Really bad names for a child

[Rabrrrrrr]

I'll start with some I wouldn't wish any child:

• Sir Miniscule Penis
  
• Vomit
  
• Leprotic Filth
  
• Embarassing Condom-less Evening's Mistake
  
• Whores Around
  
• Ruined Our Relationship
  
• Wish-She'd-Never-Been-Born
  
• Money Blackhole
  
• Something (which happened when the father looked at the nurse and said, "I don't @*$^@ care what his name is, just put something on the birth certificate and be done with it."
  
• Anal Dicharge
  
• Not Worth the Fifteen Minutes of Sexual Ecstacy
  
• Susie with the Teeny Penis
  
• Liberace
  
• Adopted Not-Even-Lovable-Enough-By-Her-Parents Child No. 7
  
• Bedwetting Jesus Hater
  
• Dreary Fat Boring Old
  
• Lying Little Two-faced
  
  
  Any more you can think of? (and yeah, I stole the last two from Monty Python, but damned if I can think of the father's name... can anyone help?)
  

[hlthe2b]

1. NOSMO KING, SHIT HAID, FOMICA DINETTE

I know the first and third are absolutely real; the second, I have heard repeatedly.

[LastKnight]

20. ive heard a variant of the second...

spelled exactly like what it really is "Shithead" but prounoced like "sha-thed"

-LK

[pentalarc]

2. the missing Python name

If I remember correctly, the father was Snivelling Little Rat Faced.

Pentalarc

[Rabrrrrrr]

4. That's it!

Thanks!

Man, I was going crazy because I couldn't think of it.

wonderful visions of John Cleese, as Dreaqry Fat boring Old, coughing up and hacking a huge load of phelgm into her purse. Hilarious!

[rhino47]

17. Hiya pentalarc Welcome to DU

:hi::hi::hi::hi::hi::hi::hi::hi::hi:

[PittPoliSci]

18. welcome to du!

:kick:

:dem:

[baldguy]

26. The Gits!

Lovely couple, really.

[Eye and Monkey]

3. Never give your child "Wayne" as a middle name.

http://www.newsoftheweird.com/wayne.html

Wayne" was a popular middle name among a few of the most heinous murderers of our time, e.g., the clown John Wayne Gacy (who killed almost three dozen boys and young men in the late 1970s and buried most of them beneath the floorboards of his Des Plaines, Ill., home) and Elmer Wayne Henley (sentenced to six consecutive life terms in 1974 in Houston for his role, with ringleader Dean Allen Corll, in the murders of 27 young men). I began to publish periodic lists in 1996, and soon readers made sure I never missed a one that made the news.

This is a mighty impressive (so to speak) group, and below is an alpha listing:

Timothy Wayne Adams (Texas)
Thomas Wayne Akers (North Carolina)
Stephen Wayne Anderson (California)*
Joshua Wayne Andrews (Virginia)
David Wayne Arisman (California)
Timothy Wayne Barnett (Alabama)
Gerald Wayne Bivins (Indiana)
Scott Wayne Blystone (Pennsylvania)
Steven Wayne Bowman (South Carolina)
Ricky Wayne Brown (Florida)
Michael Wayne Brown (Oklahoma)
Bradley Wayne Cagle (Texas)
Seth Wayne Campbell (Texas)
Darren Wayne Campbell (Oregon)
Mark Wayne Campmire (Connecticut)
Ronald Wayne Clark, Jr. (Florida)
Douglas Wayne Clark (Texas)
Darryl Wayne Claughton (Alberta)
Kevin Wayne Coffey (Texas)
Michael Wayne Cole (North Carolina)
Joseph Wayne Cook (North Carolina)
Billy Wayne Cope (South Carolina)
Alvin Wayne Crane (Texas)*
David Wayne Crews (Tennessee)
Donald Wayne Darling II (Alabama)
Christopher Wayne Davis (Louisiana)
Gary Wayne Davis (Kentucky)
Jerry Wayne Dean (Kentucky)
Gary Wayne Drinkard (Arizona) (ACQUITTED at retrial after 5 years on death row)
Aryan Wayne Duntley (California)
John Wayne Duvall (Oklahoma)*
Dennis Wayne Eaton (Virginia)*
Dale Wayne Eaton (Colorado)
Michael Wayne Eggers (Alabama)
Gary Wayne Etheridge (Texas)
Michael Wayne Farmer (Maryland)
Ellis Wayne Felker (Georgia)*
Michael Wayne Fisher (Pennsylvania)
Terry Wayne Freeman (Illinois)
Percy Wayne Froman (Alabama)
Ronald Wayne Frye (North Carolina)*
Morris Wayne Givens (Alabama)
Richard Wayne Godwin (Oregon)
Arthur Wayne Goodman, Jr. (Texas)
Richard Wayne Gorrie (New Zealand)
Jeffrey Wayne Gorton (Michigan)
Coleman Wayne Gray (Virginia)*
Christopher Wayne Gregory (Texas)
Ralph Wayne Grimes (Kentucky)
Anthony Wayne Grimm (Illinois)
Randall Wayne Hafdahl (Texas)*
Conan Wayne Hale (Oregon)
Kenneth Wayne Hall Sr. (South Carolina)
Michael Wayne Hall (Texas)
Steven Wayne Hall (Alabama)
Jerald Wayne Harjo (Oklahoma)*
Robert Wayne Harris (Texas)
Carl Wayne Heath (Maine)
Brandon Wayne Hedrick (Virginia)
Michael Wayne Henry (Texas)
Rodney Wayne Henry (Kansas)
Donald Wayne Holt (Maryland)
Bryant Wayne Howard (Oregon)
Kenneth Wayne Jackson (Texas)
Allen Wayne Jenecka (Texas)*
Mark Wayne Jennings (Virginia)
Robert Wayne Jiles (New York)
Terry Wayne Johnson (Florida)
Jason Wayne Johnson (Texas)
Mark Wayne Jones (Ohio)
Bruce Wayne Koenig (Maryland)
Derrick Wayne Kualapai, Sr. (California)
Dudley Wayne Kyzer (Alabama)
Monty Wayne Lamb (Texas)
Jeffrey Wayne Leaf (Oklahoma)
Christopher Wayne Lippard (North Carolina)
Kenny Wayne Lockwood (Texas)*
Mark Wayne Lomax (Texas)
Shelly Wayne Martin (Maryland)
Donald Wayne Martin (Texas)*
Steven Wayne McBride (Minnesota)
George Wayne McBroom (Arizona)
David Wayne McCall (Texas)
Rocky Wayne McGowan (Kentucky)
Jason Wayne McVean (Colorado)
Wesley Wayne Miller (Texas)
Jimmy Wayne Miller (Texas)
John Wayne Moore, Jr. (Missouri)
John Wayne Moses (North Carolina)
Jack Wayne Napier (Kentucky)
Danny Wayne Owens (Alabama)
Bryan Wayne Padd (Arizona)
David Wayne Pallister (England)
Jeffrey Wayne Paschall (Utah)
Michael Wayne Perry (Tennessee)
Jason Wayne Petershagen (Texas)
Curtis Wayne Pope (Texas)
Donald Wayne Rainey (Mexico)
Randy Wayne Richards (Canada)
Robert Wayne Rotramel (Oklahoma)
David Wayne Satterfield (Texas)
Christopher Wayne Scarber (Kentucky)
Michael Wayne Sears (Virginia)
Dallas Wayne Shults (Tennessee)
Mark Wayne Silvers (South Carolina)
David Wayne Smith (Virginia)
Daryl Wayne Smith (West Virginia)
Richard Wayne Smith (Texas)*
Richard Wayne Snell (Arkansas)*
Richard Wayne Spicknall (Alabama)
Randall Wayne Stevens (Illinois)
John Wayne Stockdall (Missouri)
Michael Wayne Summers (Missouri)
Gary Wayne Sutton (Tennessee)
Bobby Wayne Swisher (Virginia)*
Michael Wayne Thompson (Indiana)
Andrew Wayne Toler (Texas)
Robert Wayne Vickers (Arizona)*
Billy Wayne Waldrop (Alabama)*
Jerry Wayne Walker (Kentucky)
Anthony Wayne Walker (Ohio)
Daniel Wayne Warfield (Virginia)
Louis Wayne Watters, Jr. (Texas)
Coy Wayne Wesbrook (Texas)
Larry Wayne White (Texas)*
Michael Wayne Williams (Virginia)
Richard Wayne Willoughby (Maryland)
Kenneth Wayne Woodfin (Virginia)
Bobby Wayne Woods (Texas)
Darrell Wayne Wright (Texas)
William Wayne Wright (Texas)

[Rabrrrrrr]

6. Yow!!

That's a lot of 'em!!

Glad I don't know anyone with Wayne as a middle name...

Amazing!

What are the asterisks for?

[PartyPooper]

11. Once as a child I knew a "Wayne". He threw rocks at me.

I'm sure he is a Republican. His sister was named Cynthia.

:-(

[CO Liberal]

24. I Wish You Hadn't Said That....

My father was "Edmund Edward" - I'm "Wayne Edward". My first wife didn't like the name "Edward", so we named our son "Glynn Wayne"....

[baldguy]

27. George Wayne Bush

It all makes sense now.

[justjones]

5. Apple.

Is it just me, or did Gwyneth's epidural not wear off before she and Chris named that child.....

[Rabrrrrrr]

8. It's funny, but there was a thread just a few days ago

with a poll of bad names, but all real names and attributed to the famous people who named their children with that name. Apple was on that list. Then, just a couple days ago, I was standing waiting for a train in the subway, and overheard a couple people talking about what a stupid name "Apple" was and wondering what the hell was wrong with Gwyneth when she named her child that.

[Eye and Monkey]

9. I know a guy named Apple. Irish family, "apple o' his daddy's eyes".

For this guy, it works.

[sundog]

16. yes, this has me deeply disturbed as well, and I don't know why...

---

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

7. Do not under any circumstances name your little daughter

Slutsickle

[Whoa_Nelly]

19. Cinderella was originally titled

CinderSlut--meaning the girl who attends to the fireplace ashes.

Meanwhile...would not name my child to match last name.
Years ago, saw on Johnny Carson show three children with the last name of Tree:
Mary Christmas Tree
Douglas Fir Tree
Scot Pine Tree

Poor kids...

[ronzo]

10. Gronk?

Just askin'...

:toast:

[Jackhammer Jesus]

12. "Leprotic Filth" would make a great name for a black metal band.

...as would "Sir Miniscule Penis."

[Rabrrrrrr]

22. They would, wouldn't they?

hadn't thought of it... well, if you see any bands with those names, you know who came up with them first. :-)

[EstimatedProphet]

13. I think "fucktard" would be a poor name

Along with "cum dumpster" and "Social parasite".

[Donkeyboy75]

14. "Accident," "Whoops" or "Boo-Boo"

[TheWizardOfMudd]

15. That would be funny if anyone ever gave their child one of those names

[MikeG]

21. the can be a good or bad middle name.

Alexander the Great.
Smokey the Bear.
Jack the Ripper.

[CO Liberal]

23. "George Walker"

I pity any kid that gets stuck with that moniker by their brain-dead RepubliKKKan parents.

[CO Liberal]

25. "Kunte Kinte"

My sister used to work as a substitute teacher in NJ back in the '80s. "Kunte Kinte Jackson" was a small black child in one of her classes, obviously born around the time "Roots" was shown on TV the first time.

I remember telling her it was a good thing his last name didn't also start with a "K" - he'd never be able to get monogrammed shirts!!!

:-)

[baldguy]

28. Poor kid!

He probably changed it to something normal, like "Bill" or "Herman" when he grew up.

[baldguy]

29. I was in line at the supermarket yesterday.

A very pregnant NASCAR-mom was behind me talking to her sister (or mom or cousin or whatever) about the kid's name.

"I like the name 'Georgia' but he like 'Savannah'. I think we'll call her 'Savannah Georgia'. Whatdayathink?"