Occasionally. I would more often if I wasn't so broke.

I kind of resent it, since I'm only a paycheck away from the street myself, but I know they have no way of knowing that.

Generally, i'm more of a sucker for handicapped people. I know how hard it is to find a job if you're a 50+ male with limited skills. God knows how it must be if you're an amputee.

[Nikia]

75. Not many in my small town

I have given to panhandlers in other cities though.

[cally]

76. Thanks for all your responses

You have taught me a lesson. Just give if you can. Duers are the best.

[XemaSab]

77. I went to school in Arcata, CA

The town has a LOT of panhandlers of all different stripes.

Some of them are regular residents who are mentally ill or have substance abuse problems. These people need help that goes far beyond a handout.

Many panhandlers in Arcata are hippie kids who hitchhike to Arcata to hang out for the summer and smoke dope. They often have their daddy's credit card in their pocket and are wearing hippie outfits that cost a LOT more than what I'm wearing. They're probably going to spend any money they get on weed. If someone is "choosing" to be homeless then I see no reason to give them a handout. Some of the kids there are in worse shape than that, but it's tough to tell who "needs" a handout and who doesn't. I talked to one kid for a while who said that in other towns there are odd jobs like mowing lawns, but the odd-job market in Arcata is tough.

The Arcata city council has made sitting on the sidewalk downtown a crime, and I think that's just fascist.

On the other hand, it sucks to feel uncomfortable going to the woods or the park or the marsh because the place is full of scary hairys. The city's parks department shouldn't have to cut down all the bushes to keep the homeless people from living there. That's just not right.

[drdon326]

78. I occasionally do...

weird story....I get coffee every thru the drive thru at McDonalds and for a week this really sad looking emaciated dog would hang out at the drive thru.

I bought the dog $5.00 of canadian bacon every day for a week and the dog scarfed it down.

I was going to take it home but the dog just disappeared.


I still think about that dog.

[sakabatou]

79. I've never offered them money

but sometimes i give 'em leftovers froma restaurant.

[DaCheat]

80. Anthens Georgia

Has these places where you can put money, and the organization that has them buys the homeless food and shelter. Its best to do that, because often times hobo's will buy drugs, beer, or other things. This way, they get a good meal, and a good place to sleep.

[Egalitariat]

81. If they want money for food, then I give them food***

nm

[Dorian Gray]

82. Usually I do. Whatever change I have in my pockets.

But, not always. They're, sadly, often known to use the money for bad things. So, what I will do more often than give money out is give our $5 vouchers for McDonalds and Burger King. I know it's silly, and I know they could sell it for half the price, but it's my way of ensuring that they will more likely use it for some sort of food.

[chlamor]

84. Yes-For Drink or Food- Anything To Ease the Pain

But never to these panhandlers

[Name removed]

85. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[SmokingJacket]

90. The rich and the poor rarely mingle.

The rich can keep the poor out pretty easily, can't they?

Ruins the party if you have to look at homeless folk while chomping your caviar.

[Name removed]

91. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[SmokingJacket]

105. Aww, gone so soon?

[area51]

86. "What do you do?"

I give them food. I carry peanut butter/crackers & "energy bars" with me that I can give out.

[TrustingDog]

87. I give.

I buy food for ones who ask, I throw change out of my car window when I am asked. Not all that often I confront this, but when I do I feel good about it, and it's worth it.

Once that money leaves my hands it is not mine and not to worry about how it's being spent, etc. The decision was mine to give and give gladly.

[Cleita]

88. Occasionally.

I hope they aren't taking advantage of me and I hope they buy food or whatever they need, but I don't feel I have a right to questions what they will do with it after I give it to them.

[PowerToThePeople]

89. It depends

Sometimes I do, sometimes not. One day a saw a woman sleeping in an alleyway while walking home from work. Went to McD's and got her some grub and an OJ. Came back and gave to her. Figured it was a "better" thing to do than just give money.

[SeveneightyWhoa]

93. No way.

They could get a job, but then again, panhandling usually pays more. I've read articles about a (now former) panhandler in my city who was actually pretty well-off and got whisked off in a car after a successful day of asking for money -- and getting it.

[Spacejet]

94. No...

There's a little bit of a trust factor sadly. Plus I only work part time while I go to college now so I'm not exactly rich.

This is not to say that I don't give. For example, last year a month after my self and a close friend graduated high school she told me she thought she was pregnant and was terrified. (extreme right wing nut case family the type that would throw her on the street, guy who got her pregnant didn't give a damn about her) Thanks to no sex ed in this state she didn't have a clue about how to have safe sex. She got tested and was. It was her first time too.

She wanted an abortion, and I gave her money to pay for it at planned parenthood. (costed several hundred dollars)

After that I got her two books so she could learn about sex and how to be safe. Most of it was new to her. She always uses contraceptives now.

This was a close friend though. The person on the street unfortunately could easily be a con artist.

[BrutalEntropy]

95. d

hate to say it, but I usually don't

mainly because I don't carry cash... I've been known to give them change, and I've given a few bucks to some of the guys who stand on the freeway exits

sometimes I'll give them cigarettes, because most of them smoke and well I don't have cash so at least I can share my cancer (that's meant to be sarcasm)

[SheWhoMustBeObeyed]

97. No

I get hit up a lot because I look like a mark *shrug*. There are people I know who need financial help, I know why they need it, and they're the ones who get it. Strangers, no. I don't think it's wrong. My resources are limited and I can't help everyone. When I can I donate to local food pantries and disaster relief.

[oasis]

98. Yes. But not inside business establishments.

[magellan]

99. I always give

My husband hates it, says they'll just use the money on drugs or drink. I tell him he has no conscience. Personally, I can't bear to pass by down-and-outs who are asking for nothing more than spare change. It's true, you can't know if they're genuine or what they'll do with the money. But it could be you've just handed them the last dime they need to buy themselves the first proper meal they've had in days. I've seen that happen.

Give when you can. Let the money go. Do it with a smile and a kind word. It's worth believing that you've quite possibly helped someone in dire need.

[d_b]

100. from time to time.

[superconnected]

102. I give sometimes

When I worked for the City of Seattle, I saw the same pan handlers everyday. I was still buying into the, "they are a scam and don't need the money", thing. Then I started missing getting off at my bus stop sometimes early in the morning and had to get off at a later stop where when I walked past many of them sleeping on the sidewalk, that I recognized. This happened in summer and in winter and I can say, for 3 years, the people I saw, slept on the street.

Now the ones at freeway exits don't often get my money. I still think they are a scam.

[mark414]

103. usually

whenever i have some extra cash...though these days i'm strapped so i usually don't have much to offer

i had a better job this year and was lucky enough to make a few people's days more than once

haha there was this time when i was walking to the grocery store and a guy started talking to me, dennis was his name, made up a bunch of shit about how he played in motown; anyways, i invited him in to the grocery store with me and asked him what i should get; so i got what i needed and gave him a bag of everything that he had picked

i figure who the hell am i to judge them? often people will say, "no, they're just going to buy drugs and alcohol"

well that's what I'D spend it on anyways, so people need to stop being so goddamn judgemental

[lostnfound]

104. I started bringing a banana, sometimes a sandwich every day

to give to a man on the corner near work.

One day it dawned on me that if my little boy were to grow up and be hungry and homeless, it's the least that I would want someone to do for him.

Better homeless and fed than homeless and hungry.

[MsTryska]

106. it depends.

if i'm asked, no.


if it's one of my familiar face bums that i see often, i will give them some money or food or what have you, when i have extra.

[Senior citizen]

107. I was homeless for about twenty years.

But life was easier in those days. I never had to ask people for money. The economy was better, there were fewer homeless people, it was easier to get part time or temporary jobs, AIDS didn't exist yet, there weren't so many homeless veterans. I had it pretty good.

Nowadays I have a place to live but I am very low income, so I often have trouble getting through the month. It gives me great pleasure if, at the end of a given month, I have a few extra dollars that I can give to a homeless person. I'll even go out of my way to do it. I know how much harder their lives are than mine was.

Another thing I know from experience is that many homeless people appear frightening because they have to, just to survive. It took me a few years to adjust, but once I got off the street, I became a totally different person--much less defensive, since I no longer had to be constantly defensive.

One thing I know is that I never expected to have a place to live. I fully expected to be homeless until I died. I consider it a minor miracle that I survived long enough to be eligible for subsidized senior housing, and that my application was accepted. Many homeless people have a background (drugs, felonies, etc.) that makes them ineligible, or they simply don't live long enough. I know that I wasn't homeless by choice, because I didn't want to work, or because I was a bad person. I also know that many homeless people are predators and don't deserve any help. When I was homeless, I was victimized by other homeless people, and I can usually recognize the type. I won't give them a dime.

If someone demands money from you, call the cops. A person who demands money from passerbys, will forcibly take money from other homeless people who are more vulnerable. If you see someone you can help, do it. Often the people most in need are the ones who are too depressed to ask for help.

If you can't put yourself in their shoes, God might.

[Canadian Socialist]

113. Your story really hit me

I don't normally give to the panhandlers. Why? Because the one's that hit me up on my way to the bus stop (3 blocks from where I work) are all young with piercings and new tattoos. Now, work with me. I have priced these embellisments. They are not cheap. Plus, this always happens in front of a very "drug friendly" park. As well, they are usually better (read: more contemporay) dressed then I. Now, why would I give them any money? I am not heartless. I've given (and still give) to the United Way and the food bank. That's where my measly discretionary money goes. Am I one of those who say "get a job?". You bet. There are agencies in this city that will give you clothes and bathroom facilities to clean up so you can get a job. So don't come crying to me about no jobs. Here, you can get a permanent, affordable residence. So, it's not a 1 bdrm w/all mod cons. It's livable and affordable.

[Senior citizen]

119. In the news just this recently was an item

about something like 1,500 people lined up to apply for 150 Wal-Mart jobs. Jobs certainly do exist, but not everybody is going to get one, no matter how clean and neatly dressed. One of the things potential employers take into account is work history, so simply being unemployed for any length of time means that you are less competitive than other applicants.

That said, I think it is really great that agencies exist to help people get jobs. I once stayed at a homeless shelter where people who were looking for work or working were not permitted. I was very happy to hear that the rules had changed within a few years after I left, because I was actually looking for work or working the entire time that I was there (almost a month) and had to face tremendous obstacles to hide this fact from the staff.

There was another article some years back that touched me deeply. A reporter had interviewed people on a food line, and one explained that he had always thought that people who ended up at places like that were lazy and didn't want to work--until it happened to him. Not to say that there aren't people who are lazy or don't want to work, and you seem to have encountered some of them, but just that not everyone who wants to work can find a job.

If you donate to United Way and the food bank, you are a caring person--and the fact that you try to direct your resources to where they'll do the most good is commendable. I would merely point out that there are also other factors that can contribute to emotional disturbance and homelessness. Some young people have been kicked out of their parents' homes because they are no longer deductable (we know that there are some parents who kill their kids, and some who abuse them, so obviously there are also some who simply do not particularly love or care about their kids), and sometimes people end up homeless due to extremely hostile work environments. Unless you are familiar with the horrific abuse some people have to endure at work, you might not understand the pressures that drive some of them to "go postal" and others to simply walk away. Having once walked away from a job like that, to this day I harbor a secret admiration for the ones who go postal. Again, unless you've walked a mile in another's shoes, it is usually better not to judge. When I learned that some physically disabled people refer to us as the "temporarily able-bodied," I immediately saw the wisdom born of their experience. Accidents and bad luck can happen to anyone at any time, and many of us superstitiously try to ward off disaster by treating others in need the way we hope others would treat us or ours if our turn comes. It may or may not help, but it never can hurt.

On edit: May your job not be outsourced, your company not move offshore or go bankrupt, and may new management not decide to downsize by eliminating your position, and, if any of these unhappy events should occur, may you find a new job immediately. I would like you to understand that not everyone can get a job, but I'd like you to learn it vicariously, if possible.

[oasis]

116. If I were president, you'd be my first choice HUD secretary. Your

wanting to do the right thing by those not able to help themselves puts you on top of my list.

[Dave Reynolds]

108. I have before,

but it depends on who's asking.

I'm a bit of an asshole, I will only give to the ones who do not appear to be drunk or high.

Also, some folks need to work on their stories. One guy asked me for money, saying he had run out of gas on the freeway, he had lots of photo equipment in his car and needed gas money. I offered him a LOAN with some piece of equipment in collateral, and he did not wish to speak with me any longer.

[walldude]

109. If I have spare change, sure

or a smoke(being a smoker I get asked more for smokes than money). What amounts to a few cents to me, could mean the world to the "panhandler". I think Roger Waters put it best in the Pink Floyd classic Us & Them:
"For want of the price
of tea and a slice
the old man died"

[bluedipper]

111. depends

There are too many fakers around my area, they go and deposit over $500 a day into the bank, believe me I have seen it. My dad works his ass off and doesn't make that much, I do wish more of them would try to find a job, believe me there are places that people donate too around here that will clean homeless people up, give them clean clothes, so they can go look for a job. However if someone is out playing music and at least making an effort, I will sometimes give them some change. -BD

[DawgHouse]

112. Yes, if I have money on me

I always give either spare change or a buck or two. There are many homeless, down-on-their-luck people in Florida, especially during the winter months. The saddest ones are the young people. I look at them and I imagine my own sons. While I know that some are grifters, I don't want to withhold my help from someone who may be truly needy.

[buddysmellgood]

114. Where I live there are a number of agencies, churches, community groups

etc. where a person can get a meal and keep their dignity. Certainly moreso than by pan handling. Give your money to programs like that. You'll feed more people and support fewer addicts. Print up some cards with the address of these agencies and give the panhandlers these instead.

[tinfoilinfor2005]

117. Sure do

since I'm forced to give my hard earned bucks to Bush and his billionaire buddies, I'm pleased to give a few bucks to whomever I choose, and if I think a person is down on their luck I am happy to do it. I've had some bad years myself, and at times had to rely on the kindness of strangers.

[really-looney]

118. Sleep outside in Washington DC in the winter

I know that DC is not as cold as Boston, New York etc but if I had to sleep outside in the cold, snow and wet, I would wish for a drink to help me sleep at night. Spare me the alcohol makes you more susceptible to hypothermia. Out side on a metro grate if you are lucky give me a drink.

I don't care if they spend it on a bottle, it is usually small comfort. A couple bucks will not change their lives but it could change their night and sometimes that helps.

[American Tragedy]

120. Usually, unless they're obviously fakers.

My friends think I'm a hopeless sucker, but I just can't bear the sight of limping amputees and shivering old ladies, especially knowing that my upbringing was so comparatively privileged.

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

121. Yes, and have bought food for them too. n/t

[noonwitch]

123. Once in a while

But not that often. They are everywhere in Detroit. You can't go into a store in the city or pump gas without someone asking you for money.

[jeffrey_X]

124. Yes...

In the past I had a different commute/walk through Chicago. I passed the same man every day. I knew he had no opportunities, so I would give him about $5 per week. I got to know his name (Issac) and would say hi to him even on days when I didn't have any money.

I no longer walk that route anymore, but still give out money to homeless once in a while.

The thing that is more important (I think), is at least acknowledge them if you don't have anything. I look them in the eye and say "sorry, not today." I sometimes think this is appreciated almost as much as getting some spare change.