iamjoy
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:09 AM
Original message |
Co-Worker's Rita Comment: Funny Or Not Funny |
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One of my co-workers has told me her daughter isn't talking to her.
Last night, my co-worker got home very late after not watching the news all day. Her 17 year old daughter was in tears, so she asked what was wrong. Turns out the daughter is worried about her father (my co-worker's ex-husband) because he is in Houston. The rest of the family there is evacuating, but he is a police officer, so he can't leave. My co-worker tries to comfort her daughter, saying he always seems to come out of things okay and knew how to protect himself. So, the daughter says, "yes, but what if Houston floods?" and my co-worker quips, "He knows how to swim."
At which point, the daughter stalks off and slams the door to her room.
Was her comment funny or not funny? I say funny, but then, I like dark humor.
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GreenPartyVoter
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:10 AM
Response to Original message |
1. Obviously not funny to the kid.. and that's what counts here. I understand |
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mom was aiming to lighten up the situation, but the whole scenario is so grim I don't think it is possible.
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terip64
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:15 AM
Response to Reply #1 |
8. Having had 2 teenager daughters at one time |
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lightening things up for them when they are truly worried about something is not at all possible. They see you as being cold and all knowing, which is your worst nightmare. It took me a long time to realize that you really could just keep saying things such as , "I know your worried, it will be ok, take a deep breath..." and no matter what, don't try to make light of it. They take it as an insult.
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terip64
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:10 AM
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2. Not funny if you were talking about my dad... |
Maclilly
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:12 AM
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what else is she supposed to say. I have two girls. Sometimes you just can't say anything without them going off in hysterics. (He knows how to swim I amsure he can swim to safety.) very funny.
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Pirate Smile
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:12 AM
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4. Nope. The daughter was upset and needed comforting not jokes. |
edbermac
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:13 AM
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5. Not funny, sounds like she issues with her ex... |
iamjoy
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:19 AM
Response to Reply #5 |
13. It Wasn't A Good Marriage |
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And, she had just been in jury duty for a criminal trial for three days, so she was pretty tired when she got home.
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Fleshdancer
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:13 AM
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6. That relationship will be in real danger if Dad gets hurt... |
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the joke was in very poor taste IMO.
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MamaBear
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:15 AM
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7. Evidently not to her daughter |
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I understand her wanting to inject a bit of levity into a scary situation. I understand her daughter's reaction.
No judgment here ... just a miscommunication between mother and daughter.
Haven't we all had those? :shrug:
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Maclilly
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:17 AM
Response to Reply #7 |
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what else would she say? He can swim. Daughter is being too too sensitive. Trust me, teen girls, you can't say boo to them when they are upset. SHe could sit and baby her and no matter what that kid would find SOMETHING to get up and pound off about.
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MamaBear
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:22 AM
Response to Reply #10 |
14. She rolled the dice on a joke and lost. |
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No permanent harm, no foul. Seventeen year old young women are emotionally fragile sometimes. Maybe Mom was trying to find courage in humor.
Is there a point in getting into a she-should-have argument here? I'm sure they'll pull together and get through the crisis.
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demnan
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:16 AM
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9. One of those things that sounds inappropriate |
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but probably wasn't thought through. I would suggest that the daughter call her Dad and talk to him directly. Then he can reassure her that he's taking precautions.
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Modem Butterfly
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:17 AM
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11. Funny if it's your ex |
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Not so funny if it's your dad.
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rurallib
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:18 AM
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12. Gallows humor - sometimes hard to take |
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usually meant to lighten a tense situation, not meant to be mean spirited, but can backfire.
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GoldenOldie
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:25 AM
Response to Reply #12 |
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After the 24/7 news complete with pics coming out of NO this young girl is not thinking this a funny.
I am sure her mother's intent was to ease her mind but having visions of NO bodies floating face down, already planted in her brain, it is easy for her to think of her dad in that situation.
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TahitiNut
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:24 AM
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15. Look on the bright side. It was better than saying "Shit floats!" |
DS1
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:26 AM
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MamaBear
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:31 AM
Response to Reply #15 |
ernstbass
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:24 AM
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certainly not much consolation to the daughter who is worried about her dad. How callous.
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ohio_liberal
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:27 AM
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LeftyMom
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:27 AM
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20. I can't picture my parents saying something like that about each other |
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and they don't get along at all. What she said was really insensitive to her daughter's feelings and not even slightly funny.
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blondeatlast
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:27 AM
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21. Under the circumstances, not funny.Dark humor has its place, but it's |
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place is decidedly NOT when someone is already crushed by fear.
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daninthemoon
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:29 AM
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22. If her daughter was a teen , that's probably how the converstion |
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was going to end no matter what mom said. I think it's a good thing if dad can swim. Sounds like encouragement to me.
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Straight Shooter
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:37 AM
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24. Not funny. Many of those who drowned in New Orleans knew how to swim. |
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I like dark humor, too, but not in this situation. The girl wanted comfort, not a joke.
God forbid something happen to the father. The mother's words will echo like a torment forever.
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Darth_Kitten
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Thu Sep-22-05 10:39 AM
Response to Original message |
25. insensitive......especially to a worried child. |
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Your co-worker sounds like a bit of an dolt.
Sorry, I like dark humour, but this is a bit cruel. :( Just rubs me the wrong way. :(
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Geoff R. Casavant
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Thu Sep-22-05 11:04 AM
Response to Original message |
26. Under the circumstances |
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it was not funny. Still, people react different ways to different situations, and I expect the comment was meant insultingly.
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