My co-worker is a selfish bastard

[VelmaD]

Because of the "Reagan holiday" most of the people in my office are out today. (It's a "skeleton" holiday where we just have to have someone here to catch the phones.)

Anyway, it's just me and him in here most of the day today. He knows that and he still doesn't bother to tell me when he's leaving the office or where he's going or how long he's going to be gone. And he has his headphones on right now so that he can't even hear the phone if it rings. Honestly, I wish he hadn't even bothered to come in. It would be easier and less stressful to just be here by myself and KNOW that I didn't have any backup rather than having crappy half-assed backup.

Can I hit him on the head with a shovel? Please?

[LiberalVoice]

1. You want I should break his legs?(Insert Jersey Accent) n/t

[VelmaD]

4. Yes please...

Thanks. :)

[Cassandra]

13. You mean, Joisey

Yeh

[name not needed]

26. Only people from the Bronx and Texas actually say "Joisey"

[Cassandra]

27. I grew up in Riverdale...

close enough?

[ablbodyed]

2. Give him some KY and....

a vibrator.

[VelmaD]

5. Eeeeeewwwww...

not that I personally have anything against ky and vibrators...but he's just...ewwwwwwww.

Gotta go wash that mental image outta my brain.

[FarLeftRage]

3. At my workplace

we're also down to "skeleton" staff...

However, my co-workers (3 others) are a bit more gracious than that.

Go ahead, whack him one on the side of his thick skull...

[VelmaD]

6. I hope he catches the phones...

while I go out to the car to grab a tire iron. :evilgrin:

[FarLeftRage]

20. Does he still have those earphones on?

Maybe he won't hear you go out for the tire iron...

[VelmaD]

21. Probably not...

on top of having on the headphones, he's seriously hard of hearing anyway. And he doesn't pay attention to what's going on around him. I could probably go out and get a tank and drive it back into the office and he wouldn't notice.

[HEyHEY]

7. You asking for my permission?

Sure - smack him.

[VelmaD]

8. *big smooch*

Thanks. I always feel better if I have SOMEONE'S permission first. A signed form from my mother would be better but if anyone asks I'll just say "HEyHEy said I could". :)

[Richardo]

18. Tell him a Texas taxpayer INSISTS you do it...

Here!

[VelmaD]

19. WOOHOO!!!

Let the Shovel Beatings begin.

Look out HR department...you're next muthafuckers!!!

[johnnie]

9. Tell him you aren't feeling well

And go home for the rest of the day. Then call him every few minutes and hang up on him.

[VelmaD]

10. My boss would plotz

Unless I throw up on her shoes when she comes back from lunch I don't see myself getting out of here today.

[SOteric]

11. Then how 'bout

you take a long, unscheduled coffee break without telling putzboy where you're going or how long you'll be...?

[VelmaD]

14. I wish I could be that mean...

dammit why do I have to be a nice person. x(

[TX-RAT]

12. Give us his phone Number

We'll take care of him.

[VelmaD]

15. Well...

with the headphones on he wouldn't hear the phone anyway...so I'd end up picking up the call.

But thanks for the offer.

[WilliamPitt]

16. Go home.

[VelmaD]

17. Can't

I promised my boss I'd work today and take care of the office and I have this silly sense of responsibility. Gets in the way of having fun and doing what I want. (You'd know all about that. ;))

[Tom_Foolery]

22. Is he your superior? n/t

[VelmaD]

23. Nope

Not since he got demoted for being a fuckin' idiot a few months ago. :evilgrin:

[Touchdown]

24. Hey! I'm doing my job, Little Miss Get some Gang up Friends on Me!

And just how much time do YOU spend here, Chit-chatting away while I'm manning the phones , HMMMMMMMMM? How many DU posts do you have a day compared to me? We've got an answering service, so don't answer it! What's yer' problem? Martyr, martyr, martyr. Is it MY fault you brought your crappy Lean Cuisine, and have no reason to go out? And another thing. If I hear one more "tsk" out of you the rest of the day, you'll be sitting here all alone without anybody else to complain about or roll your eyes at! Yes I see you do that, so don't lie! How's them apples?

PS: I am not Velma's co-worker. I just thought it's be fun if he was a DUer and saw this.:evilgrin:

[VelmaD]

25. If he was a DUer this day would be better...

we could sit here and whine together about the Reagasm. But alas, no. *sigh*