Childhood Innocence

[Lengsel]

Should children in the US be shielded from what goes on in other countries (like genocide in Rwanda, child soldiers in certain countries, child sex slaves, the realities of war . . .). I am debating on whether or not to let certain family members watch Hotel Rwanda. Also, I anticipate the movie will bring about other questions. Should children be allowed to keep a certain amount of innocence or should they know the truth about the world from an early age.

[Lerkfish]

1. individual discernment. All kids are different. Its part of parenting to

understand both the risks and the capability of the child to negotiate or withstand the information.

In other words, it depends on the child, their emotional maturity, etc.

Case by case basis.

[Throckmorton]

2. Each child is different

and each needs to be handled as an individual.

[XemaSab]

3. depends on the age of the kids

arbitrarily, I say 10's a good cut off point for telling kids about the horrors of the world. Younger than that I think they're likely to be upset about it without really being able to put it in context. Older than that and there's a lot of stuff they're going to learn about sooner or later like atomic warfare and the holocaust, and you may as well let them know how lucky they are to be Americans.

[SmokingJacket]

4. I believe in letting kids be ignorant of the harshest realities

at least as long as they're under 11 or 12 or so.

I know that the horrible things in the world are a tremendous burden to me as an adult -- but at least I can vote, write letters, donate money.

Kids are totally powerless to do anything about stuff like genocide, child murders, etc., so there's no point in spoiling their innocence.

They'll know all too well when they're older.

[MountainLaurel]

5. Age and maturity should be the central factors

If you feel your family members can handle the information on an intellectual level, whether the events happened in the U.S. or abroad should not matter.

To paraphrase a children's writer explaining why his books talked about poverty, racism, and injustice, kids need to read these books because there are other children who must live this every day.

[Ysolde]

6. I agree with all the other posters.

It depends on the individual child. I have shielded my about-to-be 9yr old daughter from almost every image concerning 9/11, the war, 7/7, Darfur, etc. that I can. She is incredibly empathic and does not handle anything or anyone hurting. My 4yr old son will be able to handle these type of things better and at a younger age. So, you really must know the sensitivities of each.

But, that doesn't mean that they can't be exposed to the truth of the world, even at an early age. It's just that a discussion in the safety of your home is much easier for a child to take than a movie or any video of such things. Even just hearing about it is less scary than seeing it (we listen to NPR for news).

[wli]

7. I remember being young

And children were the most vicious and sadistic people I ever had to deal with. The assumptions of "innocence" are not all they're cracked up to be. But apart from generalities like that, I myself am content to just stay away from the evil munchkins to avoid stirring up very bad memories.

[Horse with no Name]

8. I believe you should hold off on this conversation

They don't need to be burdened with the horrors of the world...let them be a kid as long as possible. The world will steal their innocence soon enough.
However...this is not to say that they aren't aware that kids in certain parts of the world go hungry, or that prejudice exists, etc.
This can be done without shattering their innocence.
Working in soup lines, giving toys to homeless children, etc. are all good ways to open their minds to world awareness without giving them nightmares.
One thing I always hate is how cruel children can be to those that are physically and mentally handicapped. From a very young age we started bringing a lady that was severely handicapped (Cerebral Palsy) home for some weekends and holidays to interact with our family so that the kids would learn that even if people were different, they all deserved the same respect.
Long story short...this woman was a casualty of Texas' closing down their state schools. She grew up in the state school (where my mom was a therapist). She was almost 40. Her mom was almost 80 and lived in another state and couldn't visit regularly anymore...so our family stepped in and "adopted" her. Took pictures to send to her mom. Then the state starting moving these folks out of the state schools into group homes and PROMISED the families that if it didn't work out, that the client WOULD be returned to the state school. After they removed the ones that required alot of care and placed them into group homes across the state, then the state relinquished care of the clients to the counties that housed them...thus absolving themselves of the deals they made with the families. Once the counties had them, then there wasn't any way that they could be returned to state custody.
THEN the worst part...once the counties were funded for brand new group homes and vans and equipment...they decided these people weren't high functioning enough and required more care than they chose to give them...so they were then sent to nursing homes. This is what all the families feared and why many were reluctant to allow them to leave the safety net of their home in the state schools. This is why the state promised that it would never happen. And it never happened while these clients were in the custody of the state, it happened when they were in the custody of the counties. Pretty sad?
Sorry for the hijack.