So what's the dumbest thing you have ever done while you were drunk?

[Mrs_Beastman]

Besides the usual things, like people.

Mr B and I had a rough day, so I'm sitting here rather looped.:beer: :beer: So, what things have you done?

I got on stage with a drag queen when drunk, which was brazen because she looked better(and sang better) than me

[coloradodem2005]

1. Got too friendly towards women who didn't know me very well.

Rolled around on a floor, broke down and cried. This is on three separate occasions. This is why I don't get drunk.

[Mrs_Beastman]

12. Oh, everyone has done that

don't feel too bad

[coloradodem2005]

26. Yeah. Well for the first incident I mentioned...

...they didn't want me back at the group.

[medeak]

31. wine taster

Notes From An Undisciplined Wine Taster
1994 Semillion, Ameberley Estate, Margaret River
Very nice! Solid, well-balanced flavors. Very flowery. Hints of oak. Quite drinkable now. Might not spit this one out.

McIlroy Cellars 1999 Aquarius Ranch Chardonnay
Lots going on here. Citrus. Vanilla. Butter. Very floral nose. Deep. Quite enjoyable. Can't stop drinking it.

Erazuriz 1994 Maule Valley Chardonnay
Young and buttery. I've got a buzz. Oak really compliments the fruit here. I'd like to compliment that blonde standing near the Pol Roger. Very drinkable. Might have another taste or two. Good stuff. Yum.

1998 Argyle Reserve Chardonnay
Ripe fruit. I need to slow down. Good nose. Maybe spit more. I think I'm done with whites. This is buttery. Yeah, I'm done with whites. Drinkable now or keep it for a few years. Slight headache. Nothing a few extra sips can't cure. Blondie is over by the 1998 Normans Old Vine Shiraz.

1998 Normans Old Vine Shiraz
Nose - Mulberry. Delightful. Major buzz going on. Hint of licorice. Man she's hot. Lots of Oak. Wonderful on the palate. Her too? Ha ha! Dark. Got some on my tie. Fruity. Gorgeous. Did I say oak? Spitting this one out would be a crime. Hit me up, dude.

2001 Benziger Cabernet Sauvignon, Stone Farm Vineyard
She's complex, I can tell. The wine is complex too I guess. Drinks real good right now. Yum. It's got nice tannins on my shirt. There's some blackberry or some berry in there. Whatever. I stepped on Robert Parker's foot. It's got berries. Very nuanced. Spills nicely. Will mature well. Great chest.

2003 Di Majo Norante Sangiovese
Hoooah! Man! Very full-bodied, and I'm not talking 'bout the wine. Ha ha. Deep color. Really like the nose. Hers too! Ha ha. I think I'm slurring. Moderate tannins, collar and cuff. Shouldn't drive. Definite hints of plum and stuff. Another glass of this beauty is in order. Maybe I'll ask this hottie if she always spits. Ha ha!

Chateau Pichon Longueville Baron 1989 Pauillac
Blackberry and plum fruit. You can drink this right from the bottle. Makes it hard to appreciate the bouquet because the little spout hole in the bottle is too small, see? The label is pretty and the bottle fits in my jacket because they're asking me to leave. Whatever! I don't care. Let go of me. Nice spices in there. It's really earthy and you can go to hell bitch I was not vulgar.

[skygazer]

2. Got into a footrace with a friend at 1 in the morning

On a broken sidewalk while wearing wooden clog type shoes. You can probably guess what happened - I went ass over teakettle. I leaped back to my feet, BEAT the guy then limped back to the bar.

About 2 weeks later, when I still couldn't walk, I realized I must have done more than sprain my ankle. Years later when my foot was x-rayed for something else, I found out that I'd broken it in 3 spots. It's still crooked (26 years later) and I can tell when it's going to rain.

[hippiechick]

3. Started an 'ask me anything' thread ....

:silly: :beer: :silly:

[NeoTraitors]

6. Running is only advisable when drunk if

its from the cops!:sarcasm:

My friend and I had a foot race while drunk. We were running down a trail in a park at night. He slammed into a 4 foot tall stationary grill. I lost my footing and took a superman dive along gravel.

There were no winners in that race!

[Mrs_Beastman]

8. Yes, Mr B advised against PUI

Posting under the Influence

It's too fun though

[yvr girl]

4. Got married

Well only in a nightmare, but it was scary.

[NNadir]

27. You aren't Brittany Spears are you?

[yellowcanine]

5. Peed on an electric fence?

Actually I wasn't drunk when I did that. But I was a 12 year old boy which is the next best thing.

[swag]

7. Good question

I hate to think of what was the dumbest.

[Mrs_Beastman]

11. I'm sure there is a Darwin award out there for the dumbest

[Burma Jones]

9. Put my head through a plaster wall

not drywall - real plaster from the 1930's.... Had to spend the night under observation at the local ER after that little stunt.

[Mrs_Beastman]

17. Your post made me cringe

[Burma Jones]

23. I haven't touched Canadian Club Since.........

and that was back in 1981.......

[Mrs_Beastman]

44. Well, I guess the experience was not wasted if you learned something

[LynneSin]

10. It would probably take a week to post everything

and believe me - I remember it all. Very very rare have I gotten so drunk that I don't remember everything

[havocmom]

15. LOL, My hero!

:loveya:

I have never managed to get drunk. Done plenty of dumb ass stunts sober though. I was the designated driver WAY before MADD ever formed up.

[kodi]

13. kept drinking

.

[alittlelark]

56. I'd say that's mine too.

[CanuckAmok]

14. I stole a whole bunch of WMDs and buried them in the Iraqi Desert.

At least I think it was the Iraqi Desert....

Now that I think of it, it might have been Arizona.

[On the Road]

16. Jumped the Tracks in Chinatown

After a Fordham reunion with my ex, we took the subway from the Bronx to Chinatown. I went down the wrong stairway and ended up on the wrong platform. I heard a train approaching the station. So I jumped down onto the tracks, leaped across the third rail of two sets of tracks, and scramble up on the other platform. My ex was horrified. In my state, I easily could have been fried to a crisp or run over.

[VOX]

18. Anything for comedy: Put my manhood into my wife's steam-curlers....

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW! :nuke:

As anethetized as I was, I still recoiled like a mongoose when the white-hot ball of steam came out of the container and engulfed my most sensitive area.

Managed to get second-degree burns. I made up some bullshit story for the doc. He just kept grinning and shaking his head.

Beyond dumb. :crazy:

I should add that this was many, many years ago....

[Vektor]

41. Wow! Talk about getting steamed!

That one takes the cake, I'd say! :-)

[VOX]

60. It was pretty damn lame. I've since cut back on my firewater consumption.

Guess it was something of a "wake-up steaming?" Or is that, "I wake up steaming?"

Sorry. :spank:

[Vektor]

71. I'm not sure...

but you could have scalded your wedding tackle.

[snowbear]

19. OMG.. I cut in on another couple dancing...

And I said to the guy..

:blush: :blush: :blush: :blush:

...oh geez.. before I tell you...

:blush: :blush: :blush: :blush:

I was completely shitfaced..

And my girlfriend's DARED me to say it....

:blush: :blush: :blush: :blush:

And I went up and said to this cute guy....

... "Why don't you ditch that bitch and dance with a real woman?"

And guess what..... :o :o :o :o

...... HE DID !!!!!!! :o :o

I couldn't believe it when they told me the next morning that I said that!

[Initech]

20. Almost got arrested

No joke. Last weekend, I was hanging out with my bro and some friends at UC San Diego when these douchebag (who were clearly on a power trip) cops approached us. They asked me to pour out a beer and I wasnt even drinking when I was on the campus.

I was about ten seconds away from filing a wrongful arrest report.

[faithnotgreed]

38. were glad youre here to tell us about it

[Initech]

69. Had things taken a different turn, I'd be on CNN right now...

Telling about how those asshole cops wrongfully arrested me.

[medeak]

21. went to brothel

took all my girlfriends to whorehouse for friend's bday. There were no men there (am female) and it was like a slumber party... lordy..we got the tour and saw all the toys. (will this close thread?)

[Donkeyboy75]

22. Ate three Big Macs in 3 min 45 sec.

Hey, it's harder than it sounds. As part of a competition. Dumb because

a) I HATE McD's. Did this back in 2001 and it's the last time I ate there.

b) I polished it off with a McFlurry. I can only imagine what my arteries were going through that night. :puke:

[Maddy McCall]

24. Won a Gross-Out contest with a bunch of guy friends.

Don't ask me what I did. I was dared to eat something, and, when I did, all of the guys went "DAMN!"

LOL

Oh, and I mooned a cop once.

[Blue_In_AK]

25. Started to pull my shirt off over my head in a bowling alley

(or so they tell me - I don't remember a thing).

[SarahB]

28. Let's see...

Made out with a Harvard law student I didn't know in Will Pitt's home office?

Hey, you asked. :shrug:

Actually, I start singing stupid songs at awkward moments mainly. I don't drink much most of the time and it's usually better that way.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

33. that's THE dumbest?

[SarahB]

37. Not so bad, huh?

;) (Made me DU's underground "bad girl" for awhile, but when it's said outloud, it's pretty silly to get too wound up over that.)

Well, that's because I can (sort of) at least carry a tune. :D

In truth, hurling isn't too sightly I either I suppose. :puke: Haven't done that for awhile though.

[RevCheesehead]

29. While puking my guts out, I flipped off a police car.

Fortunately, there was a group of people standing around me, so I think I wasn't noticed.

Ah, highschool... :)

[liberalhistorian]

30. Got it on with my then-fiance

without any "protection", which resulted in my becoming a single mother. Needless to say, I don't drink much at all anymore. Actually, I never drank that much to begin with, which was the problem. I had such low tolerance from rarely drinking that, when I did, it went right to my head.

[General Zod]

32. I puked on some guy who was taking a dump....

I was soooooo drunk, I just had to puke. I went for the 1st bathroom stall that I saw. Unfortunately, some guy was in there taking a dump.

He was not too happy. I avoided getting the crap beaten out of me thanks to my quick-thinking friend who drug me out of there before the guy could get his pants on. I don't remember much of anything else about that night, thank goodness.

[Redneck Socialist]

35. You win!

The fucking hysterical! :yourock:

[alittlelark]

58. OMG!!! That's hysterical!!

[Madrone]

72. ROTFLMAO

Congratulations. You just made me laugh out loud more loudly and for a longer duration than anything else I've read on the internet ever!



TOO FUNNY!!

[Zhade]

34. Let my friends take photos of me.

DIGITAL photos...which they quickly Photoshopped (and they're GOOD at it, dammit).

They still exist. *shudder*

[Redneck Socialist]

36. Other than the whole getting arrested thing...

hitting on my girl friend's roommate back in college. Yeah, that went over well. :eyes:

[Hardrada]

39. Walked around an entire city block in my jockey shorts

After drinking two bottles of Rhine wine. But there was no traffic and no other pedestrians and so I got back to my room unseen!!

[Pushed To The Left]

40. Made myself another rum and coke.....

...but this time instead of using "two fingers" of rum and filling the rest with Coke, I used "two fingers" of coke and filled the rest of the big glass with rum! I was 26 at the time. I was already pretty drunk at that point, which may have led to me to thinking that reversing the rum amount and coke amount was a good idea. Needless to say, I paid the price!! At one point, I was lying on my friend's couch, and let's just say it resembled a scene from the Exorcist!!

[dorktv]

42. I cannot say because I am an active politician but it was very dark

and very sad.

[BlondieK143]

43. Uhh, do you have all day?

Needless to say, I've got LOTS of stories. LOTS. Most of mine start off with "Well, I'd had a few drinks and I started feeling really flirty..." - you get the drift. When I'm drunk, I also tend to think that I'm 100 pounds and the most gorgeous woman on earth :rofl:

On the weekend of my 18th birthday, I took a trip to one of the colleges about 2 hours away from me. My friend is in a fraternity and he let me stay at the frat house so I didn't have to fork over cash for a hotel room. We had been at a keg party that night and this REALLY attractive guy from another fraternity asked me if I wanted to see HIS frat house. Needless to say, I was attracted to the guy and we were making out. He says "I'll be right back, wait right here." The next thing I know, the door flings open and there's about 15 of his brothers (including the friend I was staying with) standing in the hallway singing, "Happy Bir..." (silence) and there I am... in my bra and panties about to die! Needless to say, I STILL get shit about it.

The other time happened when I was visiting my marine friend where he's stationed. We had all been at a party off base and he and I weren't able to drive back. His buddy drives us back to base and we stop at the entrance (if you've ever been to one, you know that they check everyone's ID and they basically give you shit to make sure you're not driving drunk). The man asks us how we are and for our ID's. He asks if we've been drinking. My friend says one, the driver says no, and the other girl says a few. I look at the man (please remember - drunk here) and say, "Well hell! I guess that's why I'm so drunk, I had to make up for what they didn't drink." Cue puking. In the guy's brand new car. All over my friend. :( Not my finest moment.

[all.of.me]

45. slap the make on a gay co-worker

finally someone else said, 'get off him! he's gay!' it was pretty funny. i guess i was about 20, so that was about 30 years ago.

[Andy_Stephenson]

46. When I was in College

I spilled a full 12oz margarita into the lap of a girl named Lynne.

She was very gracious though and we have been friends ever since.

She sent me to my car and it was a good thing because as soon as I got there I heaved for about 15 minutes.

Ah...youth...it is wasted on the young.

[LynzM]

47. Kissed someone I shouldn't have

Got drunk with and kissed a guy I really shouldn't have. Not sure if I'll ever forgive myself for it. Ah well, we're all human, right? :shrug: :(

[BlondieK143]

48. Ugh.

I'm completely guilty of that one myself.

[LynzM]

49. Yeah....

I hate looking back and realizing that the alcohol was a huge contributor to that happening....

[Seabiscuit]

50. I posted on the DU Lounge

[AussieDave]

51. I couldn't get a friend's car into reverse

so I hopped the kerb and drove it down the sidewalk in a central business district. I guess I must've been pretty good because I didn't clean up any parking meters......

[fudge stripe cookays]

52. Learned Overpartiers Lesson #1- 1984

DO NOT MIX ALCOHOLS!!!!

First weekend alone at college; had met 1 roommate, and a couple friends of hers from orientation.

Went to guys tower of the big athlete's dorm. Had 5 Coors Lites, 2 red wine coolers, and about 2 fingers worth of Jack Daniels.

Ended up puking in the elevator. The janitors say my memory lives on!

FSC

[cestpaspossible]

53. I drove

[Mutley]

54. I peed on my friend's carpet.

Okay, here's the story. It was the first time I ever drank at a party (i wasn't even 21 yet) and I had 5 Rum and Cokes in little more than an hour. So, my friend had a spiral staircase, and I had to pee really bad. But there was no way in hell i was going up those stairs. So, I just squatted down where I stood and peed. :blush: Luckily my friend didn't care, and I cleaned it up the next morning.

[davsand]

55. This dovetails nicely with the "what's my felony?" game.

I have a theory that almost ALL of us have done something at one time or another that would classify as a felony. I have floated this discussion in several venues, and without fail, I'd say that 99% of people will admit to doing something REALLY stupid or else ILLEGAL when drunk.

For most people, it was about stuff like taking Dad's car without permission (grand theft-auto) or breaking into a buddy's apartment for an after hours party (B & E). HOWEVER, I was amazed at how many people had done some very serious stuff (on guy admitted stealing construction equipment and RACING it on the local highway!)

One guy admitted to setting fire to his ex-wife's parents' house...

Another very demure girl said she got drunk and just walked up to her cheating boy friend and kneed him in the groin...

I'd urge everyone to be careful about what you admit to-even IF it is on an online forum under an alias--but ask the question sometime at a party. You may be amazed at what people will tell you.

The only OTHER question that's any more fun is, "Where is the strangest location you ever chose to have sex in?"


Laura

[mark414]

57. drove

[Beware the Beast Man]

59. 4th of July, 1989. I was 15. Pissed to the gills on cheap vodka.

Jumped off of a single story building and sprained my ankle. Went home, passed out, and later painted my bedroom with my stomach contents. I was grounded for two weeks, and to this day I still have trouble with my ankle.

That and the time I kissed the ugliest girl on campus (don't worry folks, her personality was bad, too!);)

[Mrs_Beastman]

65. Didn't you have the worst hangover of your life

and your mom still made you go to a baseball game the next day?

[Beware the Beast Man]

66. Yes.

I hobbled around on crutches. And I could smell puke the whole time because, well, some of it came out of my nose. Ugh... :puke:

[TrogL]

61. Tried to fix a car that had run into a concrete pillar

The car was totalled. The driver was wandering around the road saying "huh...wha...where am I...is this Tuesday?" (no, it was Friday night). The horn was blaring and making an awful racket so I decided we'd better turn the horn off so I got the driver's attention (sort of) and got him to put his fingers in my ears to protect my hearing (I was a music major) while I went under the hood and started pulling wires.

Now that I know something about cars, I guess I managed to pull:

• all the spark plug wires
  
• the coil wire
  
• pretty much everything on the alternator
  
• the headlight wires
  
• the turn signal and running light wires
  
• the wire for the wiper motor
  
• the wire for the washer motor
  

Never did find the horn wire.

[TrogL]

62. Oh, and puked all over the...

• elevator
  
• pushbuttons to buzz the apartments
  
• potted plant
  
• parking lot
  
• front of the truck
  
• passenger seat of the truck
  
• crotch of my best suit
  
• bathroom
  
• bedroom floor
  
• bed
  
• kitchen floor
  

[TrogL]

63. Got lost

and ended up in a ravine (God only knows where, to this day I haven't found it again) and there was this party and I'd been drinking wine all night but all they had was beer so somebody gave me one and I didn't have an opener but somebody offered one but I said that's ok and broke the bottle open on a rock and drank it that way and cut my lip all to shit and bled all over the truck and drove for awhile and saw a motel and figured I'd better get off the road and rented a room and bled all over the bathroom and went to the front counter and bled all over that and got a bandaid and fell asleep and bled all over the pillow.

[fishnfla]

64. They claimed I was trying to burn down the backyard

but I knew what I was doing for cripes sake!

[DeAngel]

67. This was danged stupid...

I was SLOSHED. Could barely stand up. Took off my shirt in the middle of the room, took out my lighter, and starting just below my belly button, lit all my frontal hair on fire. Now, I'm mostly russian, so there's quite a bit of hair there... I looked like a dry Christmas Tree going up in flames. Needless to say, I walked away without a burn on my body (high tolerance for heat, I suppose).

[laylah]

68. Rode bare-breasted

on the top of the back seat of a convertable, into Telluride, Colorado during Bluegrass...1992. Last time I ever "danced" with Jose :evilgrin:

Jenn

[Nikia]

70. I lost a couple items of clothing

My bra and my flannel overshirt. I'd rather not talk about the rest of that evening.

[Piperay]

73. Lost my panties

on the beach :wow: woke up the next day and looked and looked for them then remembered :blush: I wonder if anyone ever came across them ... :rofl:

[giant_robot]

74. I've eaten peanuts off the floor (see poll below) n/t

[GalleryGod]

75. Funny Thread ! Sorry, I can't help.

Haven't been :puke: Drunk in over 30 years....but that's just me,folks !:rofl: :rofl: carry on !

[Magrittes Pipe]

76. Propositioned a stripper.

[huskerlaw]

77. Went to a gay bar

(I'm not), danced on top of a speaker with another girl, proceeded to fall off the speaker. Picked up a guy (yes, at a gay bar), offered to drive him home. Left with both the girl and the random guy...all three of us far too drunk to drive. Actually, random guy was too drunk to remember where he lived. He could remember the city name. Funny how that doesn't really help. We finally found a house that looked enough like his that he agreed he lived there and got out of my car. Drove home, swearing if I didn't die, I'd never do that again. Ah yes, good times.

[terrya]

78. Took off my shirt when I was dancing at a gay dance club.

I'm normally not the "take off your clothes at the bar" kind of guy.

[katinmn]

79. Caught a number of bats with my bare hands to show off how

quick I was.

Don't worry - it was catch and release.

That was during my "macho girl" phase.