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anyone else into "techniques of listening or interpersonal communication"

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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:28 PM
Original message
anyone else into "techniques of listening or interpersonal communication"
As in courses and classes? I took some college classes like 15 years ago and I still find myself employing the techniques in my life.

I still automatically go into some of the exercises in regards to people watching from afar and studying the non-verbal communication..

I'm a lone geek out there? or are there more of us?
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bobbobbins Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:29 PM
Response to Original message
1. is that the stuff that will teach you if someones lying
because they rub their nose a certain way? If so, i want in
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:38 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. Lol, well its definitely applicable, though mostly its interpreting the
whole range of communication to make your own communication more effective. Also being a great listener is something people will notice about you, and take advantage of your kind ear and tactful thoughts.

Its more about self improvement than trying to catch people lieing...
but yeah Im pretty adept at spotting even subtle lies.
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bobbobbins Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 03:04 PM
Response to Reply #3
17. what was that? i wasn't paying attention
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 03:09 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. you're lieing!
:P
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Webster Green Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:35 PM
Response to Original message
2. Hell no!
Why would I need shit like that!:evilgrin:
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:39 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. um okay,
feel evil much?
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:39 PM
Response to Original message
4. No but it sounds interesting.
I need more time. Stupid work.
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:42 PM
Response to Reply #4
6. Isnt it crazy how much shit we could learn and get done if we didnt have
to work!? lol..

all that sleep just waiting to be had as well.!!

:hi:
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redqueen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:47 PM
Response to Reply #6
9. Don't get me started!
:hi:
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:55 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. oh start! please please please start!
:spank: how is that for a start?!
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arwalden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:42 PM
Response to Original message
7. So What You're Saying Is That You Took Some College Classes
fifteen years ago and you're employing the techniques in your life even today.

If I understand you correctly, you automatically go into the exercises you learned with regard to people watching and how you observe their non-verbal communication.

:hi:
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:53 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. yes that is exactly what I am saying.
however I was also asking if anyone else is into these techniques, as well.

Your reply would seem to indicate a combination of humor/sarcasm (with love no doubt) in regards to this question. :hi:

and some of this :spank: just for fun... howzat for nonverbal communication! lol
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DELUSIONAL Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:47 PM
Response to Original message
8. Yes -- one of my degrees is more or less in that area
Very useful -- especially listening skills and the non-verbal skills.

Some people seems to have acquired this skills naturally -- it could be an innate ability for some people and learned skills in other people.

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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:58 PM
Response to Reply #8
13. Very cool... I knew thered be at least one other out there!
I dont know if I was a natural, but I took right to it and did extremely well in the classes. One of the few classes I ever took that had immediate and lasting impact in my life.

What is your degree? and are you working within that field?
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fluffernutter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
12. that does sound interesting, you big geek
;)

i did take Communication in college, and it is interesting. also some Psych classes touched on listening/communication techniques. i'm trying to remember if i payed attention, lol!

so what things do you notice from non-verbal communication? i'd love to hear. i am a big people watcher too. go ahead, call me a big geek too :P
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 01:06 PM
Response to Reply #12
14. well as an example
about a month ago, I was sitting in my car in a parking lot. I noticed a couple in car not to far away, the girl in the car works in my building and we say hi often but never talk. Well I noticed some wild gestures on her part... nearly frantic, and the guy just looked stoic while shaking his head. I dont know how I knew, but I felt right away that he was breaking up with her.

I couldnt see her face but I could just tell she was crying hard. She got out of his car right when I got ready to walk back in. I stopped her in the hall asked if she needed a shoulder and she bursted into tears again, hugged me for a few minutes and then she stiffened and got sorta embarassed I guess. She pulled away and laughed and thanked me and commented on how much of a mess she must look.

Ive seen here a few times since and she has just a big ol smile for me.

Sometimes I just want to find sad and depressed people, and just hug them and listen to them.. without judgement. just be there for a little leaning.

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fluffernutter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 01:26 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. see, now that's your soft side coming out.
you sweetie, you.

i have actually thought the same things ... i would love to be able to help sad people somehow.
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 01:45 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. nah, that was my hard side... my soft side makes most people
violently ill... like casting out demons of the posessed.

lol...
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Karenina Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 03:32 PM
Response to Reply #15
19. My favorite daily activity
is simply smiling at people.

Or telling an elderly woman in polite formal language how beautiful she looks in her outfit.

Or cooing at infants.

The best lesson I ever learned was STFU and LISTEN.
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frictionlessO Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 03:36 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. if everyone took the time to do this sort of stuff for others
the world would be so much more tolerant and thus easier to tolerate.
I think about some of the people Ive known of that have killed themselves and whilst there were probably a few that would've no matter what... I know that if some of these people had just had some kind of stranger/friend be compassionate towards them in a time of depression things might have been different...
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davsand Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Dec-28-04 03:41 PM
Response to Original message
21. Very useful in business settings.
I degreed in Communications (Oh so many years ago!) and I find myself applying techniques from Interpersonal Communications classes quite often.

Just to cite a couple of examples, I deliberately set my office up with a floor plan to facilitate openness comfort by putting the guest chairs behind and to the side of my desk--so there are no physical barriers between myself and the people sitting in them. It feels more "intimate" and less like a government wonk's office.

By the same token, when I need to control or "manage" a meeting, I have been known to use nonverbal signals to make my points.

I absolutely unnerved a guy who brought his lawyer with him in an attempt to intimidate me. He called me later to apologize for his attorney's behavior (as well he should have.) I'd managed to give him the feeling that I was mighty annoyed--all the while I was sitting there with nary a cross word out of my mouth.

I use observational techniques a lot with my staff, and it really helps me give them positive feedback when they need it most.

Speech Com techniques (along with group dynamics) are some of the most useful business tools I have ever had. I know that some folks pooh-pooh SP Com as the classwork the athletes took for an easy A, but I am convinced it was the best thing I ever studied, by far.


Laura


Laura
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