So my kids brought this home from church . . .

[GrpCaptMandrake]

Would you let them continue to attend?

"The Pumpkin Prayer"

Dear God,

As I carve my pumpkin, help me say this prayer:

Open my mind, so I can learn about YOU;
(Cut off the top of the pumpkin)

Take away all my sin and forgive me for the wrong things I do.
(Clean out the inside)

Open my eyes so your love I will see.
(Cut eyes shaped like hearts)

I'm sorry for turning up my nose to all You've given me.
(Cut the nose in the shape of a cross)

Open my ears so your word I will hear.
(Cut ears shaped like the Bible)

Open my mouth so I can tell others You're near.
(Cut the mouth in the shape of a fish)

Let your light shine in all I say and do!
(Place a candle inside and light it)

Amen.

I posted this over at the mandatory Malloy thread, but thought it might be nice to get the opinion of the Lounge crowd.

[WindRavenX]

1. well, it's FROM church

So it's fine.

Now if it was from a public school? Oh hells no.

[GrpCaptMandrake]

3. Even the playing with fire and knives part?

:crazy:

[Oeditpus Rex]

2. Is there a similar one for surgeons?

Like "The Spleen Prayer" or something?

[GrpCaptMandrake]

7. I catch a surgeon

re-shaping my ears into Bibles and we WILL have a problem!

:silly:

[Oeditpus Rex]

11. And if you don't get the president of the United States on this phone

you're going to have to answer to the Coca-Cola Company.

[GrpCaptMandrake]

12. Now see here, Sergeant Batguano

if that really IS your name . . .

[prolesunited]

4. I guess they are trying to put

the Christ back in Halloween.

In any case, following the instructions would result in a really dory-looking pumpkin.

[NMMNG]

17. Put Christ back in Halloween?

I never knew he was there to begin with. :eyes:








:rofl:

[prolesunited]

21. It was a joke

You know, like "happy holidays" are bad because we need to put the Christ back in Christmas. I was trying to be clever but obviously failed.

[NMMNG]

23. I realized that

I had hoped the :rofl: would get that across. I refrained from using :sarcasm: because I didn't want to seem like I was being snippy towards you. :-)

[RevCheesehead]

5. Did they include a picture?

I'm wondering what "ears like Bibles" look like. Open, or closed?

[Floogeldy]

6. Yea clean out the inside that could have fed 4 kids for a day.

:(

[shugah]

8. it's very church-y

so if you want your kids to learn to accept halloween in a christian way but still get to have some fun... i assume if they do the jack-o-lantern with the correct prayer, they still get to go out and beg for candy?

i dunno. halloween is not a real holiday. i wonder why churches worry so much about it. it's alot of fun for kids.

and i cannot answer your question about continued attendence, as my kids would never be in an educational scenario that required a rubber stamp jack-o-lantern for halloween. it's all just fun for us!

[ghostsofgiants]

9. We're talking about a church here...

It's the purpose of the church to bring a religious influence into the lives of those who attend. If those people happen to be kids, they'll make it fun and relateable to the kids. If you don't want your kids to have a religious influence in their lives, why send them to church?

[GirlinContempt]

16. point and match

[spacelady]

10. Cutting in the name of the Lord? Edgy n/t

[DanCa]

13. I could see this on the next episode of nip - tuck a surgeon who

transforms patients to look like a bible. Scarey.

[GrpCaptMandrake]

14. If they do that,

it will be a clear homage to Monty Python's "Elephantoplasty."

:evilgrin:

[DanCa]

15. Is bbc still showing Monty Python? Haven't seen it in ages.

[BrotherBuzz]

18. Christ on a stick, does Ned Flanders attend your church?

I've done everything the Bible says - even the stuff that contradicts
the other stuff! - Ned Flanders

[GrpCaptMandrake]

19. Been reaching for the analogy

and you finally provided it! :toast:

Yeah, the Flanders kids . . . with knives and fire.

[CanuckAmok]

20. Sorry, but I don't believe in Gourd.

n/t

[Fridays Child]

22. Does the pumpkin get circumcised, too? That would be a...

...nice judeochristian touch.

[Tsiyu]

24. PLEASE don't start a thread about pumpkin circumcision

A flame war is sure to erupt.

Personally, I prefer uncut pumpkin, but to each his or her own....