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Hey God, could you clear a few things up for us down here?

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mopaul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:20 PM
Original message
Hey God, could you clear a few things up for us down here?
Edited on Thu Aug-25-05 12:21 PM by mopaul
first of all, where are you, and where have you been for so long?

why don't you ENFORCE the ten commandments, or update them, or add a few or remove a few?

when a plane crashes and only two people survive, were you watching over the two survivors only, and why did all the others die? were they not worth saving?

could you clear up the highly confusing 'free will' argument for us?

why would you create a small percentage of people who are incapable of believing in you, and then send them to eternal damnation?

did hitler get forgiven for his sins right before he croaked himself, and is he in heaven with mother theresa?

did you really have to create mosquitos, leeches, viruses, and cancer?

which religion best represents you, and which ones don't?

why don't you ever answer my prayers?

why do you allow the evil george bush to continue slaughtering thousands of your children who believe in you?

why are some people born lucky, and others lead horribly miserable lives, why are some healthy and some deformed and crippled?

why did you appear to moses, but you won't appear to us, here in the 21st century?

if we are created in your image, why are we so stupid down here?
and why don't we live forever?

do you really need for us to pass the collection plate and raise money?

why do you allow pat robertson to rip off little poor old ladies, and benny hinn too?

what color are you? black, white, red, or yellow?

why are there so many conflicting and opposing religions, instead of one that we can all get behind?

why in the hell is there a hell and a devil? that seems so cruel.

are we supposed to be afraid of you, or love you? which one?

is jesus really coming back, or is that another cruel joke of yours?

which side was right during the crusades?

is there other life out there, and why are we so isolated here?

why did you only have one son, and no daughters?

do you have sex like we do, and are certain sexual practices evil, if so, which ones please? and if yes, with whom? is there a mrs. god?

is the end of the world at hand?

and finally, will i be allowed into heaven, seeing as how i've been such a cranky asshole all my life? i've never killed anyone, or robbed anyone, or coveted anything, or worshipped a graven image, but am i still hellbound? you created me, and i'd like some answers please, in either a dream or some dramatic sign.

i'll be waiting,

thanks

one of your children
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LeftNYC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:24 PM
Response to Original message
1. addendum for the ladies: are you a woman? If so, is there a Mr. God...
dont want to leave anyone out...God wouldnt like that. Or would he?
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Bluerthanblue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 02:44 PM
Response to Reply #1
17. actually in the bible there IS
a 'Goddess of heaven', and families bake cakes for her- but that is bad VERY bad, because she is bad. (she's not a he)

When i first read that i said, "I didn't know god had a WIFE!"
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intheflow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 03:07 PM
Response to Reply #1
20. God has a female aspect in the Bible.
Edited on Thu Aug-25-05 03:07 PM by intheflow
Check out in Proverbs. Wisdom (the wise aspect of God) is referred to with feminine pronouns:

Prov. 1:20
Wisdom cries aloud in the street;
in the markets she raises her voice;


Prov. 7:4
Say to wisdom, "You are my sister,"
and call insight your intimate friend;


Prov. 8:1
Does not wisdom call,
does not understanding raise her voice?


Prov. 8:11
for wisdom is better than jewels,
and all that you may desire cannot compare with her.


Prov. 9:1
Wisdom has built her house,
she has set up her seven pillars.


etc...
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buff2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:25 PM
Response to Original message
2. Great questions
Let us know when you get the answers. :hi:
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Thtwudbeme Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:26 PM
Response to Original message
3. Oh Mod Gods!!! How many posts of MoPaul's do you have to smite
before he understands the term "flamebait?"

;) MoPaul, I luv ya dude...but, you are going to get in mod trouble again!

Stephanie
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Connie_Corleone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:38 PM
Response to Reply #3
8. I was wondering what happened to the other threads.
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Secular Agent Man Donating Member (229 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:30 PM
Response to Original message
4. This thread reminds me of the song XTC did called "Dear God"
Dear god, hope you get the letter and...
I pray you can make it better down here
I don't mean a big reduction in the price of beer
But all the people that you made in your image
See them starving in the street
'Cause they don't get enough to eat from god
I can't believe in you

Dear god, sorry to disturb you but...
I feel that I should be heard loud and clear
We all need a big reduction in amount of tears
And all the people that you made in your image
See them fighting in the street
'Cause they can't make opinions meet about god
I can't believe in you

Did you make disease and the diamond blue?
Did you make mankind after we made you?
And the devil too!

Dear god don't know if you noticed but...
Your name is on a lot of quotes in this book
And us crazy humans wrote it, you should take a look
And all the people that you made in your image
still believing that junk is true
Well I know it ain't, and so do you
Dear god
I can't believe in
I don't believe

I won't believe in heaven or hell
No saints, no sinners, no devil as well
No pearly gates, no thorny crown
You're always letting us humans down
The wars you bring, the babes you drown
Those lost at sea and never found
And it's the same the whole world 'round
The hurt I see helps to compound
That father, son and holy ghost
Is just somebody's unholy hoax
And if you're up there you'll perceive
That my heart's here upon my sleeve
If there's one thing I don't believe in

It's you
Dear god :wow:
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papau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:30 PM
Response to Original message
5. Great Questions- and you speak for many of us "cranky assholes" !
:-)
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shraby Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:31 PM
Response to Original message
6. Good one! Right up to MoPaul's
standards. I really really like to read your thoughts.
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Connie_Corleone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:31 PM
Response to Original message
7. "Hey, I just started the process."
Edited on Thu Aug-25-05 12:32 PM by Connie_Corleone
"I'm not the god of the Bible. Some guys wrote it and made stuff up about me. I just started the ball rolling with the universe. Everything else just evolved. As far as why bad things happen, shit happens. I don't have anything to do with it. You're on your own. I'm just keepin' it real. Good luck. Peace out. God"
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smirkymonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:39 PM
Response to Original message
9. Thanks Mopual!
I have always considered myself to be a fairly good-natured person (with the occasional bouts of depression) but for the last few years I have also been a "cranky asshole" despite my committed effort to find some kind of spiritual path to ease life's burdens and pain. All this to no avail.

I have prayed, meditated, gone to 12 step meetings (a lot), read every spritual book on the planet on every spiritual tradition and still I can find no peace in this world (unless I am sitting alone in nature surrounded by animals.)

This world is so fucked up and I feel like everyone I have encountered over the last few years has been totally fucked up as well. Thank god I still have friends from childhood because most of my newer "friends" are crazy people (some nice crazy, some nasty crazy) and I so tired of it all lately.

I am also extremely angry at a "god" if there is one because why the hell would he create us the way we are only to have us find "salvation" in NOT being the way we are - constantly having to fight against our own nature in order to have the promise of "heaven".
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IndyOp Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 10:30 PM
Response to Reply #9
28. ...unless I am sitting alone in nature surrounded by animals.
Don't dismiss this. Go more often. It will help with your practice of the 12 Steps; discovery of great spiritual principles; and finding the good in people around you (or finding good people).

I go to 'church' every morning when I walk my dogs at a local park.

Peace. :hug:
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smirkymonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 11:56 AM
Response to Reply #28
40. Thanks Indy!
You're right! If that's where I find heaven, then so be it. I don't know why I am so hung up on having to find a spiritual connection through some "god" or religion or the way most other people have found it.

I love your description of church! That's my idea as well, I sit in a park in the morning before I go to work and watch the dogs! I always say that "god" is "dog" spelled backward!

Peace to you! :hug:
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pocket Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:39 PM
Response to Original message
10. also, please tell us the truth about
chupacabras.

Right now there seems to be more evidence in favor of the existence chupacabras than god, but if god could pipe up then we could clear all this up.
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Norquist Nemesis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:45 PM
Response to Original message
11. Mopaul! You're being called to service!
<off topic>

Beyond the Beltway is looking for local people to be on their panel! It airs every Sunday night on TV (30 minutes is shown at 10:30 on PBS) and on the radio for an hour. Are you familiar with them?

Go to www.beyondthebeltway.com to take a look. WE NEED YOU! We need some GOOD, STRONG, LIBERAL VOICES on that panel!

</off topic and back to your regularly scheduled program>
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IrateCitizen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 12:54 PM
Response to Original message
12. God Replies...
Oh yeah -- it's one of those darned "humans" again from that insignificant blue marble at the edge of the Milky Way galaxy....

What is up with you humans, that you think your tiny planet and your egocentric species are somehow the center of the universe in my eyes? It's always, "God give us this," or, "God give us that." Then you go and make up your own stories about what God wants and try and pass them off as things I actually said.

Well, humankind, I've got news for you -- it's a vast universe, nearly infinite by your standards, even if it's pretty modest by mine, and there are a lot more important things to attend to than your petty bickerings and egos. Over there in the Andromeda galaxy, for instance, there's a species that is close to creating a way to travel through time -- I'd better nip that one in the bud before they go and screw EVERYTHING up, they're almost as foolish and reckless as you humans are.

Oh, and by the way, could you tell that Pat Robertson guy to just SHUT UP and quit bothering me? Setting things in motion and then watching everything unfold is enough of a full-time job -- the last thing I need are the constant distractions of him asking me to smite sinners here and assassinate dictators there and ensconce him in a blanket completely lined with diamonds from his buddy Charlie Taylor. I mean, it's enough to make a supreme being go absolutely freaking NUTS!

Sincerely,
God
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mopaul Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 01:54 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. how do i know it's really YOU?
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hunter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 02:07 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. Faith, dear mopaul, faith...
;)
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Bluerthanblue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 02:22 PM
Response to Original message
15. Mo Paul, we all need
a scapegoat.

We all want a 'saviour'- ya know like superman, and bush.

The fact that there could be a 'god' who lets us or watches us f--k up without interfering, isn't unthinkable.

How many of us knew how GOOD a President Clinton actually was before meeting bush?

How many of us have been so hungry, we'd eat almost anything, sucking every drop out of a catsup package, and have learned from it what a feast a peanut butter sandwich is?

How many of us have been so close to death, we welcomed and reached out to it with longing only to live, and know how good it can feel to wake up alive, and relatively healthy?

i could go on, but you get me i'm sure- and i get you.
live is NOT 'fair'- if it were, we'd grow very bored. And when it is not, we need to 'blame' someone or something cause feeling vunerable is sometimes just TOO overwhelming.

peace-
underdog's biggest fan,
blu


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shadowknows69 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 02:24 PM
Response to Original message
16. Awesome Mo
You're my fuckin hero man.
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kliljedahl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 02:51 PM
Response to Original message
18. All the questions the Fundies should ask, & don't
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AuntPatsy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 02:57 PM
Response to Original message
19. Excellent, needs a kick....I've asked a few of them myself.
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ProfessorGAC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 03:10 PM
Response to Original message
21. I Have One Of The Answers, Mo
With regard to why prayers aren't answered; prayers are answered. God likes to say no.
The Professor
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PurityOfEssence Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 03:13 PM
Response to Original message
22. Dear supplicant: I don't exist; stop bothering me
Nobody's pulling your strings and there's no ultimate plan. There's no destiny, afterlife or true fairness.

You're on your own to band together with other adults and try to make things better for everyone. Hand wringing at the confusing displeasure of a superior supernatural whatever is a supreme waste of time.

The good news is that fairmindedness and camaraderie truly do exist; it's up to you to bolster those traits in others and take responsibility. Otherwise, you're going to be swept under by the true forces of nature.

Deal with it.
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PurgedVoter Donating Member (753 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 03:15 PM
Response to Original message
23. Keep it up Mopaul
My evidence says that as long as you hunger and thirst for such knowledge the rest will take care of itself. Oh and seeking may also help.
I suspect that if I were the Divine Being I would be no more impressed with the folk that knew everything about me than I would be with those that knew I didn't exist.
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 03:59 PM
Response to Original message
24. God responds....(my take on how that would happen)
Edited on Thu Aug-25-05 04:18 PM by Lerkfish
first of all, where are you, and where have you been for so long?
--- The bahamas. Its nice, I'm comfortable. They have these drinks called "Bushwhackers" with litte paper umbrellas...oops, just saw an iguana run by....

why don't you ENFORCE the ten commandments, or update them, or add a few or remove a few?

-- Are you kidding? you guys don't follow the ones you already got. Enforcing them runs counter to free will, don'tcha know. I'm not giving you any new commandments until you play nice with the old ones.

when a plane crashes and only two people survive, were you watching over the two survivors only, and why did all the others die? were they not worth saving?
--- If I saved everybody, you'd be neckdeep in very old people. Like methuselah-old. And not all of them could fit in Florida. I gave you a generous lifespan, barring accidents or if one of you decides to kill another of you. Be happy with the time you got. I could make more time, but then we'd be back here again after those extra years were up. Life ain't no guaranteed survival sort of thing. I have other plans for you for afters. i think you might like it.

could you clear up the highly confusing 'free will' argument for us?
why would you create a small percentage of people who are incapable of believing in you, and then send them to eternal damnation?
---whoa, now, thus far no one's been eternally damned. I see a lot of people claiming to follow me who spend a lot of time damning each other, but I'm reserving judgment until the movie's over. Incidentally, I've given you hints that those who act as if under the law, are a law unto themselves. That's your loophole. You live a life of compassion and truth, and you don't have to worry about it. Fuggetaboutit.

did hitler get forgiven for his sins right before he croaked himself, and is he in heaven with mother theresa?
---Lemme tell you, what I have planned for shicklegruber is between him and myself, and you need to be concerned about what is between me and thee, capice? Whoever I choose to forgive is my business. But I don't think he's getting a "get out of jail free" card, if that's what's worrying you.

did you really have to create mosquitos, leeches, viruses, and cancer?
--- I'm a big fan of life. Life is a marvelous thing, and it generates many conundrums. Such is the beauty of it. There are mosquitos and there are butteflies. There are leeches and there are hamsters. There is cancer and there is the body's own healing abilities. Ya get the sour with the sweet, all is part of cycle of life.

which religion best represents you, and which ones don't?
--Any religion that seeks to find ways to love another represents me. Is that really so hard?

why don't you ever answer my prayers?
--- I am, you aren't listening. Sometimes my answer is no. Sometimes I feel lonely because instead of praying to be with me like a son, you come clamoring to me with your hand out for this or that you want me to do for you. God is your father, not your butler. And like your father, I expect you grow up, learning to deal with the realities of life, in order to be stronger. If I protected you from everything, and never had you experience hardship or learn courage or character, what kind of father would I be?

why do you allow the evil george bush to continue slaughtering thousands of your children who believe in you?
-- Why do you? you have the power to stop him yourself. All of you do. There's that freewill thingy again. It also means you have to take responsibility for your own choices.

why are some people born lucky, and others lead horribly miserable lives, why are some healthy and some deformed and crippled?
-- Did you want everyone to be Barbie and Ken? I celebrate the diversity of life and the multiplicity of personhood. Things happen. They happen to a variety of different kinds of people. I am not punishing or rewarding people. Things just happen. How people deal with things is the opportunity to achieve courageous things. Should I have not made Stephen Hawking?

why did you appear to moses, but you won't appear to us, here in the 21st century?
-- I do things in my own mysterious way. When I appeared to people, they didn't follow me any better. They didn't treat other more kindly. I even sent my son, and people killed him. Maybe I thought a different method was more called for. Maybe I AM appearing to people, but they get written off as nutcases. Maybe I prefer to work through people than to frighten them with my awesomeness.

if we are created in your image, why are we so stupid down here?
and why don't we live forever?
-- My son, you created in my spiritual image. Even a down's syndrome child can choose to love or to hate. You are in my image because I gave you the ability to choose. With choice come consequences and rewards. Because I loved you I gave you the ability to choose. I've already answered why you don't live forever up above. However, you don't live forever IN THIS PLANE. I have a better place waiting for you.

do you really need for us to pass the collection plate and raise money?
-- Nope. God has no need of money. A church does not have to ask for money. They can meet in an open field. Wherever two or more are gathered, there am I in the midst of them. I don't need a building.

why do you allow pat robertson to rip off little poor old ladies, and benny hinn too?
-- Why do you? We're going back to the freewill thingy.

what color are you? black, white, red, or yellow?
--- What I am is not physical. What color is love? You are ALL my children.

why are there so many conflicting and opposing religions, instead of one that we can all get behind?
-- Why not? Isn't it interesting to see how different cultures and peoples all find their own way to approach me? I find it interesting. I celebrate life and I also celebrate diversity. I"d prefer diferent religions worked together in a respectful way, but again, freewill allows people to make choices.

why in the hell is there a hell and a devil? that seems so cruel.
--- The jury is still out on that. Some say hell will be a simple separation from Me. Anymore I cannot tell you at this time, except that many of the perceptions of hell and punishment are based on flimsy and obscure passages.

are we supposed to be afraid of you, or love you? which one?
--- I created you for fellowship, that means, like a father, I love you. I want to be with you and I want to see you grow spiritually. I'd prefer you listened to me, and followed my commandments, but I also realize I gave you free will. If you live in only fear of Me, its not going to be a fruitful friendship.

is jesus really coming back, or is that another cruel joke of yours?
--- Do you mean Jesus coming back would be a cruel joke, or that not coming back would be a cruel joke? I swear, I don't get your sense of humor, sometimes, son. Jesus will come back when the time is right, and when he does, I will gather all of you unto me.

which side was right during the crusades?
-- since both sides killed and coerced people against their will, neither was right.

is there other life out there, and why are we so isolated here?
---Yes. and...Because I made space vast.

why did you only have one son, and no daughters?
--- all of you are my sons, all of you are my daughters.

do you have sex like we do, and are certain sexual practices evil, if so, which ones please? and if yes, with whom? is there a mrs. god?
--- I do not have a physical body as you know it. I am both male and female and neither at the same time. I conceived and gave birth to the universe, so I am in that way female.
I have no need of sex. As far as what sex you have, if you are hurting no one, and there is love between you, it is a beautiful thing.


is the end of the world at hand?
--- No one may know the true time of the end, not even Jesus.

and finally, will i be allowed into heaven, seeing as how i've been such a cranky asshole all my life? i've never killed anyone, or robbed anyone, or coveted anything, or worshipped a graven image, but am i still hellbound? you created me, and i'd like some answers please, in either a dream or some dramatic sign.
--- That would be telling.

i'll be waiting,
--- I'm also waiting.

thanks
-- you're welcome.

one of your children
--- and of whom I am well pleased.
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IndyOp Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 10:40 PM
Response to Reply #24
29. Lerkfish - Your responses are so good that they should be on refrigerators
across the nation (right next to 'What I Learned in Kindergarten').

:hi:
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 12:16 AM
Response to Reply #29
32. thanks.
it was enlightening for me to come up with them as well.
It reminded me that how I view God is not as a tyrant, but as a loving parent.
I honestly think he is a lot more interested in us than we realize.

peace.
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WildEyedLiberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 11:31 PM
Response to Reply #24
30. What an amazing post
I wish I could nominate this post for the greatest page.
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Lerkfish Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 12:10 AM
Response to Reply #30
31. I just tried to answer how I think God would...
I feel he has a sense of humor, too.

:)

I also think Mopaul, without realizing it, was helping me, too. By answering those questions as if I were god, it made me really think about them in a way I haven't before.
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Festivito Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 03:59 PM
Response to Original message
25. Those who tell do not know; those who know do not tell.
God included.

Possible answers from someone who does not know:
here.
do.
depends on what you mean by saving.
yup.
you found people incapable of believing?
Let me check... naw.
balance.
none.
What part of no do you not understand?
he's a piece of work.
no sadness: no happiness.
You say I don't?
2nd ? Judgementalism. 1st: same.
Not me. Er, Me.
Free will offering, er, My offering to y'all.
yes.
you're all different.
free will has responsibilty.
yes, both.
yup, nope.
neither.
maybe, would you let you out?
cultural issues.
Hardly, why, kinda.
not yours.
It's questionable.
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Jackpine Radical Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 04:07 PM
Response to Original message
26. OK, YOU LITTLE WORM. HERE ARE YOUR ANSWERS.
first of all, where are you, and where have you been for so long?

I'VE BEEN ON VACATION FOR A FEW MILLENIA. MOSTLY VISITING ANOTHER GOD OVER IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE. WE'VE BEEN CLEARING BRUSH.

why don't you ENFORCE the ten commandments, or update them, or add a few or remove a few?

THOSE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE A JOKE. MOSES DIDN'T GET IT.

when a plane crashes and only two people survive, were you watching over the two survivors only, and why did all the others die? were they not worth saving?

I LEAVE THINGS LIKE THAT UP TO CHANCE. SOMETIMES ST. PETER & JESUS & I BET ON THE OUTCOMES.

could you clear up the highly confusing 'free will' argument for us?

NO.

why would you create a small percentage of people who are incapable of believing in you, and then send them to eternal damnation?

THAT'S SORT OF BACKWARDS. IT'S THE GULLIBLE ONES THAT END UP IN A HELL OF THEIR OWN CREATION.

did hitler get forgiven for his sins right before he croaked himself, and is he in heaven with mother theresa?

I NEITHER CONDEMN NOR FORGIVE PEOPLE. NEITHER HE NOR MOTHER T. IS IN HEAVEN. THEY HAVE TO FIND THEIR OWN WAY HERE, AND THEY HAVE NOT DONE SO AS YET.

did you really have to create mosquitos, leeches, viruses, and cancer?

NO, I DIDN'T HAVE TO. I JUST WANTED TO.

which religion best represents you, and which ones don't?

WELL, MAYBE ANIMISM.

why don't you ever answer my prayers?

I DO, BUT SOMETHING IN YOU DOESN'T LIKE THE ANSWERS & BLOCKS YOU FROM HEARING ME.

why do you allow the evil george bush to continue slaughtering thousands of your children who believe in you?

WELL, BACK TO THAT FREE WILL THING...

why are some people born lucky, and others lead horribly miserable lives, why are some healthy and some deformed and crippled?

BECAUSE "FAIR" ONLOY EXISTS AS THE FIRST FOUR LETTERS IN "FAIRY TALE."

why did you appear to moses, but you won't appear to us, here in the 21st century?

BECAUSE MOSES HAD BETTER MUSHROOMS.


if we are created in your image, why are we so stupid down here?
and why don't we live forever?

YOU ARE NOT CREATED IN MY IMAGE. FAR FROM IT. IF YOU NEED PROOF OF THAT, JUST CONSIDER THAT YOU ARE STUPID AND MORTAL.

do you really need for us to pass the collection plate and raise money?

THINK OF IT AS A STUPIDITY TAX.

why do you allow pat robertson to rip off little poor old ladies, and benny hinn too?

SEE PREVIOUS ANSWER.

what color are you? black, white, red, or yellow?

I'M JEWISH, OF COURSE.

why are there so many conflicting and opposing religions, instead of one that we can all get behind?

YOU'RE ENOUGH OF A PROBLEM WHEN YOU'RE ALL DIVIDED AND AT CROSS-PURPOSES (YOU SHOULD PARDON THE EXPRESSION). IF YOU EVER GOT TRULY ORGANIZED, YOU'D BE DOWNRIGHT DANGEROUS.

why in the hell is there a hell and a devil? that seems so cruel.

SOME PEOPLE HAVE A NEED TO TORTURE THEMSELVES WITH GUILT. WHO AM I TO DENY THEM?

are we supposed to be afraid of you, or love you? which one?

I REALLY DON'T CARE.

is jesus really coming back, or is that another cruel joke of yours?

HE SAYS HE'S BEEN MEANING TO GET BACK THERE, BUT SOMETHING IS ALWAYS COMING UP...

which side was right during the crusades?

WHICH SIDE IS RIGHT IN AN ASS-KICKING CONTEST?

is there other life out there, and why are we so isolated here?

I WAS SORT OF HOPING YOU WOULDN'T ASK, BUT ACTUALLY NOBODY WANTS TO HAVE A LOT TO DO WITH YOU.

why did you only have one son, and no daughters?

WHERE DID YOU GET THAT IDEA? (NEVER MIND, I KNOW WHERE, BUT YOU REALLY OUGHT TO BE MORE DISCRIMINATING ABOUT YOUR SOURCES).

do you have sex like we do, and are certain sexual practices evil, if so, which ones please? and if yes, with whom? is there a mrs. god?

NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS.

is the end of the world at hand?

THAT'S PRETTY MUCH UP TO YOU FOLKS.

and finally, will i be allowed into heaven, seeing as how i've been such a cranky asshole all my life? i've never killed anyone, or robbed anyone, or coveted anything, or worshipped a graven image, but am i still hellbound? you created me, and i'd like some answers please, in either a dream or some dramatic sign.

IT'S NOT ABOUT "ALLOWING." YOU'VE GOT ALL THE PIECES TO THE PUZZLE & YOU HAVE TO PUT IT TOGETHER INTO YOUR OWN MAP.
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crispini Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 12:22 AM
Response to Reply #26
33. Niiiiice!
:thumbsup: Who knew God was such a radical!
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NAO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-25-05 09:47 PM
Response to Original message
27. Some REALLY Hard Questons for God about that Flood Thingy

What did God know and When did he know it??



from Some Mistakes Of Moses
Robert G. Ingersoll

http://www.infidels.org/library/historical/robert_ingersoll/some_mistakes_of_moses.html

From this account it seems that driving Adam and Eve out of
Eden did not have the effect to improve them or their children. On
the contrary, the world grew worse and worse. They were under the
immediate control and government of God, and he from time to time
made known his will; but in spite of this, man continued to
increase in crime.

Nothing in particular seems to have been done. Not a school
was established. There was no written language. There was not a
Bible in the world. The "scheme of salvation" was kept a profound
secret. The five points of Calvinism had not been taught. Sunday
schools had not been opened. In short, nothing had been done for
the reformation of the world. God did not even keep his own sons at
home, but allowed them to leave their abode in the firmament, and
make love to the daughters of men. As a result of this, the world
was filled with wickedness and giants to such an extent that God
regretted "that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at
his heart."

Of course God knew when he made man, that he would afterwards
regret it. He knew that the people would grow worse and worse until
destruction would be the only remedy. He knew that he would have to
kill all except Noah and his family, and it is hard to see why he
did not make Noah and his family in the first place, and leave Adam
and Eve in the original dust. He knew that they would be tempted,
that he would have to drive them out of the garden to keep them
from eating of the tree of life; that the whole thing would be a
failure; that Satan would defeat his plan; that he could not reform
the people; that his own sons would corrupt them, and that at last
he would have to drown them all except Noah and his family.

Why was the Garden of Eden planted?

Why was the experiment made?

Why were Adam and Eve exposed to the seductive arts of the serpent?

Why did God wait until the cool of the day before looking after his
children?

Why was he not on hand in the morning?

Why did he fill the world with his own children, knowing that he would have to destroy them?

And why does this same God tell me how to raise my
children when he had to drown his?



It is a little curious that when God wished to reform the
ante-diluvian world he said nothing about hell; that he had no
revivals, no camp-meetings, no tracts, no outpourings of the Holy
Ghost, no baptisms, no noon prayer meetings, and never mentioned
the great doctrine of salvation by faith. If the orthodox creeds of
the world are true, all those people want to hell without ever
having heard that such a place existed. If eternal torment is a
fact, surely these miserable wretches ought to have been warned.
They were threatened only with water when they were in fact doomed
to eternal fire!

Is it not strange that God said nothing to Adam and Eve about
a future life; that he should have kept these "infinite verities"
to himself and allowed millions to live and die without the hope of
heaven, or the fear of hell?"

It is hard to see why God did not civilize these people. He
certainly had the power to use, and the wisdom, to devise the
proper means.

What right has a god to fill a world with fiends?

Can there be goodness in this?

Why should he make experiments that he knows must fail?
Is there wisdom in this?

And what right has a man to charge an infinite being with wickedness and folly?



According to Moses, God made up his mind not only to destroy
the people, but the beasts and the creeping things, and the fowls
of the air.

What had creeping things, and the fowls of the air done?

What had the beasts, and the birds done to excite the anger of God?

Why did he repent having made them?

Will some Christian give us an explanation of this matter?

No good man will inflict unnecessary pain upon a beast; how then can we worship a god who cares nothing for the agonies of the dumb creatures that he made?


Why did he make animals that he knew he would destroy?

Does God delight in causing pain?


He had the power to make the beasts, and fowls, and creeping things in his own good time and way, and it is to be presumed that he made them according to his wish.

Why should he destroy them?

They had committed no sin. They had eaten no forbidden fruit, made no aprons, nor tried to reach the tree of life. Yet this god, in blind unreasoning wrath destroyed "all flesh wherein was the breath of life, and every living thing beneath the sky, and every substance wherein was life that he had made."

Robert G. Ingersoll
http://www.infidels.org/library/historical/robert_ingersoll/index.shtml
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OxQQme Donating Member (694 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 01:17 AM
Response to Reply #27
34. Ken Wilber
I just finished reading 'Boomeritis" by Ken Wilber.
He seems to describe the angst that we 'blues' feel very accurately.
Also describes the 'red' state that all living souls experience. Reds are STUCK in their beliefs or would pass into blue. It's a choice.
It is a tale of the evolution of the social concsience, individualy and en-masse. From individual to family to village to state etc. All the way out to the complete globe's collective conscience operating as one.
We assimilate and create our own path depending on wether we accept or reject incoming events and situations.
'Green' is the next evo state for the 'collective' and/or individual. Green is not obtainable without going through the red and blue as the empathy would be missing. Green goes beyond the individual, to caring for the welfare of ALL. Patriotism and nationalism fall away in 'green'.
There are 'color steps' beyond green that require a revelatory leap in conscience that only reading the book could best describe.
Narcisisim is the root negative value in all the 'color' steps.
I've not yet researched but it may be that Mr Wilber coined the 'red state/blue state' meme that we all are aware of.
Thanks for listening.
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NAO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 01:22 AM
Response to Reply #34
36. I've read lots of Ken Wilber, but not 'Boomeritis'.
I've read 'Sex, Ecology, Spirituality' several times, as well as the shorter 'Brief History of Everything' and a few of the earlier works. Can't say that I've seen the red/blue state thing in Wilber, unless you really want to psychologize it. I think it's more fairly described as sets of values/perspectives, and I don't know if it's fair to rank it hierarchically (as Wilber ranks everything).
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OxQQme Donating Member (694 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 01:32 AM
Response to Reply #34
37. Oh, and about that flood thingy....
if you were to read Zecharia Sitchin's "Genesis Revisited" you may end up with a different feeling about "The Flood".
Imagine the moon passing over the earth. Gravitational attraction 'lifts' the waters into the high tides as it passes by overhead. (Does the same to the dirt and rocks but to a lesser degree.)
Now imagine a much larger mass (a planet) passing through our part of the galaxy in close enough proximity to 'un-weight' the ice mass that sits on bedrock at our southern pole and chunks break off and fall into the oceans causing tsunamis thousands of feet high rolling northward along the eastern shore of the african continent and inundating the whole of mesopotamia and indus plains.
Now imagine knowing in advance this was going to take place and gathering up all of your exploratory team and leaving the earth to wait it out.
Thanks for listening.
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Mr Rabble Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 01:19 AM
Response to Original message
35. mopaul rocks again. And, there is no god. Film at 11:00.
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DanCa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 02:03 AM
Response to Reply #35
39. Mopaul rocks dont care if i agree with him all the time or not :D
You rock mopaul :D :beer:
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DanCa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-26-05 02:01 AM
Response to Original message
38. The boss sez
A Reason to Believe Bruce Springsteen. live 1975-1985

Seen a man standin' over a dead dog lyin' by the highway in a ditch
He's lookin' down kinda puzzled pokin' that dog with a stick
Got his car door flung open he's standin' out on highway 31
Like if he stood there long enough that dog'd get up and run
Struck me kinda funny seem kinda funny sir to me
Still at the end of every hard earned day people find some reason to believe

Now Mary Lou loved Johnny with a love mean and true
She said "Baby I'll work for you every day and bring my money home to you"
One day he up and left her and ever since that
She waits down at the end of that dirt road for young Johnny to come back
Struck me kinda funny seemed kind of funny sir to me
How at the end of every hard earned day people find some reason to believe

Take a baby to the river Kyle William they called him
Wash the baby in the water take away little Kyle's sin
In a whitewash shotgun shack an old man passes away take his body to the graveyard and over him they pray Lord won't you tell us
tell us what does it mean
Still at the end of every hard earned day people find some reason to believe

Congregation gathers down by the riverside
Preacher stands with his Bible groom stands waitin' for his bride
Congregation gone and the sun sets behind a weepin' willow tree
Groom stands alone and watches the river rush on so effortlessly
Wonderin' where can his baby be still at the end of every hard earned day people find some reason to believe
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