Deflated SpongeBob Found Stabbed On Side Of Road

[matcom]

<snip>

That's one resilient sponge.

SpongeBob SquarePants, missing from a Beaver County Burger King since Thanksgiving, was found lying on the side of a Beaver County road earlier this month.

He had been stabbed twice and was covered with dirt and mud, said Frank Bell, vice president of programming for Froggy radio stations in Pittsburgh.

A couple found the deflated 50-pound inflatable and brought him in to the Froggy radio stations, which had been offering a $1,000 reward for the return of the sponge.

"When it arrived, it had been stabbed several times and it was filthy," Bell said. "We've been working for several days trying to get him patched up."

They succeeded and at 10:30 this morning, SpongeBob -- in all his yellow glory -- was slated to be returned to the Chippewa Burger King and reinflated to his full nine-foot size.

No one knows who took SpongeBob or why.

http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/tribune-review/trib/pmupdate/s_285674.html

[Cooley Hurd]

1. HATE CRIME!!!

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=102x1091223

Our SpongeBob, who art in Heaven...:evilgrin:

[Karenina]

5. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Spit, sputter... BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

[arwalden]

6. LMAO!!

[DarkSim]

2. Damn matcom... this is your 6th strange thread within the last 10min? n/t

[matcom]

4. its what i do

:D

MatcomNews is here to serve you

[CatWoman]

13. HAH!!!

You ain't seen nuttin yet!!! :D

[livinginphotographs]

3. Spongebob was running with the wrong crowd.

I heard that this was a drug deal gone bad.

[underpants]

7. From Bikini bottom to Beaver County

A long and sad journey

[Bronco69]

8. At the risk of sounding sexist

I think this is only the second time I've ever seen the words "beaver" and "sponge" in the same sentence. :-)

[kmla]

9. Plankton has been implicated in the incident.....

The bloody knife, as well as a tiny pair of muddy shoes, were found in the janitor's closet at 'The Chum Bucket'.



A warrant has been issued for his arrest.

[Zuni]

10. Whoever did this will kill again

It was a disorganized offender, possibly high on drugs. Late teens to early twenty, perhaps more than one culprit. The sheer violence of the attack suggests delusions/ paranoia.
Whoever did this will kill again.

:tinfoilhat:

[Beware the Beast Man]

11. Heheheh...I used to live near Beaver County

No joke!

[matcom]

12. drove through Beaver Utah once

their welcome sign has a cartoon beaver "spreading" :D