I just got in a big fight while driving, and I don't know what to do.

[SmileyBoy]

I was driving my little brother home (who's 15 years old and really a HUGE whiny crybaby pussy, but agressive, oppositional and annoying towards me) from his tennis practice today. I was driving down I-394 going 55 miles per hour, and a song I liked was playing on the radio station, and I was singing along to it. He then told me to stop singing, and then I told him that it was MY car, and I'll sing as much as I want. Because even though my parents put the down payment on the car, I pay for the remaining payments, the car's insurance and title is registered in MY name, and I pay for the car's gas and insurance and maintenance. And then he said "Dude, it's not YOUR car!! Mom and Dad payed for it!!":eyes:

So then, he keeps on persisting on me to stop singing when the song's just about over, then he sticks his tennis racket in front of my face saying "Look, I'm imparing your vision!!" I yell at him to stop doing that, or else we'll get in an accident. And then I bump him with my elbow a couple times when we slowed down. I started yelling (lecturing) at him because of him almost getting me in an accident, and because of his disrespectful, shitty behaviour in MY car, telling ME what to do. I told him he wouldn't be allowed in my car anymore. He was then making disrespectful blah-blah gestures with his hands and mouth. That got me REALLY pissed. Remember, I don't give a shit if he does this stuff in our house, but this is MY CAR, and I will NOT have him treating me like this in MY property.

He started getting EVEN MORE oppositional and disrepective, telling me crap about how it wasn't really my car (of course it is!!), and rationalizing his behaviour when we were on 394. ("Well, you wouldn't stop singing, so I had to do that!!!)

So when we got to the red light at the intersection, I smacked him in his face a couple times for doing that shit to me. He had a stone-cold look on his face the rest of the way home.

We then got home, and I calmly explained to my father what happened (him imparing my vision on the road, being disrespectful). The little pussy then immediately rushes into the house crying like a little baby, "HE HIT ME IN THE CAR, THE LITTLE BASTARD!!!!! *SOB* *SOB* *SOB*"

Then my father starts getting all angry with me like I was 13 again and did something wrong. "HOW DARE YOU HIT YOUR BROTHER!!!" But because I'm a full-grown adult and bigger than him, I calmly ask right back and said "Dad, can I PLEASE tell you what happened???"

He says no, he doesn't want any part of this. He backs off on yelling at me, telling each of us to get out of his sight.

That little oppositional bastard is NOT allowed in my car anymore for the rest of that car's life. I'm SOOOO angry at that little disrespectful shit.

BTW, this is a kid who also insults me whenever I strike up a friendly conversation with his best friend, saying that I'm "sucking up to him".:eyes:

[JVS]

1. Don't like my singing, GET YOUR OWN FUCKING CAR

[vi5]

2. What just happened....

..you know how in cartoons when someone sees something that they can't believe, they do that rapid fire, head shaking back and forth "ayeeayeeayeeayee!" thing?

That's how i felt reading this post.

[TrogL]

3. Don't hit your brother

Make him sit in the back seat with the seat belt on if he can't control himself. Keep all tennis rackets and other potential weapons in the trunk - excuse, they could fly around during an accident.

[The Backlash Cometh]

19. Children belong in the backseat and buckled.

Explain to your father that you will be happy to drive your brother in the future and you are sorry that you hit him, but that you didn't know how else to control the situation while the car was in transit. Because you're afraid that your brother would distract you again, tell your father you would feel safer if your brother sat in the backseat.

Also, you sound like you are sensitive about your brother's claim that the car belongs to your parents. As an adult, you don't need affirmation from your younger brother. If you're now paying the bills, the car is yours. Own it.

[MercutioATC]

26. I was thinking the trunk, but O.K.....the back seat... n/t

[JVS]

4. You need to strand your brother somewhere

[TX-RAT]

5. Whats the age difference between you 2?

[SmileyBoy]

12. I'm 22, he's 15.

6 1/2 year difference is the worst.

[JVS]

16. I thought you were 18.

Guess I just assumed the difference is less. Your 22, you shouldn't be carting around 15 year olds. Tell the little shithead to take the bus.

[TX-RAT]

22. 22 yr old man smacks a 15 yr old kid?

Think that was necessary?

[Jack_DeLeon]

51. Yes.

Sounds like it was too me.

[TX-RAT]

54. So you approve of adults slapping around juveniles?

[HEyHEY]

60. Not only do I approve, I'll partake

As long as it's not abusive anyway

[TX-RAT]

62. I believe hitting the child in the face would be considered abusive.

[Darth_Kitten]

71. Killing somebody on the road because this kid wouldn't behave......

and kept bothering his brother trying to drive would be abusive.

Sorry, I just cannot be too critical of smacking this spoiled kid, he could have gotten someone killed, for crying out loud.

[Jack_DeLeon]

63. Yes.

I dont condone "beatings" that cause lasting physical damage, however I dont think this rose to that occasion.

Yes there are people who will call up the police and file an assault charge just for making any physical contact. :eyes:

Myself I dont necessarily think involving the criminal justice system in trivial matters such as in the thread posters example is the answer.

[HEyHEY]

58. YES

Hey man it's up to people our age to keep people that age in line - it's part of growing up.

[KinkyDem]

6. A couple of very simple points

You were wrong to strike your brother.

He was wrong to treat you the way he did.

He was even more wrong to imparte your vision while driving.

By striking your brother you have forfieted the moral high ground and no longer have a leg to stand on.

In my opinion, you would have better off to simply eject him from the car. It's easy really, all you have to do is pull into a gas station with a pay phone and call the cops. If the registration is in your name, they will remove him from the car and maybe even arrest him.

You would have better off keeping your cool and getting home to tell your story.

[SmileyBoy]

9. We already apologized to each other.

I apologized to him for hitting him (his head's OK), and he said he was sorry for acting like a jerk (well actually, he only apologized for imparing my vision with his racket, not his cruddy behaviour).

I still don't forgive him for doing that shit to me, and I hope I can someday.

[Mr.Green93]

23. you handled it well.

Sounds like typical brother stuff. But listening to someone one sing along off key to the radio can be tedious.

[yellowcanine]

29. I would "ground him" for about a month - meaning he finds his own damn

ride for a while. And then when you do let him back in he rides in the back seat and says nothing unless asked for another month or so.

[Donkeyboy75]

35. So, instead of dealing with it, you involve the police

and waste taxpayer money? Don't think so.

I'm friends with plenty of cops, and I can only imagine how they would respond.

On edit: not justifying the hitting. But there are other ways, such as forcible ejection.

[mongo]

7. I have a prejudice against teenage boys

since they have shot out my store windows, and generally harrased me in the past BUT,

YOU SHOULD HAVE BEATEN THE CRAP OUT OF THE LITTLE BASTARD!

It sounds like there is no one setting down any rules for civil behavior for the boy. If he does that to you, who else does he treat this way? His teachers? Schoolmates? The kid needs to learn to be civil and that his actions have consequences. Since your parents do not have the inclination to do that, I would say that the next time he pulls something you slam his head into the nearest doorframe a couple of times.

[JVS]

11. YEAH, BUST THE TENNIS RACKET OVER HIS HEAD

[HEyHEY]

61. Hey - Northwest's brother is a tennis brat!

[SmileyBoy]

14. He treats my friends like that, and he's gotten in trouble...

...with being a bitch towards teachers.

I was a pretty oppositional guy when I was his age, but I wasn't that bad.

[Shakespeare]

8. 15-year-olds should be exiled on a desert island until they're 25.

And IF they survive, then they can rejoin society. Yeah, yeah--flame me for generalizing, but they're not the most pleasant age group to be around. Hopefully, he'll grow out of it (or just grow UP a bit), and you two can have a better relationship someday.

[TeacherCreature]

10. Brothers always fight!

You probably shouldn't have hit him. But your Dad should have been mad at him too. What he did was very dangerous. But you father was so upset by your hitting your brother he couldn't hear you.

Let me tell you, as a mother of two sons who got into physical fights every so often: I was affraid one of them was really going to seriously hurt the other and that would have been impossible to deal with from any angle. How would I forgive the one who had hurt the other and how would he have forgiven himself? All around sucky situation.

So stop the physical violence and deal with your snotty brother as the adult you claim to be.

[ChompySnack]

13. Hitting isn't cool

It just makes you look like an a**hole in the end. The best thing to do would be to just take his complaining and all the other crap and make your decision to not allow another ride in your car. If you do that next time, then he was a jerk, you were mature and you will get what you want in the end anyway.

[SmileyBoy]

15. I know. Read Post #9.

...

[Rowdyboy]

17. Suggest to your mom that she consider having an abortion

in the 48th tri-mester. Sounds like she's he doing him a favor to put him out of his misery.

Or, check back with him when he's 25. Maybe he'll grow up (it has happened!)

[retread]

18. My younger brother and I fought like that when we were growing up.

We went our separate ways as adults, though we lived less than 50 miles apart. He died year before last.
I urge you to do what you need to do so you don´t look back years from now and realize what petty shit you allowed to come between you and your brother. You are the adult and the older one, swallow your pride, make a concerted effort and maybe years from now you won´t have the regrets I do.

[Xithras]

20. My little brother did something similar once and I just threw him out

I did the little SOB a favor by picking him up after a party, and he had the nerve to try and make me wait while he finished making out with his girlfriend. When I dragged him out of there he began berating me in the car, cussing, screaming, and he eventually socked me and called my girlfriend (now my wife) a slut.

Based on the whining I overheard the next day, he didn't much appreciate the 11 mile walk home in 40 degree winter weather. We were literally in the middle of nowhere when I stopped the car, forcibly threw him out, took his cell phone away, and then drove off.

He never did that again :)

[AngryAmish]

21. If you don't pop him someone else will

Hitting one's teenage brother does not count as violence. Don't worry about it. If your father is mad at you he is wrong.

[bloodyjack]

39. some Amish you are!

nonviolence!

[AngryAmish]

43. Easy, English

A few fistfights in youth enable family members to get along when older.

[Spangle]

24. One of the problems with the age gap

Is that you don't truely work out all the problems. Closer in age, you would have all ready had a "round or two." Right or wrong, it would have happened. So don't feel to bad over it.

I come from an age gap family. 3 kids, all 8 years apart. Not planed that way, just worked out that way. I'm the baby. My eldest brothers, first child is just 4 years younger then me. She is more like my sister then my older brothers feel like brothers.

In situations like that, parents are not use to kids "going at it." Eldest is always the eldest, youngest is always the youngest. Being raised like that, it's a shock to be a parent of 2 boys, 2 years apart. Each thinks the other is his personal punchking bag. Drives me CRAZY!

One thing for sure, they have a better understanding of what their words and actions can "create" in another person. If your littler brother doesn't have a sibling close to his age, it might be the problem. He is use to doing as he please without no REAL dealing with what he creates.

It's time to have a real "man to man" talk with brother. He is 15 and if he does something legaly wrong, it will effect him for the rest of his life. Better to learn lessons "in family," if you know what I mean. Another words, at 15 he is a young adult and not a baby. If he can't "take it" he better not be dishing it out. Only "babys" run to "mommy and daddy." He can't be a young adult and a baby. He has to make the choice.

Your 22 and he is 15, leave Dad out of this mess. Except to remind him that bro isn't a baby anymore.

Also, tell him that you expect him to respect you like YOU respect him. There is a time and a place for "horse play" and he is old enough to know what that is. If he had pulled that stunt with one of his friends, they might not have been mature enough to handle the situation and DRIVE safely at the same time. As a big brother, Yea, you gota say something about that.

[Speck Tater]

25. Just my humble opinion, but

if I was 22 and having that kind of problem with my kid brother I wouldn't living with mom and dad, I'd be out on my own. (Disclaimer, This is hypothetical because when I was 22 I had already been married and out on my own for a year.)

[SmileyBoy]

27. I'm partially on my own.

I'm in college (a long ways away) 9 months out of the year. Hopefully I can get a year-round place next year.

[Cybergata]

28. Hey don't insult

...all the beautiful pussies out there by comparing them to your little brother.

Your little brother is probably jealous of you when you talk to his friends, plus even his most annoying behavior is only done to get your attention. Remember what you did to get the attention of that cute little girl sitting in front of you in the 7th grade? You pissed the hell out of her, right? Same thing!

:hippie:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

30. I'm glad you realize it was wrong

to hit him. I have a feeling you'll find this lesson handy when you have kids of your own who go through those obnoxious phases.

Here's a suggestion for you. Don't let him ride with you again unless he signs a contract stating that he understands you can strand him if he doesn't follow your behavior rules. Make sure the rules are listed individually and stated clearly to avoid misinterpretation.

I hope your dilemma resolves itself.

[kodi]

31. next time you catch the kid jerking off, get pix & blackmail the prick

.

[name not needed]

32. Find his porn,

take it out, and casually leave it somewhere. Walk in while he isn't home, and tell your father you found something interesting on the floor next to his bed.

[MrSlayer]

33. Of course he's a pussy, he plays tennis.

Get the kid on some skates and give him a stick. Then again depending on what the song was he might have been justified.

[SmileyBoy]

34. It was "Sex And Candy" by Marcy Playground.

Kick-ass song. I don't care what anyone else says. :P

[bloodyjack]

42. hey! i play tennis!

on the other hand, I'm a pathological drinker! I can pathologic you under the table anytime! no pussy am I!

what do you say to that!

[amazona]

36. 2 things you need to do -- this kid is dangerous

You could have been killed. Putting a tennis racket in front of the driver's face is sociopathic behavior. We are not talking about a 5 year old. 15 is too old for this kind of thing. He was putting both your lives at risk.

Number 1 -- you MUST stand your ground and not allow him to ride with you in the car again. It is not worth giving up your life so your Dad can maintain his illusions about the sanity of his son.

Number 2 -- if at all possible, at a calm moment, either talk to your Dad or give him a letter telling what happened. He should be informed. It may not be possible for him to accept the truth, so don't expect too much. When I was a teen, my brother attempted to stab me with a knife, and I don't think my parents ever accepted the truth, even though my Mom must have seen part of what happened. All you can do is try to inform them and then steer clear of the psycho-brother as much as you can.

Be careful. A 15 year old who thinks this is normal behavior has serious problems, but it isn't your job to solve them. Just take care of your own safety.

[RandomKoolzip]

37. "Disrespective" is not a word.

You should never hit anyone, especially people smaller than you.

You're 22. Move out of your parents' house.

[SmileyBoy]

41. I don't live here most of the year.

I'm in college (dorm) most of the year.

I'm starting to look into getting a house on College Street south of campus to share with 3-4 other roomates starting next year.

[Swamp Rat]

69. There's nothing wrong with living with your parents at 22.

Only Americans have this complex. Every other continent where I've lived and been to do the opposite. Latin American and European families are quite happy all living together and there is no set age for leaving. I left when I was 17 but returned when I was 21 to go to a nearby university. While living in Brasil I learned REAL family values - living together in harmony in large families. It's so sad that Americans do not know this or somehow have forgotten. Maybe that's why so many elderly folks end up in homes here in the USA, with no loving family to attend them.

[oldcoot]

38. According to your brother, most people do not own their cars

or houses. If you really want to make him cry, talk to him about mortgages and car loans. After you spend a half-an-hour discussing interest rates, he will wish that you had hit him instead.

[SmileyBoy]

40. LOL!!!

:D

[mitchum]

44. Make the little bastard ride on the bumper from now on

You did nothing wrong, northwest. The punk deserved it.

[fortyfeetunder]

46. No the effing roof rack

I would have tied his tail to the roof rack. Too bad it's summertime. He would really feel the pain in a Canadian winter.

[NickB79]

45. I wouldn't have hit him

But that tennis racket would be lying in a ditch somewhere right now rotting in a pool of swampwater. If he wanted it back, have him walk his sorry ass down the road to get it.

[fortyfeetunder]

47. The delayed reaction...an attention getter

My younger brother pulled that same maneuver once. I was 11 he was 10. Well we weren't driving, we were walking, and he had this way of going up to the boys in my classroom and say "Sister loves you"

Well, I had had enough of it, because the last time, we were in classrooms separated by a door between the classrooms, and he made a "surprise appearance" in the my classroom and made same announcement.

So I socked him one, enough to knock him to the sidewalk. We walked home in silence, only to have him walk in the front door and he had a nuclear meltdown in front of the parents...But they didn't flinch because they already knew of his antics.

So I think you need to warn your parents on your brother's behaviour because he can't be allowed to get away with it. Never. Otherwise, he is going to pull that stunt on someone and get hurt. Badly.

[CandyCrim21]

48. I understand where your coming from

But I don't think that smacking him around was the answer to your problems. LOL, Obviously! He WAS acting like a little shit and he should not have been jacking around while your driving your car but I'm not so sure about the whole respect factor. Like yeah he should respect your car and stuff but siblings don't respect each other like they do parents and that sounds like the kind of respect you were demanding from him. To boot, (not saying this justifies his behavior), but what kind of day did he have? Was it shitty, did he lose his last friend? What was it like? Because I just find it very hard to believe that he would be trying to piss you off to amuse himself. Siblings do fight like your describing but I probably would have asked him what his problem was in the first place. Obviously something was wrong for him to have been in that disposition in the first place. And that stone cold look on his face was probably a little bit of hurt and anger mixed together along with quite a bit of shock. Any trust he did have for you in the beginning may be gone now. I think you two should talk it out. Hope that helped.

[Pert_UK]

49. Man that sucks....."disrepective" is a word now?

:evilgrin:

Yeah, little brothers can be a pain in the ass. Mine's great, but an ex-girlfriend of mine had a brother who you just had to hate....

He'd say things like, "Give me a lift to the party you stupid fucking bitch" when he was 15, and she'd do it......Unbelievable.

He's OK now though - they grow out of it.

P.

[REP]

50. He's Not "Oppositional;" He's A Spoiled Brat

Children that age are huge assholes. When the little shit acts up, IGNORE HIM. He wants the attention and has found that acting like an asshole gets him the attention he wants. Your parents may be falling for it, but you don't. When he misbehaves, ignore him. If his misbehaviour is dangerous, such as obscuring your vision while you're driving, stop the car and put him out. Dont get mad - that's what he wants.

"Oppositional" is a cop-out used by 'professionals' who lack the balls to tell parents that they've done a terrible job of child raising, and have succeeded in creating ill-behaved spoiled monsters. You don't have to buy into this bullshit.

[Aftershock]

52. You should smack him again.

For being a whiny little bitch. :evilgrin:

[truthspeaker]

53. All I have to add is this:

It's "disrespectful" not "disrespective".

I hope you are about to educate your brother that getting rides from other people is a privilege, not a right. You were doing him a favor.

[BiggJawn]

55. Calmly pull over to the side of the road...

And scream at him "GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE CAR RIGHT THIS FUCKING INSTANT!!!!!"

And make his punk ass WALK the rest of the way home.
And HELP him get out of the car if he's slow on the uptake.

And start looking for a place of your own so you can stop being the little shit's chauffuer.

Maybe he'll be decent and you can get along when he's about 30...

[LWolf]

56. If you were my sons,

you'd both get hell from me, and I don't care how old either one of you might be.

If I'm riding in someone's car, I don't criticize their music or direct their driving. (Except for my mother, who likes to look at me and talk, with plenty of two-handed gestures, while driving down the road. I will frequently request that she please watch the road.) If someone is riding in my car, I don't use my music or any other behaviors to make a point with them or to establish my dominance, either. They are my guest, and I treat them that way. If someone riding in my car endangered our safety, I would pull over, evict them, and allow them one phone call on my cell phone. Civilly.

If I helped provide my son with a car (and I have...both of them), and he used it to establish territory/authority/ over his brother, or as a means to bully his brother, I would take the keys. I don't care how many payments he might have made. Or how old he was.

If my son endangered someone when he was riding in a car at the age of 15, he wouldn't be going anywhere in anyone's car any time soon. After doing without travel for a few weeks, I'd then take him on several practice sessions where he could demonstrate how to be a passenger in someone's car. Then I'd put him on probation.

Having raised two sons, and dealt with their conflicts and competitions, I can confidently say that I would have kicked both your metaphoric asses, metaphorically speaking.

A healthy relationship with sibling/s as adults is worth cultivating.





Edited to say: Aren't you glad I'm not your mom? :evilgrin:

[HEyHEY]

57. What does he prefer; your voice or a buspass?

Though I can relate to the being ticked about singing thing ;-)

"How dare you hit your brother!" (?)
What did you guys never scrap - you're brothers!?

ANyway, conclusion, someone needs to beat the crap outta your brother.

[Surf Cowboy]

59. I would have kicked his ass. Well.

He would have come home too punch-drunk to cry to momma.

If that idiot brother of yours had caused you to swerve into oncoming traffic, what kind of thread would we be reading now?

That kind of stupid is dangerous, and par for the course for teenage males. The best thing you can do for him is take him to the E.R. one night and stand near the ambulance doors. He'll get to see what happens when teenagers act the fool in cars.

Imagine--he'll be driving in what? Under a year?

Don't feel bad about hitting him--he deserved it, and a bit more, if you ask me, which you did.

[roguevalley]

64. stupid little dipshit. Don't give him any more breaks. Tell him next time

he asks that he hasn't earned your trust and respect back. As for popping him, I once got into a serious fist fight with both my brothers and lived through it. Normal stuff as long as there aren't knives. Your brother is pushing you to make your old man notice him. My bet is he's sort of overlooked. Some folks get tired by the last kid.

[RFKHumphreyObama]

65. While some would consider this may be good practice for when you have kids

I don't think you should necessarily have to deal with this at your age. While I would consider that it was unfortunate that you hit your brother, it is also clear to me that your brother was acting very immaturely for his age and endangering the safety of not only the two of you but also other pedestrians or motorists who may have been on the road when he blocked your vision. His juvenile behaviour may well have cost an innocent life. That to me is unacceptable and totally inappropriate and is a valid enough reason to be very careful when giving him a lift in the future.

That’s just my personal opinion. I don’t want to offer any advice or suggestions because I’m not sure that I can offer anything very constructive

Believe it or not, I think your brother is going through a phase in his life. I think you'll find that you'll grow much closer when you grow older

[Lasira]

66. Wow, he sounds like MY brother!

I feel your pain. I'm 22, my brother's 17, and he is the biggest asshole I know, bar none.

My advice? Avoid him as much as your parents will let you, and move out when you get the chance. In the meantime, comfort yourself with the thought that you only have another four weeks or so until classes start again.

:)

[fujiyama]

67. Your brother sounds very immature

even for a fifteen year old. Considering he'll be on the road in a year, that would make me nervous to share the road with him.

Sticking a tennis racket in front of your face was very stupid, and make it clear to your parents what happened. You are older, and I assume more responsible than your brother. They should trust you over him.

Also if I were your dad, I would have told him to have stopped crying for something like getting punched by you (brothers fight...that's just how it is). A Fifteen year old boy crying for something like this is a sign of extreme immaturity.

Also make it clear to your parents that you won't drive him around for the safety of both of you, if he doesn't change his behavior. If he won't, tell him to find a friend with a car. He's 15. I'm sure he'll know some people that can give him rides.

[SmileyBoy]

68. Thanks everyone. Here's an update:

I have not talked to him (except for the apology) in over 2 days. I don't know if I can forgive him. I don't think my parents truly understand his behaviour (even though coincidentally, they're both psychologists). They seem to attribute it to saying "Oh, he's just a bratty little brother. They do things like that." But I observed my best friend and his little brother (who is 2-3 years younger than him) for many years, and I never saw him insult my friend or even be disrespectful to him when they were around me. But this kid will always find a way to insult me whenever he's with his friends, or in public in general. If I have a conversation with someone in public, he always tries to say something to me like "Dude, quit boring him!", or telling them something personal that I don't want them to know. He tried to insult me again at the dinner table tonight while I was having a conversation with me father, but I ignored him.

Also, His head is fine. I checked his head when I apologized to him, and it seemed fine then. And I still don't think he understands what he did wrong. He has shown me no respect in the past 18 months or so. Ever since he hit puberty, he's been like that. I understand how brothers can be like, but I can honestly tell you that if I hypothetically moved to China tomorrow, and never came back to see him again in my life, he probably wouldn't care. If I died today (Allah forbid), I don't think he would shed any tears. I really don't think he loves me.

And the worst thing is that he could take me on in a physical fight now. Even though I'm stronger than him, he's now taller than me. I don't know if he thinks his recently-found large stature has given him the idea that he can act like this towards his larger brother, and now he won't feel threatened by getting his ass kicked, because he can take me on now. When he was much smaller than me, he'd still act like a brat, but there was a line he knew he couldn't cross. I could easily show him what's-what if he crossed it. Now I think he's really pushing the envelope, and he knows he'll get away with it.

[BlondieK143]

70. Oh shit I can relate!

I'm the oldest of three girls. I'm 18, they're 11 and 13. When I lived at home (I moved out the day I turned 18), I swear, nothing I ever did was right when it came to those two. I love them, but I can't stand them. It gets especially bad when they start going through puberty. My mom pretty much blamed me for everything because I was the oldest, should've known better yadda yadda yadda. Well, I don't care what my mother says, if one of my sisters hit me, they'd get slapped back. And if they would've done that to me while I was driving (they would typically just fight with each other), the car would be pulled over and their asses would be sitting on the side of the road for a few minutes. That's dangerous and if anything, your parents should be grateful nothing happened to either one of you. I don't think you did anything wrong. This isn't a case of juvenile vs. adult. It's a brother thing. Plain and simple.

And those of you telling you to move out, don't listen. There's nothing wrong with being 22 and at home. You're putting yourself through school (probably with the help of your parents?) and an education is more important than a bachelor's pad.

[afraid_of_the_dark]

72. It's sad that your folks couldn't wait to hear both sides of the story...

There's also quite a large age gap between me and the rest of my sibs, and they used to use that to their advantage all of the time in dealing with my parents. My folks would always side with my sibs whenever they tattled on me (regardless if the reason for tattling was genuine or a fib designed purely to get me in trouble), never taking the opportunity to hear my side of the story. Granted, I wasn't an angel, and I was probably in the wrong more often than not, but when parents consistently sides with one child over another it creates a bad situation.

I know some people on the boards have advocated staying in your current living situation, but I have to say that for me, moving out was the best thing I could have done. Now that my sibs and I are not around each other constantly, we don't have the opportunities to get into the scuffles that we used to. However, I think what I lost by moving out for the reasons that I did was the opportunity to build good relationships with my sibs and my parents. I wouldn't say I'm close to any of my immediate family members; in fact, I wouldn't say that we have much of a relationship at all. I guess it was just the price I paid for my sanity.

Caveat: I was lucky that I had been able to save up enough money in high school to pay for my college expenses, my housing, and eventually my car. If your folks are helping you out financially, moving out may not be a feasible option. I wish you the best of luck in working things out with your family, and lots of patience in dealing with your bratty younger brother. :hug: