I am really in need of support today/tonight.

[foreigncorrespondent]

Well I have just arrived home from taking Sapphocrat to Melbourne airport for her return flight to the USA. The month has gone far too quick, in fact a month together isn't enough.

Right now I am really down. I cried all the way home from the airport (an hour and a half drive), and it was really difficult to drive through all the tears.

So I do want to share the emotions I am currently experiencing with our (Sappho's and my) supporters here on DU, and for others to get an idea of what it is like to be forced to live 8,000 miles apart from your lover, with no knowledge of when you will be back in each others arms again.

To refresh your minds, Sappho was heading down under to see me after an anonymous benefactor paid for her trip etc, and would be here for the entire month of September. Prior to that, we hadn't seen each other this yar at all. The last time we had seen each other was last year. That forced separation lasted a total of ten months.

Now we are begining yet another forced separation with no idea of when we will see each other again. From were it looks right now, we probably won't be seeing each other again until some time next year.

For those who don't realize or know yet, Sapphocrat and I are a binational lesbian couple. She is a United States citizen, born and bred, I am an Australian citizen born and bred. Due to unfair and rather discriminating immigration laws with in the United States, Sappho cannot sponsor me, her chosen life partner (we have been together for three and a half years) for immigration into the USA.

I can sponsor her to come here, and when I am feeling like I am right now I just want to tell her to sell up everything look for a job here in Melbourne, and move here, so we can begin our life together properly, without the bloody 8,000 miles between us, but I can't.

Sappho has family ties to the USA (she is taking care of her 82 year old mother) and is unable to move interstate, let alone overseas at this time, or any time with in the near future, so our only hope for happiness is for me to move to the USA, otherwise we will be living like this, for some time to come.

You all know that there are no jobs in the USA for American's, (Sappho is one of the Silicon Valley victims from the dot com crash of 2000, and hasn't been able to land a job since), so I have no hope of securing a job sponsorship anytime soon.

Sappho's and my ONLY hope is for the permanent partners immigration act (see: http://capwiz.com/hrc/issues/bills/?bill=1730251) so on behalf of Sappho and myself I am begging you all to find out if your rep is a cosponsor of this bill, if not, then please take 5 minutes out of your day or evening and drop them a letter asking them to come on board with this bill.

Sappho and I are not the only couples affected by the current immigration laws, but we are two people you have gotten to know over the years here on DU. Even though our situation doesn't affect your personally, please do consider contacting your rep.

As for my emotions. Right now I am just really very numb. This time yesterday I was with Sappho, and today I am sitting here at my computer, watching to see when her flight will land in Sydney, and then watching her next flight, to see when she will be on her way back home.

I am on the verge of tears again, but am trying to fight them back. Sappho and I only got 4 hours sleep last night, so I am drained, and crying will only drain me more. While sleep would be good, I don't want to go to sleep, because I don't want to fall into a depresive episode where all I want to do is sleep to make the days go by faster.

Thanks for the ear everyone.

FC

(For Sappho, I know you will most likely search out any posts I make over the next X amount of hours before you are home so I just wanted to tell you I love you, and am really missing you. AMLFYA xoxoxoxo)

[MuseRider]

1. This is such a sad

and horrible thing. I am so sorry, I can't imagine what this must be like for you both. My reps are both Repubs and have sent me the worst stuff when I bring this and other GLBT issues to them. No help from me and I am terribly sorry. I do support you and will continue to do all I can for you. I am so sorry.

[leftist_rebel1569]

2. I really do empathize

I did have a really big crush on a girl that lived over a thousand miles away from me. Now, I know it's not the same thing, but it's still the same general feeling. I'll see what I can do about e-mailing my senators and congressman about this bill, but I can't do it tonight. I'll try tomorrow. SO, just in case I forget, send me a PM tomorrow afternoon and I'll do it.

I wish you the best of luck :hi:

[madmax]

3. I promise

I will write my representatives and urge they support this bill. I will also send the link to friends. Please keep your spirits up, I know it's easy for me to say.

[philosophie_en_rose]

I'm really sorry.

Some day we'll be as progressive as Canada and Australia. I hope.

[alphafemale]

4. That is so unfair

:grouphug:

Many of us are working to change the President, change those policies and stop this unwashed nonsense that is hurting people who are just trying to live out their lives with dignity.

[Pale Blue Dot]

5. I bookmarked this thread

And I will be contacting my representative, but since one of them is Rick Santorum, I wouldn't get your hopes up. :-(

This really gets me upset. We have MILLIONS of heterosexual, so called "moral", couples in the US in which there is NOT ONE SHREAD of real love. Yet here is an obvious case of true love, that our "moral" country is attempting to stop.

fc, as my namesake says, "Don't dream it's over". I'm sending good vibes for a happy ending to your story that you'll be able to tell your grandkids!

[scarlet_owl]

6. Your post is so sad and I'm so sorry

I wish this was a more fair world. I'll write my congressperson just for the two of you. I want you to know that I'm sending prayers your way. On Edit: My congressperson supports the bill.

[jono]

7. I'm so sorry

I'm in a same-sex binational relationship, but we were very fortunate that my partner came to the U.S. with his parents, who were sponsored by family that was already here. FWIW, my rep has signed on as a co-sponsor, but I'll encourage others to support it as well. :hug:

[proud patriot]

8. Hugggsss

:-( I will write my policy makers

[mitchtv]

9. this galls me. It is one of my biggestgripes with PUKES

I had to become a felon and wetback my lover from Argentina inthru Mexicali/calexico(way back when) statute of limitations ago, in those days all south americans were held to rediulous standards to enter. Wellllllll, you can't stop loooooovve

[roughsatori]

10. Does Sapphocrat have a gay male friend who will marry you?

I had two gay American male friends who married so their lesbian best-friends' partners could live here.

I did not follow the details--but I remember them being worried about an interview where an inspector quizzes you both a year later to see if you really live together. They were worried, but said it was easy due to the fact that they all hung out a lot during the year, so knew a lot of the answers, as if they were a couple.

I think the women kept some of their things at the mens' apartments. I remember something about keeping an extra toothbrush and Tampax in the mens' apartment.

Good Luck, and it probably won't help, but there are so many people who can find no one that would be happy to have some one to love and love them back across the ocean.

Good Luck.

[WilliamPitt]

12. The very question I was gonna ask

[liberalhistorian]

11. This should be sent to every repuke

"family values" wingnut who believes that gays are "deviant perverts", and acceptance of the "homosexual agenda" (how dare those gays and lesbians expect equal and fair treatment just like everyone else, what do they think they are, human beings?) would destroy marriage and the free world, and who believe that gays and lesbians are promiscuous immoral perverts who don't know the meaning of the word monogamy, who don't have or want a "normal" relationship and hwo don't feel the same kind of pain "straights" do, and whose lifestyle is somehow a "threat" to so-called "traditional families." So gays and lesbians have loving, committed relationships like "normal" people, who'd a thunk it?

[Khephra]

13. I'm so sorry about all your problems

Be happy that you have someone, no matter where they might be. Not all of us are even that lucky.

[Susang]

14. What a drag for you two

I'm so sorry to hear about your situation. If there's anything we DUers can do, I hope you'll let us know. I'm hoping the best for you. :loveya:

[Booberdawg]

15. I was just thinking about you and Sappho today

wondering if it had been about a month and thinking she would be returning soon. I'm so glad you were able to spend this month together, but alas it was to have this bittersweet moment.

BIG HUGS:hug:

[foreigncorrespondent]

16. Just wanted to thank everyone who responded.

To answer the question asked by roughsatori. Sappho has a few gay male friends who would be more than willing to marry me, in order for us to be together. However Sappho and I discussed going the "illegal" route a long time ago and we both felt the risk we would be posing on our relationship isn't worth it.

If we were to get caught we would all be in trouble, I would be deported back to Australia and risk not being allowed back into the United States again, ever.

We love each other truly and unconditionally and would do anything to have me return "home" (SF became my home for the 15 months I did live there, and I still call it home to this day) except something illegal.

Even though we go through some truly tortorous pain because of the whole situation, we still feel it is better to do everything by the book, that way we won't have to be looking behind us at every turn.

When I was there for the 15 months, we always had the worry that I would receive a letter from the INS telling me my visa extension request had been denied and I would have to leave the country, hanging over our heads every day. It wasn't a nice feeling. It would cause all sorts of depression in the both of us, and that kind of feeling is something we don't want to experience again.

I did end up getting that letter in January of 2002 after applying for an extension after 9/11 (I was due to leave 9/13 back for Melbourne.) We had exactly 3 days and part of a fourth day together before I had to get out.

The only hope we have for being reunited and my moving to the USA to be with her permanently is through the Permanent Partners Immigration Act. If I had come from a country where gays and lesbians were persicuted I would have been able to claim assylum in the USA.

I just can't explain to any of you in words the emptiness I am feeling today. Nor can I explain the anger I feel towards the United States right now.

Since I was a little girl I wanted to live and work in the USA, little did I know it would be one of the hardest countries to try and settle in, all because I am in love with someone of the same sex. It really hit home hard when I realized a country I had long loved would not accept me because of people in that country being such haters.

It is sad when people can hate people so much. Yet no matter how much that country hates the person I am, I can honestly say I still love that country, even with all her faults. Apart from having the best damn partner I could ever have there, that country is one of the most beautiful countries I have ever experienced. All I can do is hope and pray that one day soon a bill will pass and become law and my partner will be able to sponsor me and bring me back home, so we can begin our life together.