datasuspect
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Thu Aug-11-05 10:13 PM
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"what do you do?" within 2 seconds of meeting you, do you find this a bit intrusive?
i always say that i am independently wealthy.
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lpbk2713
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:12 AM
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The unspoken message is "Are you important enough to be taking up my time?" I usually find a way to find someone else to talk to.
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Orsino
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Fri Aug-12-05 02:03 PM
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I never read that into the question. It seems to me to be a perfect conversation opener with someone you don't know well. Requesting a bit of not-very-personal information doesn't seem intrusive, can lead to further chat--inconsequential or not--and it's easy to lie if one doesn't really wish to answer.
I don't believe in telling people what they can and can't take offense at, but I'm not understanding your position.
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WeRQ4U
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:14 AM
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2. It is a rather odd question. |
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Kind of like when people ask my wife if she's breast feeding our little boy. THat always strikes me as rather intimate for a stranger to inquire about.
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Floogeldy
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:19 AM
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3. I always say: "I just lay there." |
Jamastiene
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:39 AM
Response to Reply #3 |
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:rofl: Good one. I have told people that I am a full time bum before just to get a reaction, but I like your's better...
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ghostsofgiants
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:22 AM
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4. You have to make up something really outlandish to tell them... |
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"Well I'm the tooth fairy, but I also moonlight as Santa Claus once a year." Something like that.
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AllieB
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:25 AM
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5. It's a way people try to get a sense of who you are |
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and unfortunately, people in this country define others by their jobs and possessions.
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Spider Jerusalem
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:29 AM
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6. Intrusive and annoying... |
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I often want to say I'm a professional Jesus impersonator, available to turn wine into urine (sorry, haven't gotten the water into wine thing down) at their next wedding or bar mitzvah for a reasonable fee...
Or, depending on my mood, I'll say "I read, write prose and poetry, appreciate music, take photographs, sketch, play chess..." et cetera. Which probably isn't what they wanted to know, but then they shouldn't have asked.
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sleipnir
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:34 AM
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7. "I do whatever the voices tell me." |
enigmatic
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:13 AM
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I'm saving that for the next time!
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u4ic
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Fri Aug-12-05 03:00 AM
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datasuspect
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:24 AM
Response to Reply #7 |
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do you mind if i borrow that one?
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knowbody0
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:45 AM
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Spock_is_Skeptical
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:48 AM
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9. Yes, it can be intrusive. |
mykpart
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:06 AM
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10. That's not as bad as when they ask what your husband does. |
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As if they already know you couldn't possibly be very important on your own.
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datasuspect
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:24 AM
Response to Reply #10 |
Lydia Leftcoast
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:07 AM
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11. I find it unimaginative |
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Edited on Fri Aug-12-05 01:09 AM by Lydia Leftcoast
The answer in my case always leads to the same conversation, so I almost feel as if I should record the routine and play a tape whenever the subject comes up.
I've always enjoyed meeting people who take a long time to get around to that question.
When I was in grad school, the equivalent question was, "What department are you in?"
I always preferred the men who took hours or even days to get around to that question.
BTW, during my period of unemployment in the 1980s, I joined a church choir, and when I was introduced, the director asked, "And what do you do?" And I answered, "Nothing," which got a round of applause from the choir.
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eauclaireliberal
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:46 AM
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13. RE: "when people ask you:" |
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"what do you do?"
"I insert suppositories, withdraw blood for lab testing with really large needles, take temps where it's easiest to get...anything else? No? Not to worry, this won't hurt a bit."
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eauclaireliberal
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Fri Aug-12-05 11:48 AM
Response to Reply #13 |
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Edited on Fri Aug-12-05 11:49 AM by eauclaireliberal
n/t
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yurbud
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Fri Aug-12-05 03:10 AM
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15. If the question bothers you, it needs a follow up--WHY do you do it then? |
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a lot of people work to live instead of live to work.
if you don't give a shit about your job and its something to pay the bills, say so.
Or say what your real passion is, like collecting pygmy goat porn.
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NMMNG
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Fri Aug-12-05 03:53 AM
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17. You collect pygmy goat porn? |
yurbud
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:46 PM
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50. It helps me understand the hillbilly right |
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Hillbilly Hitler art:
Blog:
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datasuspect
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:26 AM
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but i prefer some idle chit chat before someone starts "qualifying" me.
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Dastard Stepchild
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Fri Aug-12-05 03:13 AM
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16. Meh..... people never know how to get the conversation started... |
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This seems to be a tried and true method. Since I love what I do, I never mind answering the question, but I suppose I would be of a different mind if I was feeling any sense of dissatisfaction about my life.
Not that I am suggesting you feel that way. :)
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datasuspect
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:29 AM
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26. i am actually learning |
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that happiness isn't contingent upon what you do, where you live, or any other externality.
it's what's between your ears.
i'm convinced a person could be happy shovelling shit if they have the right attitude towards life.
often, the self-important types who feel tremendous insecurity often want to "size you up" during a conversation.
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Dastard Stepchild
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Fri Aug-12-05 11:11 AM
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43. Oh... I suppose it very well could be a "size you up" thing... |
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I tend to be somewhat oblivious to that - years of being teased and tormented as a child keeps me from getting overly flustered when people try to "put me in my place." But, I can see your point - the question can be used for good or for evil.
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fleabert
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Fri Aug-12-05 04:11 AM
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18. I like to say, "When, exactly?" |
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and yes, it's intrusive. and it's not at all what I am all about. I am more interested in what people believe in, rather than what they make money doing.
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khashka
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Fri Aug-12-05 04:15 AM
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19. Whatever I can get away with n/t |
Omphaloskepsis
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Fri Aug-12-05 04:25 AM
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20. I usually tell them.. |
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"My family is doing fine." And I fucking hate it when people ask me that. But that is what I hear 95% of the time when I see someone I haven't seen in a few years. My income doesn't define me..
If I get a few drinks in me. I tell them I touch their kids while they are at work. That approach usually doesn't end well. But, it makes me giggle.
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WannaJumpMyScooter
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Fri Aug-12-05 04:27 AM
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21. Very intrusive and rude. |
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I usually say, well I don't talk to social climbing shits like you if I am in a bad mood, which if I am somewhere that question is asked, I most likely am.
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bliss_eternal
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Fri Aug-12-05 04:27 AM
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22. I hate that question--but 'how old are you' always pisses me off |
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more!
My recent response to the age thing is,"age is only relevant when discussing wine or cheese..."
It either gets a laugh, a quizzical look, or a comment about how accurate the statement truly is.
A friend of mine used to say (to the age query),"is it your manners or your business? In other words, do bad manners make you ask me my age or is it any of your business?"
I LOVE that one!
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datasuspect
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:30 AM
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Jamastiene
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Fri Aug-12-05 07:37 AM
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28. I tell them I sleep, eat, go to the bathroom |
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and put my pants on one leg at the time just like anybody else does. Yes, I find it utterly intrusive and shallow. Like what something has to do for a living is ALL that defines a person.
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rbnyc
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:03 AM
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30. It depends on the context. |
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If it's at a party or someplace where people are trying to get to know one another, I don't see the problem. You can learn a lot about a person by what they do.
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Shell Beau
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:16 AM
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31. I guess it could be considered intrusive, |
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but it also could be someone just trying to get a better understanding of who you are. I don't typically find it to be nosy. But it does sound that way now that you mention it.
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Misunderestimator
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:17 AM
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32. What do you do, Shell? |
Shell Beau
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:33 AM
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34. As someone else said earlier, I am independently wealthy! |
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Edited on Fri Aug-12-05 08:33 AM by Shell Beau
Yeah right, I wish! I really am in the oil and gas business, and it sucks b/c the people here have royalty interests and when the cost of oil and gas goes up, the get off all over themselves while people like you and me suffer.
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Misunderestimator
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:45 AM
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35. You're in the oil and gas business? |
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But.... what do you DO in the oil and gas business?
(And I'm really just kidding in asking this, you know.)
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Shell Beau
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:03 AM
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36. I know you're teasing. But it does suck b/c everyone here |
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that gets the royalty interest off of all our oil wells is ecstatic. While people like you and me have to pay an arm and a leg to fill our cars up. Oh well! I have a job and get paid well, I can't complain. And BTW, what is it that YOU do? }(
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Misunderestimator
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:06 AM
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37. I own an oil and gas company... we're doing great right now... |
Shell Beau
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:11 AM
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38. Yeah, I bet y'all are. Can I have some royalties in some of your wells? |
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Just enough to bring in an extra 5 grand a month. That isn't too much to ask is it? I know some of the MEN around here (the men really prosper in this business :eyes:) can bring in $50,000-$250,000 a month on their royalties.
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Misunderestimator
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:27 AM
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39. You betcha... just PM me with your bank info so I can wire it. |
Shell Beau
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:45 AM
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40. Wow! Is it that easy! Okay, I will be sure to give you my account number! |
lukasahero
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:02 PM
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47. Be sure to include your SSN and PIN. ;) eom |
movie_girl99
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:33 AM
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33. i don't like it when people ask but |
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i think it's just a way of making small talk. It doesn't offend me but it does bug me a bit.
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lildreamer316
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:47 AM
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41. Very interesting for me |
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because they really don't want the answer. I dread it because of all the inevitable questions and immediate judgement that usually follow.
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DeposeTheBoyKing
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Fri Aug-12-05 09:49 AM
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42. You should have my life |
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I'm married to a Pakistani who grew up in Karachi and whose native language is Urdu. Whenever I meet one of his friends (and he has a seemingly endless supply!), the wife invariably asks me the following questions:
1. Do you have children? 2. How long have you been married? (and then a pause to consider why we have no children when we've been married 10 years) 3. Have you learned to speak Urdu? 4. Have you learned to cook Pakistani dishes?
I get very sick of it. When I'm in a group of these women, the talk is ALL about recipes and their kids. Even if they're educated, that's the main topic of conversation. Because I have no kids and don't cook 10 types of biryani, I have nothing to say. I always wish I could go to the mens' sitting area and discuss politics and sports!
End of rant.
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Shakespeare
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Fri Aug-12-05 11:24 AM
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44. Then don't EVER move to L.A. n/t |
eauclaireliberal
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Fri Aug-12-05 11:50 AM
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46. Hey! Here's a good one! |
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See if you can guess which movie this is from:
"So what are you doing with your life now, Martin?"
"I'm a professional killer."
"Oh, good for you. That's a growth industry."
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lukasahero
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #46 |
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Grosse Point Blank, right? Excellent movie.
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eauclaireliberal
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Fri Aug-12-05 08:53 PM
Response to Reply #48 |
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I love that flick. Funny as hell.
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Ron Mexico
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Fri Aug-12-05 12:07 PM
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And technically, that's correct: I won about $1400 some years ago. Not a cent before or since, but in the strictest of technical terms I'm telling the truth.
You'd be amazed at how transparent and "friendly" some of these assholes get when I say that.
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scarlet_owl
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:52 PM
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51. A lady asked me that one time upon meeting me for the first time. |
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I answered honestly. I told her I was a homemaker. She gave me a dirty look and said "Well I guess that means your husband makes a good living." I wanted to smack her. We're dirt poor because I'm on disability and my husband makes a crappy wage. What I really love are the people who just have to ask why I'm on disability. But that's a whole other can of worms.
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Lowell
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Fri Aug-12-05 01:57 PM
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52. Special Investigator for the IRS |
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usually shuts them up. I'm not of course, but by time I get around to straightening them out they are gone.
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bridgit
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Fri Aug-12-05 02:05 PM
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54. i tell them i work for vandelay industries... |
Syncronaut Seven
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Fri Aug-12-05 11:37 PM
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56. I almost invariably tell them drug dealer or terrorist |
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But then I explain it's really a cover for CIA. Is that illegal?
Watch them stuff that in the little box they had prepared for me. :evilgrin:
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