The Saturday Night STUPID JOKE THREAD!!!!!!

[CO Liberal]

Q - What's red & white on the outside, and gray on the inside?

A - Campbell's Cream of Elephant Soup.

[DeepGreen]

1. I like the licking dog !

[CO Liberal]

9. Thanks

I got it off an animated GIF site. I had it saved on my old PC, which is disabled right now by a virus. I'll see if I can find a link to it.

[DeepGreen]

13. Thanks

[Turn CO Blue]

2. Two blondes walk into a bar...

and the one says to the other, "Oh...you didn't see it either?"

[Turn CO Blue]

3. I had a really rough day. I had to fire my massage therapist...

he really rubbed me the wrong way!

[Shadowen]

4. Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.

Ba-dum kssssh!

[Turn CO Blue]

5. Q: What's a snowman's favorite song?

A: Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow!

[Deja Q]

6. I'd tell you a joke's punchline, which is 'a submarine', but the

lead-in would lock this thread faster than you can say "Schwing!" :evilgrin:

[CO Liberal]

7. I've Got a Clean Lead-In For That Punchline

The Army and the Marines are playing a basketball game, and the Marines all foul out. Who do they send in?

A sub-Marine.

:-)

[Deja Q]

8. Nice, LOL!

:yourock:

I still like the dirty version... O8)

[gtp1976]

10. A horse walks in to a bar...

...bartender asks, "Why the long face?"

bada bing. :-)

[CO Liberal]

11. What's Brown and Sticky?

A stick.

:-)

[New Earth]

12. you want a REALLY stupid joke? ok fine

What's worse, a blonde who doesn't get blonde jokes, or a blonde who gets them and laughs at them?

[immoderate]

14. Why does a chicken coop have two doors?

Because if it had four doors, it would be a chicken sedan!

--IMM

[CO Liberal]

15. What Yellow and Goes "Click Click"?

A ball-point banana.

:-)

[CO Liberal]

16. How Can You Tell There's an Elephant In Your Refrigerator?

You can't close the door.

:-)

[andino]

17. Why did the math teacher die?

Her number was up.

[gtp1976]

18. You know what the white part of bird shit is?

It's bird shit, too. LOL

[Carson]

21. Not to be a party pooper (no pun intended) but the "white" part is the

bird's urine. The dark "speck" is the shit.

[CO Liberal]

19. Why Was The Young Cannibal Expelled From School?

He was caught buttering up the teacher.

:-)

[Carson]

20. Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?

A: Right where you left him.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
A: Because he was dead.

Q:Why did the chicken fall out of the tree?
A:Because he was stapled to the monkey.

(Jokes courtesy of my son)

[auntAgonist]

22. more...

Q: How many balls of string would it take to reach the moon?
A:Just one if it's long enough!


Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Holes all over Australia.

[CO Liberal]

23. Why Did The Elephant Fall Out of the Tree?

The rhinocerous pushed him.

:-)

[another5bdem]

24. How to Catch a Polar Bear

First, cut a hole in the ice. Open a can of peas, and place them, one by one, around the hole. Hide nearby. Then, when a polar bear comes over to take a pea, kick him in the ice hole.

:bounce:

[WilliamPitt]

25. Horse walks into a bar

Bartender asks, "Why the long face?"

[sakabatou]

26. Got one

A gentile aks his mother, "How was your your day?"

She answers, "Fine."

[CO Liberal]

27. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?

You neek up on him.

:-)

[pintobean]

28. What do you do if you have an elephant with 3 balls?

Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

[CO Liberal]

29. Why Do Elephants Wear Tennies?

Because ninies are too small, and elevenies are too big.