How do you greet * when he shows up at your service relative's funeral?

[Tyler Durden]

Say you have a relative in the service, they are killed and Bush shows up at the funeral. Or if this is too close to home, you have any tragic event, like they did with fires in CA and Bush shows up to express sympathy.

What do you do or say to him (assume that he has brought his pet media along for a photo op).

Have fun with it. NOTE: I am assuming that only the spouse, child or mother of a dead serviceman could get away with #4, #5 or #7 and I am not advocating violence to the person of the pResident, only public and blatant Humiliation.

[Systematic Chaos]

1. Can't very well spit on him

That already got some schlub a life sentence, just for spitting on a police officer.

Just humiliating him to the point where he can't speak coherently (which wouldn't take much!) would be sufficient.

[Tyler Durden]

2. My personal fave:

Spit on his shoe and order him off the property.

There is no way spitting on his shoe could be contstued as assault, and when THAT happens, the photo will be the next Pulizer Prize winning cover of "TIME" even if his handlers hustle him away so he isn't present for the whole speech.

[Nailzberg]

3. It would still be assault.

So you might have to get a mouthful of chew and make it worth it, cause assaulting the POTUS is a pretty major crime.

[Tyler Durden]

6. Maybe I'd have to forgo the spit...

...On his shoes, it's assault? Seeing it's *, you're likely right.

I'll have to settle for waiting till the cameras are rolling and public humiliation, I guess. But it seems like if he got the Spouse/child/parent of a dead service person arrested for spitting on his shoe, the backlash would be horrific.

And maybe worth taking the chance.

[Nailzberg]

10. You could have good public support.

He would look like a real evil bastard for not turning his cheek and taking a slap, or pulling out a hankey and wiping the spit off. Having the mother or father of a slain service member arrested would look pretty dang bad. Although the law would be on his side, he'd look insensitive and weak. Public opinoin might keep you free.

[proud patriot]

4. I would humbly ask him to LEAVE

LEAVE JUST LEAVE HAVEN'T YOU DONE ENOUGH
LEAVE PLEASE GO AWAY LEAVE NOW .

[DuctapeFatwa]

5. You ignore him. The funeral is about your family, and your loved one

His presence there is inappropriate, but it would be even more inappropriate to acknowledge it or let it take anything from a private family occasion.

[Grassrooter]

17. Exactly, DuctapeFatwa! ...

I think it would be distasteful to 'make a scene' (i.e. spitting, etc) amidst a loved one's funeral. Completely ignoring him - not even acknowledging his presence - I think, would be the best form of action against * . It basically tells him, and everyone, that he's irrelevant and unimportant - that's the greatest insult, IMO.

[demnan]

7. This is a moot point

he doesn't have the cohones to show up for any funerals and you all have just listed a few reasons why.

[Nailzberg]

8. I don't think I'd be able to lull him into a false sense of security.

Even if we all pretended we were his supporters, I don't think he'd believe us.
-My activist Mother (who hates everything about him)
-My fire captain Father (who sees threatened loss of overtime, and overextension of emergancy personel without added federal funding)
-My gay uncles (the church married them, but it isn't recognized by the state)
-My former freeper aunt, who is against the war and Bush becuase my cousin joined Guard to pay for college, but can't go to college because she keeps getting prepped for activation, a few weeks here and there in Wisconsin getting ready, only to get sent back home. Since she's the only family member currently enlisted, we would be at her funeral most likely. I'm IRR, and likely would not be reactivated.)
-My policy wonk brother (worked on Schakowsky's campaign)
-And top it all off with the lesbian Unitarian minister.

I don't think we could pull off the hoax.

[hlthe2b]

9. Since he's not appeared at a single funeral.... I'd say

not much to worry about. this is a tough one, though, since part of me would want to credit him for having the nerve to show up. But since I know it would only be a self-serving political act, I'd have a lot of trouble ignoring him. I guess I'd have tgo make an impromptu eulogy (for all in attendence) that focused on the bravery of my lost one in stark contrast to his commander in chief... I'd be subtle but extremely pointed in my contrasts. Any press in the room would get the point...If there were other servicemen in attendence, I'd make sure that they got the accolades they deserve and my in tense hope that they would not also become pawns to political aims...

[Nailzberg]

11. "I'd like to thank Mr. Bush, for making this possible."

[elcondor]

14. That's perfect

Can't be taken for assault or a threat, but you'd still get your point across. I wouldn't start a scene at a family member's (or anyone else's) funeral, out of respect for him or her.

[wryter2000]

12. Why would he start showing up at the funerals now?

He hasn't done it so far.

[Tyler Durden]

13. Just blowing off steam.

Love the sig line by the way.

[It was not a pretzel]

15. Spit in his face

as it's probably the most insulting thing you can do to someone.

[lapislzi]

16. I'd look around in utter confusion...

and say loudly, "I THOUGHT YOU SAID THEY WERE SENDING THE PRESIDENT. WHERE'S PRESIDENT GORE?"

Then I would thank him politely and tell him that his services are not required.

[ET Awful]

18. While publicly denouncing him . . .

I'd hand the typical Flag from the flag-draped coffin to him and say "save this, the way you're going, we'll need more of them, and we can't afford to buy them anymore thanks to you."

[Tyler Durden]

19. Oh I DO like that one.

Very good. Too bad it will never happen as it would make an excellent quote for the press.

[arcane1]

20. what? No kick in the balls?

:shrug:

[qb]

21. Palm a packet of fake blood

then shake his hand and squeeze real hard.

[jmowreader]

22. This is a theoretical, right?

The only way he'd show up at your service relative's funeral is if you held it on the front stoop of his pig farm.