Are co-ed baby showers an overreach?

[eyesroll]

A post on my other thread got me thinking...I was venting about being addressed on a coed shower invitation by my boyfriend's last name. It had nothing to do with the content or subtext of the shower itself; I was not concerned that I was being extorted for gifts by a stranger (as the BF would be giving a gift to his stepsister's baby anyway).

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=3618606&mesg_id=3618606

So...what say you?

[Richardo]

1. The babies can't tell the difference, but what if they slip and fall?

I'd say co-ed baby baths are safer. :)

[liontamer]

2. it had never occured to me that baby showers shouldn't be co-ed

does that mean the dad isn't supposed to be there either?

[Taverner]

3. We had a co-ed shower

It was great...its about the gifts anyway.

[Withywindle]

4. They better be!

If I gotta sit through those things, men better not get a free pass out! :P

[DS1]

5. If you're going to send that many men into a baby shower, you're going

to need one more thing.



Oh yea? And what would that be?



A good supply of Scotch

[Doctor_J]

14. and a Bears-Packers game on a big TV

that MIGHT make me go to a baby shower.

[jmm]

6. Most baby showers are an over reach

If can see if it's your first child but if you already have one then you should have the big stuff already. It's kind of like buying big wedding gifts for people who already live together and already have everything. I can see getting a little gift for someone in these circumstances but I ain't being guilted ito helping someone cash in.

Having said that the best baby showers I've been to have been co-ed. They felt more like a party than an extortion attempt.

[deutsey]

7. I have a very liberal friend with an absurd sense of humor

So me and some other friends came up with the idea of having a cross-dressing baby shower for her when she was pregnant.

The guys came in drag and the women came dressed as men, which gave my friend and her husband a good laugh. We didn't tell her the transvestite part beforehand, so it was big surprise for them.

A splendid time was had by all.

[Allenberg]

13. That's awesome.

Nice twist.

[pnb]

8. I've been wondering about this very question lately

With my wife and I's first child on the way. The way I see it, seeing as I am going to have to put everything together and rearrange the baby room by myself, the wife should suffer the baby shower.

That's just me of course. :)

[Bridget Burke]

9. Anyone can send invitations for anything to anyone.

And the invitee is free to accept an invitation or not.

"Overreaching" is possible whatever the gender of the invitees. Once upon a time, women stayed at home & dealt with womanly concerns while the men brought home the bacon. Things have changed.

Coed showers might reduce the competition among attendees. Who was in labor longer? Who required the most stitches? That's a good thing....

[eyesroll]

12. That's a good thing.

It would have been an overreach, I think, if I'd gotten invited to women-only baby shower for a woman I've never met simply due to my association with the mom-to-be's stepbrother.

If Jason and I were engaged/living together/married, then it would be different even if the stepsister and I hadn't met each other yet.

Co-ed showers (both baby and bridal) are generally more fun, at least in my experience, because then there also aren't as many insipid games. People (rightly) assume that most men aren't into "find the poopy in the diaper," and people (wrongly) assume that most women are. It's more party, less cooing over all things pastel.

[blondeatlast]

10. Baby showers should be the for the parents' closest, closest friends

and relatives. I feel the same about weddings.

For showers, if there's more than a dozen people, that's way too much.

I know I go way against the grain in my philosophy, and I am quite the social butterfly, but I just hate large gatherings.

There were NO people at my wedding shower--I didn't want one, there were 8 people at my wedding besides the groom (my first and only, I intend for it to remain that way), and there were 8 people at the baby shower, including my father and my husband.

I politely decline baby/wedding/what have you spectaculars, and my closest friends don't bother to invite me unless it's intimate.

[tigereye]

11. wedding shower for the ladies

baby shower for everyone. That's how mine were. But I don't see any reason why they can't just invite who they want to.

[Moriarty]

15. I'm a guy who's been invited to a few showers...

for family members. My dad and a couple other guys were invited not to give gifts, but to help loading the obnoxious number of gifts into the cars.

It wasn't so bad. We'd have our own table in some far off corner of the banquet hall, get a free meal, free beers and the chance to make fun of the whole situation. I can think of worse ways to spend an afternoon...