WannaJumpMyScooter
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Mon Jun-07-04 04:23 PM
Original message |
Newly published schedule of events for GOP NYC this summer |
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New York 2004
6:00 PM Opening Prayer led by the Reverend Jerry Falwell
6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance
6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd amendment)
6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing
6:46 PM Seminar #1: "Getting your kid a military deferment"
7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong
7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries
7:40 PM EPA Address #1: Mercury, it's what's for dinner.
8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next
8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh
8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: "The Homos Are After Your Children"
8:30 PM Round table discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only)
8:50 PM Seminar #2 Corporations: The government of the future
9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man"
9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong
9:10 PM EPA Address #2: "Trees: The real cause of forest fires"
9:30 PM Break for secret meetings
10:00 PM Second prayer led by Cal Thomas
10:15 PM Lecture by Carl Rove: Doublespeak made easy
10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration of how to squint and talk macho
10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark deer-in-headlights stare
10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity belt
10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black Republicans
10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong
10:50 PM Seminar #3: "Education: A drain on our nation's economy"
11:10 PM Hilary Clinton piñata
11:20 PM Second Lecture by John Ashcroft: "Evolutionists -- The Dangerous new cult"
11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again.
11:35 PM Blame Clinton
11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies
11:50 PM Closing Prayer led by Jesus Himself
12:00 AM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord
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WannaJumpMyScooter
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Mon Jun-07-04 10:39 PM
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WannaJumpMyScooter
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Tue Jun-08-04 03:49 PM
Response to Original message |
2. No one thought this was funny? |
bif
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Tue Jun-08-04 03:54 PM
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5. It's not that it isn't funny |
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But it's been posted about a million times. And I've gotten it from at least 20 people over the last 6 months.But okay, I'll call you eddY if you want!
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WannaJumpMyScooter
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Tue Jun-08-04 04:49 PM
Response to Reply #5 |
7. Oh. first I have seen it... I guess I am behind on this one |
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Wow, I feel so.... out of the loop.
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buddhamama
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Tue Jun-08-04 03:52 PM
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10:45- what a hoot
:thumbsup:
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commander bunnypants
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Tue Jun-08-04 03:52 PM
Response to Original message |
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Presidential beer bongs and a hillary pinata.
Dont forget the course on better living through environmental chemicals and the sun who needs it
DDQM
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sasquatch
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Tue Jun-08-04 03:56 PM
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6. What no snakehandling?!?!? |
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Can't have a Good Ol'boy Party without the burlap sack full of rattlesnakes.:silly:
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jmowreader
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Tue Jun-08-04 05:33 PM
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8. I don't believe it for a second |
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Not enough beer bongs, no class on scoring Oxys, nothing on tax cuts. And it takes almost six hours to blame Clinton for anything?
Go back, rewrite this to suit reality and come back quick with it.
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DU
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Fri May 03rd 2024, 03:26 AM
Response to Original message |