My Wife has turned into a GRAMMAR NAZI

[La Lioness Priyanka]

what should i do with her?

[Misunderestimator]

1. Thank her.

:)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

2. sorry, but no!

[Misunderestimator]

8. Why? You like being wrong?

:)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

10. no i am obstinate and a bit of a jerk

:P

[Misunderestimator]

11. As long as she's ok with the obstinate jerkiness...

than things are cool... grammar corrections are a small price to pay for THAT exchange. :)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

16. i am kept for my good looks

:evilgrin:

[flamingyouth]

Indeed!

:D

[name not needed]

3. give her a good spanking

:)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

4. i may just have to

[Demobrat]

5. Ignore her.

You're a grown man, you don't need nobody to tell you how to talk.

[Misunderestimator]

6. OOhhhh... someone's been hiding something...

or it's another case of assumption. :) :bounce:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

7. i am actually a fairly young woman

[Demobrat]

9. Sorry.

Here in San Francisco most same sex couples use the term partner, not husband or wife. Advice still stands though.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

12. I made my ex memorize all 27 propositions in the English language

while I had sex with her. I told her I wouldn't finish the job until she promised never to end a sentence with any of those words. Good grammar has its rewards.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

13. that was PREPOSITIONS

edit didn't work for some reason

[Misunderestimator]

14. Darn, you beat me to it....

Though I'm now curious to learn the 27 propositions. :)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

22. so am i

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

28. 27) Hey baby! What's your sign?

26) Wanna go eat some clams?
25) Do you like okra?
24) I'd really like to visit Home Depot with you sometime.
23) Do you have a bottle of "Crackfiller" I can borrow?
22) Got tickets to the Indigo Girls - wanna go?
21) Care to teach me gymnastics?
20) I'm off to the hot dog stand - want anything?
19) I teach private cooking classes.
18) I'd really like to film SCREAM THE SEQUEL with you.
17) Wanna go play steam sauna?
16) Allow me to show you my Janet Jackson Superbowl Halftime impression.
15) Got milk?
14) Those legs would look lovely ..around my neck :evilgrin:
13) Is there something on my butt? Will you look?
12) I do a wicked snail imitation
11) Did I mention I like pink snapper?
10) There are two things I really appreciate about Anna Nicole Smith. Guess?
9) Let's go test drive my new TWISTER game.
8) OK, how about my slip 'n' slide?
7) Shall we eat out?
6) My parents were poor role models. I really wish I had someone like you to rear me
5) My favorite part of softball is sliding into home.
4) Come on over to my house. Bring your u-haul.
3) help my zipper is stuck.
2) Where shall I mount my frame?

and PROPOSITION # 1
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1) Come check out the hood of my car! :D

[Misunderestimator]

30. Am I supposed to read all that....?

I mean, any one of them might have worked. :evilgrin:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

31. Careful.....

the next MS Right is going to have to memorize them.

[Misunderestimator]

32. Wait...

let me hook up my printer...

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

33. Hook up your printer?

I've never seen a woman strap on one of those? Freaky! :freak:

[Misunderestimator]

34. LOL

I just know you can handle it... :silly:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

43. You left out my favorite one!

"Wanna go halfsies on an illegitimate child?"
LOL
DUckie

[La Lioness Priyanka]

17. lol

you're evil!

[Westegg]

24. If she could memorize 27 of anything during sex...

...then maybe you ain't doing it right.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

36. Nope we just had to keep starting over...women like it to last a long time

[Richardo]

44. LOL! I thought there was really only ONE proposition,

...when you come right down to it. :)

[The Backlash Cometh]

15. Ask her this question for me:

Should it be phenomena or phenomenon? I'm too lazy to open up the dictionary.

[SW FL Dem]

23. Phenomenon is singular

Phenomena is plural

[left is right]

18. Perhaps,

She allegedly turned into a Grammar Nazi as an extreme reaction to the Orwellian speech of our present maladministration. She has come to realize that words have very real meanings. When those meanings are distorted there are dire consequences. If this is the reason she exhibits such Nazi-ism, then all you can do is hug her tight and whisper in her ear that things will get better when *co is defeated.

[Angelus]

19. Learn to speak ebonics.

:evilgrin:

[arcane1]

20. that ain't right, she ain't got no authority to go be doing that

or something...

at least she's not an actual nazi, on the bright side :P

[La Lioness Priyanka]

21. the nazi party wouldnt want her anyway

i think they do no like black lesbians :P

[name not needed]

25. no but i do

:P

[La Lioness Priyanka]

29. well you cant have her

she is MY grammar nazi

[GirlinContempt]

26. Leave her for me :)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

27. sorry honey

but shes completely taken...

[GirlinContempt]

37. No no

Its you I want

[La Lioness Priyanka]

40. lol. thanks...i misread your message

:D

[GirlinContempt]

52. hehe

}(

[Parrcrow]

35. Speak to her using extremely poor grammar

until she caves!!

[La Lioness Priyanka]

42. its not my speech shes offfended by

but the grammatical mistakes i makes while posting on DU and other websites

[Parrcrow]

55. You post on OTHER websites!?!

:wow: I feel oddly betrayed:cry:

[jukes]

54. or until

she punishes you!


:spank:

[Paragon]

38. put on some jackboots, "punish" each other, and videotape it

:silly:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

41. DINGDINGDINGDING we have a WINNAH!

:evilgrin: :spank: :evilgrin: :spank: :evilgrin: :spank: :evilgrin: :spank: :evilgrin: :spank: :evilgrin:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

45. is that your way of saying you guys want a copy of said tape!

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

47. Well, NOW that you mention it... (nt)

[JM]

51. Keep the tape, post it on the internet...

...and buy the presidency with the proceeds. :evilgrin:

JM

[Taverner]

39. Well I suggest latex and olive oil

But I'm a sick little boy

[Maestro]

46. Good for your wife!!!

It's about time we stop destroying languages. God, if I hear the past particple used as a verb one more time I am going to :puke:. And I hear that all the time around my neck of the woods here in Texas. Or someone trying to be intelligent and incorrectly using who and whom. Or using the pronoun,I,in the nominative case when it should be, me,in the accusative case. Sheesh! Good going on her!!!!! ;)

P.S. Please do not have her review the above message.

[MissMillie]

48. How about "learn with her"

Here's your opportunity to improve something about yourself... and she's going to help you! You are very lucky!

[Az]

49. Sux Syntax

Talk like Yoda you will. Learn her to mess with the affairs of gods you will. Jedi mind tricks will she succumb to.

[Az]

50. Its a big shiny button... press it with enthusiasm, here are some options

Crazy will you drive her with Yoda Speak.

Arrrrr, evast me matey's. A Pirates speach for me.

James... T .... Kirk.... would.... never.... stand for such a thing.

Grammar BAD! Hulk smash grammar.... grrrrrrr

Brainsssssss... must eat grammarian brainsssss.....

Oh that this to to sorted grammar would surely melt away. - Shakespeare

Zenzen dai baka.... baka baka baka........

[Beer Snob-50]

53. Paddle her fanny!!!

That will teach her.

Oops didn't notice that was already a suggestion. Oh well take it as a real good one then.