Mensa Invitational

[HawkerHurricane]

Take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

Here are this year's winners:

1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

4. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

5. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

6. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

7. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

8. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

9. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

10. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. Glibido: All talk and no action.

14. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

18. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an a**hole.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

1. Those are great!

:thumbsup:

[Dogmudgeon]

2. Dreadful

Most of them are "let's-make-fun-of-stupid-people" gags for the self-impressed.

Plus, have you ever actually BEEN TO a Mensa function?

--p!

[HawkerHurricane]

3. Actually, I have.

It seemed to be a group of "we're very intellegent but can't handle normal society" type folks. 3 of them tried to convince me of the rationality behind scientology. "Self-Impressed" is a good way to describe them, though.

[megatherium]

4. The only rap against Mensa I've heard is that they tend to be

people of high intelligence but who aren't intellectuals (who haven't gotten college degrees and are not in the professions, etc). But that's not a real problem of course: Mensa is wonderful for people who don't fit in because they're intelligent, and who find the rest of the world boring or stultifying.

I've never been to a Mensa function. I think I might qualify for Mensa but I have good friends who are intelligent, and I teach at a university, so I haven't felt the need to seek them out.

[ArmchairActivist]

6. Actually, none of them take the form you suggest...

...with the possibile exception of 'Bozone'. I don't see how any of the other gags 'make fun of stupid people' really. Certainly not most.

Anyways, I've never been to a mensa function, nor do I know anyone in the club. Whether or not they are self-impressed is a mystery to me. :shrug:

I have seen them parodied, to good effect, on the Simpsons though.

[mark414]

5. sarchasm!

that's great

[Floogeldy]

7. I would have voted for "Arachnoleptic fit"

That's hilarious. I actually did that last night!

B-)