A funny "priest and rabbi" joke I just got from my Dad!

[bif]

A priest and a rabbi are sitting next to each other on an airplane. After
a while the priest turns to the rabbi and asks, "Is it still a requirement
of your faith that you not eat pork?"

The rabbi responds, "Yes, that is still one of our beliefs."

The priest then asks, "Have you ever eaten pork?"

To which the rabbi replies, "Yes, on one occasion I did succumb to temptation and tasted a ham sandwich."

The priest nodded in understanding and went on with his reading.

A while later, the rabbi spoke up and asked the priest, "Father, is it
still a requirement of your church that you remain celibate?"

The priest replied, "Yes, that is still very much a part of our faith."

The rabbi then asked him, "Father, have you ever fallen to the temptations of the flesh?"

The priest replied, "Yes, rabbi, on one occasion I was weak and broke with my faith."

The rabbi nodded understandingly. He was silent for about five minutes.

And then he said, "Beats the hell out of a ham sandwich, doesn't it?"

[lovedems]

1. I got this one in an email...

Got Taken.............

A fellow was getting ready to tee off on the first hole when a second
golfer approached and asked if he could join him. The first said that
he usually played alone, but agreed to the twosome. They were even
after the first few holes. The second guy said, "We're about evenly
matched, how about playing for five bucks a hole?" The first fellow said
that he wasn't much for betting, but agreed to the terms. The second guy
won the remaining sixteen holes with ease. As they were walking off
number eighteen, and while counting his $80.00, he confessed that he was
the pro at a neighboring course and liked to pick on suckers. The first
fellow revealed that he is the parish priest. The pro got all flustered
and apologetic, offering to! return the money. The priest said, "You won
fair and square and I was foolish to bet with you. You keep your
winnings." The pro said, "Is there anything I can do to make it up to
you?" The priest said, "Well, you could come to mass on Sunday and make
a donation. And then, if you bring your mother and father by after
mass, I'll marry them."

[whistle]

2. Good one, thanks....

[sus]

3. my father told that one from the pulpit when i was like 13 years old.

i thought my mother was going to crawl under her pew.

[rkc3]

4. Golf Joke

A young man was playing golf in Ireland one morning when he sliced his shot deep into the woods. Upon entry he heard a stomach turning sound and went in to investigate.

Almost immediately he found his ball laying next to an unconscious Leprechaun.

The Leprechaun awoke and announced he had been caught fair and square and would grant the young man three wishes. The young man declined saying he felt guilty for almost killing the Leprechaun.

As the young man walked back to the fairway, the Leprecahun decided to grant him his three wishes. He thought for a moment and decided on the wishes - a great golf game, all the money he could ask for, and a great sex life.

A few months later the young man was playing golf and the Leprecahun stopped to ask him how his golf was - "I shoot just under par every time, the change in my game was miraculous."

He asked about his finances, to which the young man replied, "Every time I put my hand in my pocket it's full of bills. Just wonderful."

"And your sex life?" asked the Leprechaun.

"Well, just a few times a month." replied the young man.

Incensed the Leprechaun asked "What the hell's wrong with you lad? I've given you three wishes and this is how you use the third.?

To which the young man replied "It's not bad for a priest in a small parish."

[Radical Activist]

5. What do you get when you cross

a Mormon missionary and a Unitarian Universalist?

Someone who knocks on your door and then doesn't know what to say.

[WoodrowFan]

6. what do you get when you cross an agnostic with a Jehova's Witness

someone who knocks on your door for no particular reason. (rimshot)

[bif]

7. Did you hear about the Unitarian...

...who burned a question mark on his neighbor's lawn?

[bif]

8. Another one...

Two neighborhood kids were playing in the street. After a fight over a ball the Catholic kid says in anger to the Jewish kid "My priest knows way more than your rabbi." In reply the Jewish kid says, "That's because you tell him everything."

[Jeff in Cincinnati]

9. Another good one...

Jews don't recognize Jesus as their savior.
Protestants don't recognize the authority of the Pope.
And Baptists don't recognize each other at the liquor store...