Christmas trees shoved up homeowner's @ss is all the rage.

[PretzelWarrior]

November 28, 2005
Scarsdale, New York

In a growing sign of the frustration many Americans are dealing with as they face up to a stress-filled, vacuous, and voraciously materialistic Christmas season, more and more Christmas trees are being violently deposited in homeowners' nether regions. Often, this practice is instigated by angry neighbors who deplore the 500 million candle power lighting being erected by said homeowner or who are sick to death of the ever larger inflatable Christmas shit cluttering the neighborhood.

In the south, relatives are getting into the "Tannenbaum up the bum" rage. Literal rage. Southern folk have enumerated excuses as varied as argument over which NASCAR driver is the real second coming of Jesus to whether Larry the Cable Guy is cuter than Bo Bice....

continued on page A26

[JohnnyRingo]

1. "Git-R-Done" ..... Whatta red state dumbass

I hope he regrets forever saying that.
I hope it becomes his own personal hell. Not regular Hell, but the special Hell like "Do You Feel" is for Peter Framton, or "Free Bird" for Skynard.

After seeing him pitch Moore's "Fh-911" over his shoulder last year on Leno, I have an urge to shove a "Holiday Tree" up his fat butt......
But then it could just be seasonal stress.

[PretzelWarrior]

2. exactly. the man should be forced to say that for $50 appearance fee

when he's 80. all wrinkled and still wearing overalls and cutoff western cut shirt. LOL. what a friggin' poster child for stupid America.

[Sapphocrat]

3. ...

:spray:
:rofl:

[wake.up.america]

4. I am like totally lost. I understood close to zero. It is not you...

It's me. Would someone please explain what the initial post was all about?

[Flubadubya]

5. And who is this person referrenced by post #1 and #2?

The OP doesn't mention the "purported perp" by name at all. This really is confusing. :shrug: ????

[WCGreen]

6. Larry the Cable Guy....

A "comedian" who has a catch phrase, and not much else...

He palls around with Bill Invelgas and Jeff Foxworthy...

You might be a redneck.....

[Sapphocrat]

8. And "Git-R-Done"...

...is the latest stupid thing found on millions of bumper stickers, T-shirts, Web sites, and posts on sub-par forums by idiots who think they're being cool (which is like a 53-year-old stockbroker being cool by using examples of hip-hop jargon he found in the Urban Slang Dictionary while trying to have a deep, meaningful conversation with his 14-year-old son).

This too, we hope, shall pass.

[wake.up.america]

10. Thanks,

[zbdent]

11. Bill Engvall, Jeff Foxworthy, and Ron White all agree

that Larry's act is not an act, but really how Larry is . . . an embarassment . . .

As Ron White repeatedly says, "He's a complete homophobe, and I can't believe I'm not gay . . ."

[WCGreen]

12. Thanks for getting the name right....

[zbdent]

14. Have you noticed that the verified rightwinger of the quartet

(and he is adamant in his support of this war, er, pResident) is the one who uses the most potty humor of them all?

[Sapphocrat]

7. There was a post in GD sometime Monday...

...about the latest trend of buying Christmas trees designed to be hung upside down, from the ceiling (not because the owners are Poseidon Adventure fanatics, but to save floor space, or some such silly reason).

And a couple of days ago, there was another long (GD) thread about the most amazing home Christmas display in the world, with zillions of lights...

Put those together, and I believe the OP was registering utter disgust at crass commercialism, people's willingness to follow any dumb trend that comes along, other people's greed to make a buck off said willingness, and the gross wastefulness of consumption (both of the materialistic and the electrical variety, the latter especially when we're practically in another "energy crisis").

And the OP struck me as the funniest thing I'd heard all day. I'm still chuckling at it. :)

[PretzelWarrior]

15. sorry about that.

people below have done a good job of stating who "Larry the Cable Guy" is.

and yes...it is a bit of a non sequitur post if you didn't see the other ones discussing upside down trees, yada yada yada.

I'm just so sick of the crass commercialism of Christmas, but it is amazing to me that those rat bastards are now trying to somehow dupe regular Americans into believing this is a "Dem/Lib/Secularist" thing rather than blaming the "MONEY IS EVERYTHING" corporations.

The richest ads in the world for irony are the Citigroup ones with wonderful vignettes of people enjoying what's REALLY important about life....money not important. Don't sweat getting ahead. enjoy the small things--but they are advertising precisely because they are in competition with other loan shark credit companies to prey upon americans who seem to have NO stop button when it comes to spending above their income--ESPECIALLY around the holidays.

[0007]

9. Got a link so I can continue on page A26? The

first part of the story is on what page again?

[tx_dem41]

13. Hey...can you privide a link to page A26?....

I was enjoying that article.

:) and a ;)