How do you start Dating again after 10 years?

[corarose]

I have only been out several times since my Mom died 10 years ago.

How do you meet someone new and if you are afraid of dating how do you get over that hump.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

[THUNDER HANDS]

1. lots of ways

There's online dating services for people to dip their toe in the water.

Plus there's always the proverbial bars and clubs.

Or you could try meeting someone at some random place - like the library or grocery store or bondage club.

:D

[benddem]

2. Join the local democratic party

At least the people you meet are like minded. Go to a Dean Meetup. Lots of great people at ours. :kick:
Become a precinct committee person. Then canvass your neighborhood.
Good luck

[FarLeftRage]

3. Very good question

I've only been out on two dates since December, 1989.

Once with a fundy-nut and the other with a daughter of an old family friend.

Needless to say neither of them went very well.

I just quit an online "dating service", because of the really crappy service they offered.

I'm too old for the bar scene...

So I guess, I'll remain lonely until I meet someone by random change.

Sorry, I couldn't help...

[Wcross]

5. Your not alone

I stopped trying after a bad break-up (you know- she broke up with me two months AFTER she found her new lover). I hold no ill will towards her, I guess I was as much at fault as she was. I was ready to marry her, we had been going together for 3 years and there was talk about marriage. I kind of got gun-shy and was afraid of falling for another woman. I have been out of the dating pool for over ten years, and that water STILL looks mighty cold! I have no clue how to start again?

[HEyHEY]

4. You can start with me

;-)
kik kik

[sam sarrha]

6. really drunk chicks in sleasy bars...

[Wcross]

7. Used to work in the 80's

Now, with the Aids epidemic it is a very risky to do crap. The last place to go is a bar, I would rather hang out in the produce dept of the local supermarket!

[HEyHEY]

9. Any suggestions?

[Wcross]

8. Very good question!

I am in the same situation as you are more or less. I sure would like to see the suggestions.

On the bright side, you can do whatever you please. You don't have to call home if you decide to stay out all night. You don't have to worry about what you spend your money on- if you want to drop a grand on a computer or tv, you can do it without consulting anyone!
You have no IN-LAWS! I hear people say they have difficult things happen over the holidays with in-laws.
I am happy to be single in some ways, I guess freedom sways me more than romance.

[corarose]

10. I got grossed out one time when the guy

Started talking dirty over the phone and I was wondering if that was something new out.

I am 40 years old and when I was 20 if a guy started talking filthy to you they got the phone slammed down on them.

I haven't been out in 10 years that's why it grossed me out and I know that sounds weird.

[Catfish]

11. I don't know

I am just 2 months out of a 7 year relationship and not interested in dating, there's too much still needing to be sorted out and I'm fairly happy being alone. It is funny to be suddenly single again. The couple of men who have expressed an interest in me have seemed sort of odd but maybe it's because I'm not used to it. One told me I could either accept a date now or forget it as he "doesn't have time to waste". The other follows me around the gym and stares at various body parts, but not the ones you'd think. He comments on my various muscles and asks me questions about my feet and knees. I just found out he's an avid runner and a pathologist so I don't know if he wants me to run or if he thinks I might be diseased.

[TheZoo]

12. 10 years?

Just be the person that we've known. You've been through a lot, and you're still a very strong, warm and loving person.

I was going to start a similar thread. It's November, it's been 2+ years since Marie O8)has gone to a better place, I my only companionship has been her kids in 3 coats.

I hope that you do find someone as special as you.

[corarose]

13. It's gets hard around the holidays right?

I feel for you and I know that you loved Marie. Sometimes I wish that we could fast forward time and get around the Holidays. Each year I have to watch people with kids, holding hands, kissing, and loving each other during the holidays and it makes it so hard to deal with.

My Birthday gets me depressed because that means I am another year older and another year without someone during the holidays.

I miss my Mom & Pets/Kids.

[Catfish]

14. Holidays

I've spent the last couple of years in a deteriorating relationship. I'm actually feeling glad about being alone for the holidays this year. Holidays are terrible when you're with someone that makes being alone seem much better. Even the dogs and cats seem happier now by not living with a very negative person. I think he even depressed the pets.

[ScreamingMeemie]

15. Good to see you TheZoo!

:hi:

[TheZoo]

17. Good to be seen

How are you doing Mrs. G?

You're so right corarose, this is probably the begining of the worst part of the year. There's Thankgiving, X-mas, (skip New Years, because it was "my" holiday), then all of a sudden it's Valentine's Day.

There was another thread about the seasons. I can't even think in that grandose scheme; I mean on October 30th, I met Marie, On July 30th, we got engaged, on May 30th, we got married, and on September 30....well, some of you know.

Life just sucks when you're a 37-year old widower, who's best prospects are a great 12+ year past.

P.S. I hope I didn't kill another thread, I'd like to know what to do.

[ScreamingMeemie]

18. I'm doing okay...You will get through this you know, you've got

a whole bunch of people in your corner. I admire your strength. I know that sounds hollow, but I truly do. Hug those furbabies...they'll help see you through.

:hug:

[TheZoo]

19. They have been hugged

And loved. Right now, they seem to be the only ones in my corner that I can touch.

Thank you Mrs. G for your kind words, but there are others that deserve them more than me. I'm not just saying that either.

[corarose]

20. You are too young to stay single

No matter what age anyone is you shouldn't be alone unless things in someones life prevent them from having a future with someone.

With what all has happened to me I know that no one is going to want me so I put a shield up around me and that way I won't get hurt.

You need to find someone you are a nice guy and you are young.

[TheZoo]

21. Thank you Cora....

I am the oldest 37 year old male that anyone knows; my physical age is 37, but I'm mentally and emotionally 60-something, or whatever the average age of a widower is.

You are a great woman, who has been through more than someone should go through. I did not mean to take over the thread, this is your thread. I hope that you do find someone as special as you are to treat and love you the way you deserve. You are probably the strongest person that I know, don't ever change.

[corarose]

22. A broken heart you can never mend.

When you get hurt so bad you put a shield up around you. After everything that has happened in my life I don't know If I can love someone either.
Something happened to me when my apartment was robbed back in March. I felt like I lost everything that I had in my heart because of how mean some people can be.
What was stolen I can never get back and it hurt as much as being screwed over by a man that I had loved for 6 years.

In one way I know my life is over but I have to push on with my career because that is all that I will have as my future. A man doesn't want a bum and by the time that I establish myself again I will be too old for a man to want. I am settled with this fact and I know that part of my life is over so I have to push on.

I wouldn't mind a dinner date once in a while and I don't mean where someone else pays the bill. I have allways been a lady that takes a man out on the town no matter what his financial background is.

Oh, you don't know how happy I am for you. You deserve someone in your life.

God Bless

[ScreamingMeemie]

16. Think of any interests you would like to share with someone...

like bowling (join a league), cooking (take a class)...or go to the library. Best of luck and let us know how you are coming along. You are a very sweet person, and I am sure that someone will show up for you. :)