Memories! I just spoke with the brother of the first boy I ever loved...

[Radio_Lady]

It's been fifty years since this relationship started, in the summer of 1955.

Tomorrow, I will call my first boyfriend at his place of business in Florida (he was unable to take the call tonight because his wife is ill). He is now 69 years old.

His older brother, who is now 79 years old, spoke with me as if no time had gone by since 1955. We were chatting like school children! I met the younger brother by chance, at a cafeteria near my uncle's sporting goods store. It was love at first sight, as much as it could be, this young French-speaking immigrant from Brussels, Belgium, with his charming accent and curly brown hair -- and me.

We went together for about two years, through 11th and 12th grade in high school. (He did not complete school, much to the chagrin of my well-educated parents.) He took me to my high school prom. Then, I went off to college at the University of Miami, and he was inducted into the Army at Ft. Jackson.

In early 1957, I became infatuated with an older, married man, and sent my lover a "Dear John" letter.

I've always wanted to apologize.

Tomorrow, I will get that chance.

[Radio_Lady]

1. The story has many twists and turns, including the fact that --

both my husband of thirty-two years and my first boyfriend --

have the same "call" name of "AL"! (Ain't that a kick in the head!)

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. What a wonderful story, my dear Radio_Lady!

How many of us get to go back 50 years to take care of "unfinished" business?

I do hope he remembers...Won't you let us know?

Thanks for the incredible story! :pals:

I'm always in the mood for this sort of story!

[XNASA]

3. I had a similar, though toned-down encounter today too.

Had some plumbing problems.

Called my old buddy, who owns a plumbing business, to send someone over.

The guy he sent over to fix my sink was also an old friend, to my surprise. While he was at my house, he took a phone call, from my first love's little sister.

Small world, I guess.

Oh and....good luck with that.

[Radio_Lady]

15. Did you get to speak with your first love after that?

Curious minds want to know.

[XNASA]

17. It was her sister that was on the phone, not her.

But I speak with my first once and awhile. I'm on her monthly e-mail distribution list that is a kind of social calendar for a lot of old, mutual friends. So we occasionally show up at some of the same events.

We had known each other since way before we ever fell in love having met in grade school. But we didn't fall in love until we were in our early 20's. So we've been friends, a long time.

[Swede]

4. What a great story.

Thanks for posting this. Please fill us in on what happens next.

[Radio_Lady]

8. If you're into numerology, here are some interesting details...

I don't believe in it, but here goes:

My first boyfriend 1955 - 1957 was born on February 4, 1936.

My second male friend from 1957 and for a very long time after that was born on -- you guessed it -- February 4. In case he ever reads this, I won't tell you the year.

When my daughter was born in 1969 (fathered by my ex-husband if you're doing the math), I wrote in her baby book as much information as I could about her great grandparents. My mother's father (my grandfather) turned out to be born on (you guessed it again!) February 4.

I somehow believed this was some kind of a sign, so when my present husband asked me to marry him, I suggested we marry on 02/04/73 -- which was just a week after he asked me because I was pretty wary. We married in the rabbi's study, with our five children and two witnesses in attendance.

It would be very romantic to say that "everyone lived happily ever after," but that would not be the truth. One thing was that we kept running into bad weather and snowstorms that curtailed or cancelled our anniversary celebrations when we lived in Boston. So we switched our celebrations to late April, around my husband's father's birthday (and there was less chance for bad weather...)

Now that we're in Portland, Oregon, February 4th has new significance. First of all, it rarely snows here. Secondly, we tend to travel during that period to warmer and sunnier places.

Next year, we'll be in Arizona and Nevada over that date. Maybe I should play the numbers 02-04-73 on some gaming tables to see if the luck is TRUE!!

Making peace the priority,

Radio Lady

[knowbody0]

11. my grandmother was born on and died on Feb 4.

love your story, Radio Lady. you should play those numbers!

[In_The_Wind]

5. That's so very sweet.

There must be something in the air these days because I've bought a card to send to my old boyfriend, a very special man who is also in Florida.

When we went our separate ways back in 1979 he left a letter for me asking that we meet again in 20 years. I'm a little overdue but perhaps it'll surprise him even more if I send him a copy of that old letter with the card.


good luck tomorrow Radio Lady

[all.of.me]

6. what a sweet story!

good luck tomorrow!

[Radio_Lady]

12. Reality has just set in. I'll have to get up by 7AM Pacific Time to make

that call to the East Coast (10AM Eastern Time)! Better get some rest. My heart is beating so fast just thinking about it.

[all.of.me]

13. wow, i hope you CAN sleep!

[jody]

7. We are soul mates in time. It's so nice to have an opportunity to

talk with others that have made a lasting impression on one's life.

Sleep peacefully with wonderful dreams of what might have been.

:pals:

[Radio_Lady]

9. Thank you, Jody -- you are so kind. I regret the brittleness of youth

which allowed me to send this sweet young man a letter signed "Take care" instead of "Love" and to do this while he was far away from home in Basic Training.

I still think of him when I speak the little bit of French that I do, or hear one of the older French songs from the 1950s and 60s, or one of the bands of the time. It should be interesting to see what he recalls and how he receives my apology.

Yes, we all travel on this time continuum together -- reaching out seems to be important to me at this time of my life and this summer in particular -- the summation phase of fifty years, I guess. Switchboard.com makes it possible to trace people, although I did pay $8.01 for an Intelius search (giving me a disconnected telephone number for my trouble!).

Last night, I also called a woman who married one of my friends from work in the 1950s. Regrettably, she and her husband lost a young son at age 15 1/2, when he was hit by a car driven by a drunken person.

We all used to play bridge together when we lived in New York and New Jersey, and I lost track of this couple years ago. Her husband died a few months after open heart surgery in 1985. He was apparently consumed by guilt at the death of their son. The good news is that a daughter, age now 30, survives. My friend never remarried, and now works in aids research.

I really hope to see this woman again. She stated she is coming to Portland to visit another friend, and it would be great to visit with her and give her a big hug!

Good night, my Internet friends.

Making peace a priority,

Radio Lady

[Left Is Write]

10. Wow...what a story.

I hope you will enjoy the conversation.

[Radio_Lady]

14. UPDATE: It is morning, now, and his business number is ringing...

No one has answered at 10 AM Eastern Time.

Be still my heart. I did sleep well with pleasant dreams.

Back to the real world. It's going to be in the high 90s, maybe even 100 degrees here in Portland.

I have to go pick up my grandchildren and take them to a pool.

I won't be able to call until tomorrow morning :-(

I can't get the French lyrics for "Autumn Leaves" out of my mind. It was "our song" --

AUTUMN LEAVES

(French lyrics by Jacques Prévert,
English lyrics by Johnny Mercer,
Music by Joseph Kosma)

(French)

C’est une chanson, qui nous ressemble
Toi tu m’aimais et je t’aimais
Nous vivions tous, les deux ensemble
Toi que m’aimais moi qui t’aimais
Mais la vie sépare ceux qui s’aiment
Tout doucement sans faire de bruit
Et la mer efface sur le sable les pas des amants désunis

(English)

The falling leaves drift by the window
The autumn leaves of red and gold
I see your lips, the summer kisses
The sun-burned hands I used to hold

Since you went away the days grow long
And soon I’ll hear old winter’s song
But I miss you most of all my darling
When autumn leaves start to fall

(To be continued...)

[Left Is Write]

16. Oh, I can just imagine your heart pounding with every ring.

I hope you can get a hold of him soon.

[Radio_Lady]

18. UPDATE #2 -- We spoke today at 1:30 PM. It was truly delightful to hear

his voice after all these years. He even remembered the name of the street where I lived all those many years ago. This is shared history which no one else in our lives can know. (My husband was just a tiny bit jealous, I think. He said he wanted to look up some of his old girlfriends. I told him I'd help, but remember that women change their names at marriage, which often makes things more difficult.)

Perhaps tomorrow we will get to speak again. I'll be at the radio station at 7 AM Pacific Time and will try before I record my show at 8 AM.

Make peace the priority,

Radio Lady

[Blue_In_AK]

19. Radio Lady, good luck with that...

I told you a couple of weeks ago what happened when I reunited with my first love after 37 years apart. The emotions were overwhelmingly powerful. We both ended up divorcing our long-time spouses and have now been married ourselves for two years, and have never been happier.

This is just a warning to expect the unexpected.

[Radio_Lady]

21. Blue_In_AK, I know what you mean... my knees were jelly during

the conversation! But I have a wonderful marriage with a man who has stood by me for 33 years. I am not looking to re-ignite any passion; just to put some closure on some arrogant and thoughtless behavior so long ago.

I wish it were possible to apologize to several others in my life whom I have wronged; regrettably, some are now deceased and at least one other refused to speak with me. It is not possible to make peace with everyone, even if you want to.

Be happy with your first love. It's an exceptional story with a happy ending for you!

Warm regards,

Radio Lady

[Radio_Lady]

20. UPDATE #3 -- Saturday, August 6 -- The Finale

Thanks for keeping this thread alive!

I had a wonderful conversation with my "first love" today in which I apologized for my abhorrent behavior in 1957. It felt so good to hear him say, "What do you have to apologize for?" We discussed the fact that we were both young and impressionable. He was very sweet and charming -- and he asked me if I still have brown hair! (I said that I do, but I need a little assistance from the tint bottle!)

He has been married only once, in 1968, to a woman with whom he had two children, a boy and a girl (like I have). He is also a brand new grandfather! I think I'll send some little gift for the baby.

We vowed to keep in touch by mail and telephone (he does not use the Internet very much, he said...) and in 2006, when my high school reunion takes place in Florida, I'd love to introduce him to my husband of 32 years.

Do you have any memories to add?

Making peace a priority,

Radio Lady

[Radio_Lady]

22. I just sent him the prom picture we took in 1956. Wanna see it???

[AVulgarianHue]

23. What wonderful photographs!

has happy feel-good qualities.

[Radio_Lady]

26. We danced that night away at the Fontainebleau Hotel in Miami Beach

My mother wanted me home at 2 AM but we stayed out until dawn.

Ah, the excesses of youth!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

24. I have been following your story, my dear Radio_Lady....

And I want to tell you that I think you are courageous to pursue it through to this wonderful ending....

The pic is terrific! Happy times for you both...Both now and in the future...

[Radio_Lady]

25. Thanks, Peggy. I'm going to send a little gift to his new grandson.

The little boy is just four weeks old. I'm sending a crib bear with a built-in music box that plays "Brahms Lullabye" and the blue crib quilt that my grandson used, decorated with sweet little bears. It's pretty light weight and perfect for Florida's winters.

Then, tomorrow, I'm going to get a gift certificate for some nice store in Miami so the couple can use it for something they want and/or need.

Pay it forward.

Warm regards,

Radio Lady

[Radio_Lady]

27. With apologies to Willie Nelson and Julio Iglesias...

"To all the boys I've loved before
Who travelled in and out my door
I'm glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the boys I've loved before

To all the boys I once caressed
And may I say I've held the best
For helping me to grow
I owe a lot I know
To all the boys I've loved before...

To all the boys who shared my life
Who now are husbands to some other wives
I'm glad they came along
I dedicate this song
To all the boys I've loved before

To all the boys who cared for me
Who filled my nights with ecstasy
They live within my heart
I'll always be a part
Of all the boys I've loved before

The winds of change are always blowing
And every time I try to stay
The winds of change continue blowing
And they just carry me away

To all the boys we've loved before
Who travelled in and out our doors
We're glad they came along
We dedicate this song
To all the boys we've loved before"

To: Monty (who committed suicide in my senior year of high school), Albert, Chuck, David, Richard, Peter, Allen, Stan, Steven, Marty, Larry, Len, Paul, and so many I have now forgotten.