I have a story to tell and I want your opinions... was I smart or stupid?

[battleknight24]

A few days before Christmas, my friend and I took a short trip to Corpus Christi, TX to do some gift shopping. As we gassed up at a station near the mall (she gassed up while I went inside and paid cash) I walked back up and saw a blond haired girl talking to my friend while she was gassing up. I walked over to them and the girl was telling my friend that she was completely out of gas and she was wondering if either of us could spare any cash or loose change. She said she only needed a little bit since she lived in Calallen (near Corpus or considered part of Corpus, depending on how you look at it... ) She said she had called her dad but that he was drunk. I looked at her for a few seconds and looked at my friend for a few seconds. "You guys are welcome to look at my gas gauge if you like."

I know it might sound like I am naive... but I think its either 1) my heartstrings are a little easy to pull 2) I have trouble saying no- I don't know HOW to say no, even to someone I am not sure is being dishonest.

I let her five bucks. Yeah, yeah I know... flame away.

By the way, just now, I read this article on www.snopes.com

http://www.snopes.com/crime/fraud/distress.asp

What do you guys think?


Peace,

[shraby]

1. It didn't hurt a thing.

You did what was the right thing to do. If she was ripping you off, that's her problem. 5 bucks isn't that much and you're conscience is clear.

[battleknight24]

4. Yeah... that's what I keep trying to tell myself...

... besides, I had absolutely NO intention of giving her more than that.


Peace,

[Bouncy Ball]

5. What shraby said.

You did nothing wrong.

[sandnsea]

2. My dad does one of two things

He says, Let's get your car and I'll put some gas in, OR offer them a job. He's never had to part with any money on either count. But they really get pissed at him when he yells across the gas station, at their new "target", "I just offered that guy/gal a job". It must be a southern thing, I've never had that happen where I live. I get hit at the grocery store.

But hey, it's only five bucks. No biggie really, in the scheme of things. And if my daughter ever really were broke and out of gas, I'd hope someone would help her!

[qnr]

3. I'd have done it, but I'd have made sure that it actually went into

his/her gas tank.

[Bouncy Ball]

6. One time in July

an old lady was standing on the side of a busy road, pretty far from a gas station, waving around a gas can and a couple of dollar bills to the cars going by. There was a police car in front of me and I thought for sure he'd stop, but he looked over and kept going, so I pulled into the parking lot next to her and she explained she was out of gas and would I take this gas can and this two dollars of hers and get gas and bring it back. It must have been 103 degrees out and she looked like she was going to have heatstroke.

The gas can had a cork with a stick in it as a lid. I took it, used my debit card to fill up the gas can and pocketed the two dollars. I didn't want to make her feel bad by not using the money for the gas, but I wanted to give her more than two dollars worth, so I totally filled it up (don't remember how much it was but it was one of those BIG ass gas cans, a lot more than two dollars). Took it back and poured it in for her. She eventually said "That's a lot of gas!" and I just said yeah and handed the empty can to her. She said God bless and I made sure her van started, then left.

Why didn't that policeman stop to help her? I like police generally and unless he had a call to go somewhere I don't understand why he wouldn't pull over.

Oh yeah, my point is, while I would have done the same thing you did, I DO feel a lot better personally getting the gas so I know it's not a rip off, but I'm sure I HAVE been taken for a few bucks here and there. No biggie.

[Kenneth ken]

7. don't know if you were smart or stupid

but you were kind, and that's always a PLUS!

Good for you.

[saracat]

8. And she did offer to let you look at her gas guage. Did you? You should

have pumped the gas for her. Did you ever see her car?

[battleknight24]

9. BTW, Here is some useful info so you can help keep...

... from getting scammed.

From www.snopes.com ...

How To Avoid Falling Victim To 'Distressed Stranger' Scams:

These sorts of scam work because the amounts pleaded for are relatively small, and people want to help others, both for the ordinary feel-goodness of it all and as a form of karmic protection against those inevitable days when their cars break down or when they are chagrined to discover they've left their wallets on the dresser at home. While fraud is sorry repayment for a kind heart and generous nature, the only way to entirely safeguard yourself against falling victim to "stranger in distress" scams is to refuse to help those unknown to you who appear to be in dire straits. Such a course of (non) action will appeal to some but will be heartily eschewed by others who will view the occasional $20 lost on a con artist as but the cost of maintaining a positive view of their fellow man. Therefore, portions of the following advice will apply to some but not to others.
Beware the pull on your heartstrings — it's often the pursestrings that are actually being reached for. When approached with tales of woe, keep in mind those making the request should have other avenues of relief available to them beyond that of asking random strangers for cash. Is it reasonable to assume they have no family or friends who could come to their assistance, either monetarily or to give them a drive home? Or that they do not have so much as one credit card they could charge a necessity against? Remind yourself that a great many taxis do accept credit cards and so regard with suspicion any well-heeled stranger's claim of needing $20 for cabfare.


When strangers seeking your assistance hit you up with sob stories, become comfortable with saying "No, I'm sorry but I just can't do that" and walking away or hanging up. If you cannot bring yourself to say no and instead feel you must make some attempt to aid those who appear to be in need, proffer your assistance rather than the cash that has been asked for. Offer to telephone on their behalf whichever friend or relative the stranded couple believes could come for them, or to ask the police for help in getting the child home. Insist that mugging victims contact the police and indeed place those calls for them. Strictly limit your help to non-monetary forms: making phone calls, brainstorming possible solutions, mucking about under the hood of non-functioning cars, etc. But above all, keep your hand away from your wallet.


Never let strangers into your house to use the phone. Instead, offer to place whatever calls they need made on their behalf. Likewise, those seeking the use of a bathroom should be given directions to the nearest gas station or restaurant. People have been robbed or sexually assaulted in their homes by those whose "car broke down" or who needed "a glass of water" or "to call a doctor for the baby." Those not assaulted immediately still run the risk of being burgled later by thieves who have inventoried the home's contents are are now familiar with its layout.

[tavalon]

10. Was it the last money you had?

Probably not. So what if she lied. You did what was right for you. Good on ya.

[roguevalley]

11. remember the old parable. you never know when you will come

across an angel. any act of kindness is never a waste.

[Elise]

12. If someone asks me for money,

and I have some to share ............. I do so willingly w/o any strings.

This is the way I prefer to live.

I figure if they need it so badly they will ask a stranger for it, as long as I can part with some, I will give it to them ............. and I don't care if people believe me to be naive or not.

[Rhiannon12866]

13. I don't know what I would have done, since I wasn't there

But it was the holidays and you were showing compassion to a stranger. This is never a bad thing, whether she was sincere or not. I salute you.:-)

[Nikia]

14. It was a good thing to do

You can't know for sure if she really needed the $5 for gas or not, but... Five dollars isn't a lot of money unless you really needed that money for something else. If she really needed that money, you did her a great favor. There is nothing to feel bad about. I have given small amounts of money to people for lesser things if I didn't desperately need that money myself.

[bowens43]

15. It's never stupid to be kind.

[TreasonousBastard]

16. You were probably scammmed, but so what...

happens to all of us. And there is the chance, slim as it might be, that she really was out of gas. For a lousy five bucks, trust your gut and you can't go wrong giving it. Even though some say it encourages petty grifters, there will be one time when you give a couple of bucks that really means something to somebody.

All year long I get people in my neighborhood needing the last 50 cents to get on the bus or get some food. Some of them you get to recognize after a while. Depending on my mood, and theirs, sometimes I throw them some spare change, or maybe even a buck. I figure that's their job, begging for spare cash, and it's a lot tougher than my job.

It's not the sort of thing to make a habit of, though.

[hyphenate]

17. If you had the money, and the woman

did appear genuine, you did the right thing.

Currently, there is very little coming into my own coffers. I have none right now, except for food stamps, and a monthly "benefit" of $300. That's IT.

Yesterday, a guy was standing in front of a Dunkin Donuts asking for handouts. Considering I had just come from the welfare office, where I had to be issued a new card, and that I had $30 to my name (quite literally--I have no savings or any other assets), I knew that I was hardly the one to be asked. In the downtown area, there are several shelters, as well as the YMCA and other places, so I didn't think that he was going to go without his "coffee" for very long.

One day I went shopping. My car isn't working, so I've been having to take the bus a lot. I bought food, and asked for the customer service person to call me a cab, which they will happily do. I didn't have any money on me--I was going to use my debit/MC card to pay the cab, which would have been about $5. Well, the cab driver got there, and wouldn't take me home, saying he didn't take credit cards. I had to walk home, in what was about 80 degree heat, and it's over a mile, and for me right now, that's a very long walk, especially with a cart of groceries. I ended up home about an hour later, so exhausted that I took about another half hour or so taking up the groceries, and going into the bed for a few hours. I was still exhausted the next day. I did not have the temerity to "beg" for a handout, and no one even glanced my way on the walk home.

Most people won't ask for a handout, even if they only have a thin dime to their name. Others do it shamelessly. When I was living in L.A., we had one guy who was a "regular" at the end of the exit ramp. He stayed there on that corner as if it were his "job" to work the ramp. He disappeared for a week once, and we all joked he was in Florida on vacation. Most of us wouldn't give him a penny, and rightfully so.

Sometimes there is a legitimate need--I've been stranded once or twice, where I've had to ask (as a last effort) for money, but it's always been like 50¢ to make a phone call. I would never conceive of asking for more than that. And most honest people won't ask for help from strangers--they would call the police, a store manager, or other person who has the authority to help.

[RebelOne]

18. I would have said,

"Yes, but I'll gas it up for you."

[B Calm]

19. I drive an 18 wheeler and people hit me up every where

I go. If I like their story (even if I know its a fake), I'll give them 10 bucks. I always give money to the people who want my home address so they can send the money back to me. None have, but who knows maybe they'll strike it rich someday and remember the guy that helped them when they were down on their luck..