Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:50 PM
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Help! I just found out the person I started dating is a Bush supporter |
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This really bothers me. This woman is great in so many ways and I really started liking her then last night I brought up Bush to see where she stood. She went from being sweet and kind hearted to 'Clintons penis this and Clintons penis that', it took all my strength to stop from just getting up and leaving. She is a single mom, doesnt make great money, so I told her that her supporting Bush was like a chicken supporting Colonel Sanders and that just set her off more.
So I'm not sure what to do here, in the past I have broken off business relations with people that support Bush and have lost friends over it. I really like this person but I keep asking myself, can I be with someone that supports hatred? What do you all think.
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KG
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:51 PM
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1. run, do not walk, to the nearest exit... |
stumblnrose
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:51 PM
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radwriter0555
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:44 PM
Response to Reply #2 |
80. egads to even CONTEMPLATE dating a republican is nasty. Just break the |
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wrist, walk away, break the wrist, walk away.
Grab my arm.
Other arm.
MY other arm.
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lonestarnot
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:52 PM
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3. Dump that pile of shit in a hurry! |
Vinca
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:52 PM
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4. Here's my advice . . . RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!! |
fleabert
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:53 PM
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5. I don't know what you should do, but... |
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I would run, not walk, away. I keep as much distance as possible from people like that. Republicans are one thing, but shit like that is another.
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Poll_Blind
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:53 PM
Response to Original message |
6. I say, where Love takes you, follow... |
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See where it goes. Just because someone supports Bush doesn't mean they're cognizant of all the evil Bush does. If you like her, she's likely got a brain, and you can reveal to her what's really going on.
Just a thought.
PB
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havocmom
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:53 PM
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7. Lucky you! Not much tome invested in the relationship so cut your minimal |
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loses and get outta there!
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wakeme2008
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:53 PM
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8. It will only get worse as time goes on and she |
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trys to convert you.
Just IMHO..
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rocktivity
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:54 PM
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9. If you were willing to lose business and social relationships over Bush |
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putting an end to a possible romantic relationship should be elementary, my dear Seeker. If she's stuck in "blame Clinton" mode, she's hopeless.
:headbang: rocknation
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KyndCulture
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:54 PM
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Pobeka
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:54 PM
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11. "can I be with someone that supports hatred?". |
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I would ask her that question, posed as the dilema you face.
Then if you leave she'll at least have feedback why you left, instead of being able to blindly label you as a pink-commie-fag.
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otohara
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:55 PM
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never look back!
Just say she has serious personality disorder and call it a day.
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sendero
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:55 PM
Response to Original message |
13. Bid her a fond adeiu... |
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.... not because she "supports Bush". But because she is missing a core set of values that you cherish.
There is no way you two will ever be happy together. Break it off nicely, but do it, unless you really think you can learn to approve of the Dictatortot.
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peacebird
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:56 PM
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14. be grateful you found out early, before getting to far into a relationship |
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and simply cite irreconcilable differences.
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Viva_La_Revolution
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:56 PM
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15. If you really do like her.... |
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then at least you have to tell her how you feel, and why... See what she says. Then if you still find it necessary, RUN!
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Poiuyt
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:00 PM
Response to Reply #15 |
28. This is the best advice - be honest with her |
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I've know Democrats who are married to Republicans. If you really like her then this would have to be a topic that would never be raised. But you have to wonder about someone who's core values would allow them to support Bush. (Yes, I said values)
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Eloriel
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:16 PM
Response to Reply #28 |
104. Of course it's about values |
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I couldn't even be friends with someone who is a Bush supporter.
But beyond that, Republicanism itself is nothing but self-serving institutionalized greed: "I've got mine, and that's all that matters."
IF -- and it's a big if -- you can determine that her own core values even allow for compassion, generosity of spirit, etc., and that her current political leanings are from political ignorance, you might be safe in pursuing this.
But if not, then it wouldn't be a relationship based on much other than, um, chemistry, I guess, and I can assure you that gets stale after a while.
My question is: why are you even dating someone WITHOUT knowing what her political VALUES are?
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in_cog_ni_to
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:56 PM
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16. Tell her you could not possibly date someone who supports this |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 01:59 PM by in_cog_ni_to
warmongering administration and you are finished with her. RUN! as fast as you can! What could you POSSIBLY have in common with someone like that? I don't even have friends who are repukes. I can't stand to be around them.
Ewwwwww....I couldn't imagine DATING one. YUCK!
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Tom Yossarian Joad
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:56 PM
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17. Consider a professional deprogrammer.... |
shanti
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:57 PM
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18. run, run like the wind! |
TomClash
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:57 PM
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19. Business is one thing |
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but dating a Bush supporter is entirely different.
Say goodbye.
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niallmac
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:57 PM
Response to Original message |
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Ask her "I you start talking RW trash and I tell you to shut the f*** up. Would you be OK with that?" Compromise is always the best way.
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BleedingHeartPatriot
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #20 |
102. ROFLMAO, niallmac. n/t |
proud patriot
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:57 PM
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21. As this is a very private matter , I can tell you what I couldn't do |
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I could not love or be best friends with anyone who excused torture, invasion, greedy corporations, The patriot act, or mocked good Liberals with that infuriating arrogance that bush supporters have .
other people might be able to do it but I couldn't .
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Ezlivin
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:58 PM
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22. Stay with her until you find out all the areas in which you disagree |
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You may have found your one true soul-mate and not know it.
Just because you disagree over politics doesn't mean that there is nothing redeemable about this woman. I've changed political positions over the years; others do as well.
It may seem trite, but Six Feet Under has a story line in which one of the characters (Claire) is a "screaming liberal" and her new love interest appears to be a strong supporter of the Iraq War and, hence, a "screaming conservative." Just when you think the two of them are going to split up over political differences, a family tragedy occurs and allows Claire to see her friend rise to the occasion and really provide needed support. She's able to see past his political stance and see the caring person that he is.
People are so multi-faceted it's best to find out all about them before you throw in the towel.
Give her a chance. Perhaps a couple of years from now she'll be working at your side.
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benny05
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:59 PM
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23. not all W supporters are like that |
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I'm married to a W supporter, but he didn't dislike Clinton. He feels the Democratic party left him, so he became voted for the other party, although he doesn't send any money to them. But I might add my spouse didn't vote for Alan Keynes when Keyes was running against Obama in my state.
I have one friend that became a freeper, and it has caused some pain in our 35+ years of friendship. We just don't discuss politics at all.
My spouse and I engage occasionally about W and his ilk, but most of the time, we laugh at each others' politics. We've been told we're entertaining at lunch. Generally, I get an upper hand because we work at a liberal institution.
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Delphinus
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Sun Aug-07-05 01:59 PM
Response to Original message |
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It ruins relationships.
I loved this man very much, but we parted ways when I found out how stupid he was in regard to politics. I had the deepest respect for his intelligence - politics aside.
It was just too much.
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Jara sang
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:00 PM
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25. Yeah, dump her, she's damaged goods. |
shugh514
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:00 PM
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26. As a survivor of failed relationships |
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I say never begin a relationship on the premise that it will be okay as long as your partner changes. Especially if it involves converting a wingnut!:crazy:
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helderheid
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:00 PM
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27. friends don't let friends date shrub supporters. |
lonestarnot
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:01 PM
Response to Reply #27 |
helderheid
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:04 PM
Response to Reply #31 |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:05 PM by helderheid
Besides - didn't we determine the majority on DU were women? C'mon, we gotta great liberal dating section right here!
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Vektor
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:01 PM
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29. If you can't convert her - MOVE ON. |
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I tried dating a Republican - what a DISASTER.
Some people can be made to see the light, but others are too brainwashed, too far gone and not worth the effort put forth in saving them.
If she continues to tout Bush, run - don't walk to the nearest exit, because, YES, she is supporting hate, bigotry, intolerance, and war, and that puts her right in line with those doing the hating and warmongering. In other words, NOT A NICE PERSON.
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Ian David
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:01 PM
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30. Well, ask if she wants to have a threesome with you and another woman |
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If she says no, then it's not worth keeping a Bush-supporting girlfriend.
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EVDebs
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:01 PM
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32. There are plenty of other fish in the sea ! eom |
FreepFryer
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:03 PM
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33. There IS DEFINITELY something wrong w/a GOP female. |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:04 PM by FreepFryer
I date men of all political stripes, but either we enjoy our little political battles in good fun or it doesn't last. I have NO Republican friends who are women.
Although it may be sexist, as a hetero female I find such blatant, greedy, manipulative conservatism to be completely repellent in other females.
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still_one
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:03 PM
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34. It comes down to this |
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1833 Americans have died because of bush lies
13189 Americans have been wounded because of bush lies
tens of thousands of civilians have been killed because of bush lies
They are for destroying social security and medicare, and overturning a woman's right to her own body
I look at James Carville and Mary Matilin, and shake my head. Are we being played for suckers. Is this a game for them while our standard of living goes down, and our young people die in baseless wars
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marions ghost
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:04 PM
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36. anyway she's obsessed with clenis |
noamnety
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:04 PM
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37. I can't think of anything less attractive |
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For me, it would be the end.
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City Lights
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:05 PM
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38. Can't tell you what to do, but if it were me, I'd walk away. |
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Not just because she's a ** supporter, but because she's an irrational, rabid ** supporter. Anyone starting out with a rant about "Clinton's penis" wouldn't get the time of day from me. The "Clinton's penis" argument is irrelevant and tiresome. :eyes:
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Nightjock
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:05 PM
Response to Original message |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:06 PM by Nightjock
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Nightjock
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:05 PM
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40. My heartfelt advice...get out now |
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I lost a lifelong friend because he is completely brainwashed. I tried over and over and over again to talk with him. And many others. They support hate. They are racists. Ignorant. Sometimes just plain dumb. Or just so scared by 9-11 thier brains have shut off and they don't even realize bush has created MORE terrorists.
Gentle debate. Forceful debate. Literature. Facts. Cold, plain facts.
None of it works. I had known my friend for 35 years. We tried not talking politics. That does not work. He still calls me and I let the machine pick up. I can't even imagine dating someone like that.
Be grateful you are not deeply involved. I thought about this for a while before I gave you my answer. This is not a knee jerk reaction.
Get out NOW.
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Maru Kitteh
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:05 PM
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41. Sorry this one didn't really work out for you. It's tough being lonely |
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but it's very important to think with the proper head on this one.
Can you see yourself long term with someone who is so fundamentally different from you and your values? Is that a happy picture?
I would advise cutting your losses sooner rather than later.
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Syncronaut Seven
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:05 PM
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42. Your already outclassed, you'll never compare, the Clenis is POWERFULL!!! |
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If she's this obsessed, you never had a chance.
DAMN YOU CLENIS!!!! DAMN YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL!!!!! :rofl:
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nadinbrzezinski
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:06 PM
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43. I can't tell you what to do |
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but if this was me, I would be running for the closest exit, she is not going to change until it gets personal
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Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:07 PM
Response to Original message |
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and I know this shit comes from her dad who is ex military. It just amazes me how someone who is intelligent can be so ignorant. Her attitude is we have a difference of opinion and lets leave it at that but obviously it goes much deeper than that.
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Mayberry Machiavelli
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:11 PM
Response to Reply #44 |
49. You say you are 'starting out' with this woman. Now you are getting |
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to know her better. Now you see some traces of ugliness, with the "Clenis" mentioning and all that.
Now, is she really as great as you thought? You didn't mention what was good about her.
Also, what is your commitment to her, really, at this point? Do you really have any?
Did you mention to her what YOUR politics are? Assuming they are different from hers, what was her response to that?
Is there really a dilemma here?
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bobbieinok
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:39 PM
Response to Reply #44 |
76. can't imagine staying.....but TELL her about torture, lies, etc....ie, why |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:40 PM by bobbieinok
in late 50s in college: even then I couldn't imagine dating, much less anything else, someone who disagreed with me fundamentally on politics.............it turned out later that in my marriage choice political values trumped religious affiliation---later the lack of surface religious agreement bothered me----much later I see/think now that religious values play out in political values and stands, so there is core agreement in religious values if there is core agreement in political values
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BiggJawn
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:07 PM
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45. Lemme see if I have this right.... |
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You have broken off business relations with Bushies (and i magine you try to "Shop Blue" wherever you can) but now you're torn over what to doi with this woman.
2 things come to mind. Either you want to be another James Carville or She can suck-start a Terex Titan.
Dump her. And be up front with her, tell her you can't build a life with someone who supports the gang that's keeping her down.
Lots of sexy Liberal women out there just DIEING to spend some time with you!
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WilliamPitt
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:08 PM
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46. Everyone here says to get out |
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I say stick, if you like her. It's a project. :)
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lonestarnot
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:09 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
48. You're slipping William Pitt! |
WilliamPitt
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:15 PM
Response to Reply #48 |
55. Watching me from the window box |
benny05
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:11 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:18 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
61. I agree and disagree... |
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Projects are fine. For friends. But I would back WAY off and not get too emotionally invested in someone who's a project. As someone who has gone down that road, it can be very painful if they don't end up turning into a decent human being. (Ask me about my experience with cute but nihilistic, non-political, somewhat libertarian boys some time.)
To the OP, only you can decide if it's worth it to you. But I'm here to tell you...if you stick with this person it will not be easy. Try being friends first, spend some time talking, see if you make any progress before deciding you want to get serious romantically with this person.
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davidinalameda
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:18 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
62. building a model airplane is a project |
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this is a person
people aren't projects
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WilliamPitt
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:27 PM
Response to Reply #62 |
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What is politics, then? Elections?
A project dealing with people.
"All politics is local." - Tip O'Neill
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:31 PM
Response to Reply #71 |
74. But politics and relationships aren't really the same thing... |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:36 PM by VelmaD
I don't think it's really fair to enter into a romantic relationship with someone with the idea that you're going to change them to make them exactly what you want. It takes away their right to decide who they want to be. That certainly isn't something that qualifies as "love" in my book.
How would you feel to be on the receiving end of that kind of behavior from someone you thought cared about you for you? I personally would be pissed.
With friends it's a little different...but not much. I think there's a little more room to maneuvre without the complication of sex and love and feelings.
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WilliamPitt
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:43 PM
Response to Reply #74 |
78. One of the best relationships I ever was in |
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had me and the lady debating like cats and dogs for hours and days and weeks and months. It kept things fresh, fun, and I learned and she learned. That relationship lasted almost ten years.
Hanging out with people who agree with you 100% is boring.
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:54 PM
Response to Reply #78 |
92. I'm not sure how to respond... |
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without feeling like I'm bayonetting the wounded.
I've had relationships like that...and the give and take was fun. I love to argue as much as the next person. (And the makeup sex could be incredible sometimes. ;)) But I guess my point is that I'm obviously no longer involved with any of those guys.
In most cases I knew they weren't the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with so I wasn't trying to change them (much) and I could let things go.
With the one I thought I was in love with...well, it hurt like hell at the end. He and I are still friends and we still have amazing chemistry and he still hits on me when we run into each other...but I'm not willing to walk into that hurt again. We're basically incompatible in the long term - too many things we disagree on that we aren't going to change our minds about - and as I finally grew up I realized us trying to change each other caused nothing but pain.
That said, I do agree with your last point. If two people agree on everything...one of them is redundant. I just find it easier to be with people who agree with me on some very basic core values.
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Kerrytravelers
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #92 |
130. I see what you're saying VelmaD |
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Agreeing on everything is impossible (although, I must admit, Mr. kt and I are pretty close.) But there are some core fundamental issues that are too much a part of who I am.
In the past, being with someone who was registered to a different party and who had different beliefs wasn't such a big deal because the country wasn't so divided (ok, maybe during Vietnam) but in the past 30 years, things had calmed down. But with this idiot, and all he represents, things are far more personal.
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PassingFair
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:30 PM
Response to Reply #78 |
116. Hanging out with people |
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who support the brutal bombing and bloody occupation of a foreign country in order to control their natural resources is just plain psychopathic behavior.
I could probably have been married to a Republican during past administrations (ugh! shudder! I SAID probably...)but I could NOT sleep comfortably with a person who backs * and his administration's imperialistic gambits.
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laura888
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:33 PM
Response to Reply #116 |
120. Your first sentence says it all. |
smoogatz
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
65. Only one thing could make up for being a Bush supporter |
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and that's if she's absolutely, incredibly great in the sack. There, I said it.
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sandnsea
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:53 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
88. Seeker30 ain't got no stick |
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Notice he didn't even stick around to respond to anybody in this thread?
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Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:03 PM
Response to Reply #88 |
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With 'stick' I assume you are referring to a penis, so what does 'a stick' have to do with responding to posts? Do you type with your penis?
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pitohui
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:44 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
128. not fair to make other people yr project |
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if the roles were reversed you know damn well that everyone would tell the woman, never go in thinking you can change him, men don't change
give women the courtesy to assume that they too have convictions and are not gumby dolls to be changed at a whim
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WilliamPitt
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Sun Aug-07-05 04:00 PM
Response to Reply #128 |
158. Ever become friends with someone |
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whose perspective, thoughts and beliefs changed yours?
Did that make you a gumby doll?
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Zhade
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:09 PM
Response to Original message |
47. Too stupid, ignorant, or evil to date. |
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Shit, I'm not even FRIENDS with anyone who supports traitors like b*s* - I have to sleep with myself at night.
Sorry, just my opinion.
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Oerdin
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:12 PM
Response to Original message |
51. LEarn to talk about other topics. |
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Don't just dwell on what you don't have in common and learn to talk about things you do have in common.
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Schema Thing
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:12 PM
Response to Original message |
52. There is ONE decent excuse for this, and only one. |
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The woman I'm dating falls into this catagory: ignorance.
If a person was not raised to be aware, and then got thrown into life as an adult, busy raising kids, and working their ass off to support them...well, they just never learn how to discern.
For now, don't ask her about GW Bush, instead, find out if she is a compasionate person, if she can reason, if she has a sense of justice based on something deeper than just revenge.
If she passes those test, the rest is just getting her accurate information.
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yurbud
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #52 |
66. i concur--i have been further right until life and info gradually sunk in |
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Hillbilly Hitler art:
Blog:
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Caleb
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:14 PM
Response to Original message |
53. If you really like her and she is great in so many ways |
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Who cares what her politics are?
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Kerrytravelers
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:28 PM
Response to Reply #53 |
72. Because if politics are important to you, then it matters very much. |
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Politics are important to me, which is why I could only marry somone I would want my children around. I surround myself with like-minded people. I know what the other team has to say... and I don't like it. Why would I want that kind of hateful hostility so close to me on such an intimate level?
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LisaL
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:54 PM
Response to Reply #53 |
91. Can anyone be great and support Bush at the same time? |
smoogatz
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:15 PM
Response to Original message |
54. I had a similar dilemma |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:16 PM by smoogatz
when I lived in Atlanta. I went out a few times with a VERY attractive woman that I'd met through my job. She was gorgeous, if no Einstein, and fun in at least a superficial kind of way. She was a practicing Catholic, which was fine--but it turned out she was a RABID charismatic Catholic (imagine the worst elements of evangelical Protestantism and pre-Vatican II Catholicism all balled into one), who enjoyed protesting at abortion clinics. That pretty much tore it for me--whatever attraction I felt for her evaporated when I heard that. To paraphrase Lorrie Moore, why are the mentally ill so attractive?
Your situation is similar, with one added caveat: anyone who'd still support Bush, after all the lies and debacles (and lies about the debacles), must be either delusional, an idiot, or both. Do you really want to date someone like that?
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kodi
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:15 PM
Response to Original message |
56. unless she has a red cape with a big "S" on it between her legs, run away |
DefenseLawyer
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:16 PM
Response to Original message |
57. My wife was nominally republican |
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when I met her, and now 12 years later she is more liberal than I am (which takes some doing). It's not that I "deprogrammed" her, she just hadn't really been exposed to another point of view, or really devoted a lot of time to the issues. If she has other good qualities and is willing to have a discussion, I wouldn't give up on her just yet.
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undeterred
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:17 PM
Response to Original message |
58. Keep your penis away from her. She'll start blaming it for everything. |
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I've walked out on a date for statements less ridiculous than that.
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davidinalameda
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:17 PM
Response to Original message |
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just one thing to think about--would you want your children raised by someone who thinks that way she does
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Kablooie
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:17 PM
Response to Original message |
60. Here's whatcha do ... |
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Get her pregnant then abort the baby with a coat hanger, Bushie style.
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TheCowsCameHome
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:19 PM
Response to Original message |
63. If you kissed her, take a bath in Drano to reduce the chance of infection |
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One mustn't be too cautious................
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stray cat
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:19 PM
Response to Original message |
64. What is it she likes about Bush? |
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I assume she is too smart to just be an irrational koolaid drinker so she may have some reasons. I can support someone without liking everything about them or everything they do.
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LisaL
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:53 PM
Response to Reply #64 |
89. What reasons can there possibly be to like Bush? |
Kerrytravelers
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:22 PM
Response to Original message |
67. Don't think you can change anyone. And if her family is * lovers... |
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and pulling that "military might" bullshit, good luck. Mr. kt was already on the road to change long before I met him. His family are shurb-loving fundy biggoted hateful monsters whom I HATE WITH A WHITE HOT PASSION AND COULD CARE LESS IF I EVER SEE THEM AGAIN BECAUES THEY SPEW SUCH HATE. I FUCKING HATE THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You don't want to have this around you if you can help it. See how unhealthy it makes you. Mr. kt barely speaks to his parents because of all the hate email we have received and the comments. I don't speak to them. They will have only supervised visitation of the kids... and the rest will be no where near our children. It can be that bad.
We have only one person we know who is a repuke, and she is married to a Dem. She knows to leep her god damn mouth shut because I have let her know exactly how I ffel about her politics of hatred.
Really, join a Dem club or liberal organization and meet some nice, like-minded women who can make you happy. Mr. kt and I are a team. We work together on liberal causes and support one another. I can't imagine living any other way.
They will be spending a large amount of time trying to convert you, spewing hatred and personally, it is bad for you soul, as you can see by how much I hate Mr. kt's family. I mean, really hate Mr. kt's family. My parents, who get along with EVERYBODY, want nothing to do with them.
Find a nice Dem woman and have an easier life. If she's still obsessed with Clinton's penis, she's a lost cause.
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Carolab
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:23 PM
Response to Original message |
68. Let me guess, you're attracted to her, right? |
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My son went through a period of time during which he "put up with" serious differences until he realized he was only excusing them because of the sexual chemistry.
My advice? Admit what you REALLY like about her. If it's that shallow, be honest with yourself and WALK ON.
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democrat in Tallahassee
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:25 PM
Response to Original message |
yorgatron
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #69 |
73. she's obsessed with the clenis |
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ask her if she wants to play a game of "Bill and Monica" :evilgrin:
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Spock_is_Skeptical
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:25 PM
Response to Original message |
70. I can't really advise you in your situation, but if it were me |
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I would break it off, most certainly. In the long run, it would be much too much emotional truama.
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Proud2BAmurkin
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:36 PM
Response to Original message |
75. All Repuke females are castrating bitches |
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Just like all Repuke males are castrated asshats. Run for your life.
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Tactical Progressive
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:42 PM
Response to Original message |
77. There are going to be alot of uncomfortable silences |
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In this very political time - and I think it's going to continue on this way for many, many years - there are going to be a million instances where you're going to find yourself forcing your mouth closed. From everything that passes by on the news to comedian's jokes to conversations with friends, to you name it, things come up all the time. I'd think that the tension would be stultifying. You're going to have to censor much of what would come out of you and accept much of what will come out of her in so many day-to-day situations.
All made worse by the fact that Republicans are congenitally predisposed to spew their shit. They can't stop. Between family and neighbors, Republicans always have to put their rancid two cents in no matter how much of a non-sequitor it takes. I think the need is in direct relation to the untenability of their dishonest and corrupt worldview that they have to stick this stuff out there for some form of self-validation. Her contrived rancor over Clinton sure seems like she's likely to be just one of those people.
What are you going to do when say at a dinner conversation she goes on about family values or honesty and integrity or some such, as much to impugn Democrats as anything else. Are you going to go off on how Republicans are corrupt and dishonest and don't give a shit about any values but their own twisted ones? That sounds blissful.
More likely you'll just find yourself holding your tongue and stewing, and as you do that Republicans take it for victory and get worse. You can't win. Either you fight or you take it with your head down. There is no reasoning with most of them.
With casual acquaintances you sideskirt their bullshit and then you get to go home and move on.
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Walt Starr
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:43 PM
Response to Original message |
79. There must be fifty ways for you to break it off...n/t |
Spinzonner
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:46 PM
Response to Original message |
81. Well, since you worked so hard to make a great first impression |
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like, "setting her off more", maybe you've solved the problem already and won't have to make a choice - she'll do it for you.
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tokenlib
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:48 PM
Response to Original message |
82. Check for ignorance.. |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 02:50 PM by tokenlib
If ignorance, she may change.. If Clinton pissed her off with Monica, focus on the "big picture". If she is beyond redemption--end it. If she is a "social darwinist" and defends Bush evil toward everyone who just need a little help--run for your life..
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TheCowsCameHome
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:48 PM
Response to Original message |
83. I hope she doesn't look like Ann Coulter or Mary Matlin |
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That would be a early-alert warning sign if ever there was one.
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linazelle
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:49 PM
Response to Original message |
84. If Carville and Matalin are your idols, stick around...if not RUN!!! nt |
Zorra
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:51 PM
Response to Original message |
85. Dump her. She'll set you up to steal everything she can from you. n/t |
Malikshah
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:52 PM
Response to Original message |
86. You either stand for something or you don't |
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Might sound harsh--but at this point in time--it's beyond "setting politics aside" You can try and convert--some people just need to be educated...
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sakabatou
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:53 PM
Response to Original message |
87. Ask that politics be not brought up |
Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:53 PM
Response to Original message |
90. How would you feel if she dumped you because you're a liberal? |
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If she did dump you for being a liberal, I'm sure there'd be a post about the ignorance of the right and blah blah blah. It's no different for a liberal to dump someone because they're conservative than for a conservative to dump someone for being a liberal.
You're a god damn adult, so act like one and simply accept the fact that this woman doesn't have the same politics as you. You're not voting for her, you're starting a relationship.
God almighty...
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LisaL
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Sun Aug-07-05 02:58 PM
Response to Reply #90 |
93. Her liking Bush indicates a deep flaw in her character. |
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:08 PM
Response to Reply #93 |
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LisaL
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:13 PM
Original message |
So what are you going to do if you meet a woman who doesn't |
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Edited on Sun Aug-07-05 03:15 PM by lizzy
believe in woman's right to choose, is against gays and lesbians being allowed to marry, against gun control, etc? Just ignore it? If it's just casual dating, then it's one thing to ignore it. But what if your goal is serious relationship? Do you seriously think it will work out?
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:15 PM
Response to Original message |
103. i dated an anti-choice, anti-gay rights, pro gun girl |
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she didn't cheat on me, but it ended because my schoolwork prevented me from seeing her often enough for this to work out. but for the time we were dating it was absolutely wonderful.
i dated a pro-choice, pro-gay rights, pro-gun control, pro women's rights feminist before her, and she cheated on me. I've been mistreated in relationships by liberal women more than conservative ones.
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:51 PM
Response to Reply #103 |
144. So you dated one liberal woman and one conservative woman |
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and THAT's enough for YOU to form an opinion about liberal versus conservative women? (which is what you did in your post, btw)
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:52 PM
Response to Reply #144 |
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:54 PM
Response to Reply #147 |
149. But you just said the politics did in your prior post |
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You said you've been treated worse by liberal women than conservative women.
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 04:00 PM
Response to Reply #149 |
157. and yet i keep dating liberal women too |
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because i know not all women are the same despite their political pursuasions.
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Kerrytravelers
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:21 PM
Response to Reply #99 |
110. A bit judgemental towards the solicited opinions to the op. |
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At 22, maybe you don't have the life experience of others who have had relationships with people who are fundamentally polar opposite than ourselves. Maybe you do have the life experience. I don't know. I wouldn't begin to call you names and insuinate that I'm far more mature than you because I have a different opinion.
You may say whatever you want in retalliation to me. Personally, I've been there, done that, and I found that being with someone who is so vile and ignorant is draining on the soul. These posts certainly weren't unsolicited. The op asked for opinions. That's what he got.
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Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:26 PM
Response to Reply #99 |
113. Dude, you're 22 years old |
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And you already think you know it all. You have no idea how the dynamics of a relationship change over a long period of time, especially once you're married with kids.
Your idea that its just politics is complete bullshit. Someone that thinks its fine for a leader to lie in order to invade a country has nothing to do with 'just politics'.
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CubsFan1982
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:32 PM
Response to Reply #113 |
119. Then why'd you ask for opinions? |
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This isn't a hive, we don't all think alike.
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Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:35 PM
Original message |
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but having a 22 year old with little experience in the relationship area telling people to grow up is another.
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CubsFan1982
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:41 PM
Response to Original message |
124. Have you even HEARD about today's youth? |
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Since we're fucking anything and everything that moves, according to the mainstream media, maybe we ARE qualified to give relationship advice.
I think you're just making up reasons to be rid of this woman, so you portray her to be a complete bitch and hope the rest of us support you.
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:44 PM
Response to Reply #124 |
127. Fucking does not equal... |
Individualist
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #127 |
Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:47 PM
Response to Original message |
136. Okay how about if I bring up something irrelevant about you |
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to undercut anything you say about relationships?
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:37 PM
Response to Reply #113 |
123. You aren't looking for advice at all apparently |
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you're just looking for people to support your actions.
make that clear next time.
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Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:49 PM
Response to Reply #123 |
139. Havent decided about my actions |
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so your statement is condescending.
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:56 PM
Response to Reply #139 |
152. bullshit you didn't decide on your actions |
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you already admitted you were going to go away, and the fact that you attacked my age as a reason to discredit my advice shows that anyone who shares a view other than yours has no point giving you advice.
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NaturalHigh
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:02 PM
Response to Reply #90 |
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I have friends whose political views are nearly polar opposites of mine. It doesn't mean we can't enjoy a football game together. Our biggest debates usually consist of buffalo wings vs. Papa Johns.
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dissent1977
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:08 PM
Response to Reply #90 |
100. Honestly if someone dumped me because of my politics... |
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I would be glad. If a persons politics are too different from their partners it can lead to some big conflicts later on. You do not want to build a relationship with someone who was completely incompatible.
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #100 |
101. well your priorities are incredibly messed up then |
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here is what matters: how she treats other people, this guy hasn't said she mistreats anyone. since she's a single mother, how she treats her kids. again, the op didn't say anything about her being a terrible mother. how pleasant she is when on a date or spending some time alone with the guy. again till he, for some inexplicably stupid reason, brought up politics it seemed she was a fantastic date.
her actions are more important than her beliefs, and the original poster has shown no evidence that the fact she supports Bush has turned her into some kind of awful human being.
again, some people need to grow up.
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:17 PM
Response to Reply #101 |
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Repeatedly telling people who disagree with you to "grow up" does nothing to strengthen your argument or establish your credentials as a grown up, btw.
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:19 PM
Response to Reply #106 |
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:23 PM
Response to Reply #109 |
111. If you don't understand the substantive difference... |
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between rooting for different football teams and having fundamentally diferent core political values then I'm not sure there's anything more to say to you. The differences in values and policies that affect REAL LIVES between the Democrats and Republicans are vast and far-reaching and important. To compare it to which football team you support is inane.
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:31 PM
Response to Reply #111 |
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:35 PM
Response to Reply #118 |
122. First off I'll thank you not to put the word... |
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"bitch" in my mouth. I'll thank you even more to not use it in the future.
Second, did you read the OP about her reaction to him bringing up politics? Sounds a bit rabid to me. Her reaction to him bringing up politics is a part of her personality. And one that doesn't sound too attractive. People like someone on first meeting and then later find out they have unattractive qualities all the time. Just because she made a good first impression the OP is supposed to ignore everything that happens after that? What. Ever.
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dissent1977
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:29 PM
Response to Reply #109 |
115. Do you honestly equate politics with football? |
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Bush has brought much destruction upon the world, I could never bring myself to date a supporter of his. It would seriously be like dating a supporter of Hitler to me.
To say it is no different than refusing to date a Cowboys fan is absolutely ridiculous.
Bush led us into a war that has killed over 100,000 civilians, he has destroyed our environment, spread corporate power, invaded our privacy, and lied to us repeatedly. I could never be in a serious relationship with someone who actually thought it was a good thing to kill as many people as Bush's policies have killed.
You tell me to grow up, but I think you need to grow up if you don't realize the very serious nature of politics. This is a lot more serious than some stupid football game.
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:43 PM
Response to Reply #115 |
126. no i equate hating people for who they support |
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politically with who they support in sports, because none of these things matter in any kind of way.
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #126 |
134. what utter bullshit... |
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Who and what you support politically says a lot about a person. If you support a political party that is racist, sexist, anti-environment, pro-war and basically devoted to raping the planet and everyone on it for a profit...then you've got issues.
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:51 PM
Response to Reply #134 |
145. what if it's for economic reasons? |
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plenty of people still support the Republican Party because it's still portrayed as the party of small government, tax cuts, and economic libertarianism. Whether or not this is accurate is another matter.
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:56 PM
Response to Reply #145 |
151. They are still complicit... |
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in the rest of the republican agenda. The Repugs have done nothing to hide the fact that they are anti-women, anti-minorities, anti-environment, and pro-corporations taking over the planet. You have to be willfully blind not to see that and I have no respect for people who chose not to see. If I don't respect someone, then I can't form a relationship with them. Period.
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #126 |
137. Politics doesn't matter? |
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And where did he say he hated her? He is questioning forming a relationship with her. It's valid.
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dissent1977
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:17 PM
Response to Reply #101 |
107. It is "inexplicably stupid" to bring up politics? |
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If I was going to be spending a huge chunk of my life with a single person, I don't want to be in a situation in which I can't bring up politics. The fact is that politics have a major effect on all of our lives, and if he did not bring them up now they would have came up later. Having such far differing political beliefs can ruin a relationship, this is an important issue.
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:18 PM
Response to Reply #101 |
108. She's mistreating the entire world by supporting George Bush |
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And it seems to me if what comes out of her mouth is "Clinton's penis this and Clinton's penis that" then he's not the one that needs to grow up.
Today's politics cuts to the CORE of who we are as human beings.
BTW..based on the tirade she went into when he brought up Bush he DID indicate that her support of Bush produced a marked change in her personality.
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:27 PM
Response to Reply #108 |
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:30 PM
Response to Reply #114 |
117. Thanks for the lecture, but reread the OP |
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It's wonderful that you are surrounded by so many wonderful Republicans..I am happy for you
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:33 PM
Response to Reply #117 |
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This woman is great in so many ways and I really started liking her then last night I brought up Bush to see where she stood.
What's your point? I want to have some kind of idea what the hell you're trying to prove to me.
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #121 |
133. Read the SECOND sentence |
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The second sentence made my point...
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:48 PM
Response to Reply #133 |
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Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:49 PM
Response to Reply #138 |
140. How is the OP lying about his intentions for this thread? |
Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:55 PM
Response to Reply #140 |
150. he says he's asking for advice |
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when he's given it, he instead attacks my age instead of what i suggested, clearly indicating he just wants support for what he already has done.
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nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:59 PM
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155. I don't think he attacked your age. I think you used your age to claim |
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you were more mature than others at 22.
I think it's valid in the area of relationships to challenge you since the amount of time you could have devoted to long term relationships at 22 is far less than others.
I also think that does not prove he is lying about HIS intentions...he's simply questioning your wisdom in the matter as are several people on this thread since you seem to equate political ideology to sports then question everyone else's values.
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Catholic Sensation
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Sun Aug-07-05 04:02 PM
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159. no, i said the fact that i'm willing to accept people's beliefs more than |
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others makes me more mature at age 22 than people who seem older. I'm seeing a lot of immature posts saying things like "RUN AWAY SHE'S GOING TO STEAL FROM YOU" when I'm saying that the OP should give the girl a chance because he apparently thought she was great before all this.
Telling people to be accepting and tolerant is more mature than telling people that because someone's a republican, they're going to steal.
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:59 PM
Response to Reply #150 |
156. Well, it's hard to remember with all the deleted posts... |
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but I'm pretty sure you were the one who mentioned your age first. Then told people to "grow the fuck up". Did you really not expect to get called on your behavior?
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VelmaD
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:50 PM
Response to Reply #138 |
143. Wow...where did you get your internet truth detector? |
nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:52 PM
Response to Reply #143 |
146. Actually I was gonna send him the link for where I got mine |
DemonFighterLives
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:56 PM
Response to Reply #114 |
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I find it amazing how you can criticize most here and tell them to grow up when you are still wet behind the ears. :P
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NeoTraitors
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:02 PM
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95. A low income single mom that supports * must be doing so |
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due to believing lies. Show her the truth. Maybe the 2 of you will live happily ever after and we will have a convert.
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LisaL
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:06 PM
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98. If the person still supports Bush after all this time, then they are |
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willingly blind and there is little hope for them.
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Seeker30
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:16 PM
Response to Reply #95 |
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and I'm sure it is based out of ignorance. She doesnt watch FOX News and is pro abortion, but when you bring up the facts to her its like hitting a brick wall. So my response today about everything she claims is so great about Bush is simply 'what would Jesus think' and leave it at that.
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Individualist
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:04 PM
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97. If you're okay with a willfully ignorant person who supports hate, |
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then keep dating her. My advice would be to get as far away from her as possible and as quickly as possible.
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DemonFighterLives
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:25 PM
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112. So kind of you to ask |
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I would really hesitate if your politics or hers are serious. It is quite possible that she is just repeating her daddy's rhetoric or the talking points passed down. There is always some chance of educating a person like that. Of course relationships like this were more possible before b*shco. It never used to be so serious, but now you either side with evil, death and corruption or you side with truth, freedom and honesty.
A friend of mine was dating a repuke who first lied about his beliefs. Didn't take demonfighter long to figure him out though. He is intelligent, yet chooses to believe b*sh lies to the end. They have broken up about 3 times, but she has allowed her politics to drift where she believes his last comments that Condi is so great and will beat Hillary for the presidency. Another friend when told about her shifting politics, said she will always follow her Dick (not his name BTW). Sex is obviously a strong draw, but most of our lives must be lived in reality and not the bedroom. :dilemma:
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pitohui
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:43 PM
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find someone you can share your heart and soul with not just sex
esp. if she turns out to be some koolaid drinker and the sex won't be any good anyway because of the hang-ups unless you're into screwed-up kinky guilt sex
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OmmmSweetOmmm
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:46 PM
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129. If I found out a man I was starting to see was a ** supporter, I would |
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break it off immediately. It shows that this person has Horrible Judgement, and probably No Heart.
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Kahuna
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:46 PM
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131. Run for your life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
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It's just not meant to be.
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Raksha
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:47 PM
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135. I would also say break it off. |
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It's no longer "only" a difference in political persuasion. It's a matter of basic values (good vs. evil) and also basic psychological health. Anyone who still supports Bush despite what they know about him (or WOULD know if they let themselves) is in serious denial and can't deal with reality, especially if she is still mouthing anti-Clinton talking points. Okay, so Clinton had a zipper problem, but the BFEE is a major crime syndicate.
Either she's in denial or she doesn't care, and either way you don't need her.
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Cronus Protagonist
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:50 PM
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141. DUMP NOW! (if she's THAT dumb.....) |
Garbo 2004
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:50 PM
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142. And how does she feel about dating a liberal who doesn't support Bush? n/t |
nothingshocksmeanymore
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:53 PM
Response to Reply #142 |
spuddonna
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Sun Aug-07-05 03:56 PM
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153. I married a Repug who is now a strong Dem, but... |
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I had the good fortune to have a hubby who was 1)'born into Republicanism', ie his folks were Repugs, he hadn't really 'chosen' to be a Republican, and 2)he was already pro-proice and we agreed on many issues. After a few years of discussions, my hubby 'saw the light', and he's been a dem ever since. That said...
I think that if you find that your SO is unwilling to listen to facts, you may have a problem. I have found that many people treat their politics very much like their belief/religious system. If you try to discuss their religious/political beliefs, and you disagree or try to present an opposite point, conversations can quickly degrade to a 'you're a sinner/you're a liberal scumbag' type of argument instead of a discussion, which leads nowhere. Some people are open to talking about their politics, are willing to learn or modify their views. Some aren't.
Either way, I wish you luck! Finding someone to share your life with is difficult. But remember, the person you choose to share your life with should be a comfort. Even in the years that my hubby and I disagreed about certain issues (that includes now with certain child rearing aspects), he has always been my solace, a place I can find comfort.
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Moderator
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Sun Aug-07-05 04:03 PM
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This thread has run its course and this has become inflammatory.
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