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I was 16, and in Japan for a year.
Though my host parents had a little tree, and they'd thrown me an awesome birthday party 4 days before, it was a definite letdown. I remember being on my way home from our teacher's house (we'd done an early-morning church service--in Japanese), then going to see "Young Doctors In Love" and sitting through it twice, because really, what else did I have to do?
My advice re: the relationship--have a candid talk in the next day or so, preferably ASAP. And be as forthright as possible without asking your SO to pull the trigger: "Listen...I know things aren't A+ with us right now. But the holidays are coming, and I'd really like to spend them with you and enjoy them with all our hearts, so we can always remember that, no matter what. After January 1st, we can sit down and have a Heavy, Deep and Real discussion, but let's make the next 12 days as wonderful and special as possible, OK?" That at least will get one major monkey off your back. Then, seriously, DO IT. Celebrate as if there were no tomorrow, as if you had terminal illness and this was going to be your last one. (See: "The Family Stone.") Don't hold back because you're afraid of getting hurt; you're probably going to get hurt eventually someday, so you might as well live with as open and trusting a heart as possible--at least you can look back on it someday and know that you loved wholeheartedly.
As for the work thing: that sucks. (I've worked on major holidays before too, and my mom usually worked Christmas morning or afternoon/evening as an RN.) All you can do is block out the chunk of evening/morning/whenever that you AREN'T working, and make them as self-involved as you want. You wanna watch your favorite Christmas specials or movie for 3+ hours straight? Go for it. You want to cook the most self-indulgent meal of your absolute favorite foods ever? Do it. You want to call or see your best friends in the entire world? Call 'em. Light candles, tons of them. Keep the spirits coming. Put on the happiest music you can think of. Try to find a mix between the things you love the most--the things that make you feel "you"--and doing something so out-there, so ridiculous, so unusual, it'll cause a paradigm shift. (When was the last time you wrapped your entire front door in wrapping paper?) Check the local paper for free or cheap concerts and peformances--they're all over the place this time of year. Take a long walk and look at Christmas lights--and if you have an Ipod with festive music to share, do it with someone special.
Hang in there, kiddo, and update us in 2006 on how you're doing and how it all turned out.
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