You Know You're a Pothead When...

[Sannum]

You Know You're a Pothead When...


You think the song "Truckin'" by the Grateful Dead should replace the national anthem.

Your music collection is worth more than your vehicle.

Your bong is taller than your dog.

It takes you more than 30 minutes to roll a joint.

You set your wedding date for 4/20.

You take off April 20th every year and treat it as a holiday.

You spent your last bit of money to score some herbs and don't have enough gas money to get home but you don't care.

You start every sentence with - uhhh!.

You intentionally roll seeds in your joints on independence day so you can hear the popping because you don't have money to buy fireworks.

You eat at Taco Bell more than 8 times a week.

You wear sunglasses at night, and see better.

You go to the corner store and the clerk automatically tosses a pack of rolling papers on the counter.

Your pot tray is fuller than your refrigerator.

Your bong gets washed more than your dishes.

You sell your car for gas money

You are the only tobacco smoker in the room and you look at the cigarette in the ashtray and ask, "Is that my cigarette?"

You're eating something on your way home thinking about what you're gonna eat when you get home!

Every cylinderical object you see, turns into plans on a new smoking device....

Just to be religous, you observe 4:20 in every time zone.

Someone has ever come up to you on the street and said "Hi" and you said "Yep."

You thought the ebola virus was a type of weed.

You think being stoned to death would be a damn good way to go out.

You have ever smoked pot before 8 o'clock in the morning.

You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other pothead friends.

[Bouncy Ball]

1. Ok I have a question

where do people get this stuff?

I'm not looking for names or phone numbers, mind you, but there's not a single frigging person I could ask for pot. And actually get some.

Well there are my two uncles who probably could but if I ask THEM they'll know I was ASKING.

And there is every 13-17 year old around here I could ask who could get it in a heartbeat from their friend "Pedro" but no thanks, I'm not into procuring from children.

How do you even FIND OUT who has it? Is there a code word or a hand signal to identify one pot friendly person to another?

This is something me and my friends have discussed in disgust. We literally cannot find a safe source.

[bobthedrummer]

4. Musicians always have hook-ups that are pretty cool.

For cannabis that is.

[Bouncy Ball]

5. Well dammit

I don't know a single musician.

Sorry I'm a bit frustrated. I know it's all around me, but damn if I can find any.

[goodboy]

36. you know me...well, now you do.

[goodboy]

35. yup...

[stupid grin]

7. lmao, in another time and place we've had this conversation

and it still cracks me up. You just don't *know* people. ;)

[Bouncy Ball]

9. Hey I remember that!

Well, guess what, I still can't find any. What's wrong with me? I'm cool. What kind of vibes do I have to give off?

Seriously, is there a lapel pin I can wear to identify me to possible sources? Is there a tune I should hum as a signal?

[stupid grin]

16. Just go around saying

"hey, it's 4:20" to every guy wearing a beard and long trenchcoat. You should get lucky.

[Bouncy Ball]

18. Now THAT'S an idea!

If they aren't into it, they won't really know what I mean (or if they do know, they'll only vaguely know and I can cop ignorance) and if they do know and smile, they I know they know!

LOL!

I think I won't do that with every guy with a beard and a trenchcoat, though. Think I'll stick with friends of friends for now.

;-)

[mitchtv]

11. since I moved to Socal I have to depend on Partner's nephews

all older than 21, but I have to sneak around. What a shame, in Norcal i was never without- I lived on a vinyard.Living in the country, I let my sources dry up. Scandalous depending on kids to cop.

[bettyellen]

17. let's see ... there's the ghetto method..

you know, isn't there any street corner action ... where you might score a dime?
or else you might have to infiltrate a college bar and ask just somebody. that's what sucks, you gotta ask somebody no matter what. but if your nice and say you just want a pinch and overpay... you could get lucky! but you gotta go where you might fing it.... hmm any good reggae shows coming up?i'm not kidding!
i grew up in the bronx where we had phony bodegas that sold nothing but weed. now i'm outta touch with that. now i have a friend who has a friend.

[Bouncy Ball]

22. Yeah huh, good for you living in New York!

LOL!

Let's see, the ghetto method a bit unsafe. There are areas I could go after dark but um, no thanks.

The college bar method.....I'm too lazy and not into bars anymore.

Concerts are often good, but only for sharing one with a particularly generous soul grooving out to the Cure or something. And maybe I'm weird but I left my sharing with total strangers days behind in 1988, at the Momentary Lapse of Reason Pink Floyd concert in Dallas when I realized one joint had gone all the way down the row and back to me. Ug.

Sigh.

[mark414]

33. we got a corner store in milwaukee like that

just a little old shop with the apartment above it set up...

it's just this guy, his wife and their son...the son's got the hookup...just gotta ask for the special...

[sandnsea]

24. Oh come on

I haven't smoked in 25 years, but still... the coffee shop, art galleries, glass blowing shop, art class at college, the friggin' bar... then again, this is Oregon so I could probably just go next door...

[Bouncy Ball]

27. Uh yeah.

And when you don't want the whole world's judgement you don't tend to ask the neighbors, your family members, etc.

I know one guy but he is a total repuke. I don't know where he gets it but he ALWAYS has pot. I am not asking him.

I would imagine it is much easier to find in Oregon than in Texas.

[sandnsea]

30. Much easier

And no judgement. OTOH, it's just delightful when your teenagers tell you so-and-so's parents sell pot for a living. I'm serious, be careful what you wish for. In the meantime, try hanging out at a coffee house.

[sportndandy]

25. Dishwashers and other restaurant staff.

Hang out behind a mexican restaurant and ask the cooks and the bus staff when they come out on break.

[Bouncy Ball]

28. Yikes.

Why does it have to be illegal? It makes NO sense for it to be illegal!

I can go to the liquor store and buy enough alcohol to get me drunker than Cooter Brown and that's perfectly legal, but God forbid anyone should smoke some little herb.

Heck, you can get loopy on antihistamines, but weed? Nooooo, that's illegal.

It makes no freaking sense.

I want them to sell it in STORES.

[mitchtv]

2. sorry, I must be dense or something

(I am older) I don't get the 4/20 bit

[Bouncy Ball]

3. April 20th

supposed to be the day everyone lights up.

[stupid grin]

8. Oh, I thought it was Earth Day.

[DS1]

14. It IS the day everyone lights up, in fact in Burlington VT the local

University has a smokeout, where the cops allow everyone to light up on the front lawn but not leave the place high. They have to go back inside, but those are the only rules.

[mac56]

13. 4/20, 4:20, and all its variations

became a slang phrase for pot. No one quite remembers why. Some say that "420" is some kind of police code for a drug bust. Some say there are 420 active ingredients in marijuana smoke. Far as I know, neither of these things is true.

I think a bunch of high school stoners back in the 70s just decided that 4:20 in the afternoon was the time they'd get together and torch up. And the phrase just took off.

[sportndandy]

21. 420 is California Highway Patrol code for pot smoking in progress.

[Bouncy Ball]

23. No it's not

see the snopes link below.

[sportndandy]

26. I'm supposed to believe that?

Maybe its true. Me and my friend Jim popularized the use of the word "dude" one night when we were just screwing around. Right.

[Bouncy Ball]

29. Did you read the link?

420 simply isn't, nor has it ever been, the code for pot possession for the California Highway Patrol. Sorry.

[Bouncy Ball]

6. If you have ever gone into a store and bought

a tobacco pipe and two large boxes of Froot Loops and that's ALL.

[Dez]

10. 4.20 pm.. time to spark up!

comes from a police code for pot violation

[Bouncy Ball]

15. Here's the link to snopes about it

http://www.snopes.com/language/stories/420.htm

[ZoCrowes]

12. Hey!

I REPRESENT THOSE REMARKS!!

[EstimatedProphet]

19. Deadheads wouldn't say Truckin should replace the national anthem

Darkstar, maybe, or Wharf Rat, or Jack Straw. Certainly Estimated Prophet. Not Truckin though...:)

[sportndandy]

20. Uhh no way dude

Only one of the above applies to me. I get high EVERY morning before 8:00. I'm gonna go get high for the fifth time today after I write this. I average 4 times a day every day for the past twenty years. You can do the math because I can't. I don't get any of the jokes, but I am still quite sure that I am a pot head.

[stupid grin]

31. How do you function if you don't get high?

Do you smoke it for anxiety or pain? Or is it just recreational? Could you comfortably make it through a day sans pot? When you're done reading this, will you remember what I've just asked you? ;)

[mitchtv]

32. I used to say, "things you like to do...

you'd rather do stoned, and, things you don't like to do ... you can only do stoned".
and as the fabulous furry freak brothers say "dope will get you thru times of no money, better than money will get you thru times of no dope".

[kodi]

34. "You Know You're a Pothead When... you sell your crack for weed"

and that is a serious habit.