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Hey guys! Wanna read the best fucking lyrics ever written?

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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 02:47 AM
Original message
Hey guys! Wanna read the best fucking lyrics ever written?
Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you: "Metal Inquisition," by....Nasty Disaster.


http://pages.cthome.net/NastyDisaster/inquis.htm





Verse 1:
Riding out on horses
Made of steel and might
We kill, maim and hack,
To fight the Metal fight
With leather, spikes and chains
We blaze throughout the land
Killing homo poseurs
The Metal Bible in our hands

Pre-Chorus 1:
For Metal's Glory, We kill, kill, kill!
Don't resist us, or your guts will spill!

Chorus 1:
Metal Inquisition, Holy Metal mission
Iron intuition, we'll beat you into submission

Verse 2:
From the wrath of Metal
None shall be free
False men, women and children
Will rot in Hell eternally
We don't hear the cries
Mercy is not our game
And when the crusade is over
Only Metal Gods remain
Pre-Chorus 2:
Homo-wimp poseurs will die, die, die!
Cut out their hearts and burn out their eyes!
Chorus 3:
Metal Inquisition, A deadly sonic incision
Metal Inquisition, A godly army on a mission
Bridge 1:
Metal Inquisition!
Metal Inquisition!
Pre-Chorus 3:
We ride now to battle a million strong
And when we win we'll sing this song
Chorus 3:
Metal Inquisition, A deadly sonic incision
Metal Inquisition, A godly army on a mission
Bridge 2:
Metal Inquisition!
Metal Inquisition!




------------------------------------------------------------------------


No, I didn't make these up. An actual band, comprised of sentient humans, composed this wonderous, gossamer poetry of the ages.

Don't ask me how I found this. Just don't.
* Return to Home Page
* Return to Lyrics Page
------------------------------------------------------------------------
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:00 AM
Response to Original message
1. ROTFLMFAO!
Edited on Sun Dec-19-04 03:00 AM by Book Lover
By my lack of god, that is the funniest thing ever. I swear that I am wiping tears from my eyes. I think I hurt myself when I fell...
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:03 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. Innit great?
Believe it or not, it's NOT a parody.
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fnottr Donating Member (365 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:07 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. no shit?
I was thinking of GWAR the entire time I read that.
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:13 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. Well, shit
I'd pay to see them play...
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WCGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:25 AM
Response to Original message
5. Don't resist us or your guts will spill....
Yea, sounds like christian metal to me....

If there truly can be such a thing....
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:27 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. Well, it rhymes with "Kill, kill, kill."
I don't think we're talking about Christians here. When they refer to "The MEtal Bible," I BELIEVE they're talking about Judas Priest's "Sin After Sin." But I could be wrong.
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WCGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:31 AM
Response to Reply #6
7. I'm not a metal head but this song sounds like a mess
some kids sitting around after watching Conan and trying to be "heavy" man.....
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:46 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. Which is why it's comedy gold.
:smile:
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WCGreen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:57 AM
Response to Reply #8
13. You got it.....
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:49 AM
Response to Original message
9. nah..these are the best
I eat antipasta twice
Just because she is so nice, Angelina
Angelina, the waitress at the pizzeria

I give up soup and minestrone
Just to be with her alone, Angelina
Angelina, the waitress at the pizzeria

Ti vol-glio be-ne
Angelina I adore you
E vol-glio be-ne
Angelina I live for you

E un pas-sio-ne
You have set my heart on fire
But Angelina
Never listens to my song

I eat antipasta twice
Just because she is so nice, Angelina
Angelina, waitress at the pizzeria

If she'll be a my My Car-ra mi-a
Then I'll join in matrimony
With a girl who serves spumoni
And Angelina will be mine!


Copyright ©2002-2004 LyricsBox.com
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:53 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. Ogida, my goombah...
"Ogida, my goombah in the panzo
When I eat, he gets a treat like a gonzo
He loves every meal
Every bite that I steal
Ogida, my goombah in the panzo!"

-Danny Aiello (author unknown)
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regnaD kciN Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:53 AM
Response to Original message
10. Sorry, they don't qualify...
You describe them as "the best fucking lyrics ever written," but a quick examination of the text reveals that there are, in fact, no lyrics about fucking anywhere in the song.

:evilgrin:


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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 03:55 AM
Response to Reply #10
12. Well, if I'd claimed that they were the "best GODDAMNED lyrics
ever written, " then that'd be the whole truth, wouldn't it?

And I wouldn't want to reveal too much.....
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ET Awful Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 07:48 AM
Response to Original message
14. I don't know, I think their "Sluts of Metal" is better :)
http://pages.cthome.net/NastyDisaster/slut.htm

I mean who can forget such classic verses as:

Backstage lookin' in my eyes
You want the power between my thighs
Hittin' hard like a runaway train
Burst out your eyes and melt your brain
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shadowknows69 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 09:27 AM
Response to Original message
15. BER-ZER-KER
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asthmaticeog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 09:47 AM
Response to Original message
16. Inquisitions were a popular metal motif, I guess.
Behold my favorite record cover:

And the lyrics:

We're the metal inquisition, we've come to search you out
Once you to see things our way, you won't have any doubt
You better wear some leather, you better wear some chains
Don't try to resist us, it'll only bring you pain

We'll hunt you down like animals, we're going to have a chase
We'll beat you till you're senseless, we'll never leave a trace
We'll round you up for trial, we'll bust you on the spot
We'll treat you all like criminals, you'll be a sorry lot

And if you're not a metal head you might as well be dead
We're the metal inquisition... We sentence you to death... by guillotine!

We'll take you to our leaders, we'll take you to our court
Arrest you in the name of hell and play a deadly sport
And if we find you guilty, your punishment is death
You better look the other way, you'd better hold your breath

So if you're in a disco or in a country bar
You better get the hell out, we know who you are
You better get some metal and play it really loud
You have the chance to join us, the mighty and the proud
But if we catch you punking, you know the penalty
We'll come down with a vengeance, we'll never set you free

We're the metal inquisition, we're not too hard to find
Don't get any closer, we might just blow your mind
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-19-04 09:57 AM
Response to Original message
17. Did you borrow that cd from Josh Strength?
:D
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