"I cut it up wrong, give me my money back": The Customer of the Day

[jmowreader]

A customer walked into my store today to return nine rolls of hardware cloth (it's like chicken wire but it has square holes) that were eight inches wide by 25 feet long.

Hardware cloth doesn't come in eight-inch-wide rolls.

So we asked the guy, "why are you returning this?" He said he was bringing it back because he cut it wrong--he wanted it nine inches wide, not eight--so he wanted his money back so he could get three-foot-wide rolls.

It gets better: it was Lowe's hardware cloth. Said "Lowe's Companies" right on the label. Mine has the address of the Store Support Center in Atlanta on it.

Naturally, we denied the return. "Why?" (I swear, there are people out there who have balls so big they have to move them with a forklift.) Well, you cut it up for one thing, and you bought it at Lowe's. "Who cares where I bought it? I want my Mother Fucking money back. Let me speak to the manager."

I called the manager. He came up, looked at the cart, told the guy he wasn't getting any money back from this store, and walked off.

Just before he stormed out, he screamed that he was never going to shop in THIS store again. Gee, it looks like you didn't shop here before...

[melnjones]

1. hee hee, truly amazing... nt

[livinbella]

2. oh the joys of customer service!

customer service burned me out

[LifeDuringWartime]

3. bwahahaha

if you got his name, make sure he isn't allowed to shop there in the future ;)

[knight_of_the_star]

4. What a dumbass!

Some people SHOULD be sterlized for the future purity of the gene pool.

[Ravenseye]

5. People are just so stupid. (n/t)

[Sparkly]

6. "Here's your sign!"

(The "I'm Stupid" sign.)

Edited to explain: From Bill Engvall.
http://www.billengvall.com/content/home.html

Can't find any of his quotes on his website, but there are some here, of all places:
http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/heresign.htm

Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid." That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me...oops...never mind, didn't see your sign."

It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a NOBR>U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big ol' stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."

I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it. "Alright, Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good... They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it."

[Schema Thing]

you shoulda spit on him and gouged his eyes

.... er sorry, my emotions talking. It's funny, people trying to steal stuff doesn't really bother me nearly so much as people trying to insult other people's intelligence.

[Stinky The Clown]

7. Too.Damned.Funny!!!!!!

Thanks for making my day!

That's the funniest thing I've read on DU in ages. Nothing political. Just the stupidity of some people's personal human condition.

[liberalhistorian]

8. This is why I'm sooooooo glad

I don't have to deal with that shit, aka customer service, anymore! Frankly, cs workers just ain't paid enough to deal with the daily bullshit. BTW, there's a hilarious web site devoted to the stupidity of customers, I think it's called customerssuck.com.

[Shoeempress]

9. I will bet he had a chimpy bumper sticker on his vehicle.

[warrens]

10. Everyone is all upset about Best Buy

And their program to identify good customers and discourage bad ones from shopping there. Buttheads like that are the reason.

Among the MANY scams are the guy who returned a PC...he'd bought the whole thing just to steal the video card, then returned it the next day. Another guy claimed his camcorder didn't work. The tape was still in it so they took it out and played it. The idiot took it with him off the high dive, into the pool. And on and on.

Forklift indeed.

[personman]

11. Ugh

I was a computer tech for 3 years.
I hated people BEFORE I started there.
I would rather eat stuff Fear Factor rejected then go back.
People jobs suck.

[arwalden]

12. What Would He Have Paid For It Originally?

[fluffernutter]

13. rofl! great story, people never fail to amaze me.

[MrSandman]

14. Lowe's already denied the return...nt

[HippyLongstocking]

15. Hi

I'm new here. :) Nice to meet everyone.

WarrenS -- what do you mean "this thing with Best Buy wanting better customers" (paraphrasing)? I have horror stories about that place, so if there is a list, I'm prolly on it!

[salin]

17. welcome to DU

I have no answer to your question, but wanted to say welcome to the forums!

[Left Is Write]

16. "Well, sir, in order for us to give you your money BACK,

you would have had to give it to us in the first place!"

What a ballsy idiot. Be glad he's never shopping your store "again." :)