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Men - Where's your push for a male birth control pill?

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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:20 PM
Original message
Men - Where's your push for a male birth control pill?
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 01:46 PM by Book Lover
I asked this in the GD child support thread, which is sinking rapidly, so I though I'd ask it solo. How much desire is there for a male BC pill? If it were available and as safe as the female pill, would you take it? Would you be willing to start or help a campaign to make the R&D happen faster?
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:22 PM
Response to Original message
1. I'd take it, absolutely.
As far as starting a campaign to get one? No, I don't do that for any product. I don't see why I have to or why this is important to you that I should.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:23 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Vash, it was just a question
I'm not that emotionally involved.
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:32 PM
Response to Reply #2
9. Judging from your other comments in this thread alone,
I find that quite hard to believe.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:33 PM
Response to Reply #9
10. Believe as you like
This question was motived by curiosity.
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Bethany Rockafella Donating Member (916 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:25 PM
Response to Original message
3. That'll be the day!
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:29 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. So you think American men just
won't take it, if available? My thinking is that if it were marketed in a way that told men it would give them control over when they become a father, men would go for it.
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smirkymonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:34 PM
Response to Reply #7
11. Well, once abortion becomes illegal and men have to start paying
child support for the result of every unplanned pregnancy, I think you will see an increased interest in male contraceptive.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:36 PM
Response to Reply #11
15. Men are compelled to do that now
And were compelled to do that when Enovid came on the market before abortion was decriminalized.
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grumpy old fart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:48 PM
Response to Reply #7
29. There are easier ways, and this wouldn't convince any sane woman..........
that she is safe from impregnation. Why would she believe you?
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:20 PM
Response to Reply #29
59. it's not an either or thing
it's about an sexually active individual having active control over thier future. I've known plenty of men who had no intention of having children when they did, but made the very bad mistake of trusting that the women they were sleeping with were taking care of the birth control. Now some of them are stuck paying child support for years. These guys weren't 'bad' or stupid, just young and careless. They didn't 'deserve' having their lives screwed up any more than a woman who doesn't want to have children.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:27 PM
Response to Original message
4. We already have one, but it's not a pill.
It's called "beer."
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edbermac Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:28 PM
Response to Original message
5. Why? Men don't give birth the last time I checked...
:silly:
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Scout Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:42 PM
Response to Reply #5
20. so of course they wouldn't be at ALL interested in trying
to prevent an unwanted pregnancy, of course!

Then they wouldn't be able to continue blaming the women, saying "she lied when she said she was on the pill."

Gotta be able to use those whiny excuses to avoid taking responsibility for their own sexual actions.
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edbermac Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:46 PM
Response to Reply #20
26. I am most certainly not 'not interested' in unwanted pregnancies
That's what condoms are for. And if some guy whines about some woman lying about being on the pill when she's not, then they are BOTH to blame...
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:12 PM
Response to Reply #26
46. Condoms weren't designed to prevent pregnancy
They were invented to prevent the spread of disease.
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GumboYaYa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:29 PM
Response to Original message
6. There is one that is very close to being on the market right now.
Personally I hate being tied to the pharamceutical industry and would most likely not take it, but I also do not expect my wife to take the pill either (and she does not).

I would gladly get a vasectomy and plan on doing so soon.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:31 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. So you're not in the market for it
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 01:34 PM by Book Lover
But you indicate you are a man: do you think American men just aren't interested in taking a pill every day? Is it that "control of fertility" isn;t something men are taught to think about?

on edit: reworded the question.
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BoardExplode Donating Member (32 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:35 PM
Response to Reply #8
14. I don't think American men are interested in shooting blanks
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 01:37 PM by BoardExplode
But maybe that's just me
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:38 PM
Response to Reply #14
17. Thanks
It's an interesting contradiction, though: "I want to have fertile come, but I don't want the woman I'm screwing to get pregnant."
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BoardExplode Donating Member (32 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:42 PM
Response to Reply #17
21. The risk of pregnancy would be way too high just using such a pill
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 01:44 PM by BoardExplode
Men still use condoms even with women who use birth control
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Scout Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:43 PM
Response to Reply #17
24. hee hee! love it!
great post!

"I want to have fertile come, but I don't want the woman I'm screwing to get pregnant."
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GumboYaYa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:57 PM
Response to Reply #8
50. I can only speak for myself, not all American men,
but it has nothing to do with "control of fertility" or some implied sexism as you seem to be suggesting. Neither me nor my wife want to pump our bodies full of hormones and other chemicals. We practice birth control by other means that we mutually agreed on and discussed, like mature adults. If by chance that fails, we are prepared to have another child and would be happy about it.

I am perfectly willing to control my fertility through a vasectomy, but don't want to take drugs to achieve that. I stopped taking my allergy and asthma medicine a few years back for the same reason. Now I use natural methods to control my allergies and feel much better.

The right answer does not always come in the form of a pill.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:59 PM
Response to Reply #50
51. I reworded the question to avoid exactly this
I am trying very hard to keep any anti-men sentiment out of this conversation. I am not anti-man, nor do I assume that men are ravenous sex machines devoted to getting it in as many women as possible.

Thank you for sharing with me your reasons; that's all I was asking after.
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Akoto Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:34 PM
Response to Original message
12. Not to sound dense, but ...
Is that not what condoms are for, disease prevention aside? I'm sure there'd be some who'd take such a pill, but hell, there are plenty of men who (sadly) won't even use what's available now.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:37 PM
Response to Reply #12
16. But condoms interfere with
the pleasure of the sex act in a way the female pill doesn't. And I can understand that POV.
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Beaver Tail Donating Member (903 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:34 PM
Response to Original message
13. I thought they were working ojn one BUT
atm it makes 1 in every 5 men sterile
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:40 PM
Response to Reply #13
18. I don't know the particulars
and hadn't heard that part of the study. I'll have to check that out.
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Beaver Tail Donating Member (903 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:52 PM
Response to Reply #18
33. My Information may be old, not sure
Havent been watching it recently.
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Spinzonner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:41 PM
Response to Original message
19. Hmm, female condoms never much went anywhere, did they

I think each gender has developed certain expectation of the opposite gender and certain ingrained habits of their own that will be difficult to overcome.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:45 PM
Response to Reply #19
25. Again, because of the pleasure issue
I never used one, but I've seen them; they look silly and awkward to use. Male condoms are easier to deal with.

And yes, judging just from these few responses, it looks like expectations, even from this self-selected group of liberals, will be hard to overcome.
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grumpy old fart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:42 PM
Response to Original message
22. What woman is going to believe you when you claim to have taken it?
I mean, any sane woman is still gonna demand a condom. So what's the use?
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gkhouston Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #22
27. for casual sexual encounters, I agree.
But if you're in a long-term relationship and your partner can't take the Pill, that might be a situation where a male version of the Pill would come in handy.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #22
28. Well, do you believe a woman when
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 01:50 PM by Book Lover
she tells you that she's on the pill? My thinking is that it gives the man *some* measure of control over his fertility and that men would want that.
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grumpy old fart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:50 PM
Response to Reply #28
31. Of course I don't trust them. Pull out or suffer the consequences dude.
It's the only sane thing to do.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #31
34. And I'm just asking if a pill
would give a man greater peace of mind than pulling out or using a condom.
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Scout Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:58 PM
Original message
if you're relying on the "pull out dude" method to avoid
consequences, you are more likely to HAVE consequences than not.

Any woman who let's you use that method without herself being on the pill is insane.
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grumpy old fart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:02 PM
Response to Original message
43. I agree.......eom
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:28 PM
Response to Reply #22
61. But the reverse is true too
If I were a man, having sex with someone I'm not in a committed relationship with and/or I didn't want to father children with, I'd want to know *I* was protected as well.

The assumption that birth control is just to protect women is kind of a dated one.
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BiggJawn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:43 PM
Response to Original message
23. Personally? No.
Would I take it? Why?
Do I think it's a good idea? Yes I do, if not for me, then for others.

BTW, the phrase "Deadbeat Dad" is as offensive to me as the word "N*****".

Oh, WHY wouldn't I take it, you wonder?
Because I'm not inclined to have sex with fertile people. Happens as you get older, unless you're getting a "trophy" young enough to be your daughter...
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:49 PM
Response to Reply #23
30. My apologies
I edited the post to remove the offensive words.
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BiggJawn Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:51 PM
Response to Reply #30
32. Thank you!
"Deadbeat PARENTS", I have no problem with, because I think they are deadbeats. Just tired of seeing the men catch all the shit.
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charlie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:54 PM
Response to Original message
35. Don't need it
Got my nuts clipped after my son was born. It's a much simpler, safer procedure than tubal ligation. Only cost me a day from work, and maybe 3-4 days of walking like Groucho. If you're done making babies, it's the way to go.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:59 PM
Response to Reply #35
39. To me it seems like
men would want more than the two options, though: become sterile through tubal ligation or use a condom. The language women are exposed to when talking about birth control usually include the words "safe" and "reversible", which describes condoms of course, but condoms have their own problems.
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hunter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:55 PM
Response to Original message
36. This is strictly a problem of biology.
Biochemically, it is much more difficult to interfere with the production of sperm in males than it is to interfere with the delicate mechanisms of conception and pregnancy in females.

Making sperm is simple, making a baby is complicated.

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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:02 PM
Response to Reply #36
41. But it is being studied
I'm trying to understand if men are interested in taking it, though.
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Metta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:56 PM
Response to Original message
37.  Vasectomy.
As far as contreception goes, it appears to be at least as safe as the pill and can be made irreversible.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:02 PM
Response to Reply #37
42. Um, do you mean reversible? (nm)
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Metta Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 07:54 PM
Response to Reply #42
55. Actually, both.
I've never heard of anyone going into it with the intention of reversing it although I'm unfamiliar with the literature. I know they can be made irreversible and I know that some doctors claim they can reverse them.
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TlalocW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 01:58 PM
Response to Original message
38. HELL, NO, I WOULDN'T TAKE IT!
But that's because I got a vasectomy just over 3 years ago. :)

TlalocW
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:01 PM
Response to Reply #38
40. Lots of guys here seem to be in your position
I have to say I'm kinda surprised. I really had no idea so many fellas had vasectomies. Again, though, this is a self-selected group in this thread...
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gkhouston Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:06 PM
Response to Reply #40
44. they're lying
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 02:08 PM by gkhouston
they're just waiting for their chance to get us all knocked up. ;-)

Seriously, if your baby-making days are over, far better to go with a one-time physical intervention than fiddle with your hormones.
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:36 PM
Response to Reply #44
63. I got my tubes tied when I was 21
I've never regretted once - AND it's been a real boon for my sex life. Sex without fear/worry is a marvelous thing. (take that tight-assed fundamentalists! i'm SEX POSITIVE!)
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TlalocW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 07:23 PM
Response to Reply #40
52. And surprisingly it wasn't too difficult to get one
Even though I don't have kids. I got a couple of amazed question from the nurse when I went to see the doctor when she asked how many I already had. "You don't have ANY kids, but you want a vasectomy?" I had heard horror stories about a few guys being turned down because they hadn't spawned (of course, there are more stories about childfree women seeking tubals being turned down), but the doctor was cool about it. Whole visit with him was, "So you want to get snipped. What do I need to sign. Here it is. Here ya go."

TlalocW
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noamnety Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
45. I doubt men are all that interested
in taking medication that screws up the way their body is supposed to work. There would be a lot of concern over side effects and long term health risks.

(These are acceptable for women, however.)
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BoardExplode Donating Member (32 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:14 PM
Response to Reply #45
47. Steroid users don't seem to care
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Dora Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #45
49. Unless it screws their body into a big erection
Now that's medicine worth taking!
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kodi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 02:15 PM
Response to Original message
48. where? generally speaking, its called seven plus years of marriage
.
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DireStrike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 07:33 PM
Response to Original message
53. Would you trust a man who said he was on the pill?
Men don't get pregnant... due to the dynamics of the situation a female BC pill is more useful.

Still, I don't understand why there isn't such a pill. It seems like if it would sell at all, the drug companies would make it. Where is it?
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Scout Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 07:41 PM
Response to Reply #53
54. if we were married, yes
if were in long-term, stable relationship, yes.

if I haven't known him long enough to stop using condoms to prevent disease, no I wouldn't.

once we didn't need to use condoms anymore then yes, I'd trust him. If I couldn't trust him, then I shouldn't be fucking him.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:12 PM
Response to Reply #53
56. But it's not about me
This is all about the man protecting himself.

Would *I* trust a man who claims to be on the male pill? Gee, um, I guess the honest answer would have to be, unless I have good reason to think otherwise, no. But aren't men in the same situation?
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MrSlayer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:17 PM
Response to Original message
57. I don't think there is any desire for it.
The subject has never come up when I'm at work or out with the boys. I wouldn't take it because I don't need it, my wife has her tubes tied. And no I wouldn't be willing to start a campaign for it because I couldn't care less about it.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:18 PM
Response to Reply #57
58. Yeah, that seems to be the consensus
Thanks for your reply!
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MrSlayer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #58
60. No problem.
Tis what I'm here for.
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David Zephyr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:29 PM
Response to Original message
62. Zephyr: Guys should voluntarily have vasectomies 'til ready to procreate
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 08:30 PM by David Zephyr
The vasectomy is reversible.

Parents of young males (16 +) should recommend this and it should be taught in schools.

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mixedview Donating Member (206 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:40 PM
Response to Original message
64. As a man and a libertarian, I strongly believe in reproductive rights
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 08:47 PM by mixedview
for all.

I've always wondered why we don't have a birth control pill - quite frankly it pisses me off that we don't. Condoms have a pretty high failure rate and are impractical in a relationship.

I believe in procreational autonomy for both genders.

Women should have the right to an abortion, and men should have the right to abort their paternity (i.e. Choice for Men). Both genders should have effective birth control available to them.

I believe each individual is responsible for their own birth control.

I believe no individual should be forced into parenthood/economic
servitude.

I believe sex is not an agreement to parenthood.

I believe a man has no say in whether or not a woman carries the fetus to term, and a woman has no say in whether or not the man carries the burden of fatherhood.

This is the only way if we truly believe in liberty for all citizens. Anything else is hypocrisy.
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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:58 PM
Response to Reply #64
66. Nope
Children are entitled to support from both parents. Anything else is damning millions more children to poverty, children who had nothing to do with the circumstances to which they were born. Not acceptable. Both adults made the baby. Both adults are responsible.

Which is exactly why more men should be pushing for more choices for birth control. I'm all for a male pill. I think it would be a great idea.
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mixedview Donating Member (206 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:06 PM
Response to Reply #66
71. Independent women making independent choices should not expect men
to be responsible for those choices.

With rights come responsibilities.

A man has no say whether or not the fetus becomes a baby - he has no say whether the child comes into this world or not. And that's the way it should be.

I cannot be responsible for something that is 100% your choice.

Sex is not an agreement to parenthood.

And "save the children" rhetoric is always a guise for moralistic authoritarian agendas - whether it comes from the paternalist right or the maternalist left.
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:09 PM
Response to Reply #71
73. "Children are the crowbar of Fascism"
a bumper sticker some friends were going to make.
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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:15 PM
Response to Reply #71
75. And children should not be expected to be punished
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 09:15 PM by Pithlet
for the actions of the people who created them. It isn't their fault.

As far as your last comment: What a stupid thing to say. Don't give me that bullshit about materialistic left. Society shouldn't have to take care of your kid for you. You had the child. You consented to the sex. You therefore have the responsibility for the child if it comes into this world, man or woman. Foisting that child off on the state or other people is childish. It's not the child's fault or the society that will have to take care of him in your place just because you had sex and a child happened and you don't feel you should be responsible.

A woman can have an abortion, but a woman can't give birth and then abandon the child and get let off the hook for support. No parent, man or woman, should have the ability to do so. When a woman chooses to terminate the pregnancy, no child results, and no child left to founder in poverty. If a man is allowed to terminate his rights, that leaves a child for someone else to have to support.
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:07 PM
Response to Reply #64
72. I agree with you
I didn't realize there was any organization for this issue.

It's very complex and I don't think there is really an easy answer. I have always thought that it is as unfair for a man to be forced to support an unwanted pregancy as it is to force a woman to bear an unwanted pregancy. The attitude that I see toward men in this situation seems very flipant.
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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:18 PM
Response to Reply #72
77. When a woman terminates a pregnancy, no child results
So, when she made the choice not to have a child, there isn't a child out there left for someone else to take up the slack. If a man is allowed to just "terminate" his parental rights, that leaves a child hanging. If men are just allowed to decide they don't want to be responsible for a child that as an adult engaging in consensual sex they helped create, then millions more children will be left in poverty. And that affects us all.
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:28 PM
Response to Reply #77
82. I was pregnant twice
both times using birth control. I was in a semi-casual relationship with the person(s) with whom I got pregnant. I NEVER expected them to pay for raising a child they didn't intend to have, nor were they in a financial position to do so. It would have seriously messed up their lives if they had been forced to do so. I also wasn't in a financial (or otherwise) position to raise children.

Bottom line for me was that it was my decision. If I wanted to carry out the pregnancy to term AND not adopt the child, then I felt like it was my - and mine alone- responsibility. But then I value personal responsibility.

Still, it's a very complex issue with no easy answers.

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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:36 PM
Response to Reply #82
83. I have also been pregnant multiple times.
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 09:36 PM by Pithlet
It doesn't matter what you expected of them. If you had had a child, it is the child entitled to the support both from you and the man.

I think too many people are looking at child support as a punitive matter. "It will ruin their lives. They can't afford it". Child support is for the child, not to punish or ruin either parent. In a longstanding economy that usually requires the income of both parents to raise a child, a child cannot afford to lose the support of either one just because that adult thought they shouldn't have to, and some group somewhere backs them up.

It is your decision whether to continue your pregnancy, absolutely, because it is your body. But the fact that women have a choice doesn't change the fact that children need and require the support of both parents. Regardless of what ever decisions either adult made, he/she is entitled to the support from both of them.
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Matariki Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 02:07 AM
Response to Reply #83
84. the problem i have with this
is that the woman in the situation essentially gets to decide the man's fate, as well as the child's. don't get me wrong, i don't entirely disagree with what you are saying. i just don't think it's an issue with a pat, simple answer.

the woman who doesn't want to raise a child can put it up for adoption. how would you feel if the man who didn't want to raise it could put it up for adoption if the woman couldn't support the child on her own? a very ugly alternative.

child support IS a punitive matter when someone is making minimum wage and living in a city where minimum wage doesn't even cover their own expenses much less another person's. I know people in this situation and it HAS ruined their lives. All the people I know who this happened to were in there late teens or early twenties. They are in a complete bind that prevents them from getting into a career path with any future, prevents them from getting further education, they will NEVER catch up.

Like I keep saying, it's just not simple.
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Niccolo_Macchiavelli Donating Member (641 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 02:52 AM
Response to Reply #77
85. the intent of relinquishing (male) parenthood
should of course be stated before the child is carried to terms, as in that the woman can decide to raise it on her own or abort.

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sandnsea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 03:16 AM
Response to Reply #64
88. No birth control is 100%
That's the hard cold fact. Sex=babies. If you don't want to risk a baby, don't have sex.
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mixedview Donating Member (206 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 04:23 AM
Response to Reply #88
89. that's the pro-life argument against women
"if you don't want a baby, don't have sex."

I disagree.

People - men and women - should have the right to have sex and enjoy their lives without being forced into parenthood.

Currently women have this right.

Currently, men do not.

It has yet to be challenged in the Supreme Court. One day soon, it will be, under the 14th Amendment's equal protection clause.
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sandnsea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 10:21 AM
Response to Reply #89
96. Thems the breaks
You know the reality. If you have sex, be prepared to accept the consequences which is sometimes a baby. No, you don't have the medical risks of a pregnancy so, no, it isn't your choice whether you continue one or not. Just the reality of it.
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Fescue4u Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:41 PM
Response to Original message
65. Why? I cant get pregnant !


(ducking!)


Just kidding.
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youthere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:59 PM
Response to Original message
67. What good would it do?
Pharmacists would refuse to fill the prescription.:sarcasm:
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More Than A Feeling Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:00 PM
Response to Original message
68. Sure, I'd take it.
I'll do whatever I can to prevent any unwanted pregnancies that I might cause.
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BuyingThyme Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:02 PM
Response to Original message
69. We would make it into a birth-control beer
and we'd all drink it.

This is the answer to most guys' greatest fears.
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burythehatchet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:05 PM
Response to Original message
70. My tadpoles cannot be stopped!!!!
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 11:59 AM
Response to Reply #70
98. By the way, this is
my favorite snarky answer :-)
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Demonaut Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:13 PM
Response to Original message
74. inaheartbeat, ask my HMO years ago if one was in development
that was 6 years ago, still nothing
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Bluebear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:17 PM
Response to Original message
76. "Don't worry, baby, it's fine, I'm on the male birth control pill"
Careful what you wish for!
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Pithlet Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:21 PM
Response to Reply #76
79. But the man himself will know.
I don't think a man can expect that a woman will take their word for it, if we're talking about casual relationships, here. But he himself will have a peace of mind, and he'll be able to take more direct control of his own fertility. As a woman, if I were still in the singles scene, I wouldn't mind the responsibility spread a little more evenly. I'd still take the pill myself, of course, but knowing that men out there were starting to take control of their own end isn't such a bad thing.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 06:31 AM
Response to Reply #79
90. That's the key to the whole issue.
If a man takes BC pills, he is virtually eliminating the chance of unwanted fatherhood. It is completely in his control, which you would think he'd want. He protects himself from the lying women, the ones who want to trap him, the ones who would continue a pregnancy against his wishes, etc. It would be one way for a man to take 100% control over HIS fertility.

Of course the woman may or may not trust him - no matter, she needs to be taking complete control over her fertility.

Can't understand why any man, who does not want to be a father, would resist doing this. :shrug:
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Scout Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 06:41 AM
Response to Reply #90
91. Brava! Bravissima!
:toast: :yourock: :applause:

:woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo: :woohoo:



c'mon guys, how can you possibly disagree with the logic in Bunny's post?

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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 06:48 AM
Response to Reply #91
92. It is pretty logical, isn't it?
You don't want to be a father, take 100% control over your own fertility. Don't worry about what the woman may be doing to control hers, take control of yours. Then you can't be tricked, trapped, lied to, and doomed to 18 years of child support payments. Seems pretty easy to me.
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Lars39 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:26 PM
Response to Reply #76
81. If people approached birth control as layers, it would just be one
more precaution that just might hold up in case one of the others fail. I'm seeing a lot of "it doesn't affect me". Do these men not have any children, or do they not realize the importance of birth control in a society? :shrug:
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:20 PM
Response to Original message
78. out of curiosity, I wonder how a male bc would work
do you think it would be something that would stop the production of sperm or something that would, I don't know, weaken the sperm making it unable to penetrate the egg?

I wonder what the side effects would be. To be fair, it should have the potential side effect of adding 5 lbs to their hips. :D

My husband would take it if it were safe and available.
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sniffa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 09:23 PM
Response to Original message
80. if others want it, go for it
Let me know when they make the std-piLL too.
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Niccolo_Macchiavelli Donating Member (641 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 03:00 AM
Response to Original message
86. i wouldn't take it.
i refuse to take any medication i do not absolutely use to SURVIVE. No pills for all and everything. Not even taking anti-allergica.

So this would be Thyroid substitutest. I'm very happy to use condoms though which protects from STD's as well. Wouldn't expect SO to take a pill or medication i wouldn't take myself.
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cynatnite Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 03:11 AM
Response to Original message
87. Many men still believe birth control is the woman's responsibility n/t
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ProfessorGAC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 06:52 AM
Response to Original message
93. Just A Question
Would the ladies out there believe a guy who says he takes that pill? Even if it were 100% effective, wouldn't most women want to protect themselves anyway? In our younger days, i would have taken one that worked for my wife's sake. But, on less long term relationships, would the ladies really be trusting enough?
The Professor
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Scout Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 07:06 AM
Response to Reply #93
94. see my post #54 n/t
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 11:59 AM
Response to Reply #93
97. It's not about us women; it's about you men
and you covering your own ass (if you will). I wrote upthread that my honest answer was no, I wouldn't believe a man who said he was on the pill, but after further thought, I have to change that. If I'm having sex with him, I trust him, and I would know if he were or not. Then again, I'm not a casual person.
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ProfessorGAC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 12:05 PM
Response to Reply #97
99. Fair Enough
I just don't know that i would be that trusting. My wife and i wanted kids so we didn't have to worry about whether things were "working". We couldn't have them, we found after a long while, but that didn't impact the decisions we made very early.

I'm just not sure that we have quite the social strictures you place on yourself. You're not a casual person. Lots of folks are pretty casual about sex. Both men and women. I don't think copious trust and sex have to go together for many folks.

I'm a guy and i don't think most of us are trustworthy enough when it comes to that responsibility.

Like i said, if my wife and i were still of childbearing age, and we didn't want kids, i'd take the male birth control pill. So, i'm not objecting to the idea. I just think that given the consequences of pregnancy, and the possiblity that the man can just run away from it (even if financially liable), it's not something most women would trust.

Too many snakes in that pond.
The Professor
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 12:25 PM
Response to Reply #99
100. And I understand that
The point of this thread (if you'll forgive the corporate phrase) was to explore the potential market - American men. It seems a pretty small proportion of guys here are interested. I will admit that I'm having a gard time with this though. Only a few men objected on the basis that it might damage a man's health (which I find fascinating - women are obviously OK with that risk) and most objected because they felt no woman would believe them that they were on the male pill, despite the protection it would give the man.
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ProfessorGAC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 12:31 PM
Response to Reply #100
101. Well, The Health Thing Is A Pretty Lame Excuse
There seems little logic to worrying about one gender's health over another. My concern is whether there is a market for such a product if WOMEN wouldn't trust it. I don't think it's a matter of whether just men would want and use it. The big pharma people would be concerned over whether female partners would trust it. If they don't, you could forget about selling it.

Ever seen the Levitra commercials. The women all have dreamy smiles on their faces, don't they. The medicine is for men, but they're clearly trying to market to women as well.

So, methinks your pursuit of market potential should not be limited to men. If women in this country wouldn't trust it, there is no market, no matter what men think.
The Professor
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sendero Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 07:21 AM
Response to Original message
95. I doubt it would be ..
... that difficult to make a male pill. The trick would be to shut down sperm production without shutting down testosterone production.

As long as they could do it without too many side effects, I believe a male pill would be a very popular contraceptive.

Most men do not want to accidently create children, we prefer to do it on purpose :)
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nolabels Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 12:41 PM
Response to Original message
102. Oh, it's so un-manly, shootin blanks and everything ya know
I think it's a a good idea myself. That still would leave that dreaded STVD issue though.


Multi-Purpose Disposable Workwear
http://www.nybsafety.com/Chemical%20Working%20Clothing.htm
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dissent1977 Donating Member (795 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 12:47 PM
Response to Original message
103. I would, but ONLY if it were thoroughly proven to be safe
I would not take it the moment it was introduced to the market, because the pharmaceutical industry has released so many unsafe drugs in the past. The female birth control pill has been on the market so long that it is unlikely to turn up any unexpected dangers. I would want to wait at least three years after the pill's release before I started on it because I do not want to be a guneia pig.
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LiberalStudent Donating Member (1 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-05-05 12:48 PM
Response to Original message
104. a male pill would be great
I would absolutely love it if a male birth control pill was around. I'd take it in a heartbeat. As a college student, I've made enough bad, drunken decisions that knowing I was temporarily infertile would be a relief. From talking to other guys my age, I think that's a fairly common attitude - frankly, none of us are mature enough to make it to class on time every day, so we're certainly not mature enough to have kids. I think the male pill would be huge in our demographic, even if it was only to supplement other forms of birth control rather than to replace them.
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