How to tell Bob the boss to bathe?

[Elidor]

He smells so bad. His miasma follows him into a room, just behind his ignorance, which precedes him. We must be losing customers left and right if this is how he represents in public. I really don't want to hurt his feelings, but I mean, YUCK! :puke: But how to broach it delicately?

Hey! It ATE my poll!

[SofaKingLiberal]

1. An anonymous email as a complaint from a customer.

Or maybe a gift basket of soaps and deodorants for Christmas.
:evilgrin:

[Elidor]

2. I'm afraid that's a bit too subtle for this guy.

I was thinking more along the lines of throwing a brick through his livingroom window with a note that says, "Take a bath or DIE!"

[Orsino]

5. A whole lot of anonymous e-mails should do it...

...eventually.

[0007]

13. Make up a poem about smegma is like the stench of one who

doesn't bath regularly.

Mail him this.

[Elidor]

17. omg

:wow:

[0007]

19. Then that'd do the trick?

[Elidor]

20. I think so

whoa...

[Whoa_Nelly]

3. Your post isn't a poll...oH..OK...now it is :-)

Give him an early Xmas present: Old Spice deodorant, Irish Spring soap, bottle of shampoo, pack of washcloths, an electric throw away toothbrush, tube of Colgate, pack of razors, and some Aqua Velva (is that stuff even made anymore??)

Or just keep a box of Arm & Hammer nearby...every time he approaches, hold it out like using a cross to ward off a vampire. :rofl:

[Elidor]

4. lol!

Perhaps my co-workers and I could tie him down and douse him with detergent and hose him off liberally. He'd be mad for a while, but he'd get over it.

[Whoa_Nelly]

6. Get a swimmer's nose pinch

and put it on every time he comes into the room....keep a few on hand to sharee with customers

[Elidor]

7. Aha! Now we're onto something.

It might get the message across. It would take a week or so, but I believe he'd pick up on it eventually.

[begin_within]

8. Give a gift set of soap and deodorant, etc. in some men's fragrance.

I actually did that once, to someone who I thought never used deodorant, and surprise surprise, it worked wonders.

[Elidor]

12. I could give him a free pass good for one HAZMAT decontamination

:evilgrin:

Oooh, I'm mean tonight.

[LynneSin]

35. NONONONONONONONONONO ON THE Men's Fragrence - AREYOUNUTS!!!

Seriously, think about it.

The guy already is well known for not bathing regularly and stinking all to bits. But if you think that stench is bad wait til you smell that same stench mixed in with Aqua Velvet, Old Spice or any other men's colonge.

The thing about the sense of smell is it acclimates to the odors around it constantly. So if the guy stinks, he probably doesn't smell it and isn't aware that he's offending others. That's also why I get so fricking nauseous from perfume because women will keep spraying it on because they can't smell what they're wearing not realize that everyone else within a 500yd radius can smell it.

I've worked with the bad BO guy who used cologne to cover-it up and I wouldn't even want to wish a co-worker like this even on someone like Sean Hannity or Rush Limbaugh.

Stick with the soaps & deoderants but skip over any kind of cologne

[begin_within]

37. What I meant was, a gift set that includes soap-on-a-rope and deodorant in

a matched fragrance, such as Aramis or whatever. That way in order to use it at all, he has to take a shower and/or put on deodorant. Not a separate bottle of cologne. I actually did this once and they guy started using the deodorant! (It was a roommate 20 years ago)

[LynneSin]

38. okokokok as long as we're not giving them perfume

:D

[ForrestGump]

9. Turn the fire hose on him?

A drive-by soaping?

[Elidor]

10. I could get one of those huge squirt guns & fill it with soap & water

SPLOOSH! He'd be too soggy to get the plate number.

[ForrestGump]

14. There you go

Throw in a little Nair, too, just for fun. :D

[SOteric]

11. Forrest,

you're so understated.

[ForrestGump]

15. Stop picking on me!

You don't even want me to deploy my firehose. :P

[SOteric]

21. I had no idea you even wore those,

but I'd be up for seeing the pictures.

[ForrestGump]

22. All right, then

Now you've seen my firehose. Yes, holeproof and with built-in protection, for use in extreme heat. Please note the size range... :P

[SOteric]

23. Shoe size 6-10...?

That's kind of small for a dude your size, isn't it?

oh.


I mean...erm...do you wear those with pumps? I'd think a firehose required it.

[Elidor]

24. I'm glad you said it

I was biting my tongue there, out of respect for Forrest. :D

[ForrestGump]

29. I get no respect. I tell ya.

Well, except from you. :-)

I appreciate your restraint.

[SOteric]

30. Yes, - probably best not to mention it.

I suspect it's some sort of self-inflicted erosion problem. :7

[ForrestGump]

25. This is a family show

You know I can't say "pump" in this context. :o

Trying to get us all tombstoned?!? Sheeeeeesh.

And it's not a pump. It's a food dehydrator.

[SOteric]

28. Geez Lewwweeeeze!

What kind of sweaty feet do you have that they need their own dehydrator?

[ForrestGump]

32. You know what they say: sweaty feet,

shepherd's warning.

I think.

Something like that.

[SOteric]

33. Yea, though I walk with sweaty feet,

Thy rod and thy staff infection
doth slay mine enemies.

[ForrestGump]

36. Thou layest me down in

nights in white satin
And cooketh and melteth
The most bitchen s'mores....

[DS1]

39. In the Barn on the floor

and up against the door
It was a good thing at last
when taken to task
that I was hung like Eeyore

[tigereye]

16. doesn't having a significant other help?

Could he or she broach the subject? Or if he doesn't have one, that might be why!

[Elidor]

18. I'm not sure if they're together right now or separated

But yeah, that probably has something to do with it.

[bleedingheart]

26. I am terribly sensitive to smells and if you want I can visit your office

an if he is as bad as you say...it will automatically make me gag and vomit on the floor....and it might just set off an asthma attack....

do you think that might help?

note...I can't even be near people who use too much cologne for too long...it just nauseates me...

[LaurenG]

27. Just tell him

Man you stink. There is NO reason for you to stink - so I'm putting you on notice. If you come in stinky again, I will drag your behind to the next level of management and we'll discuss this openly with them. *hands Bob soap and deoderant in a brown paper bag*

[kick-ass-bob]

31. watch it. I'll fire your ass.

:P

[Elidor]

34. LOL!

Bob? Izzat yoo?