In need of support

[travisleit01]

Hi DUers... not to dump my problems on you, but I need some support. I just started college this week - trying to deal with that and scheduling and getting adjusted. My parents are at the beginning of a divorce, and a good family friend who is 74 is dying in the hospital, probably to be taken off life support this weekend.

I can't deal with all this at once... any support/advice appreciated :)

[Dookus]

1. just...

deal with one thing at a time. Don't let it all overwhelm you.

Keep up with your schoolwork - that's most important.

Support your parents as much as possible, but know that it's not YOUR responsibility to deal with their divorce. Stay out of the middle.

Go visit your friend in the hospital and say goodbye. Hold his/her hand and tell him/her what s/he means to you.

Then go back to school and hunker down. Make sure you get enough sleep.

I'm sorry you're going through so much at once.

[madmax]

2. You are not responsible for everything

You need to take care of yourself and your obligations, first. Do what you can one day at a time. I know this all sounds trite but, you shouldn't put yourself in a position to take responsiblitly for everyone and everything. You'll burn out and you won't be of any help to anyone.

Big hugs for you (((((((((travisleit01))))))))

[ScreamingMeemie]

3. Take care of You first and foremost. I am so sorry you are going through

these trials. All you can do for your parents is listen. All you can do for your family friend is care for his/her family. I'll be thinking of you and hoping your road smooths out soon.

Take care, Laura

[travisleit01]

4. Thank you all so much

I am really close to my mom, and we all know that divorce is the best thing because of my dad's alcoholism (he started drinking again after being sober for 16 mos.) The woman who is in the hospital is 74, we have known her for about 10 years when she was our neighbor and used to watch my brother and I. She is the sweetest old lady, my grandma's best friend.

And now I don't even know if college is right for me - nothing seems to interest me, I don't feel like registering for classes or partying like everyone here does. I'm going to be in so much student loan debt it will take me 10 years to pay it off! My roommate is real nice - popular, athletic, everything. This is just real hard.

But thanks for your support DUers :(

[madmax]

5. I understand, going thru a lot myself right now

so I can empathize with you. Be kind to yourself. It's not being selfish - it's survival :)

[LuLu550]

7. I'm sorry

to hear about you problems, but as others have posted, take on thing at a time and take care of yourself. Don't give up on school because you are overwhelmed.
Focus on one thing at a time.
Hope it works out OK for you.
:hug:

[Dookus]

8. travis...

Is this your freshman year? If so.... don't even THINK about whether college is right for you. You just got there. Give it a chance... at least a semester. Enjoy yourself a bit, take advantage of social opportunities when you can, and just enjoy the chance to meet a lot of new people.

[XanaDUer]

6. Good advice above

and see if your school has counseling services , too.

Good luck.

[UrbScotty]

9. Hoping for the best.

Stay calm, and the storm will be over sooner than you may realize.

:loveya:

[brook]

10. Not much I can add...

except to second the suggestion that you look into seeing a counselor at school. It's good to have an objective friend when life's crashing down around you. They often know where the air raid shelters are.

That said, don't take on the world's burdens. Prioritize. Distinguish between that which you can control and that which you can't. Make time to refuel yourself...walks....music...whatever has that cenetering effect on you.

I know it doesn't seem like it now - but -This too shall pass. Take care.