I DO hate kids

[HEyHEY]

Keep your sticky, smelly little monsters away from me or else I'll teach them bad words.

[Ravenseye]

1. Can You Baby Sit?

I plan to teach her to go up to people as soon as they can talk with a bottle of lotion and say "It puts the lotion on it's skin, and then it gives it back again"

[mike_c]

8. precioussssss....

eom

[yvr girl]

2. Isn't your sisters preggers

Are you going to be curmudgeonly uncle HEyHEY?

[HEyHEY]

4. PLEASE DO NOT REFER TO HER AS "PREGGERS"

My family is not white trash. ;-)

But yeah, she is.

I'm just busting balls, I like kids.

[Zuni]

9. Preggers is more a British slang than American

but I don't know what you Canadians say

[HEyHEY]

11. pregnant

[yvr girl]

14. She is PREGGERS and

she did the nasty with some guy.

[HEyHEY]

17. I don't care about that - cause they're married and whatever

They wanna do then is fine with me

[yvr girl]

26. Does that mean it doesn't bother you to think about your parents

doing the nasty either? Very evolved of you.

[Zuni]

32. How interesting

I say 'knocked up' or 'big with child'

[RevolutionaryActs]

3. I knew lots of bad words by the time I was 5, got to love an older brother

:evilgrin:

[fishwax]

5. if that doesn't help, give lectures about the facts of life/birds and bees

then parents will steer their kids clear of you.

[HEyHEY]

7. Especially if I use lots of street slang

[Rabrrrrrr]

13. And punctuate every point by thrusting your cigarette at them

and blowing the smoke in their faces, and in every pause, you take another slug from your orange juice glass full of warm gin.

[HEyHEY]

15. Oh, I can't WAIT to be an uncle!

[Rabrrrrrr]

25. It's a blast! Way better than being a father.

Cuz you can do your shit, and then send 'em back to your sister/brother to deal with the fallout.

"Hey, kids - wanna go learn how to smoke a cigar and swear like an Uzbekistan cabbie in NYC? Come on! Finish your beer, and let's go! Hey - waitaminute now, didn't I tell you had to blast all your firecrackers this morning? Come on, go blow it up NOW! I told you, no 'savesies'. Go blast it, then we'll fire up the cigars."

[CO Liberal]

6. They're OK If They're Properly Cooked

:-)

[Zuni]

10. mmmmm....kids

the other white meat

[Kadie]

12. My 4 year old says to me, "hey mom, I have a "f" word for you

We are in the front yard so I look around and make sure none of the neighbors are out. All I can think about is hubby and his language when he is working on projects around the house. I wonder if my son has expanded his vocabulary.

Cautiously I say, "oh yeah, what is your word."

I take a deep breath and wait for his reply.

Proudly he yells, "FIRE!"

whooosh......

I have to admit, my sons very first word was "zit". He said it with such feeling too. zit! zit! zit!

I had to stop using my favorite word.

[HeyManThatsCool]

16. How can you hate little people that are THIS CUTE???

[HEyHEY]

18. They contribute NOTHING to society

[rockymountaindem]

21. Someday *they* will be saying that about *you*.

Be nice to the younger generation.

[HeyManThatsCool]

23. I couldn't disagree more

Without kids there wouldnt be much point to life.

(I say this as a person who's life has changed 1,000% more than once because of a child- for the better)

[Rabrrrrrr]

27. Yep. Fuckin' parasites.

GET A JOB, LOSER BABY!!

[RoeBear]

20. It's natures defense mechanism

if they looked like this:


Who would get up at 3:00am to feed them?

[Spacemom]

19. I keep mine away from other people

By isolating them in a hermetically sealed bubble. :D

[HEyHEY]

22. Great keep em there!

[Rabrrrrrr]

28. Good! So I don't have to listen to their whining and mayhem and screaming

when I'm trying to eat dinner somewhere.

Thank God! All children should be put in bubbles.

[liberalhistorian]

24. Oh, bummer,

HEyHEY! And here I was hoping my son and I could use you to get Canadian citizenship and get the hell out of here before the shit really hits the fan! :evilgrin:

[shesemsmom]

29. I can relate. I have a kid and the older they get

the more trouble they can get into

[SheilaT]

30. Keep in mind,

those sticky, smelly little monsters will one day be changing your diapers in the nursing home.

[Shananigans]

31. Can I say...THE NEXT JANET RENO!

[PittPoliSci]

33. hahahaha

that's great :-)