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...let me explainerate. The only one o' those movies I've seen was that thar "Godfather"--and that was because Laura wanted to see it a few weeks ago in honor of ol’ Marlon Brando (R.I.P.). Well, “why not?” I thought. Laura had heard a whole lot o’ tall tales about how this "Godfather" was supposed to be “the greatest movie in the historectomy of the American cinema” and all, so I agreed to take a looksee in the White House screenering room...
Well, pardner, save your money, ‘cause this "Godfather" had nothing to it--no one with superpowers for fightin' evildoers, no spaceships with shooting rays and sireens, no talkin’ animals...NUTHIN. Well, there was one horsey, but they killed him off before he could even say “boo”. Yours truly stopped watching once everyone stopped talking American when the youngest feller went to Italy and they all started talking Italy-ian, instead.
Anyway, if I was y'all, I'd get one o’ my favorites that y'all haven't mentioned: “RAMBO—First Blood Part II.” Now THIS is a movie! I don’t mind tellin’ y’all that this is the movie I watch sometimes when conflictered over an important military decision. It inspyrates me like no other--that Rambo don’t play! He goes back and beats up Vietnasia all by himself. That’s just what I would have done if I had had the luxury of goin’ to Vietnasia instead of having to volunteer for the frontline of the waiting list for the Irrational Guard. But, I HAD to train to be a pilot of an obsolete model fighter that had no chance of being used in combat, anymore--otherwise I woulda been there in Vietnasia side-by-side with ol’ Rambo, himself. Still, as much as I might have wanted that, my conscience didn’t allow it--my duty to guard Texas airspace from hostile...you know...buzzards and sea gulls and stuff...was clear to me then, and it's clear to all those who are supporterizing me now.
So, your President gives “RAMBO—First Blood Part II” four stars. I woulda given it five, but the one thing wrong with this movie was that it didn’t have a talking horsey in it, either. Coulda used one, too...maybe an English one, you know, from England, so that Rambo could have had an international coalition--and the horsey could have said cool stuff like, “Tally ho, it’s a trap!” or “Look out behind you, Rambo, old chap!” and maybe even sang a horsey song round the campfire the night o’ the big mission, or somethin’.
Anyway, hope that was helpful, pardner!
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