Cat Haiku...

[Solon]

You never feed me.
Perhaps I'll sleep on your face.
That will sure show you.

You must scratch me there!
Yes, above my tail!
Behold, elevator butt.

The rule for today
Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
New rule tomorrow.

In deep sleep hear sound
cat vomit hairball somewhere
will find in morning.

Grace personified.
I leap into the window.
I meant to do that.

Blur of motion, then-
silence, me, a paper bag.
What is so funny?

The mighty hunter
Returns with gifts of plump birds-
your foot just squashed one.

You're always typing.
Well, let's see you ignore my
sitting on your hands.

My small cardboard box.
You cannot see me if I
can just hide my head.

Terrible battle.
I fought for hours. Come and see!
What's a 'term paper'?

Small brave carnivores
Kill pine cones and mosquitoes
Fear vacuum cleaner

I want to be close
to you. Can I fit my head
inside your armpit?

Wanna go outside.
Oh, shit! Help! I got outside!
Let me back inside!

Oh no! Big One
has been trapped by newspaper!
Cat to the rescue!

Humans are so strange.
Mine lies still in bed, then screams
My claws are not that sharp.

Cats meow out of angst
"Thumbs! If only we had thumbs!
We could break so much!"

The Big Ones snore now
Every room is dark and cold
Time for "Cup Hockey"

We're almost equals
I purr to show I love you
Want to smell my butt?

[demnan]

1. That's a beautiful poem!!!

[SoDesuKa]

2. You Know Your Cats!

I love this one:

The rule for today
Touch my tail, I shred your hand.
New rule tomorrow.

Now, that is a cat.

[undergroundpanther]

3. love it

A cat friend visits.
I swat him anyway,
just For principle's sake.

You are my best friend,
Person Allergic to Cats.
Let me shed on you.

I think that the new
Kitten makes a fine punching Bag and trampoline.

You may call it "a Lot of yowling."
I call it Singing to my friends.

I grope under the Door with a splayed paw;
I know You're in there.
Come out!

We meet outside;
I Startle.
You're out of context;
Go back inside, please!

Visitors come.
They Coo over me.
Ignoring Them, I wash my rump.

Your friends seem nice:
calm, Attentive and kind.
So when Are they going home?

There will be canine
Parts missing if that dog gets
Anywhere near me.

I hide under the Bed.
I don't want to be friends.
Take that child away!

You want to cuddle;
I don't. No offense meant,
but Right now you bore me.


I eat mice and birds
Washed down with bugs and beetles
My farts clear the room

[Jo March]

4. Those are great!

I sent them to my cat-friendly friends!

Thanks for sharing.

[Westegg]

5. These are all so wonderful!!! I'm totally inspired...

...and will try to write some myself.


Sure, I vomited.
If you value vintage rugs,
Serve better cat food.

Hello? Clean the box.
How would you like it if your
Toilet rarely flushed?

That plastic mouse? Wack.
Homes, I'm a cat, and I know
When I'm being played.

[soupkitchen]

6. Yours are very good, and one of mine

I come to you when
the refrigerator opens
what else do you want

[GOPisEvil]

7. Watch out, plastic bag

You stand no chance against me!
Face my fearsome pounce!

[Unperson 309]

8. More Cat Haiku

Cat indifferent!
When nobody is looking
Then I cuddle you.

Yarn as rattlesnake!
Pounce! Then fly about the room!
Cat victory dance!

I purr in my sleep,
Dreaming of your loving touch.
Awake? Can't care less.

Ancient Egypt knew
We cats are divinities!
Thought you'd like to know.

How DARE you bring that
Horrible new creature in?!!
... Mirror?!.. Never mind.

You're just jealous! Ha!
Watch me twist and turn about.
YOU can't lick YOURS!

If *I* ruled the world...
Oh, wait just a moment... yes!
point of fact... I do!

I'm old. Must leave you...
Thankfully, in loving arms,
Peaceful end of pain.

Thought me gone away?
Old cat eyes in kitten face,
Here I am, again!


309

[ajacobson]

9. Thanks for the laugh

I sure needed it.