Worst versions of Christmas music?

[blondeatlast]

Gad--I heard a HORRIBLE version of "Blue Christmas" last night.

When I checked the info, it was by (gack) Sheryl Crow.

And I usually like her music, but this just REEKED. Off keyand she went "breathy," besides.

:puke:

[NuttyFluffers]

1. hmm, what is best christmas music?

that'd be a bigger challenge for me.

worked 2 retail jobs at one point, i am absolutely eternally cured of the holidays and all its music. nothing, except a, literally, divine version of ave maria could find its way into my heart anymore.

the worst would have to be some techno remix of a pop-country patriotic christmas song. or anything with synth from branson missouri. roughly the same thing.

[blondeatlast]

9. I shared your misfortune in the '80s.

Major department store, now gone the way of all locally-run business.

Muzak of well-known performers doing Christmas.

BAD. Just BAD.

[murielm99]

2. My son and I were sitting in a MacDonald's one year,

after some heavy shopping. It was after the dinner hour, and the place was nearly empty.

We were remarking on the bad Christmas music being played. Every selection was an odd version of a standard Christmas song.

The one that stuck in my mind was The Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies, played by three UKULELES!

:shrug:

[Left Is Write]

16. Ew. What would Tchaikovsky think?

[no_hypocrisy]

3. I walked into a music store and asked for some "bad Christmas music."

This is what I bought:

1. A John Waters Christmas, featuring Tiny Tim doing Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and Little Cindy singing Happy Birthday Jesus (A Child's Prayer), among others. Pretty bad.

2. Volumes I & II of An Alterred Christmas (An Offering by Rhan Wilson.) Old Christmas standards are recast in minor keys and alterred tempos, and believe me, Christmas will never be the same when you put these discs in the machine. (BTW, 50% of the net profits from the sale of these CD's are donated to AIDS services.)

[NuttyFluffers]

4. but a john waters christmas is so bad it's good thing.

i don't know if it qualifies as being the worst because it has redeeming value. that value being incredibly obnoxious and annoying the hell out of people who like christmas music.

[blondeatlast]

7. I have to agree there. If it's INTENTIONALLY bad, it doesn't count, IMHO.

It's when there was a sincere attempt made that went tragically wrong, like the Sheryl Crow debacle I had the misfortune to experience.

[Clinton Crusader]

5. saw a commercial last night for Jessica Simpson...

ACK! :puke: My dog does Christmas songs better! Just hideous!

[blondeatlast]

8. I don't have to hear it to know it has to qualify.

I was never a fan of that Berlin song, but I know when something has been butchered beyond belief when I hear it.

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

12. You beat me to "anything by Jessica Simpson", LOL.

[The Zanti Regent]

6. Mannheim Steamroller...

...from the same clowns that brought you C W McCall and "Convoy"...

[blondeatlast]

10. UGH. And everyone I know LOVES them.

Ugh, ad infinitum.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

13. Mannheim Steamroller

I believe I have that album, or one of those albums. If so, I'm sure I found it in the trash.

[BulletproofLandshark]

11. How about that version of "Jingle Bells"...

sung by a dog. Funny, and yet still terrible.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

14. barking "Jingle Bells"

Actually, I think it's funny.

[Left Is Write]

15. The dance remixes of classic standards I heard at the mall.

Absolute BLASPHEMY!

Also any beloved classic as remade by any pop tart; i.e. Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Ashlee Simpson, and their ilk.