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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:50 PM
Original message
Bigotry came a'knocking at my door today
I am a teacher in a small South Carolina community which is predominately white with a small, but growing, Latino community. Today I received an e-mail from an angry parent who accused me of putting her son at a disadvantage because I occasionally (her word: "constantly") speak Spanish with another student in the class, who is from Mexico. The manner in which the e-mail was worded, it was as if I teach only in Spanish, which is not the case. As the Mexican student is the only non-white student in all of my classes, I do this to let him know that he is welcome and accepted in my class; and that I can and will meet him half-way in this multi-cultural world in which we all live.

The parent accused me of talking maliciously about her child in that "evil language" (her actual words :grr: ). My questions are: 1. If neither you nor your child understand Spanish, then what makes you think we are talking about your child? 2. How do you even know what we are saying? 3. What makes Spanish an evil language? 4. Is it that you are afraid of anything outside of your ignorant, lilly-white little bubble?

I have yet to respond to this parent and I am wondering whether or not I should (Can one reason with a bigot?). I did speak with the son of this parent and explained everything to him (at one point I even reversed the situation: how would you like to be the only American student in a Mexican school?) and he now understands what I am doing and has no hard feelings about this. He also told me that when he mentioned my use of Spanish during class time his mother "got really pissed".

Bigotry sucks!
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sakabatou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:51 PM
Response to Original message
1. Reply with your questions.
Leave out #4.
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calico1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:03 PM
Response to Reply #1
28. Hey, I speak Spanish fluently.
Does that make me evil? ;-)

I think you handled it well. The boy (white) is probably embarrassed by his stupid mother.
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sakabatou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 06:25 PM
Response to Reply #28
33. What about other languages?
Edited on Tue Sep-20-05 06:26 PM by sakabatou
Is Japanese evil? Or what about Hebrew?
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Commie Pinko Dirtbag Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 07:55 PM
Response to Reply #28
37. Wow. I was practically BORN evil!
Being the son of Spaniards and all.
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:53 PM
Response to Original message
2. Save the email and bring it up with the principal first. That way
the principal will know what is going on when this woman approaches him/her with this crazy rant. Perhaps a meeting between you, the principal and the crazy lady. Good luck. :hi:
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youthere Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:09 PM
Response to Reply #2
8. Good advice Mrs. Grumpy..
I would also meet with the superintendent. Good luck.
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bleedingheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:52 PM
Response to Reply #2
12. could not have said it any better
no good will come from answering the email directly...cuz the crazy lady will only froth at the mouth even more...

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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:19 PM
Response to Reply #2
31. Best advice ever MrsG
Don't want to fly solo because it could come bad on you.

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ProudToBeBlueInRhody Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:53 PM
Response to Original message
3. I agree with Saka
Once you ask questions that force them to defend their idiotic views, they generally just make themselves look like bigger idiots.
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:57 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. No, questions make it seem that you want dialogue.
And gives her a chance to entrench herself and defend herself.

Declarative statements only in this instance, and quick dismissal of the mother.
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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
4. Certainly, you must respond to her
You don't want to her to have yet another thing to hold against you.

What a racist bitch, though. Sheesh. "Evil language". Sure, I think the Mexican form of Spanish is one of the ugliest languages on god's green earth, but evil? No way! No languages is evil.

Ask her if she praises Jesus with that mouth. Anyway, no, you shouldn't ask her that.


But yes you should respond - I would respond tersely and succinctly, let her know you hear her concerns, that you think they are fucking ridiculously evil (without saying that), and that you will continue on just as you have because there actually is no issue at all.
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petronius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:59 PM
Response to Original message
6. I think you should clear any response with your principal first
Anything you send back that's even remotely snarky can be spun as you attacking the parent. Do you think the school board would back you up if a couple of asshat parents made a stink?
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:00 PM
Response to Original message
7. Reminds me of some of the outrageous people I meet in retail
And I work in the Bay Area, one of the most culturally diverse areas in the country. We had a woman one day accost the deli manager and demand that the manager help her as all the other deli employees were Mexican and spoke "that dirty Mexican" language among themselves. The most amazing thing was that this woman spoke with a heavy Eastern European accent, so she was obviously an immigrant herself!

The other day, we had a man who told this same deli manager that the service in the deli was terrible (it is not - he'd been verbally abusing the poor girl who was trying to help him and she never once got rude or out of line) and that they'd do better if they hired more "white people". This is the same guy who told me one day that a man should be doing my job (wine and liquor - apparently he felt it was too heavy for me) and that I should be "wrapping flowers or something." He was asked by the manager to leave and not return.

I pity the boy in your class, having such a narrow minded parent.

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sakabatou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:16 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. If only we could lock them up with the Wal-Mart smilie
in the jail in the Wal-Mart back room...
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nickgutierrez Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:12 PM
Response to Original message
9. Forward the email to the principal, and ask for his/her advice
Including the explanation as to why you converse with the student in Spanish.

It seems to me that it's the best way to avoid making this an issue between you, the parent, AND the school - and if the parent wants to make this between the two of you, you're covered.
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Bossy Monkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:50 PM
Response to Original message
11. Sounds like paranoid schizophrenia came knocking too
I'd say go with what MrsG and antiwarwarrior said. Sorry this happened here; normally we're a real nice bunch. (I went to Cola. public schools from 3d grade on; generally it was a peaceful experience.)
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 03:53 PM
Response to Reply #11
17. I attended Columbia public schools from second grade
until violence became a problem at Dreher in 1974 (I was in the tenth grade). Then I went to Cardinal Newman until I graduated.

Hello, homie! BTW, I work in the upstate and the sanctimony of the conservative element there has brought me back home to Columbia. So I commute in to work, then leave when the day is over.
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Bossy Monkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:09 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. I remember that riot; they came over to Hand afterwards
but everybody just stood around a lot. No punches were thrown; it was just very tense. Heck, when I was at Dreher, we had a murder in the parking lot. As I recall, it was over a radio. On an earlier occasion, the killer had had a psychotic episode in the canteen, going more or less completely berserk. He kicked me in the butt while I was trying to hie from the premises in the shortest time possible, marking my zero degree of separation from the only murderer I've ever encountered (hopefully). See how much you missed at CN? (Really, the rest of the public school experience was fine, and I wouldn't have traded it. I have decidedly mixed feelings about the new Dreher, but that's mostly issues with how they made like USC and ate a neighborhood.)
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:32 PM
Response to Reply #18
22. I don't like what is going on with the Dreher campus either
The Flora campus is surprising as well; all those mobile classrooms have totally concealed the original campus. Hand has done the same thing. I rather enjoyed the athletic field when I lived on Duncan St.

I have recently returned after six years in the upstate and the changes around town have caught me unaware at times, especially all those new four-way stop signs in Shandon.
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mitchum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 07:48 PM
Response to Reply #22
35. Hey, I lived on Duncan St for 12 years when I lived in Cola!
(cue up that Disney small world song :))
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miss_kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:56 PM
Response to Original message
13. My first thought was show it to the Principal
I see others have responded that way already. That's what they are paid for.
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China_cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 01:59 PM
Response to Original message
14. I agree with the others who say
take it up with your superiors first before you do anything else. CYA

But you could fantasize about sending her a response...in Spanish.

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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 02:35 PM
Response to Original message
15. Thanks to all of you for your advice
I have decided to share this with the principal because of the bigotry involved and to keep detailed records of the event. SC has such a bad history concerning racism and bigotry that we must fight it everytime we encounter it.

I hope that my conversation with her son will ease the situation as he seemed to understand once I explained things to him. He wanted to talk to his mother first and explain better what was going on before I responded to address her concerns. He did say to watch out for his mother as she has confronted most every teacher he has ever had.

My main concern is that one can rarely reason with an ignorant bigot. There are just so many people in this area who are afraid of anything that is different or that they do not understand. I am lucky that I have a good and supportive principal.
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C_eh_N_eh_D_eh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:36 PM
Response to Reply #15
23. The kid sounds a lot smarter than his mom.
He seems to be resisting the brainwashing that affects most children living with right-wing parents. More power to him.
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:13 PM
Response to Reply #23
30. My sentiments exactly
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:53 PM
Response to Reply #23
32. That is what I was thinking
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 02:39 PM
Response to Original message
16. well i'd just ignore the parent
one rudeness does not justify another

i am from the south & i was taught it is rude to speak a foreign language in front of someone who doesn't understand

to a certain extent i feel you should save the spanish for when you are in a situation where ALL understand the language, unless it is indeed a teaching situation

otherwise you are always going to have hurt feelings & ppl convinced you are laughing at them behind their back in front of their face, as it were

that said, the email sounds just as rude if not more rude -- how can a language be "evil" -- and i would be tempted to ignore it

after all, not all emails get thru

& the parent may feel bad later when she realizes what she wrote & how ignorant she sounds

besides, you can't reason w. a bigot, bigotry & race hate are not abt reason

since you already discussed the matter w. the student in question, i see no reason to discuss agn w. the parent

ignore her is my advice





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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:11 PM
Response to Original message
19. Maybe you could explain it to her in the same way you explained it to her
son? And also you could assure her that you respect ALL of your students as individuals, her son included?

It probably won't help, but it might be worth a try to explain it in the nicest way possible.

PS - Do they teach the evil language at your school? I taught in a rural Georgia county and the ONLY foreign language class available was Spanish.
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:24 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. Yes, we have seven Spanish teachers
I teach German and have three other Latino students, but they are in the sections scheduled for next semester; I have and still speak Spanish with them frequently as well as in German when I see them. I try to keep them guessing which language I will use with them and vice versa; it's a game we play.

I use the Spanish in this particular class to demonstrate that foreign languages are real and actually work. In my higher levels, I have German-speakers with whom I can converse to get this point across.

The student in this particular class is from Morelia, the city where my uncle and his family lived for ten years. So, we have something in common (well kinda).

The student whose mother sent me the e-mail asked me to wait until he could talk to her tonight, so I'm waiting until tomorrow to see what happens. He even asked her not to contact me in the first place.
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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:38 PM
Response to Reply #20
25. Ah. Sounds like the kid is ok. Maybe he can get her to drop the whole
thing.

Sounds like you've got some good teaching methods!

I live in an area with a large Latino population and have picked up a few words - I'm sure I sound hilarious when I use them, but the people I'm trying to converse with are always delighted and usually give me a few more words and phrases. A fun way to learn a language and meet your neighbors.
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:59 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. Thanks
The young fellow and I even shook hands and agreed that there were no hard feelings toward each other after our conversation.
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Iris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 07:33 AM
Response to Reply #26
42. He will definately remember you later on in life!
Again, good job!
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BikeWriter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:29 PM
Response to Original message
21. CYA! Tell your bosses!
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ulysses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:37 PM
Response to Original message
24. evil language???
:sigh:
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:02 PM
Response to Original message
27. People who speak 4 or more languages are called polylingual
People who speak three languages are called trilingual.

People who speak two languages are called bilingual.
.
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And people that speak only one language are called mericuns.
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:12 PM
Response to Reply #27
29. I can speak four, if we may count English...
I can also speak German, Spanish and Polish (and some Russian but not enough to say that I can speak it). I use all of them in my classroom. I want the students to know that there is a big world out there and not everyone speaks English. I also want them to learn the benefits of at least trying to use another language.
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Commie Pinko Dirtbag Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 08:00 PM
Response to Reply #27
38. What about people who speak languages that are written in cuneiform?
:evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin: :evilgrin:
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 06:34 AM
Response to Reply #38
40. No skills there
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rug Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 06:39 PM
Response to Original message
34. Answer her email in Spanish.
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DawgHouse Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 07:50 PM
Response to Reply #34
36. Oh, do it! Do it! Do it!
And please post the response here ;)
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fleabert Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 08:04 PM
Response to Original message
39. I would suggest sharing the letter with the admin...don't want this to
hit the fan, believing that she won't slander you no matter how reasoned a response you give her.

Offer to have your class taped or visited at any time.

and, to share how i really feel about that shitty letter, 'fuck that bitch!'

My dh and his family are bilingual, spanish as a first language, and the only reason they are completly fluent in both languages is because of teachers like you! Don't stop!
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Left_Winger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 06:52 AM
Response to Reply #39
41. Today is a new day in this matter
and I'm waiting to see if anything more comes of this. I will not see the student until mid-morning. As of this morning there is not another e-mail from the parent. I am going to speak with the principal about this as soon as I can get in to see him.

Thank you for your support and compliment about my teaching methods. Rest assured that I will continue to teach in the manner I always have. I find it to be most effective with the majority of the students.
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 07:55 AM
Response to Original message
43. Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!
I'm sorry you have to put up with this BS. I agree with the above poster who said that you should respond with the first 3 of your 4 questions... though I know you are tempted to add in #4.
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Bridget Burke Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 07:59 AM
Response to Original message
44. After you've dealt with the immediate situation....
Perhaps you could suggest your school offer Spanish classes? If there's no time during the day, how about classes after school--for those who are interested?

It's a pity that too many of us are only exposed to one language when our minds are young & flexible.


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