Dec. 8 birthday people, what's our horoscope today?

[Mend]

[Rabrrrrrr]

1. Oh, the typical stupid horoscope shit that makes people think there's

some kind of "science" or system behind it. Lots of basic generalizations. Here, I'll write one for you:

Today, the market will fluctuate. You will have an unusual encounter with a stranger today, and will spend time with a friend you haven't see in a while. While out and about today, be wary of a man in a tie - I foresee that an encounter with him could lead to trouble, either physical or emotional; but do not shy away from all men in ties, for one will bring you something you have been looking for.

In the afternoon you can expect a feeling of oncoming darkness, which will progress into the evening. You will spend time in joy and singing with friends or family soon, and will also have a surprise visit from some in the near future. At the end of today, you will finally get a bit of privacy and rest that you've been longing for.

Today, your lucky numbers are 8, 13, 27, and 34.

[bloodyjack]

2. Happy birthday!

Sagittarius: (Nov. 22—Dec. 21)
You will suffer terrible pain and
emotional trauma, and all because
someone put a diving board where
it didn't belong.

source

[Mend]

3. somebody put

a president where he doesn't belong....