OK, kids, it's time for NAME THAT COMPANY

[Montauk6]

In my 2003 Annual Report, I stated the following to my "stakeholders":

"What it takes for a company to do business in the 21st century is rapidly changing. Technology has overcome distance and made us an increasingly interdependent global society. Companies are no longer accountable only to local or national interests, but also to the whole world. For a company to be allowed to work globally, it must be able to meet society’s needs for goods and services without compromising the natural or social resources of the global community. It must not only be a business leader, but also a good corporate citizen."

I also reassured my "stakeholders" with the following data:

"Consolidated revenues for 2003 were U.S.$16.271 billion, an increase of 29.4 percent over 2002. This was largely attributable to activity on our government services projects. . . Non-U.S. revenues were 73 percent of total revenues in 2003, compared to 67 percent in 2002."

What company am I?

[blondeatlast]

1. Halliburton, although that "corporate responsibility" BS makes me wonder.

I stand by my guess.

[Montauk6]

2. We HAVE A WINNAH!!!!

:party: :toast: :bounce: :party: :toast: :bounce: :yourock: :headbang: :woohoo: :applause: :applause: :woohoo: :patriot:

[Montauk6]

3. Yep, our old friend Helluvaburden, Inc.

Here's the full uncensored profit data statement (you'll see why it would've been a dead giveaway)

Consolidated revenues for 2003 were U.S.$16.271 billion, an increase of 29.4 percent over 2002. This was largely attributable to activity on our government services projects, primarily work in the Middle East. Non-U.S. revenues were 73 percent of total revenues in 2003, compared to 67 percent in 2002.

More from that "stakeholder" (you can tell I love that one!) reassurance:

This year has been an unusually challenging one for Halliburton.We have continued to move toward the settlement of the asbestos litigation that has consumed so much of our energy and resources in recent years. We have experienced the strain of ongoing media and Congressional scrutiny stemming from our work in Iraq. We have confronted the challenge of doing business in a war zone on a scale that’s never been attempted before by any contractor, and have dealt with the associated tragic losses inflicted on our employees and on our subcontractor personnel.

further down...

For years, we have been at the forefront of community relations, workplace safety and environmental protection.We have contributed to the economic development of communities around the world by helping to deliver oil and gas revenues to host governments through local employment and trade. We have added to the betterment of mankind by being part of an industry that meets basic human needs for shelter, transportation and power, and we have participated in the development of energy-related technologies.


More comic lunacy here: http://www.halliburton.com/about/H03948_04.pdf (NOTE: PDF reader required)