I Wanna Be Will Pitt's Opthamologist! why?

[NashVegas]

I'm tired of those frames.

[SoDesuKa]

1. Do You Mean Optometrist?

An ophthalmologist treats disorders. Surely you don't wish eye troubles on Will, do you?

[NashVegas]

2. Hey Stop That

no fair injecting rationalism

[SoDesuKa]

3. Glaucoma Patients

Glaucoma patients get to smoke marijuana and nobody calls them a pothead. In places where legal marijuana is prescribed to such patients, it's an ophthalmologist who prescribes it. So maybe your subconscious is telling you something here.

[jmowreader]

4. Ophthalmologists will do regular eye exams too

I always go to the ophthalmologist, not because I've got any eye disorder but because my uncorrected vision is so fucking bad. As in I can't stand 20 feet from a billboard and read it bad.

So I go to Carolina Eye in Pinehurst and see Dr. Martin, who is an ophthalmologist. First time I saw him, he looked at the settings on his machine, looked at me, looked at his machine..."what's wrong?" "How in hell can you see at all?" Practice, sir, practice. Now he knows I can't see the wall without a ton of correction, so he's okay. But it's pretty funny when I go in there, they keep hiring new technicians, I get a new one every trip, and they pull the same shit on every one of them: 'read the smallest line on the chart that you can.' "Are you sure?" 'Yes, you must read the smallest line on the chart that you can.' So I dutifully get up, walk across the room, paw the wall a little bit looking for the chart, finally find it, stand about two inches from the chart, read the smallest line, the preceptor's standing there laughing her ass off at the weird look the new associate's giving because she knows the deal...'are you trying to play games with me?' "No, I have a negative-six-diopter prescription, I really can't see the chart from 20 feet away." They invariably turn bright red because they should have read my chart in the first place. I am apparently the newbie prank for CEA Pinehurst and that's okay, I don't mind, it's funny as shit to watch these 19-year-old kids freak out over my non-working eyes.

One big difference between the two in a lot of places, and possibly everywhere, is dispensing--some states will allow optometrists to dispense (everywhere allows them to prescribe) but not ophthalmologists. I don't know if NC is that way, but Carolina Eye employs optometrists, possibly so they can dispense.