I will be SILENT NO MORE-and neither should you!

[liberalhistorian]

I am fortunate to be in a family that is, for the most part, liberal, and that gets along well with those in the family who aren't. But, like all families, there are members who disagree strongly with each other and who delight in pushing each other's buttons to get an argument going, especially during holiday gatherings.

My mom, stepdad, and I, and my uncle and his children, are particularly liberal and have never hid that. We've never forced it on anyone else, certainly, but we've never hid or denied our beliefs and principles. My stepsister and her husband, however, are howling repuke wingnuts who never miss a chance to shove it down our throats knowing perfectly well what we think.

Until now, we've all been very nice and polite, smiling and nodding and letting them rant and rave and whine about "libruls" and how teacher's unions are destroying public education and public education itself is socialist and corrupting minds (and my mom and stepdad are retired teachers, and two cousins are teachers!!!!!!!!!), how, even though they make a six-figure income, the "libruls" are taking it all away through taxes for "lazy people" (knowing that I was once on ADC!), how gays are contributing to the destruction and decay of the family and society, etc., etc., etc., ad nauseaum. But things are starting to get worse and more uncivil, it really does remind me of the beginnings of the Civil War when families were divided among themselves.

Well, I've had enough. I've had enough of being silent and polite at family gatherings, and in other similar situations (work, social situations, community gatherings, etc.) while the repukes and wingnuts are allowed to rant and rave on and on and on, while those like me are expected to be "civil" (i.e., sitting down and shutting up). And I've had enough of "polite" liberals who are afraid to say anything for fear of "causing trouble or discord" or coming off as uncivil or unsocial, or of giving the wrong impression, etc., etc. We simply CANNOT afford to do that anymore, the stakes are too high. This doesn't mean that we join the repukes and wingnuts in their uncivil rantings and ravings and mean-spirited arrogance and ignorance, by no means at all. It means that we begin to stick up for ourselves and our beliefs, and to counteract wingut arguments in a calm manner, but without taking any shit any longer.

We, also, have the right to be heard, just like the screaming wingnuts. And if they're hypocritical enough to start screaming about that, about our no longer sitting down and shutting up, no longer smiling and nodding during their ranting, FUCK THEM! I'm having a real semi-argument with my mom about that. She's always been, God love her, the conciliatory, peacemaker type, who's overly sensitive in social situations as far as people being uncomfortable, and she doesn't want to cause any "trouble." But I've had enough, and so has my uncle and cousins and stepdad. If we have to sit there and listen to that shit again, then we also have the right to speak up and be hear, and if my stepsister and her husband have a problem with that, that's just tough shit. They've been able to run their mouths off for years now, while we've all sat back and taken it. I'm not talking about screaming back at them or being equally uncivil, but simply speaking up for my beliefs as well and not being silent anymore.

I will be SILENT NO MORE, and I suggest that we'd all be in a better position if we all did the same. The situation is now critical, the stakes are too high, and we MUST stop being afraid to speak out for fear of causing trouble or discord, or being seen as "unsocial and uncivil."!

[Padraig18]

1. Silence = death

We MUST speak out! :)

[Pepperbelly]

2. Go. liberalhistoria go!

Never be silent in the face of ignorance or arrogance.

:toast: to your resolve.

[candy331]

5. Wait

till that 6 figure income is gone then they'll get the point. The I've got mines are headed for a rude awakening. The going up is good but the coming down is a bummer. And believe me many are coming down.

[liberalhistorian]

13. I'm sure many are, indeed, coming down, but watch them all

pull a ICF (it's Clinton's fault)! After all, to these people, the crucifixion of Christ and the Bubonic Plague are also Clinton's fault!

[janekat]

23. Where I live a lot of million dollar homes are being sold because

these multimillionaires in Naples Florida can no longer afford them. Will be interested in how many of them vote for Bush this time around. I don't have a whole lot of pity for the people who voted for Bush (which is probably most of them).

Don't feel too bad for them though - they're all moving from their $3 million dollar homes into $800,000 dollar homes and they still have their country club memberships. Wouldn't want any of you to lose sleep - LOL!!!

[liberalhistorian]

15. Thanks! I appreciate any

encouragement at all. That's one of the many things I love about DU, how we're able to encourage and build each other up!

[janekat]

34. This is helping me too... This is like therapy! n/t

[ixion]

3. every chance I get, LH....

really, once I get started, it's hard to stop.

We've certainly got our work cut out for us, though. The average person is still under the impression that * is a moral person who can keep them safe. It's going to be difficult to refute such an illogical, and worse, irrational position.

[liberalhistorian]

9. That's what particularly drives me crazy,

those false assumptions about the "morality" of the Boy King Impostor. Then, when you try to explain otherwise, they just say that it's sour grapes and that * would NEVER "defile" the Oval Office by getting it on with an intern, etc., etc.

[ixion]

43. while he may not defile it, as such, (because he's probably impotent)

he will, and he is, desecrating, denigrating, deconstructing, disrespecting the Oval Office, but for some reason, that's okay with these freeper folk. :crazy:

[liberalhistorian]

45. I know, and doesn't that just make you completely

nuts? I guess, to the winguts, if it doesn't have to do with that horrible S-E-X word, then it's okay. Unless you're Arnold Schwarzenegger, of course, who makes Clinton look like a choir boy!

[latebloomer]

4. More power to you!

Of course you should not sit and be silent. You're right, you don't have to stoop to their level and be a raving maniac (though I personally would have trouble controlling myself)-- but you should definitely speak your mind. Why should theirs be the only voices heard?

[spooky3]

7. what if you raised a zillion questions?

starting with "why would you bring up topics like this when you know very well that we don't agree with you?"

[liberalhistorian]

22. That is, indeed, a good question.

I don't know whether they're arrogant enough to think that we'll just sit back and take whatever they dish out, or whether they really don't care if they step on some very hurt toes!

[hail to the thief]

6. Absolutely Speak Out

To be silent is to be complacent with the current situation. Speak out often and loud! Certainly be polite when necessary and don't shove it down people's throat for no good reason, but when it's on it's on, we liberals have balls too! (Metaphorically speaking if you're a woman of course :) Just know you're not alone we're all in this together.

[janekat]

8. Go for It! I'm the ONLY Lib in my family and I get beat up all the time n/

[liberalhistorian]

11. Yikes, the ONLY lib?

Sheesh, and I thought I had it bad, lol! How do you manage to keep your sanity when you all get together?

[janekat]

20. I don't! We argue a lot... I only "pick" my battles. My mother hung

up on me when she thought Gore had won because I worked on the Gore Campaign. Then she called back and told me I was "disowned."

She's now gotten over it - sort of.

I'm the only Democrat on BOTH sides of the family. Where I grew up, just about everone was a Republican. I was so happy when I moved to Chicago and I was amongst Democrats for the first time in my life.

Have 1 sister-in-law who voted for Clinton though... She's the "black sheep" of HER family too!

[DuctapeFatwa]

10. Polarization and silence

The US is in a process of polarization at this time; on several fronts: as heretofore "affluent" jobs are outsourced, and the gap between rich and poor widens, we can expect and increasing circling of the wagons on the part of both haves and have-nots.

One of the less-discussed effects of 911 is an intensification of xenophobia and a stripping away of the veneer of "embracing diversity" among the voting class.

The Patriot Act mentality popular in the mainstream means that deciding "not to remain silent" may involve more than heated discussions with family members or scowls from the boss at work.

It is worth some hard soul-searching before making a decision, as the US is now a country where the regime has decreed that it will murder or disappear anyone it chooses at any time.

Although the Constitution has not been formally suspended, in practice it is in abeyance, and whether you live or die or rot in a cage forever is dependent on the whim of one man.

[liberalhistorian]

19. That's true, and that is, indeed, one of

the most frightening things of all about what's happening today! But there's a lot of truth in the saying that "All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good people to do nothing." History is loaded with examples of what happens when good people stay silent!

[DuctapeFatwa]

24. You're right, I mean make plans for dependents, etc first

If there are people who depend on you for food, housing, etc, it would be prudent to go ahead and plan what arrangements will be made for them to minimize impact in the event that your "speaking out" should cause you to be unable to fulfill your obligations.

You might talk with some immigrant families, especially those from nations with a large Muslim population, to get some ideas on things families can do to be prepared for contingencies...

[liberalhistorian]

28. That's a good idea.

I'm beyond saddened and infuriated that it's come to this, but we do have to be realistic, and be prepared as best we can.

[Jose Diablo]

12. You betcha!!!

Right wingnuts depend on 'silent' majority going along to get along.

The hell with 'em. Piss on them and the horse they rode in on.

Don't take any crap from them shits. I am finished with being a 'nice' guy.

It is far past time to make a stink.

[QC]

14. My own wingnut relatives are the ones who have been strangely silent

of late. They used to love to regurgitate hatr adio talking points, which once resulted in my nearly coming to blows with my brother-in-law, after telling him that he needed to go fuck himself.

But lately they don't have a word to say about politics. I'm thinking they might be feeling some buyer's remorse lately.

[liberalhistorian]

21. Whoa!

That must have been some family gathering when you said that to your brother-in-law! Is he still speaking to you?

Isn't it amazing and infuriating that winguts demand THEIR right to rant and rave all they want, but get angry when anyone not toeing their exact line says anything at all?

[QC]

38. We're speaking, but it took a while.

This happened on a family trip to the beach. My mom and dad drove up moments later and wondered why we were both sitting there with our jaws clenched and our faces pale.

Actually, my b-i-l is a good guy, except when it comes to politics. We are all very careful to avoid that topic at family get-togethers. My poor mother is always a nervous wreck at Thanksgiving ;-)

[liberalhistorian]

40. I would imagine she is a nervous wreck

before family gatherings! All it would take would be one simple remark, or one off-the-cuff comment, and the turkey would start flying!

[janekat]

29. Are you the one who's brother-in-law spit on his car?

Maybe we should have thread where we can all commiserate with each other. This board, the internet and few shows on TV are the only things that keep my sanity intact! I would think I was either the ONLY sane person in an insane world OR even worse, vice-versa.

[liberalhistorian]

32. Same here!

I HAVE to be on DU for at least an hour a day, or I'll go crazy! That even includes sneaking some time in at work (sshhhhh, you're not supposed to know that)!

I'm sure a thread or an area where we could commiserate about situations like this would be very much needed!

[QC]

39. That must have been someone else.

[Oracle]

16. Yes, you hit it right on the head, polite liberals are no better than...

spinless say nothing Democrats or fucking moerates sitting on the fence waiting for the wind to blow to see what side of the fence they will fall on to.

Fucking, CHEERS to you liberalhistorian!

[XanaDUer]

17. Same thing happened to me

and the wingnut relative went ballistic and cut off contact. Oh, well.

It felt good to be silent no longer. How come we have to listen to that RW swill and are "rude" if we say something back, even in a non-rude way? :shrug:

[liberalhistorian]

25. That's my point, exactly!

Why should we have to listen to that, and then be expected to just sit down and shut up?

[populistmom]

18. Speak up!

I'e maaged to piss a few people off here and there, but at least I got them thinking and can be at peace with myself for saying something.

[Cha]

26. I was amazed at what the wingnuts were allowed to get away

with on cabal news just because of their loud mouths..I eventually had to tune it out because who wants to listen to the same ol' same ol' lies time after time.

IMO, you and your "Liberal" family are due past Years of speaking your mind! I imagine you have quite a bit bottled up over time.

Oh to be a spider on the wall the next time the wingers start their "ranting" and they get treated to a civil discourse instead of the usual "smiling and nodding"! }(

[greekspeak]

27. I have pretty well cut off contact with my most wing-nut family

My uncle and his vulgar neo-con politics and his self-righteous ultra-fundamentalist religious outlook sours my stomach. He is a cheapskate and a bigot who finds glee in alienating from him anyone who does not share his skewed ideas about the human experience. I think that the last time I had contact with him was at my stepbrother's wedding. This joyous event was held in a Baptist church, and he spent the entire time he was in the building bitching at how evil Baptists are. Yes...Baptists are evil too. That would include his daughter, who is a calvinist baptist.

I do well when I avoid talking politics with my father, who is the same way as my uncle, but without the religious fanatacism. Actually, my father is more of an "old gaurd," non-neocon republican, but he tends to get behind the circled wagons to defend wing-nut behavior.

[liberalhistorian]

30. It definitely sounds like you're better

off without having your uncle in your life. At least your father isn't too much like that, I hope you're able to maintain a relationship with him.

[janekat]

31. Wow! Even Baptists are evil. What religion are they? n/t

[prolesunited]

33. I'm never silent

So, I want to warn you to be prepared for the repercussions. Most of my family is no longer talking to me. It's not that they are mean to me, they just don't bother calling me anymore.

As far as my co-workers go, they avoid me as well. I'm either too depressing or what I say scares them too much.

I'm never mean or ugly or rude in what I say, but people really seem to want to live in their comfort zones. Truth can be isolating, so just be ready for the results.

However, I applaud your decision. We must be brave and have courage in these trying times. It's the only way change can happen. My best to you.

[liberalhistorian]

44. Good for you for sticking up for yourself and

your beliefs no matter what! I'm pretty lucky in that I'm in a fairly decent workplace and my family's mostly liberal, even one of my best friends, a conservative, is still close to me (and suffering from "buyer's remorse" right now, as far as Chimpy is concerned). So I imagine it would be a lot harder if I didn't have that kind of support, and I'm really sorry you have to deal with that. I know it has to be really hard and lonely, but you do have us here and we all love ya and are proud of you!

[Cheswick2.0]

35. "Why are you talking that way about me? I am a liberal"

That is how I would I would start. Tell them they have been insulting you for years when they know you are a liberal and ask them why they would treat you that way. Then start questioning everything they say. Ask for proof, ask them if they "heard that from Rush"?
You go LH and you are right, it is time for all of us to fight back.

[gristy]

36. More and more these days, I talk politics with anyone

I'll talk with the supermarket checkout cashier, I'll talk with the rental-car guy who picked me up at the auto-dealer (something happened to my gear shift), I'll talk with a friend over lunch.

I run into very few wingnuts. I think my neighbor is one. I don't want to talk to him. Not about politics anyways. But there are TONS of people who don't have any particular passion one way or the other. THOSE are the folks that we need to reach and that we can reach.

[liberalhistorian]

41. That's an excellent point,

most people are fairly neutral or apathetic politically, and they are the ones we do, indeed, need to reach. We're certainly not going to convert the wingnuts anymore than they're going to convert us (the day a wingnut converts me is the day I either kill myself or check myself into a psychiatric hospital!), so the vast middle-ground is who we need to focus on.

[pansypoo53219]

37. this fire-breeathing Dem hasn't SHUT UP

since the twit got nominated. 9/11 made it worse.

[liberalhistorian]

42. Good for you!

Do you have any friends or family left, lol!

[Room101]

46. FDR meant well when he said ...

"We have nothing to fear but fear itself"
But in this Project for a New American Century we have nothing to fear but the fear mongers themselves.

Good for you, I do the same I have no fear!

[ewagner]

47. Good for you!

I've seen a lot of your posts, you're more than capable of defending and articulating your positions. Go for it.

Tell your Mom that you know how to disagree without being disagreeable. That should make her feel better.

:toast:

oh, yeah, join me in a :beer:

[Lydia Leftcoast]

48. Remember, the only way to stop bullies

is to stand up to them. And it sounds like your relatives are conversational bullies.

I would agree with the suggestion of calmly asking, "Why do you think that? What is your source for that belief? What is your definition of liberal/sinful/socialist/anti-Christian/unpatriotic? How many African-Americans/Latinos/Arabs/Asians/gay persons/atheists/ have you personally encountered? What would happen in real life if that policy were implemented? Isn't there another way to interpret that anecdotal evidence?" etc. etc.

[Arianrhod]

49. I would only mildly suggest

that you not respond to them in kind. Let them rant and rave; for your part, be calm, dispassionate, and stick to the facts. Getting into a screaming match will only set up their defenses and prevent them from hearing you. OTOH, remaining rational will demonstrate that you have the truth on your side--something that will stop their argument in mid-sentence.

It's actually kind of fun to watch people flounder when they cannot refute your statements. :)

[Hogarth]

50. I agree ...

and well-said.

[depakid]

51. You said it when you said you were fortunate

that your family is, for the most part, liberal- you don't know how lucky you are.

Most of my family are conservative and the younger ones are loudmouths, especially after a few beers or glasses of wine. They don't listen, they won't admit when they have their facts wrong and they tend to make emotional rather than rational arguments. About the only way to deal with them is through humor- or through tranquilizers.