"Poem for Terri"

[DemoVet]

I found this at Balloon Juice, a moderate-conservative blog. Are the Bulwer-Lytton nominations still open?

POEM FOR TERRI

I will never marry Terri,
For she is already wed.
But I'm hoping I can carry
Her metal coffin when she's dead,

For to do so would please Jesus,
He who gives us breath and life.
He strives so very hard to please us!
Though she cannot be my wife,

We share a bond of Christian duty,
One transcending space and time.
No, I'll never stroke her booty,
And she'll never read this rhyme,

But in a year or two, or seven,
When my time on Earth has passed,
I'll meet sweet Terri up in Heaven,
And I'll kiss her face at last.

Copyright 2005 by Bibby Bibibbian. All rights reserved. This poem may be disseminated as long as it is not modified, and if I am given credit for its authorship. Praise Jesus Christ!

I almost needed CPR when I read "No, I'll never stroke her booty". Was that the only thing he could find that rhymed with "duty"?

Balloon Juice has some interesting reading these days...

http://www.balloon-juice.com/

[mermaid]

1. What A Sick Fuck!!

Jesus...would you want YOUR name attached to that abominable piece of "poetry?"

[Mz Pip]

2. What's that old punk term?

Gag me with a spoon.

Maybe in Heaven he'll get to poke her, too.

Mz Pip
:dem:

[Sparkly]

3. Is that satire?

"No, I'll never stroke her booty?" :eyes:

Much too weird.

[FreedomAngel82]

4. Weird indeed

:puke:

[crispini]

5. Oh. My. God.

:rofl:

[ultraist]

6. Those people are fucking insane.

That's so far over the edge it's hysterical. "Stroke her booty...Praise Jesus" LMAO!!!

[buckup]

7. *clears throat*

I am officially weirded out!

I hope nobody writes a poem involving my booty when I'm near death.

[Solly Mack]

8. That child needs some serious help....

Damn

[ultraist]

10. um...it may be an adult author

:scared:

[Solly Mack]

11. it's a colloquialism

:)

well, more an idiom

I edited out: "not mentally"

[ultraist]

18. Ah. I see. You didn't mean it literally.

I live in the South, I should have picked up on that. ;)

[Devlzown]

9. ROFLMAO!

:rofl: Never stroke her booty.:rofl:

[DemoVet]

12. I report, you deride

Yeah, I just thought it was bad poetry until I read the "booty" line, at which point I realized I was seeing some serious mental pathology. Wherever Terri goes when she passes, she'd better get a restraining order on this dude.

[Botany]

13. A poem for Bibby

As a child did you get ....
lack of oxygen?
to your brain.
Because to read your
verse without laughing
is a real strain.

Now how on earth did Kerry loose
to the likes of bush and you?
Have you ever tried drinking shampoo?

[Ilsa]

14. Almost final stanza....?

His mommy said he did not drink
He did not drink shampoo,
But like the neighbor's puppy dog,
he liked to eat his poo.

[FM Arouet666]

15. Laughing my ass off, but I would recommend a different ending.

"But in a year or two, or seven,
When my time on Earth has passed,
I'll meet sweet Terri up in Heaven,
And I'll finally get some ass."

Sick poem, is this guy serious? I do believe that my version is what this necrophile has in mind.

:rofl: :evilgrin:

On Edit, I ran a check at the U.S. Copyright office (http://www.copyright.gov/) to see if the Poem was actually listed. No Bibby, Bibibbian, or "Poem for Terri." A web search of the author listed a number of conservative blogs he has shared this little jewel with.

Check this one out

http://sayingnotothecultureofdeath.blogspirit.com/archive/2005/03/23/no_life_is_ever_useless.html

"Bibby, thank you for taking the time to share this beautiful poem. I hope others will see it and pass it around
Posted by: Maggie | 28/03/2005"

Note to Maggie, pull your head out of your ass.

[Horse with no Name]

16. Very close to necrophilia.

This guy needs to get a grip.
:freak:

[ariellyn]

17. Somethin's wrong with his medulla oblongata n/t