Time for Another "Worst Song of All Time" Thread

[CO Liberal]

Let's see how many crappy songs we can think of.......

[Semi_subversive]

1. Muskrat Love

[Cadfael]

21. You took the (despicable) words

right out of my mouth!

:puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke::puke:

[chefgirl]

2. FEELINGS.....

Nothing 'worse' than feelings.......

-chef-

[XanaDUer]

3. "I've Been To Paradise

But I've Never Been To Me"

Charlene

[SheilaT]

4. "Honey"

The only good thing was the hilarious spoof the Smothers Brothers did with it.

[neuvocat]

5. Any Backstreet Boys song

Same for N'Synch, Vanilla Ice, and any other lame-o boy band from the late 90's.

[Parche]

6. worst

Anything Country or Rap

Or

1000 miles by; Vanessa Carlton
smooth by; matchbox 20 and santana
little bit of this; by michele branch and santana
smooth operator; Sadie
anything by Paul Simon
The Who
Rolling stones

[BurtWorm]

7. Ooga chucka ooga chucka ooga chucka

the one that starts that way. I want to say "More than a Feeling," but I like that song (by Boston). Is it "Hooked on a Feeling?" "High on a Feeling?"

[kmla]

9. Hooked on a Feelin' - Blue Swede

- done originally by B.J. Thomas, if I'm not mistaken...

[scucci]

39. For your viewing displeasure -David Hasselhoff!

http://www.ifilm.com/filmdetail?ifilmid=2433520


hahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Arugula Latte]

8. "I Just Called to Say I Love You"

came to mind. Maybe it's because I caught "High Fidelity" on the tube recently.

Or, how about "Torn Between Two Lovers."

[kckc]

10. Stop it!

I'm still trying to scrub "Daddy Don't You Walk So Fast" from my brain! Oh wait, now it's Ooga Chaka Ooga Chaka. Hell, I'll never get to sleep tonight.

[CBHagman]

26. Oy weh, you mentioned Wayne Newton!

YOU COULD HAVE GONE ALL DAY WITHOUT DOING THAT. Thanks a lot. Now I'll have that horrible image and his horrible songs in my head all evening.

Okay, for a parade of puke-inducing music, can anyone beat...

"Lady" by Kenny Rogers

"Run, Joey, Run" by David Geddes

"Close Enough to Perfect" by some Alabama (Sample lyric: "She's been known to wear her pants too tight, and drinking puts her out just like a light." Sheer poetry, and so tender, too.)

"Long-Haired Lover from Liverpool" by Jimmy Osmond

Whitney Houston's screaming, bellowing "Didn't We Almost Have It All?"

And I also hate Minnie Riperton's "Loving You," but may she rest in peace anyway.

[kckc]

36. OK, you got your revenge

The long-haired lover from Liverpool has invaded my brain now. Perhaps a little "Paper Roses" by big sis Marie will calm you down so you won't be so mean! :)

[underpants]

11. I'm proud to be an American where at least I know I'm free......

Great that is in my head now.

[stanwyck]

24. Detest that song

although just admitting that will probably get me on one of Ashcroft's lists. They played Lee Greenwood at my son's "graduation" from boot camp at Parris Island. I sat there, holding onto my daughter's arm, saying "It's OK, honey, it'll be over soon." Why can't we have beautiful music which exemplies what it means to be an American instead of this horrific macho braying junk? Then, there's that truly awful "Have you forgotten? Bin Laden?" Uh, no, how could we, he's still out there somewhere. But let's keep using music to push a warmongering, blood lust image of our country.

12. silly love song

or whatever the exact title is by Paul McCartney.
It's not that bad a song if someone of lesser substance had written it, but a comedown for Paul considering his previous output.

[kmla]

13. Abracabra - Steve Miller Band

I have beat this drum in many a thread... And will continue to do so. This is the most horrid piece of dreck ever recorded, and was a virulent pox on the airwaves for too long in the early 80's. An egregious waste of petrochemicals to produce albums for this horrendous, foul-smelling piece of pop culture effluent.

:puke:
:puke:
:puke:
:puke:

[DancingBear]

17. An absolute waste of petrochemicals

Especially considering "Space Cowboy" and "Living In The USA."

Steve, what happened??

"Somebody get me a cheeseburger!"

[SmileyBoy]

14. "Like Toy Soldiers" by Martika

You ALL LOSE. I WIN!!! NOBODY has made a worse song than that piece of idiotic filth from 1989. ANY OTHER song that is horrible in history is 1 MILLION times than that piece of cow dung.

"Step-by-step, heart-to-heart, left-right-left, we allllll faaaallll dooowwwwnnn... Like tooooyyyy soooldieerrrsss...."

Oh GOD, now I can't STAND it!! That song is etched in my head again!!! OK, time to turn on my Kazaa lite and listen to some Mudvayne. That'll cure what ails me.

And like I said, YOU ALL LOSE. I CAME UP WITH THE WORST. All your other songs are pure genious compared to this pile of goat intestines of a song.

[LittleDannySlowhorse]

25. I beg to differ

We Built This City - Jefferson/Airplane/Starship

My whole office sat around for an entire afternoon trying to come up with a worse song than that one, and drew a blank. I cannot hear it and not fly into a rage so intense that one could, under its influence, lift a car.

Honorable mentions:

Total Eclipse of the Heart - Bonnie Tyler
Sussudio - Phil Collins
We Didn't Start the Fire - Billy Joel
At This Moment - Billy Vera and the Beaters
Break My Stride - Matthew Wilder
Bad Boys - Gloria Estefan
Who's Johnny - El Debarge
Oh Sherry - Steve Perry
Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now - Fucking Starship yet again
The Heart of Rock & Roll/If This is It - Huey Lewis and the News
Mr. Roboto - Styx
Naughty Naughty - John Parr
You Belong to the City - Glenn Frey
Separate Ways - Journey
I Can't Fight This Feeling - REO Speedwagon
Say You, Say Me - Lionel Richie

[terrya]

15. "You Light Up My Life" by Debby Boone

I'd rather hammer nails into my forehead than to listen to that icky, syrupy dreck.

[slackmaster]

16. "Loving You" by Minnie Riperton

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

[mlawson]

28. OMG, that thing was on the sound system at the grocery

the other day. I stopped my ears everytime she started shreiking...

Ghastly!!!

[Faygo Kid]

58. Was going to post that one.

Hard to beat. Fastest move to change the radio button in history when it came out, circa 1975.

[teevee]

18. Hands Down, It's Ashcroft's "Let the Eagles Soar"..

horrrid!
and he wrote it himself.
If you haven't seen this yet, you should check it out. he's lost his marbles.

http://www.cnn.com/video/us/2002/02/25/ashcroft.sings.wbtv.med.html

[Duncan Grant]

62. OMG!!! Ackkkkkk!!!!

Make it stop! Make it stop! :puke:


(That's the worst thing I've ever seen -- :scared: !)

[Old and In the Way]

19. They're Coming to Take Me Away.

Haha

[ironflange]

20. Even worse is. . .

!AHAH ,YAWA EM EKAT OT GNIMOC ER'YEHT

[SpiralHawk]

22. Where Oh where can my baby be?

the Lord took her away from me.
She's gone to heaven, so I got to be good
so I can see my baby when leave this world.

We were out on a date in her daddy's car
we hadn't driven so very far

There in the road, straight ahead
A car was stalled, the engine was dead.

I couldn't stop, so I swerved to the right
I'll never forget the sound that night...

The crying tires and the busting glass,
the painful screams that I heard last.

etc. etc. ad nauseum

One Last (frikkin) Kiss

[Cooley Hurd]

23. What is that jingoistic piece of crap that Hannity plays...

...at the beginning of his show? "Let Freedom Ring." THAT is the worst song I've ever heard!!!

[SiobhanClancy]

32. "Independence Day"

I googled it ..he just plays the chorus. Here are a couple of the actual verses:


Well she seemed all right by dawn's early light,
Though she looked a little worried and weak.
She tried to pretend he wasn't drinkin' again,
But daddy left the proof on her cheek.
An' I was only eight years old that summer,
And I always seemed to be in the way.
So I took myself down to the fair in town,
On Independence Day.

Well, word gets a round in a small, small town,
They said he was a dangerous man.
But Mama was proud and she stood her ground,
She knew she was on the losin' end.
Some folks whispered, some folks talked,
But everybody looked the other way.
And when time ran out there was no one about,
On Independence Day.

Let Freedom ring,
Let the white dove sing.
Let the whole world know that today,
Is a day of reckoning.
Let the weak be strong,
Let the right be wrong.
Roll the stone away,
Let the guilty pay,
It's Independence Day

I hate it too..and it seems he takes the chorus a bit out of context to the rest of the song.

[alarimer]

64. yes

It is about some abused wife taking her final act of revenge and the kid left behind. It has nothing to do with the actual Independence Day.

[mlawson]

27. Eagles, "Already Gone"; Stone Sour, "Bother".

Already Gone might not be the correct title, but you know which one I mean. "I will sing the victory song... Oooh oooh oooh..." :puke:

That Stone Sour thing is the bleakest, most depressing thing I have ever heard. That 'song' could actually drive someone who is suicidal right over the edge.

[absyntheNsugar]

38. Man...

I fucking hate the Eagles

-The Dude

[CandyCrim21]

66. LMAO

I absolutely love that Stoned Sour song, but your right! It probably did act as a suicide assistant to a few people. LOL

[CandyCrim21]

67. Alot of people actually like this song but.........

I really have no idea why. When I here it, it sticks in my head like its the last thing I will ever here too. I just hate it. Absolutely hate it. and his voice in this song isn't even a note I don't think. Its more like a shreik or a squeal. ready guys here it comes.........Kiss by Prince. :spank:

[VOX]

29. The Seeds' "Pushin' To Hard"

Two chords throughout, "band" incredibly out of tune, pitifully inept lead guitar, sophomoric lyrics, dreadful "vocal."

World-class crap in just about every way.

[flamingyouth]

30. I love that song!

[flamingyouth]

31. Seasons in the Sun

Terry Jacks

<shudder>

[Waistdeep]

34. Hey, that's a classic!

One of the keepers from the 60s!

[CBHagman]

35. "Seasons in the Sun" first defiled the airwaves in the 1970s.

I have ghastly memories of it all...

[Bushknew]

33. Anything by Beck

Listening to a metronome is more pleasing and musical.

[SmileyBoy]

46. I agree. Beck is very overrated.

I don't get why a lot of people think he's so talented. Same deal with Moby.

[NightTrain]

37. My choices for the worst #1 hits by year

1950: IF I KNEW YOU WERE COMIN' I'D'VE BAKED A CAKE - Eileen Barton
1951: BE MY LOVE - Mario Lanza
1952: I SAW MOMMY KISSING SANTA CLAUS - Jimmy Boyd
1953: (HOW MUCH IS THAT) DOGGIE IN THE WINDOW - Patti Page
1954: OH! MY PAPA - Eddie Fisher
1955: AIN'T THAT A SHAME - Pat Boone
1956: HOT DIGGITY (DOG ZIGGITY BOOM) - Perry Como
1957: APRIL LOVE - Pat Boone
1958: HE'S GOT THE WHOLE WORLD IN HIS HANDS - Laurie London
1959: LONELY BOY - Paul Anka

1960: TEEN ANGEL - Mark Dinning
1961: WOODEN HEART (MUSS I DENN) - Jow Dowell
1962: DON'T BREAK THE HEART THAT LOVES YOU - Connie Francis
1963: SUGAR SHACK - Jimmy Gilmer & The Fireballs
1964: MISTER LONELY - Bobby Vinton
1965: MRS. BROWN, YOU'VE GOT A LOVELY DAUGHTER - Herman's Hermits
1966: THE BALLAD OF THE GREEN BERETS - S/Sgt. Barry Sadler
1967: THE HAPPENING - The Supremes
1968: HONEY - Bobby Goldsboro
1969: IN THE YEAR 2525 - Zager & Evans

1970: MAKE IT WITH YOU - Bread
1971: BRAND NEW KEY - Melanie
1972: THE CANDY MAN - Sammy Davis, Jr.
1973: TIE A YELLOW RIBBON - Tony Orlando & Dawn
1974: SEASONS IN THE SUN - Terry Jacks
1975: HAVE YOU NEVER BEEN MELLOW - Olivia Newton-John
1976: THEME FROM "MAHOGANY" (DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING TO) - Diana Ross
1977: YOU LIGHT UP MY LIFE - Debby Boone
1978: YOU DON'T BRING ME FLOWER - Barbra Streisand & Neil Diamond
1979: ESCAPE (THE PINA COLADA SONG) - Rupert Holmes

1980: LADY - Kenny Rogers
1981: THE ONE THAT YOU LOVE - Air Supply
1982: EBONY AND IVORY - Paul McCartney & Stevie Wonder
1983: MANIAC - Michael Sembello
1984: AGAINST ALL ODDS (TAKE A LOOK AT ME NOW) - Phil Collins
1985: CAN'T FIGHT THIS FEELING - REO Speedwagon
1986: ROCK ME AMADEUS - Falco
1987: AT THIS MOMENT - Billy Vera & The Beaters
1988: MONKEY - George Michael
1989: RIGHT HERE WAITING - Richard Marx

1990: BLACK VELVET - Alannah Myles
1991: WHEN A MAN LOVES A WOMAN - Michael Bolton
1992: I'LL BE THERE - Mariah Carey
1993: I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU - Whitney Houston
1994: THE POWER OF LOVE - Celine Dion

Beyond that, I'm too unfamiliar with the #1 hits to render a judgment.

[SmileyBoy]

40. I'll finish the list for you:

1995: ENTER SANDMAN - Metallica
1996: MY HEART WILL GO ON (TITANIC THEME) - Celine Dion
1997: MMM-BOP - Hanson
1998: SMOOTH - Santana w/ Rob Thomas
1999: BYE BYE BYE - N*Sync
2000: OOPS... I DID IT AGAIN - Britney Spears
2001: MY LOVE DON'T COST A THING - Jennifer Lopez
2002: RUN - Collective Soul
2003: SO FAR AWAY - Staind

[scucci]

41. <blushing> I actually like a couple of those songs.

THEME FROM "MAHOGANY" (DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU'RE GOING TO) - Diana Ross & AGAINST ALL ODDS (TAKE A LOOK AT ME NOW) - Phil Collins
The rest are truly bad to atrocious.
Turning in my cool card now.

[geniph]

42. Watching Scotty Grow

that got played so often when I was in high school that one day, a local DJ ripped it off his turntable and yelled into the mike that he was sick of sitting here listening to Scotty rot.

I think the consensus in the community was overwhelmingly positive...

[flamingyouth]

43. How about "Take a Letter Maria"

About the guy who has his secretary dictate a letter to his wife to say he's leaving her, then at the end of the song, he asks the secretary out to dinner. I've always found that song to be extremely creepy.

[SmileyBoy]

44. Are you kidding???!!!

What year was that piece of garbage written???

[NightTrain]

47. 1969. And it's actually a decent soul record

n/t

[flamingyouth]

49. I just find the lyrics creepy

[NightTrain]

57. Tough to argue with that! But remember, this was before...

...the Women's Liberation movement of the 1970s. "Take A Letter, Maria" came out just in the nick of time, because I don't think it would've done too well at the height of bra-burning!

[Red State Rebel]

45. Don Ho sings Shock The Monkey - heard it this morning on the radio....

[sleepyhead]

48. Ballad of the Green Berets

Barry Sadler, 1966.

Number 2 is Tie a Yellow Ribbon by Tony Orlando and Dawn (year?)

[onebigbadwulf]

50. Tuva Luva

Goddamn I hate Save Ferris.

[kyrasdad]

51. Someone beat me to Seasons in the Sun...

But lest we forget...

I'm a little bit country/I'm a little bit rock and roll
Happiest Girl in the Whole USA
Jive Talkin'
Convoy
Disco Duck
My Sharona
Lucky Star
Let's Hear it For the Boy

[bobthedrummer]

52. "Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey"or whatever that Wings song was called-

although quite a few Wings songs are just as horrible especially "Let 'em In", Magneto and Titanium Man, you know what I mean:puke:

[Zorra]

53. Any "Disco" song

written between the years 1975 and 3010.

Shake your booty.:puke:

[Liberal Veteran]

54. Ooooo....I'm telling Disco Stu on you!!!!!!

Blasphemy!!!!!

[Zorra]

55. Who is Disco Stu?

Disco sucks. No exceptions.

It started as a republican plot to dumb down America by sucking people's brains out through their ears.

[kyrasdad]

61. Not all Disco sucks...

I love the Nightlife, Don't leave me this way, Turn the beat around, I will survive, Anything by Donna Summer, all rocked! I can still remember tooling aroung in my Chevy Malibu cranking the extended version of Hot Stuff... sigh... those were the days...

[LTR]

56. WHAT??? No "God Bless The USA"

Sounds like a really bad commercial jingle.

[Faygo Kid]

59. "Honey," "The Night Chicago Died," "Ballad of the Green Berets"

So many, tragically. Must stop here; brain is rebelling against this, and there is a ledge to jump from outside.

[Duncan Grant]

60. Billy Don't Be A Hero - Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods

Billy, don't be a hero, don't be a fool with your life
Billy, don't be a hero, come back and make me your wife
And as he started to go she said, Billy, keep your head low
Billy, don't be a hero, come back to me

:puke:

[The Zanti Regent]

63. Anything sung by Toby Keith

The boy needs to wash his face to get all the brown lipstick off!

[oxymoron]

65. One Tin Soldier (The Legend of Billy Jack) - Coven

from the amazingly awful movie.

[newyawker99]

68. I can't believe that no one mentioned this gem.....

McArthur's Park is melting in the dark
All the sweet green icing falling down
Someone left the cake out in the rain
I don't think that I can take it
'cause it took so long to bake it
and I'll never have that recipe again

Oh Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!

There is no good version of this song.

:puke::puke::puke::puke:

[Sully]

69. She's Just A Country Girl With Her Hot Pants On!

I don't remember the band but it was big on country stations in 1971!

[Zomby Woof]

70. Playground In My Mind

Don't remember who, but it was in 1973. Had lyrics to the effect, "My name is Michael, I found a nickel shiny and new..."

Also, Paper Lace, "The Night Chicago Died", same year. :puke: