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Yes, I apologized to mzmolly for my part in the primary wars.

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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 05:43 PM
Original message
Yes, I apologized to mzmolly for my part in the primary wars.
She apologized back to me, too.

And I'd like to go further and even extend that apology to other Dean supporters during 2004 with whom I tangled. As far as I can tell, everyone with whom I battled has let by-gones be by-gones. But, just in case, I want to say that I put any ill feelings about the primaries behind me, and I hope that others have, too.

I'll admit it. I said some nasty things to and about the most vocal Dean supporters. And I know that they said some nasty things about and to me. I let it go. Or I apologized to those who I was the nastiest to. Mzmolly included.

Does that make me a participant in phoney smarminess? I don't think so. Does it make me two-faced? Maybe in the past, but not now, because I am admitting my past nastiness and trying to make amends, and I am appreciative of people who have made amends to me.

Since the Bev-become-Andy thread in GD has spiraled into some snarky posts in the lounge, I just want to clear up any questions anyone might have for me, here and now.

If me being nice to former adversaries makes people puke, so be it. I'll admit, I can be a low-down person with insults and such when I am pissed off.

But every day at DU, someone inspires me to be a better person than I am. That doesn't mean that I won't disagree with people any more. That doesn't mean that I won't adamantly defend my position. It just means that I am trying to put the past behind me and to find new ways to disagree with people, without resorting to attacks and back-biting.

Indeed, if anyone has a disagreement with me that needs tending to, why not PM me instead of passive-aggressively starting a thread about me, but not naming me, in the Lounge?

We can all be better people. Thank you to the DUers who inspired that in me. Smarmy as it may be.
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 05:51 PM
Response to Original message
1. You are a good woman Maddy.
It is funny. Just the other week I swallowed a long time bad feeling about another poster. I found that she and I were posting some very similar things in a group and felt much the same about many other things. I PMed her. I told her that I had had her on ignore for a long time and that she made me angrier than anyone has in my life during the primaries. We both laughed, hugged and said nice things to each other. I have not "talked" to her much since then but I can say that it made me feel wonderful and I think these kinds of things almost always do. You and I never tangled but if we had a post like this one would certainly make me feel very good about you. It takes a big person to publically apologize ot attempt to clear the air like you just have, a very big person with a big heart. I will forever be sad that I did not have the chance to meet you at Camp Casey to give you this great big :hug:

I did not see the thread and I will not look for it but I got your back (not that you have ever needed it).
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 05:58 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. Thanks, Muse.
The day will come when we meet in person. And I look forward to that day.

Add your name to that list of people who inspire me.

:hug:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:50 AM
Response to Reply #3
31. Funny
The exact same subject line immediately occurred to me: "You're a good woman, Maddy McCall." And I don't even know what the backstory is. I just know that you're a good person. I also know that you're likely right far more often than wrong and, when you think you might've been off base (or, indeed, when you actually were) you say so loud and clear. The spiritnibblers hate that... :-)

:hug:

Welcome back from the trenches.

By the way, I think I might start that message over again...either that or I'll get it bound for you, all 433 pages of it, and send it via post. :D
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:20 PM
Response to Reply #31
43. Well, during the primaries, I was a good woman...
as in Lizzie Borden-good. I wielded an axe with much precision...well, I got a little sloppy sometimes.


Yeah, what should have been political discourse turned into personal attacks...from and to my side. I think most people have let it go, but just in case, I wanted to make things ok with anyone I know I personally attacked, who might still hold grudges.


That's my nature. Smarmy as it may be. :hug:
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no name no slogan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 05:56 PM
Response to Original message
2. Primaries, Schmimaries....
I was a hardcore Kucinich supporter, and some of my best friends are Dean supporters. I beat the holy hell out of them two springs ago, and they did the same thing to me. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

And now we're all pals, and involved in the same organizations, too, because we basically agree on 99.99% of things anyway!

Politics is politics, and we have to learn to leave it at that. Most people are basically decent human beings, and truly want to do what's right. That's one thing that Dennis Kucinich taught me, and one thing I have kept at the forefront of my continuing efforts to make this planet a better place.

:toast:



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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:00 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. Well, some of my attacks were personal and very ugly.
I didn't just stick to candidate positions, I attacked frequently and with fury.

Now I realize how stupid it all was, and I've let it go and am asking others to.

But I will not be labeled two-faced.

A wise man knows when to change his mind; a fool never does.

:hug:
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eridani Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 11:30 PM
Response to Reply #2
28. I'm finding that to be very true in local politics as well
I've gotten really obsessed with getting more progressives running for everything, and those Kucinich and Dean people who decided to stick with the Dems are finding a great deal of things in common with issues. The process of getting to know people who were on a different side in the primaries is a lot like strange cats meeting--the paw under the door, the sniffing of the air, the tentative rapproachment, and then curling up in front of the fire together.
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:05 PM
Response to Original message
5. I think if you go back and look in ER&D forum Maddy, you and
I have tangled. We may be adversaries in debates, we may have had difference of opinions, but we have common goals and beliefs and I know from your posts and your passion that you genuinely care.

I appreciate all on DU, even the mean ones I suppose. They help me keep my feet planted on the ground and help me to remember the evil that is around us. Too safe on DU is not wise, it allows you to let your guard down and them you are vulnerable to their games and attacks. You are vulnerable to the hurt they intend to cause.

It's sad, but DU is a community and there are always good and evil in the community. Sometimes you can ignore the evil and sometimes you run smack into it.

I am grateful for people like you and mzmolly and Eloriel, folks that I know I have debated in the past, but I also know that y'all's hearts are in the right place and y'all's goals are for the good. Folks like you all give me hope and encourage me to keep trying.

:grouphug:

Thanks Maddy - thanks for caring so damned much! :hug:



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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:09 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. You know, I had thought that we probably had.
But I didn't want to mention it, hoping that maybe you had forgotten. :blush:

I hope that DU never sees the ill sentiments that those primary wars bred. I hope we can find a way to debate next time without it getting so ugly.

You do know, however, that you are on that list of people who inspire me. A true generous, kind soul you are.

:hug:
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:18 PM
Response to Reply #6
9. Heck - differences of opinions are expected on message boards.
Especially if it involves liberals, progressives and members of the democratic party. We will never see eye to eye on everything, if we did just think how boring that would be, we would have to change our name to the GOP or fundies or xitians.

None of our debates were contemptuous, Maddy. They were full of passion, but not meanness. I have seen vile, evil, meanness today and it breaks my heart. I have had the freepers nip at my heels and it hurt less, it was expected of them. But for DUers to succumb to the evil, well that is very sad indeed.

You inspired me from the get go - I came here and read your posts and observed your knowledge and passion and thought, damn, that MS lady isn't gonna shame this MS lady. So I brushed up on a lot of subjects just so I could hold my own in those debates.
:hug: :loveya:

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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:20 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. Have I told you lately that you fucking rock?
Have I? Well? Have I?

Well, YOU FUCKING ROCK!

:yourock: :loveya: :hug:
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merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:23 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. The sentiments is mutual!
:yourock:

Damn it - I have to get out of the office - I want some ham too!


:hug: :loveya:

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jonnyblitz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
7. i was a Dean supporter by default because it appeared to me
there was a pile on against Dean supporters when supporters of "other" candidates were just (and still are) as "intense" about their candidate as Dean supporters were. I wasn't excited about any of the candidates since i will always be waaay to the left of any DEM but I played a Dean supporter on DU during the primaries.

I don't really remember you as being a virulent anti-Dean person, even under your other screenname. I can picture you being a relentless snark tho..hehe..:hi:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:18 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. Oh, I fully admit it. I was a relentless snark.,
And I do think that you and I had an exchange or two.

But I realize that we all are more complex people than the candidates we support. And it's those things that we have in common that draws us to DU.

:hug:
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jonnyblitz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:25 PM
Response to Reply #8
14. oh i can be just as big of a snark as you are...
i have pet peeve issues that set me (((off))) and I don't let up or budge on them, I don't care if am the only one who thinks how I think.I find that many of the people i make friends with from the lounge i have nothing in common with politics wise. you would (((never))) catch me wishing Clinton a happy bday, for example, but many of my friends just love him..:puke:

I seriously don't recall getting into it with you..oh well. :hug:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:29 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Well, if we did or if we didn't tie up...
:hug: :hug: :hug: :D

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knowbody0 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:19 PM
Response to Original message
10. your thought process is beautiful
and that is a sincere compliment
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:21 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. Thank you, sweetie.
I appreciate that so much. :cry: What a sweet thing to say. :pals:
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SouthernDem2004 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 06:49 PM
Response to Original message
16. Awww I missed the thread against you... ;)
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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 07:00 PM
Response to Original message
17. It's odd that people who publicly demand apologies would feel nauseated
Edited on Fri Aug-19-05 07:18 PM by mzmolly
when others do so? SHEESH!

I will admit I was a nasty mo-fo during the primaries, and I can be to this day *cough* ;) but I also realize that I'm debating basically good people here on this board and we have more in common than not.

So, I publically I apologize(d) to you ~ and others here as well.

The primaries were ugly for all of us, as well as our good candidates. But, in the end most of us are on the same side ... the right side, and we're mature enough to realize that.

Cheers :toast:

From one smarmy nauseating apologist to another :pals:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 07:20 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. LOL!
Yeah, that would describe me, too. Nasty mo fo. :D

:pals:
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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 10:18 PM
Response to Reply #19
21. So ... we're both in the "smarmy, nauseating, nasty mo-fo club?!"
Cool! :+
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 12:45 PM
Response to Reply #21
38. Think we can get Skinner to give us a group?
:D
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progmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 07:02 PM
Response to Original message
18. Maddy - that is really cool.
And I have to tell you...I am sooooooo glad I wasn't around for the primary wars! :scared:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 07:21 PM
Response to Reply #18
20. Twas a scary time.
And I hope we all learned lessons from it, so that it's not so ugly the next time around.

It was the worst time I can recall on DU. :scared:
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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 10:34 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. Indeed. I hope we've learned lessons ...
:hi:
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Crazy Guggenheim Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 11:00 PM
Response to Original message
23. Though I was not here during the primaries, I got a good taste
of the vitriol from Democrats concerning Howard Dean well after the primaries. I remember about a year ago when Dean mentioned something about how the terrorists alerts may be politically motivated and the rest of the Democrats came right down on him!! So what's happened to the terrorist alerts since Nov. 2? Overall I cannot believe how the Democrats went after their own in the way they should gone after The Repukes.
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KitchenWitch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 11:01 PM
Response to Original message
24. Hear hear
If a heartfelt apology is phony smarminess, than phony smarminess is a good thing.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #24
35. I think so.
:hi:
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 11:04 PM
Response to Original message
25. Hey hey hey, you rock hard like the magic kiss.
It's very inspiring to hear from someone who knows the value of an apology from the giving end.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 12:43 PM
Response to Reply #25
36. What a compliment.
That's such a sweet compliment. :hug:
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Generic Other Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 11:04 PM
Response to Original message
26. It's not nasty to yell at each other during election season
Political discourse requires that you raise your voice and be heard so a consensus can be reached. In the end, we backed Kerry. How we got there doesn't matter.

If you raised your voice or I did, who cares? Today, we agree on who we all want to yell at.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 12:44 PM
Response to Reply #26
37. Yes, I agree...
but the political differences evolved into personal attacks, and that's what I'm sorry about.

:hi:
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JimmyJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-19-05 11:21 PM
Response to Original message
27. I'll NEVER, EVER forgive you for what you said to me during the primaries!
Oh wait, I didn't join DU until after the primaries. Nevermind. :hi:

I guess this means I still lurve ya :loveya:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 12:38 PM
Response to Reply #27
33. I lurve ya too.
I'm so glad that you weren't here during the primaries to see what a complete and utter bitch I can be. :D
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Old_Fart Donating Member (805 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:19 AM
Response to Original message
29. When someone is two faced how do you know which one is talking?
I have never been able to understand how that works. ;)
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hfojvt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:26 AM
Response to Original message
30. I thought it was jchild who did that?
Always maintain deniability.
Anyway, I want to know, what happened with your car/trip?
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Old_Fart Donating Member (805 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 11:02 AM
Response to Reply #30
32. How does one do that?
:shrug:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 12:41 PM
Response to Reply #30
34. My car blew up as I approached Dallas.
Had to be towed home by my father. First night, we stayed in a roach hotel. And I do mean literally a roach hotel. Second night, we stayed at a Best Western.

Then my dad towed us home. Come to find out, the quick lube place that "changed" my oil--didn't. Didn't change the filter either. Just topped off my oil with a little more oil, which means that they overfilled my oil, and they left the old filter on.

I'm persuing having the quick lube place pay for the new motor.

I had heat exhaustion on the way home from Dallas. Was sick for a couple of days.

It was the road trip from hell. :(
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hfojvt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:12 PM
Response to Reply #34
45. so it wasn't the timing chain?
I would not expect the oil to have anything to do with that but I know very little of cars.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #45
46. No. The bearings are in bits.
Two bearings on the crankshaft shattered. My dad's mechanic said that too much oil could have caused it. From what DUers explained to me, and from what the mechanic said, the oil gets beaten into an aerated foam and can't lubricate like it should, and then BAM, the bearings go.

Thanks for asking. :hi:
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WilliamPitt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:12 PM
Response to Original message
39. Go fuck yourself
:P
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Crazy Guggenheim Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:15 PM
Response to Reply #39
40. This is going to get good.
:popcorn: :popcorn: :popcorn:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:18 PM
Response to Reply #40
42. Nah, he knows I want to bear his children.
I'll take only a certain amount of abuse from him. :7
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:17 PM
Response to Reply #39
41. I think the only time you and I ever tied up was over something...
totally stupid.

Actually, if you'll remember, I was on YOUR SIDE when everyone berated you about that $600 dinner.

But since you told me to fuck myself (and that would be a treat, these days) I'll just tell you to go eat fish heads. :P
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WilliamPitt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 01:22 PM
Response to Reply #41
44. That's it
I'm going to sit in the back yard and eat worms.
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #44
47. Alright, Alright...
I'm sorry. Please don't go eat worms. :D
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Old_Fart Donating Member (805 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:26 PM
Response to Reply #44
48. Night crawlers?
What are you trying out for Fear Factor? :rofl:
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Maddy McCall Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:27 PM
Response to Reply #48
49. If he really wants to make me feel guilty, he'll eat some of those...
Big Reds. The ones that are the size of your finger, the ones that poop massive amounts of that sticky stuff. :D
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Old_Fart Donating Member (805 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:34 PM
Response to Reply #49
50. "Big fat juicy ones"
Not little teeny weeny ones :9
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Moderator DU Moderator Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:36 PM
Response to Original message
51. Locking.
Since everyone's made up (so to speak).
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