DemoTex
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:31 PM
Original message |
Am I on the no-fly list .. and why? Not what you think. |
|
I am not a clothes horse. I buy relatively cheap jeans on the internet and wear them out. However, I did develop a penchant for Calvin Kline boxer shorts when I was still flying. I would get stuck in DC for a couple of weeks at a time (when I was commuting from Dallas), run out of clean undies, and run over to Nordstrom's at Pentagon City for clean underwear. I'd buy the gray Calvin Kline knit boxer shorts (a compromise between tighty-whiteys and loosey-gooseys).
Last month I had a very embarrassing incident (like a Flannery O'Conner story). I went to Dallas (1000 miles) to see my good doctor for my annual physical. When I "dropped trousers" I felt a breeze on my butt. My undies were in tatters! Horror! What did he think of me then?
So, I recently ordered 10 pair of CK undies on the internet @ $195. I know, I know .. but I don't need that lecture tonight. I took a pair out of the box and tried it on. Perfect fit. I took the other nine pairs out of their boxes and threw them all in the washer.
Clean, new undies. Great! I put on the first pair this morning. Good fit! Nice bulge, etc.! Then I took my B/P meds, including a diuretic. Within an hour I had to pee. No problem-o. Oh no, big problem-o! The $19.95 Calvin Kline underwear had no fly! I mean, WTF? How am I supposed to get my Leanon-Portadine out to do it's Watson trick? This is total BS!
Dear reader, what should I do? Boo-hoo, boo-hoo.
|
Bluebear
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:32 PM
Response to Original message |
1. I don't know, could you provide us a photo? |
|
It's a start, we'll go from there.
|
DemoTex
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:49 PM
Response to Reply #1 |
|
Edited on Wed Feb-02-05 08:56 PM by DemoTex
My complaints are with the frontal aspects of this product, however the rear aspects do seem to enhance the, well, ass.
|
madison2000
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:35 PM
Response to Original message |
2. I think we've all learned something about Calvin Klein tonight |
|
a moment of silence please
|
Skittles
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:35 PM
Response to Original message |
|
MAC YOU ARE IN DIRE NEED OF A SKITTLES ASS-KICKING; next time you're in Dallas look me up, I will ALWAYS be able to accommodate you! :7
|
DemoTex
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:53 PM
Response to Reply #3 |
8. Should I wear my new underwear for my ass-kicking? |
|
Important question, that. Maybe just a little spanking will do .. eh? Let's see .. I'll be back in Dallas in two weeks. Get your rack ready, Skitt.
|
Skittles
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 09:13 PM
Response to Reply #8 |
Catch22Dem
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:37 PM
Response to Original message |
|
I suppose it would be kinda nasty to return them. HAHAHAHAHAHA :evilgrin:
|
greatauntoftriplets
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:38 PM
Response to Original message |
5. LMAO....men's shorts without a fly??? |
DemoTex
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:58 PM
Response to Reply #5 |
10. Women must run the company. |
|
Revenge. I now, too, have to sit down to pee. Bummer.
|
greatauntoftriplets
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 09:01 PM
Response to Reply #10 |
11. I was thinking that when I posted .... |
|
but decided to bite my tongue, LOL.
|
Toby109
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:45 PM
Response to Original message |
6. You sure you didn't order |
|
the Eunuch Classic style?
:evilgrin:
|
DemoTex
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 08:55 PM
Response to Reply #6 |
9. Maybe they are panties! |
|
Damn! I threw the boxes away. Shit-fire!
|
Karenina
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 09:11 PM
Response to Reply #9 |
|
:wtf: Please tell me you're pulling a... OH NEVER MIND!!! SOMEBODY CALL CALVIN!!!!!
|
DemoTex
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 09:32 PM
Response to Reply #13 |
16. I ain't pulling nothing tonight! Nothing! |
|
Edited on Wed Feb-02-05 09:32 PM by DemoTex
Between the Atenolol and Shiraz, there is nothing to pull. Believe me.
|
Karenina
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 11:48 PM
Response to Reply #16 |
|
OUTSOURCE THIS SHIT? GET ME CALVIN ON THE LINE. PERSONALLY. I MEAN NOW!
|
short bus president
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 09:04 PM
Response to Original message |
12. got a pocket knife? cut yer own fly. |
|
take the shorts off first, tho. ;-)
|
miss_kitty
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Feb-02-05 09:19 PM
Response to Reply #12 |
DU
AdBot (1000+ posts) |
Mon May 06th 2024, 05:25 AM
Response to Original message |