ROFL...good one!

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

George Bush, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld are flying on Air Force One. Bush turns to Cheney and says, chuckling, "You know, I could throw a $1000 bill out the window right now and make someone very happy."

Cheney shrugs and replies, "Well, I could throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten people happy."

Not to be outdone, Rumsfeld says, "Well I could throw a hundred $10 bills out the window and make a hundred people happy."

The pilot rolls his eyes and says to his co-pilot, "Such arrogant jerks back there. I could throw them all out the window and make millions of people happy."

[AirmensMom]

1. LMAO!

:rofl:

Good one! Thanks!

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

14. glad you liked it

[merh]

2. ROFLMAO

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

Thank you - I so needed a good laugh!

:hug: :loveya:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

15. I am a good laugh

[merh]

23. Don't make me come over there and kick your ass!

:grr:

I so hate negative statements about people I love, especially when they are made about people I love by the people I love! x(

:hug: :loveya:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

26. don't threaten me with a good time

[merh]

27. LOL

You just think you would like it! I'm a master at making folks life hell -- just ask my siblings and ex's :evilgrin:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

31. no shortage of hell in my space these days

[merh]

33. (((((((((( hugs )))))))))))))

Sorry things have been tough! You deserve better. :hug: :loveya:

[johnnie]

3. I'll add one that was just sent to me - old but funny -I like Johnny jokes

President Bush was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asked the President if he would like to lead the discussion on the word "tragedy". So the illustrious leader asked the class for an example of a "tragedy".



One little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy."



"No," said Bush, "that would be an accident."



A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy."



"I'm afraid not," explained the president. "That's what we would call a great loss."



The room went silent. No other children volunteered.

Bush searched the room. "Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"



Finally at the back of the room a small boy (Lil Johnny) raised his

hand. In a quiet voice he said: "If Air Force One carrying you and Mrs.

Bush was struck by a "friendly fire" missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy."



Fantastic!" exclaimed Bush. "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be tragedy?"



"Well," says Lil Johnny, "it has to be a tragedy, because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss and it probably wouldn't be an accident either."

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

16. love that joke

[billyskank]

4. I got one!

Donald Rumsfeld...

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

17. haha funny!

[LynneSin]

5. Hey, have you heard this joke yet??

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, the President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

[billyskank]

6. ...

:eyes:

[JimmyJazz]

9. Do I, ONCE AGAIN, need to remind you of your declaration that

anyone posting that joke should be tarred and feathered?
Oh look, it's LynneSin's new gallery pic:

[billyskank]

10. Pass the feathers

:)

[LynneSin]

12. Already did sweetie

:D

It's in another thread somewhere on DU

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

19. and flogged

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

18. have you been slapped today yet?

[JimmyJazz]

30. You're in luck! I just happen to have a trout handy!

[LynneSin]

35. Yummy!!!! Just need a little bit of this....

And a grill and I'm cooking dinner tonight.

Did you catch that yourself?

[Shell Beau]

7. Hahahaha!!

Let's see hope this doesn't somehow turn Brazilian!! Good one though!

[billyskank]

8. It already did

x(

[Shell Beau]

13. NOOOOOOOO!!

Oh the humanity! :silly:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

20. Magic eight ball says "too late"

[Shell Beau]

29. Why do I get the feeling that your magic eight ball is right?

x(

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

32. maybe it's your superior reading skills

:shrug:

[Shell Beau]

34. That must be it!!

:)

[GOPisEvil]

11. !

:spray:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

21. :)

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

22. There..in a desperate attempt to be a bit more narcissistic

I have answered every post in this thread thus far. Now I know how the beautiful people cope.

[GOPisEvil]

28. Attention ho!

:P

[Beware the Beast Man]

36. Wah.

[Name removed]

37. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[StopTheMorans]

38. SNAP!

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

39. I don't even know her

for that matter, I don't know you :shrug:

[FuzzySlippers]

41. self delete

[Devra]

24. that would make me happy

:patriot:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

25. Maybe someone will oblige you someday

[redqueen]

40. hahah ... nice

Heard that one before, but it never gets old.

Wait, maybe I shouldn't say that. :scared: