For fun - if you wanna dispell/reinforce any Canadian myths ask away

[HEyHEY]

:-)

[TrogL]

1. We are your dour grey neighbours to the North

[HEyHEY]

2. And we love Kraft Dinner

I've heard

[TreasonousBastard]

3. How do they stop...

the igloos in Toronto from melting in the summer?

[HEyHEY]

5. We build ten story igloos

Then when one story melts, we move downstairs

[TreasonousBastard]

13. OK, now that you answered that...

howcum the seals are only on the Candaian side of Lake Erie?

We never see any seals here on this side.

Or Eskimos.

[HEyHEY]

14. You have eskimos in ALaska (I think) or maybe not

No artic coast.

Seals...they're there for the healthcare

[TreasonousBastard]

17. Alaska doesn't count...

it's New York, Michigan, North Dakota... places like that. No one can tell the difference between Alaska and the Yukon. We don't really believe there is a difference.

We know you've got Eskimos all over the place-- who else builds all the igloos?

How do you keep them up there? Slavery?

We could use igloos too, you know.

And, do the Montral eskimos have to speak French? Are there French signs on Quebec igloos?

Enquiring minds want to know.

[HEyHEY]

19. Actually

I believe inuit in Quebec speak french as a main language (not sure though)

Slavery .. nah...but in the 50s we just killed a bunch of by displacing them.

[TreasonousBastard]

20. OK, now I know...

everything about Canada that I need to know.

Me go sleep now.

[TrogL]

6. Why would they melt?

it never gets above freezing

[HEyHEY]

9. he he

Dang it's frostbite year round!

[TreasonousBastard]

12. All that hot air from Buffalo.

[huellewig]

4. I have one...

Are your women colder than tundra?

And -- The best Punk Rock Band is from CanadaLand. That is a fact that can not be disputed.

IF -- you guys had a homegrown Linux distro you would be the best country ever...

[HEyHEY]

7. In BC not cold but you need a good job

In Quebec...spicey as a chile (A GUY FROM FRANCE TOLD ME THAT!)

Do you mean DOA?

[huellewig]

15. I forgot about DOA

I was thinking http://www.g7welcomingcommittee.com/propagandhi/

I saw DOA wayback in my teens. they bitched about the van and the border.

[HEyHEY]

16. "Young Canadians" are awsome too

I saw Joey Shithead do a spoken word once...it was terrific

[TrogL]

8. The women are warm

but have you ever tried doing it in a parka?

[Beearewhyain]

10. So, how much IS a pound of back bacon and a toque?

*Geddy Lee sings*
Take off! To the Great White North!
Take off! It's a beauty way to go.
Take off! To the Great White North!


:evilgrin:

[HEyHEY]

87. About $15.00 combined

[CanuckAmok]

117. To paraphrase Geddy Lee:

"Fifteen bucks is fifteen bucks, eh!"

[HEyHEY]

11. Here's one - what do you think is the hottest Canuck region?

It was almost 110 here today

[yvr girl]

93. It was 39 C yesterday in the Oakanaggan

which is in the interior of BC (our wine country)

[TreasonousBastard]

18. And another one...

how do keep the cheese on the fries melted?

[HEyHEY]

21. I'd tell you - then I'd have to kill you

:-)

[Wilber_Stool]

22. Warm woman

cold beer. That's what keeps them up there.

[DODI]

23. What is the story behind Gastown?

Went there during the day - very nice -- went there at night - it was the first time I saw people literally thrown out of bars.

[HEyHEY]

29. Gastown is right on the edge of the DTES

So in the daytime it's a nice tourist area... but at night, all the trouble from the DTES comes over and the cops don't keep them out. Bouncers there don't put up with much shit at night. A few months ago two people were killed in a club shooting down there. It's a BAD place at night.

[DODI]

66. DTES?

We had stayed at a Days Inn right on the edge of Gastown. We had gone into Gastown the evening thought it was not a good idea and headed back to the hotel. The guy at the desk, a very nice Frenchman, drew a map for us and put huge red x's through Gastown and in a very french accent "very bad, very bad, don't go there at night". We went up to Roberts St. (I think the Hyatt is there) and had a great time. Also, you just blew the no gun violence in Canada myth.

[achtung_circus]

69. DTES

Downtown East Side. Junkies and hookers and other people at the bottom of life. Yes there is some gun crime but by far the weapon of choice is a knife. Many bars in Western Canada Skid Row areas require that you turn in your knife when you enter the bar.

[kcwayne]

24. Is it true that the reason the Canadian's favorite sexual position

is doggie style, so they can both watch the hockey game?

[baldguy]

25. Is it true that water drains away counter-clockwise in Canada?

[fishnfla]

26. Isnt North Dakota one of your provinces?

and isnt Canadian Bacon, just ham?

[achtung_circus]

34. What Americans call Canadian bacon, Canadians call

back bacon or Peameal bacon. It's made from the loin muscles of the pig. Ham is made from the hams, the thighs of the pig.

[pagerbear]

27. What's the story on the annual polar bear hunt

...where they put them on ice floes in the harbor in Toronto every July? That's just cruel!

[HuckleB]

41. Ice floes?

Haven't you heard of global warming?

[Blue-Jay]

28. Do you know Norm from Canada?

Or Gordy?

[sasquatch]

30. Why do you spell neighbor, "neighbour" and

is it true that Canadians own more guns than Americans on average?

[yvr girl]

94. Spell like Brits, pronounce like Yanks (sort of)

we love our "ou" words. Colour, honour, valour etc.

[HEyHEY]

119. It's written on the flag people!

"Talk like yanks - spell like Brits"

Look closer! :-)

[hyphenate]

31. Howcum

my relatives in Cape Breton disavow all knowledge of my relatives in Hamilton, Ontario? Is MacDonald really the equivalent of Smith in Canada? And why are my relatives in Newfoundland so weird?

How much is a good bottle of eiswein going for right now?

[achtung_circus]

35. What can you say

about a region where one of the most popular fast food chains is the
Lick a Chick. (no, you perv, it's poultry)

[BiggJawn]

32. Are you having Summer this weekend?

Or was that 2 weeks ago, and you're expecting Frost tonight.

[HEyHEY]

38. Frost?! I'm at 6,500 feet right now

And it's about 92 degrees~! I don't even wanna THINK what the valley is like.

[LDS Jock]

63. where do you live?

I want to look it up and see. I'm a read map nerd and love that kind of stuff, learning about far away exotic lands. :)

[BiggJawn]

102. Really?? I'm at 700 feet and 41 N and it's 62 right now.

Pretty chilly for a July night.

[HuckleB]

33. What kind of bread would you like? White or Brown?

:)

[HuckleB]

36. Does the sun really shine on the Sunshine Coast?

OK. Yeah, it does. I love it there. Just had to ask, anyway.

[HuckleB]

37. Louis Riel: Man or myth?

[HEyHEY]

39. Man

He was the leader of a group of half french/half first nations called "metis" they waged a war on the Dominion after getting screwed on land deals.

[HuckleB]

40. Dang. So very serious.

But then, this is how Americans get our Canadian history:

Review: Louis Riel -- A Comic Strip Biography by Chester Brown
http://www.bookslut.com/comicbookslut/2004_04_001887.php

Actually, it's good stuff. Check it out.

Salud!

:)

[HEyHEY]

45. He was then hung for being a traitor

And the Metis resumed getting fucked over

[HuckleB]

72. Yup. In the U.S. centric-world, the one where I live, of course...

I've noted him being compared to John Brown, more than once.

Is Riel's story taught in school in Canada?

[HEyHEY]

113. Yup

I wasn't paying attention, but I remember

[Fleshdancer]

42. Perfect topic.....

My mother in law actually believes that in Canada, if you say you're against gay marriage, they will ARREST you. I'm going to make the wild assumption that she's smoking crack, but I might as well run this by you since you ask.

[HEyHEY]

43. Jesus no

Tell her she's in lala land. Gay marraige isn't even legal in evry province yet for christ's sake

[HEyHEY]

44. also

Tell her all the other shit she's heard is wrong too. It's just like the US up here except we can openly critique our government with being blacklisted.

[Fleshdancer]

46. The people on her Christian radio show tells her these things

Unfortunately I'm not joking. She was telling this to my father in law and I whipped around and exclaimed she was crazy for thinking that. I asked her point blank where she read that and what her sources were but all she could say is that it must be true because she heard it TWICE on her radio show. Unfortunately Americans tend to think that saying something ridiculous over and over and over again somehow makes it a fact. Anyway, I told her there was no way it was true that Canadians would arrest their citizens for saying they were against Gay marriage, but obviously she didn't believe me because she repeated this lie to my husband the next day.

I guess the ultimate point of this lie is to make the religious right feel persecuted and victimized on the Gay marriage issue when in fact it's the fundamentalists that are bullying people who do no harm by loving one another. Conservatives are annoyingly efficient at acting as a victim when denying rights to others.

[HEyHEY]

47. What station - I wanna email or phone them

Seriously

[Fleshdancer]

49. great idea

I'll call her tonight and find out.

[TrogL]

77. She would have heard it from any "Christian" right-wing show or pulput

I was heavily involved in the federaly sponsored gay marriage debates. Practically every one of their speakers got up and chanted the party line, over and over, that the government was going to force churches to marry gay people whether they liked it or not (which was a lie) and that the government was going to make Christianity illegal because it preaches against homosexuality (another lie).

[achtung_circus]

78. From your URL I guess you're in north central Alberta

Is Dave Rutherford still spewing his filth on AM Talk Radio. One of my more masochistic activities used to be to listen to him while driving. When my brains spewed out my ears from internal cerebral explosions I would change the station.

[Yavin4]

48. Why Do Canadians Hate America?

or so says every idiot conservative with a radio talk show or TV show.

[HEyHEY]

50. It's not hate

We kind of treat the USA as that dumb jock friend that you always make fun of because he doesn't get the jokes.

Also, how much of this "Hating of America" did you hear about when Clinton was in power - not much...It's more hatred of the government that is currently in power.

[JohnLocke]

61. LOL

"Dumb jock friend that you always make fun of because he doesn't get the jokes."
Then what's Mexico?

[Parrcrow]

65. The friend we wish we had more in common with

so we could tell more jokes that the dumb jock wouldn't get.

[HEyHEY]

88. The guy we see at parties but don't hang out with alone together

[achtung_circus]

57. We hate you for your freedoms.

Now can someone tell me who's going to pay me the bribe I was promised for saying that?

[Swamp Rat]

51. You guys drink moose blood and eat babies?

[HEyHEY]

52. Only on Friday cause the PM says we can't eat baby seals then

[Swamp Rat]

53. Oh OK, but I was talking about human babies.

I figured that Canadians as a collective were cannibal savages, until I found out y'all made beer. Then I figured y'all were just barbarians.

[achtung_circus]

54. Well when I was stuck in the snow drift the other day

and called the Canadian Automobile Association to come and fix the Ski-Doo. The repairman told me it looked like I had blown a seal. No, I said, it's just frost on my moustache.

[HEyHEY]

55. ...

:-)

[achtung_circus]

56. WWWHHHAAATTT???

[HEyHEY]

84. Just thought it was a funny joke

[Swamp Rat]

58. Hee hee! OK, so Canadians are people too!

Humor is a sign of higher brain function. I guess y'all are humans... unlike a lot of creatures I come across here in the USA. Did I mention the alien lizard takeover? They're everywhere here, plus the human "sell-outs." They are not hard to spot. Alien lizards have no sense of humor. That's why they promote shitty "comedians" like Dennis Miller and Colin Quinn. Their human serfs are easy to spot too because they have simplistic, unified rhetoric that is constantly downloaded from TV and radio, and therefore easily identified.

Don't vote for Bush! He's an alien lizard!

[achtung_circus]

59. I won't vote for Bush (or Kerry either, come to that) nt

[Dookus]

60. Is there any sort of program in place

to let us return Shatner to his natural environment?

[LDS Jock]

62. a Canadian catch and release program

returning them to their native land. Interesting. Watch out Bryan Adams, Celine Dion, and that b**** Ann Murray too.

[achtung_circus]

67. Sad to say,

Shatner has been held captive for far too long to be able to readapt to his native environment. He is no longer suitable for release. Ha ha, you're stuck with him.

[Cerridwen]

64. How will Canadian authorities handle the flow

of U.S. citizens to Canada should

a) bush steal another election
b) return of the draft

?

[Yavin4]

68. What's The Deal With The Mullet Hair?

Seriously.

[Swamp Rat]

70. I've never see more mullets than I have in New Mexico.

My cousin finally let his mullet grow to touch his ass... I don't know what to call it now.

[achtung_circus]

71. You're asking us??

When I first heard of them I had to do a google search to find out what the heck they are. I can't remember seeing one.

[HuckleB]

73. Who is the Canadian "Lance Armstrong"?

Yeah, that's right, it's a U.S. centric question. I guess I'm a U.S. centric kind of bastard.

[achtung_circus]

75. Who is Lance Armstrong?

and what hockey team does he play for?

[HuckleB]

76. You still have hockey teams in Canada?

Dang. You learn something new every day.

:)

[RoadRunner]

74. Hey big J, where's your bear thingie?

I miss it.

:shrug:

[HEyHEY]

85. I have one on deck Wannajumpmyscooter sent me

[Skittles]

79. explain that song AMERICAN WOMAN

:D

[achtung_circus]

80. It's really quite simple

COALITION OF THE WILLING
American woman, stay away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don't come hanging around my door
I don't want to see your face no more
I got more important things to do
Than spend my time growin' old with you
Now woman, stay away
American woman, listen what I say


REALITY TV
American woman, get away from me
American woman, mama let me be
Don't come knocking around my door
I don't want to see your shadow no more
Colored lights can hypnotize
Sparkle someone else's eyes
Now woman, get away
American woman, listen what I say

[nickgutierrez]

81. Two questions:

1. Why are you always drunk? :P

2. What do the people of Quebec call french fries?

[HEyHEY]

83. Because I've got Irish blood and I'm a writer-gotta keep up the stereotype

Seroiously though, nothing better to do, I'm actually not as bad as I used to be, I'm slowly phasing it out as I ggrow older.

Quebecers call french fries "Frites"

[achtung_circus]

90. Or more formally,

Pommes Frite.

[HEyHEY]

92. Really? IN all the time I lived in Acadia and Quebec I never heard that

But of course it is formal, something the drunks I hung out with never ventured to. ;-)

[achtung_circus]

95. Literally

Pomme (short form of Pomme de terre, apples of the earth) fried.

But who asks for french fried potatoes- I ask for fries or Frites or if I'm feeling decadent, poutine.

[yvr girl]

91. they add gravy and cheese curds...

and call it poutine.

[LiviaOlivia]

82. If Canadians are so great how come the hot-house tomatoes

that come down from BC and other points north have no taste to them? Another hot-house specialty doesn't seem to have efficacy deficits.

[HEyHEY]

86. What the fuck do we know about tomatoes?

Wanna buy some pot? ;-)

[Interrobang]

89. Hell, yeah!

I'll trade you some BC bud for some Ontario Hydro... ;)

Then again, HEyHEY, a friend of mine once bought a basket of tomatoes while in Pennsylvania, and the end of the basket said:

Ohio Valley Tomatoes -- Grown Nature's Way On Plastic Mulch With Trickle-Down Irrigation

Seriously, I'm glad we have cereal-box French, because it spares us from asinine box copy like in the US...

That said, the Great Canadian Truism is, no matter which is your first language, you'll always pick up the side of the box with the *other* language on it.

[yvr girl]

96. Oh, yeah - what about California strawberries

Big. Yes. Tasteless. YES, YES!

[achtung_circus]

97. My father used to say that I was conceived in a canoe.

Given that I was born in November I don't think I believe him, but it's a nice image, and a difficult gymnastic exercise. An air matress in the bottom of the canoe prevents cedar burn.

[HEyHEY]

98. Your folks going at it in a canoe is "a nice image"

Wow, man that's beautiful. ;-)

[HuckleB]

99. Tell me again why "Jungle Love" isn't the Canadian national anthem?

[HuckleB]

100. Explain Bryan Adams and Celine Dion for me, again?

I mean, why do you hate the U.S so much?

:)

[HEyHEY]

101. Four letters CRTC

They make stations play Canadina tunes, so over the years alot of crap has gotten through.

Actually Dion is tallented

[tigereye]

103. what about all these young female rockers from up there

There seem to be more female rockers that make it here (US) from up there (CAN), than from down here. Boy, there's a tortured construction. Or does Canada just breed more iconoclasts?

[HEyHEY]

109. Can't give a god answer to that

sorry

[LibertyorDeath]

104. When are you going to stop putting your

Elderly out on the Ice flows to Die.

& what's up with the Saskatchewan Seal Hunt starting back up. :)

[HEyHEY]

107. When they start pulling their weight!

I see it as a romantic finish, I can't wait to get on my ice berg.

[LibertyorDeath]

110. When they start pulling their weight!

LOL :) I thought Canucks were supposed to be NICE!

Cheers

[Guy Fawkes]

105. Why is it that canadians know more about Americans then vice verca?

I've talked to people who couldn't tell you where canada is on a US-Canada map!

[HEyHEY]

106. We get NBC, CBS ABC...and all the other son regular cable

Plus all the movies

[Guy Fawkes]

108. Here, we get all the religious I-hate-XXXXXXX channels

and ABC shows the 700 club all the freaking time.

[achtung_circus]

121. Well if look at a map

you'll see that Canada is bigger, and Canada in top
If we were in prison the US would be our bitch.

[NightTrain]

111. Speaking of Canada, I just spent the day and evening with a bunch of folks

from Montreal. For the third year running, they came down to Connecticut for the 6th Annual Road Agents Hot Rod & Rockabilly Rumble (http://www.theroadagents.com). As always, they proved a highly enjoyable group to hang out with!

Salut, Montreal! :hi:

[HEyHEY]

112. Montrealers are great

Not as great as Acadians...but they're up there

[SmileyBoy]

114. Is it all right with you if an American (like me) has this avatar???

Because I actually get CBC on my TV in Fargo.

[HEyHEY]

115. I've been meaing to ask youi out that

We'll make an exception this time ;-)

[TheMightyFavog]

116. Is Red Green right about the RCAF?

That its only fighter jet is a loon with a turbojet duct taped to its back, and its only member goes home after 5:00 Central Time?

[CanuckAmok]

118. Ther is no longer an RCAF.

The Royal Canadain Air Force, Royal Canadian Navy, and Canadian Army were unified into the Canadian Armed Forces some years ago.

His name is Robert, and he's very nice.

[HEyHEY]

120. Approachable guy wouldn't ya say

But man, when he gets a few Molsons into him, he starts talking about invadin this country and pilaging that one.

[achtung_circus]

122. Ist true that name for thecounrty Canada

com from Mexicanian
and Ka Nada
means "no shit"

[baldguy]

123. If Bush steals the election again

Will you please invade us?

[NMDemDist2]

124. what about the thing that Canadian health services stink?

what's the truth on your medical care up there?