populistmom
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Nov-04-03 07:46 PM
Original message |
Another question for the men of DU? |
|
Yesterday someone posted a question to the men of DU about if they could get involved with a woman who was infertile for whatever reason. It got me thinking about the opposite issue. How many of you could you get seriously involved with a woman who had children?
|
Stone Cold
(161 posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Nov-04-03 07:52 PM
Response to Original message |
|
....it all depends upon the children, the number of children, and the attitude of the children. I tend to get very annoyed by kids, so probably not. But who knows. I've never been in that situation.
|
Gman
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Nov-04-03 07:55 PM
Response to Original message |
2. I married a woman who, at the time, had a 5 year old daughter |
|
She's now "our" daughter and she's 12. I told her from the beginning that they were a package.
I also have 2 kids 22 and 25 and a granddaughter that's 4. They are all "our" kids.
|
brainshrub
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Nov-04-03 07:56 PM
Response to Original message |
3. Now THIS is a good question |
|
I would say the age of the kids is more important than the number. When I was single, I wouldn't date a woman whose kids were under the age of 6.
Also, as a rule...I don't want to meet the kids until I have made some commitment to the relationship. Being a single mom is hard enough, I don't want to cause drama for her kids. Plus, if I was a kid I wouldn't want to see father-figures jump in & out of my life.
For the record, I have no kids. So I am certainly no expert on them.
|
ornotna
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Nov-04-03 07:56 PM
Response to Original message |
4. Kids are not a problem |
|
I love kids, I used to be one.
|
alwynsw
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Tue Nov-04-03 08:00 PM
Response to Original message |
5. I married a womann with 130 kids |
|
She taught school. After 8-9 hours of eighth-graders, boy did I look good! She's retired now and discovering my true appearance.
Actually, my ex- (the one who used mefor target practice after forgoing her meds) had 2 boys. I'd observe more closely before doing that again.
|
populistmom
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Nov-05-03 01:20 AM
Response to Original message |
youngred
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Nov-05-03 01:32 AM
Response to Original message |
|
I love kids, not a problem
|
maggrwaggr
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Nov-05-03 01:34 AM
Response to Original message |
8. I married a woman with a kid, now we have one of our own |
|
When I met her, I knew she had a kid, but she didn't want me to meet her kid until she knew things were serious.
It's great, because if you're serious about the future (and want to have kids, or assume that some day you'll have kids) you not only know that she's physically capable of having children, you also get to see what she's like as a mother.
When I was younger it would have scared me off I guess, but I was 38 when I met her.
I probably wouldn't have been open to it, but previously I dated a woman who was my age who had a 16 year old son. When I started seeing her I didn't know she had a son. I realized that I could learn a lot about her seeing her with her son. So after that I was open to seeing women with children.
Also: When you're in your mid thirties or so, like I was, and you want to date women who are at least 30, well, their clocks are either gonna be ticking LOUDLY or else they've decided they're probably not gonna have kids. So I thought I might be off the hook for the "pregnancy pressure" if I dated a woman who already had one.
Lo and behold we got pregnant anyway, quite by chance, and are now the proud and happy parents of an incredibly cute 1 year old boy.
Oh, and we got married somewhere in there, too.
|
Xithras
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
|
Wed Nov-05-03 01:56 AM
Response to Original message |
9. Only if there's no ex in the picture |
|
If the padre is dead or otherwise nonexistant, I'd be fine. Otherwise, I saw enough of the "play this parent against that parent" mindgames growing up to know that those situations are best avoided.
Of course, it's all theoretical anyway...I'm happily taken :)
|
DU
AdBot (1000+ posts) |
Wed May 08th 2024, 10:00 AM
Response to Original message |