Most women, who COULD be objectified by men, choose not to be.

[Misunderestimator]

[jpgray]

1. LOL--I'm not convinced it is so clear cut, though

I'm a guy, but sometimes I enjoy being treated like a sex object and sometimes I don't, and I imagine that's the way women feel as well. Everyone has that experience where you know you look damn good and enjoy the glances rather than find them offensive. But then there are also times where those same glances seem shallow and disgusting.

[Misunderestimator]

3. EXACTLY!!!!!

Thank you for proving the point. BUT being a sex object to a single person you meet one-on-one, is different than being objectified by a group of people who have never even met you... don't you think?

[jpgray]

8. Definitely

It's a different kind of thing one-on-one with someone you know. As a male, I don't really mind strangers looking so much, but there are times when it is tiresome. And of course women don't engage in this in quite the same way men do, so my experience will probably be different.

[Misunderestimator]

13. And I don't mind guys being attracted to me...

even though I'm gay. What I don't like is for people to judge me solely by my looks, without even caring to look past that. That's the difference.

[SarahB]

2. My husband's reaction to my wanting to split:

"Well, you're still a good looking woman. You could get yourself some sugar daddy easily."

After all this time, he still doesn't get me or what kind of person I am to think I'd consider something like that. The waters within me run so much deeper than that. :(

[Misunderestimator]

4. Sheesh... sugar daddy?

That's unfreakinbelievable. damn

[prolesunited]

5. I'll agree with the nice-looking woman part

but he just doesn't get it, does he? :hug:

I can't even begin to describe how furious that would make me if my SO would ever say that to me, but then again, he never would and that's why I'm with him.

[Nevernose]

6. Was he serious?

[SarahB]

16. I think it was a joke out of his pain.

However, he didn't understand why it would bother me. I may be a wife and a mother, but I still consider myself a feminist and I'm proud to wear that title. He's is politically just as left as me, but doesn't have much knowledge on feminist history and couldn't grasp why I felt hurt by the statement. Basically, I felt I was equated with a prosititute which I did not appreciate.

[LiberalVoice]

9. He is an asshole. Most probably jealous because he knew he was...

losing someone he wouldn't have gotten in any of his other lifetimes.

[bandagainstbush]

11. You know...

I don't like violence, but sounds like he could use a good "talking to"

[jpgray]

12. Well, is that true?

Just kidding, of course. :D It helps sometimes to remember that people may appreciate and understand things about you that they will never acknowledge. Since people have been mentioning cultural conditioning on one side of this argument, I'd take note that it cuts both ways--lots of guys are unable to formulate or express thoughts about those 'deeper waters' because socially it is not very acceptable for them to do so.

[SarahB]

15. I agree.

For many men there is a certain level of expression that is hard to convey to others, especially women they have a relationship with. It's hard for men to make themselves vulnerable in any way, but not taking the chance of being vulnerable closes one off making it more difficult to evolve within one's self. Sometimes, to truly express yourself is a risk and it others may not react the way in which you'd want, but at least it's real and honest.
There was something I was told a few months ago, that he was afraid to tell me, that is I had known years earlier, I'd stop feeling so bad about a particular situation. I felt bad about something between us for years, and he was so scared to talk about it, that it was easier to go on letting me blame myself than be open. (Obviously I can't discuss it, because I'd be violating a trust, but hopefully the point comes across.)

[rumguy]

18. give him a break

twenty years from now I doubt you'll look back on that comment in anger...

[LiberalVoice]

7. None of the above.

No offense but from a physical aspect, which is usually the case, "Most" women that are objectified by men are done so because the men find them attractive. Some have good looks naturally, while others pay for it or work for it.

It also has alot to do with the clothing that "Most" women choose to wear. At least in my town(A college town) "Most" women wear rather revealing outfits. Not all the time but alot of it. "Most" women like being objectified if they find the man appealing, aswell.

However, should a man whom she doesn't fancy make some sort of jesture showing his appeal for her she more often then not sees it as disrespectful. Therefore that makes "Most" women hypocrites.

Men do the same thing though.

I could be way off base here, but then again I am just a man.

Edit: Spelling and to add some crizzap.

[Misunderestimator]

10. Objectification is not the same as attraction...

If these women are dressing in ways that they think make them desirable to men (or women), they are not dressing to be objectified, they are dressing to be attractive. Objectification happens when someone looks at them as if they are ONLY objects to be had... not people to be explored. There is nothing wrong with dressing to attract someone... I do it too, and I certainly do NOT want to be ANYONE's object... even a lover's.

[LiberalVoice]

14. Then why do women wear push up bra's or revealing outfits?

Not to say that I think they shouldnt or anything. More power to them for their confidence but, it seems that they themselves are, if not objectifying themselves, then parts of themselves.

I believe that there is a little bit of objectification in all attraction.

Maybe I am missing the point.

Edit: Spelling

[Misunderestimator]

17. It's a more personal issue....

Attraction is a one-on-one thing... Wearing a push-up bra? I do that on occasion... and I don't do it so that I will be objectified. I do it so that I can be attractive to certain people I want to be attractive to.

It's really very simple. The word itself makes it clear. Would anyone REALLY want to be ONLY an OBJECT for someone else? Not a person? Not a mind, soul, spirit?

[LiberalVoice]

19. "Would anyone REALLY want to be ONLY an OBJECT for someone else?"

Ofcourse not.

I guess I just don't get it. I don't know how a woman, making parts of herself more attractive to the opposite sex, is not objectifying herself.

Sorry. I don't see it as such.

I'm in no way saying that a woman shouldn't dress sexy, or in a way that makes her feel attractive about herself. I think that when she does it for someone else she is then objectifying herself.

[rumguy]

20. Objectification will always be an important componenet of sexuality

[Misunderestimator]

21. Why?

Why is objectification important? For me, being attracted to someone physically is a first step to something more... and when I'm in the stage of being physically attracted to someone, before I know them more, I still do not see them as an object. I see them as someone I'm attracted to that I might want to know more. Objectifying someone is turning them into something inanimate... only the appearance matters.

[rumguy]

22. I think we are working with slightly different defintions of objectify

Have you ever been walking down the street and you notice someone checkin' you out? Did you enjoy that?

Do you take note when you are in the presence of people you find attractive and perhaps adjust your body language slightly to highlight your own most attractive features?

Sometimes I think, when it comes to sex, 'making love' is the exception rather than the rule, even between people who do love each other.

[Misunderestimator]

23. I agree... but we're talking about a more personal experience

... I don't consider what you described as objectifying. It IS offensive to me when a man (or woman) finds me attractive and just lears at me. There's a difference between objectifying and appreciating.

And yeah... believe me, I've been around long enough to know that all sex is not 'making love.' It is also not ONLY about the physical even when it isn't about love.

[Donkeyboy75]

24. I see your point there, but the flip side of augmenting your natural

appearance to produce a more attractive image is that you WILL be leered at. That's just biology and human nature (and, I'll admit, a dearth of manners). It just comes with the territory. More attractiveness means more objectification. As much as we'd like, society doesn't always play by the rules we'd like.

[chicaloca]

27. For me....

I try to look good when I go out because if I don't, people (primarily men but sometimes women as well) treat me like shit. Cashiers aren't as nice, I'm not as likely to get help in an electronics store, people won't chat with me while I'm waiting in a line. Plus, I work at a paper, so part of my job is getting people to talk to me, and TRUST ME -- sources, especially male sources, are a hell of a lot more likely to open up to a girl who's cute than one who's just average. In our society, cute/pretty girls deserve our time and effort, and non-pretty girls don't. So it's a matter of reward and punishment -- I don't like putting on makeup and wearing kind-of low shirts, but it makes my life a little easier. I still don't get the respect a man would (you should see the nasty letters my female co-workers and I get compared with the ones our male counterparts get) but I don't get stomped on, either.

[Liberal Classic]

25. Does evaporation figure into this equasion anywhere?

I choose 'no.'

[Kenneth ken]

26. mmmmm Yes ?

did I pick the correct choice?

:P

:hi: