Hooray!! I got my free book of Mormon today!!!

[LostInAnomie]

I just thought you all would like to know.

I like to read religious texts. I think they are fun to read from a mythological standpoint. Are there any interesting passages I should take a look at?

[rooboy]

1. Shouldn't your post read...

"And so it came to pass, I got my free book of Mormon today!!" ??

I browsed through a copy once and that phrase seemed to be repeated over and over...

[Momgonepostal]

2. Just don't tell Porkrind...lol

[Dookus]

3. hell, they're easy to come by

I take one whenever I stay at a Marriott.

[Sequoia]

4. Morman Bible Tale

About 15 years ago my future hubby and I were hiking in the Pacific Palisades Highlands in good ole Southern Cal right off the PCH and we went into a grove of trees off the path and he turned over a rock for me to sit on and right there in the hole was a Morman Bible. I dusted it off and took it home, read a few things, looked at pictures and put it on the bookshelf. A few weeks later a guy my boyfriend worked with saw it and was talking and suddenly stopped in mid-sentance and had this shocked look on his face. He raised his hand and pointed at the bookcase and said "What are you doing with the book of the devil in your home. You should burn it now!" Well, I kept it for a few more years and eventually gave it away for free.

[NNadir]

21. I tried reading one in a Marriott Hotel (The Marriott's are Mormons).

It was, just like the original bible, incomprehensible.

I'm mystified how anyone can read religious texts and get anything out of them. They're basically bizarre.

[Solly Mack]

5. Moroni 8:8

just to tweak...

[arbusto_baboso]

6. "Chloroform in print" is what Mark Twain called it....

and it is one of the most idiotic, boring reads EVER! It should be called the Book of Morans.

Oh, for an amusing bit, skip to the end. The part where a pre-Columbian Israelite/Native American says goodbye to the reader in French! What a hoot!

[notadmblnd]

7. Yes, but don't stop there

go to the Christian book store and pick up some more propaganda. The "real" Christians don't like the Mormons and they'll have plenty of anti Mormon material for you. Learn about the religions history. Learn how the angels came down from heaven and gave Joseph Smith a golden tablet written in ancient Egyptian for him to translate into the book of Mormon (later to be fully debunked by the deciphering of the Rosetta Stone). Learn about Joseph Smiths life before he became the first prophet of the Mormon church.

Learn that he once practiced a mystical religion called Abraca. Learn about the ancient Masonic rituals performed in their Temples. Learn that they believe that when Mormon men die, they become Gods of their own planet. Learn that their multiple wives only jobs are to populate their inherited planets. Then come back and read their religious book. Pay close attention to their historical dates and then read a documented history of the world and what was happening when and where Joseph Smith claimed the messiah walked the earth. There is a very good anti-Mormon documentary called the "God Makers" put out by a group of excommunicated members. The bookstore will let you rent it.

I don't know if you ordered the book, but if you did you can now expect a visit from two young clean cut men in their early 20's to come and visit you. You'll know who they are, they'll be riding bikes and will be wearing helmets. As long as you are nice to them, they'll keep coming back for "their' bible study and try to get you to attend their stake (church, the temples are for special occasions).

[AntiCoup2K4]

8. Book of Helaman predicts the Bush Criminal Empire

Helaman 7

<4> And seeing the people in a state of such awful wickedness, and those Gadianton robbers filling the judgment-seats -- having usurped the power and authority of the land; laying aside the commandments of God, and not in the least aright before him; doing no justice unto the children of men;

<5> Condemning the righteous because of their righteousness; letting the guilty and the wicked go unpunished because of their money; and moreover to be held in office at the head of government, to rule and do according to their wills, that they might get gain and glory of the world, and, moreover, that they might the more easily commit adultery, and steal, and kill, and do according to their own wills --

[Taverner]

9. Not sure but it makes a fun drinking game

Drink for every "And it came to pass"

You'll be schnockered in no time.

[burrowowl]

10. Let's just say

that it has no literary merit what so ever.

[Taverner]

11. I dunno its an interesting story

A tale based on the whole Thor Herydyl theory....before Thor Herydyl...

I think it's an interesting tale, but then I find the Koran and Bible to have good storytelling qualities too.

[AntiCoup2K4]

12. I'm not so sure about that......

If Joey Smith wrote out the following all on his own, I'd say he made a damn good guess.....

Mormon 8

<27> And it shall come in a day when the blood of saints shall cry unto the Lord, because of secret combinations and the works of darkness.

<28> Yea, it shall come in a day when the power of God shall be denied, and churches become defiled and be lifted up in the pride of their hearts; yea, even in a day when leaders of churches and teachers shall rise in the pride of their hearts, even to the envying of them who belong to their churches.

<29> Yea, it shall come in a day when there shall be heard of fires, and tempests, and vapors of smoke in foreign lands;

<30> And there shall also be heard of wars, rumors of wars, and earthquakes in divers places.

<31> Yea, it shall come in a day when there shall be great pollutions upon the face of the earth; there shall be murders, and robbing, and lying, and deceivings, and whoredoms, and all manner of abominations; when there shall be many who will say, Do this, or do that, and it mattereth not, for the Lord will uphold such at the last day. But woe unto such for they are in the gall of bitterness and in the bonds of iniquity.

<32> Yea, it shall come in a day when there shall be churches built up that shall say: Come unto me, and for your money you shall be forgiven of your sins.

<33> O ye wicked and perverse and stiffnecked people, why have ye built up churches unto yourselves to get gain? Why have ye transfigured the holy word of God, that ye might bring damnation upon your souls? Behold, look ye unto the revelations of God; for behold, the time cometh at that day when all these things must be fulfilled.

Sounds kinda familiar doesn't it?

[notadmblnd]

15. It doesn't sound prophetic.

It sounds like history past. It's nothing any different than the bible, torah or koran.

[AntiCoup2K4]

13. The most famous Mormon in history answers your questions....

....here http://www.donny.com/beliefs.pl

[Khephra]

14. There's some evidence to support claims that John Smith was

a practitioner of ceremonial magic and the Qabbala. It might be interesting to look for passages that support that idea.

[flamingyouth]

18. He was a Spiritualist

And before he had his "revelation" from the "golden tablets" he used "seeing stones" in his hat to see the future. Jon Krakauer's book "Under the Banner of Heaven" elaborates on this somewhat - you'd find that interesting. I was very interested in his magical background - I think a person could write a book on that alone.

[Khephra]

22. There was an article in Gnosis years back that had pictures of

some of Smith's "items". One of them was a dagger that had been fully engraved with Qabbalistic words and sigils. There were several other items, but I can't remember what they were now. It's been several years since I read it.

[flamingyouth]

23. Wow, I'd love to check that out

I bet they have back issues. Thanks for the tip - like I said, this subject has always fascinated me.:thumbsup:

[Taverner]

20. Don't forget "Manuscript Found!"

There was a minister who dabbled in fiction who's final book, before he died, "Manuscript Found!" detailed the journey of a family from Israel to the Americas on papyrus boats. The book mysteriously dissapeared, and shortly after Joseph Smith had his revelations. Also one of the original Mormon witnesses worked at the publishing company that the book was allegedly sent.

[flamingyouth]

16. This is so weird, but I got one too today

Ironically, I already have one (have you ever tried to read this thing?).

My mother's side of the family are all Mormon, and when my husband died my mom's closest cousin got me a really nice, hard-bound edition of the book, inscribed it to me, wrapped it beautifully, and included a very touching and lovely card. Because I love Kathleen very much, I really will cherish this gift from her. I know it came from the heart and that she is trying to help comfort me.

But man, I find that book totally creepy.

[Taverner]

17. Creepy, and repetitive

And it came to pass...and pass...and pass....

[flamingyouth]

19. And it came to pass

How many times exactly does that phrase occur? It's mind-boggling.

The Tabernacle in SLC is actually quite amazing, I will have to say that (I don't know why but I feel the need to put a positive spin on this somehow).:D